| |
第十一季 第六集 |
| 0,0:00:06.85, |
Howie, slow down. |
| |
华仔 吃慢点 |
| 0,0:00:08.38, |
I can't. |
| |
不行 |
| 0,0:00:08.94, |
I'm not allowed to eat for 12 hours before my surgery, |
| |
手术之前12小时都不能吃东西 |
| 0,0:00:11.34, |
and I only got two more minutes. |
| |
我只剩两分钟了 |
| 0,0:00:16.84, |
What surgery are you having? |
| |
你也要动什么手术吗 |
| 0,0:00:19.25, |
I'm stress eating. |
| |
我是压力型暴饮暴食 |
| 0,0:00:20.90, |
My best friend's getting a vasectomy tomorrow. |
| |
我最好的朋友明天要去结扎了 |
| 0,0:00:24.09, |
And you're sad you won't be able to bear his child? |
| |
你是难过自己再也没机会怀他宝宝吗 |
| 0,0:00:28.15, |
Oh, my goodness. |
| |
我的天 |
| 0,0:00:29.48, |
If it's "Vasectomy gone wrong" videos, |
| |
如果是"结扎手术失误"视频集锦 |
| 0,0:00:31.36, |
he's seen them all. |
| |
他已经全部看过了 |
| 0,0:00:32.66, |
Including the one of the guy who's sitting |
| |
包括一个男人看起来像坐在哈密瓜上 |
| 0,0:00:34.11, |
on what appears to be a cantaloupe but is not. |
| |
但其实是他自己血肿蛋蛋的那个视频 |
| 0,0:00:38.06, |
And I'm done. |
| |
我不吃了 |
| 0,0:00:41.13, |
They're going to start making Professor Proton's science show again. |
| |
他们要重新开拍《质子教授科学秀》节目了 |
| 0,0:00:44.69, |
I thought he passed away. |
| |
我还以为他已经过世了 |
| 0,0:00:45.75, |
He did. |
| |
没错 |
| 0,0:00:46.40, |
儿童科学节目常有的科学小实验 |
| |
水中加入几勺苏打粉 再加一点白醋能像火山爆发 |
| 0,0:00:46.40, |
He was cremated, and his remains were put in a baking soda volcano. |
| |
他火化后 骨灰都投进了小苏打火山里了 |
| 0,0:00:52.48, |
Don't make jokes. He meant a lot to Sheldon. |
| |
别乱开玩笑 他对谢尔顿意义重大 |
| 0,0:00:54.87, |
Oh, me, too. I grew up watching his show. |
| |
我也一样 我是看着他节目长大的 |
| 0,0:00:56.61, |
He's one of the reasons I became a scientist. |
| |
他是我成为科学家的原因之一 |
| 0,0:00:58.65, |
Thought you did it just to get girls. |
| |
我还以为你是为了把妹呢 |
| 0,0:01:02.15, |
Joke's on you. It worked. |
| |
哈哈 我不是把到你了吗 |
| 0,0:01:05.96, |
Have they found anyone to replace him? |
| |
他们找到接班人了吗 |
| 0,0:01:07.51, |
No, not yet, and it won't be easy. |
| |
不 还没有 这可不简单 |
| 0,0:01:09.59, |
Arthur Jeffries was an accomplished scientist. |
| |
亚瑟·杰弗里斯是一个成就颇丰的科学家 |
| 0,0:01:12.35, |
You know who'd make a great Professor Proton? |
| |
你知道谁可以演好质子教授吗 |
| 0,0:01:15.20, |
Meryl Streep. |
| |
影后梅丽尔·斯特里普 |
| 0,0:01:18.54, |
She's not a scientist. |
| |
她不是科学家 |
| 0,0:01:20.02, |
Uh, then explain to me why |
| |
那你告诉我 |
| 0,0:01:21.49, |
she has chemistry with literally everyone. |
| |
为什么她和每个人都能产生化学反应 |
| 0,0:01:26.11, |
It would be nice if they cast a woman. |
| |
如果他们能让女演员来演也不错 |
| 0,0:01:28.04, |
新版《神秘博士》和《捉鬼特工队》的主角都是女性 |
| |
|
| 0,0:01:28.04, |
Oh, you've already got Doctor Who and the Ghostbusters. |
| |
你们已经有了《神秘博士》和《捉鬼特工队》 |
| 0,0:01:30.16, |
Leave us something. |
| |
给我们男人剩点吧 |
| 0,0:01:32.88, |
Who do you think it should be? |
| |
你觉得应该让谁演 |
| 0,0:01:34.35, |
Well, it should be a scientist I respect. |
| |
应该选一个我敬重的科学家 |
| 0,0:01:37.07, |
You know, someone with a pleasing voice |
| |
一个声线悦耳动听 |
| 0,0:01:39.60, |
and symmetrical facial features. |
| |
五官均匀对称的人 |
| 0,0:01:42.04, |
Is he talking about himself? |
| |
他是在说他自己吗 |
| 0,0:01:43.32, |
If he's talking, he's talking about himself. |
| |
他说话时 都是在说自己 |
| 0,0:01:46.78, |
I just know how much Professor Proton touched me as a child, |
| |
我只知道质子教授在我小时候触碰了我心 |
| 0,0:01:50.14, |
and I feel that I owe it to him |
| |
我觉得我应该还他这份情 |
| 0,0:01:52.36, |
to try and touch as many children as possible. |
| |
也该像他那样去"触碰"更多孩子 |
| 0,0:02:00.74, |
You should put that on your audition tape. |
| |
你该把这句话放进试镜视频里 |
| 0,0:02:32.32, |
You doing okay? |
| |
你还好吗 |
| 0,0:02:33.69, |
No, I'm very nervous. |
| |
不 人家紧张死了 |
| 0,0:02:47.45, |
Where are you going? |
| |
你要去哪里 |
| 0,0:02:48.91, |
Gift shop. |
| |
礼品店 |
| 0,0:02:49.55, |
There is no gift shop. Sit down. |
| |
这里没有礼品店 给我坐下 |
| 0,0:02:53.67, |
This was your idea. |
| |
这也是你自己的主意啊 |
| 0,0:02:55.72, |
So was having sex, and look where that got us. |
| |
滚床单也是我的主意 你看看后果多严重 |
| 0,0:02:59.50, |
This isn't a big deal. Stop whining. |
| |
这没什么大不了的 别唧歪了 |
| 0,0:03:02.23, |
When you were in labor and I said that, you kicked me. |
| |
你生娃时我也说过同样的话 结果你踹了我 |
| 0,0:03:06.25, |
Howard Wolowitz? |
| |
霍沃德··沃罗威茨 |
| 0,0:03:10.82, |
- Want me to go with you? - No. |
| |
要我陪你进去吗-不用 |
| 0,0:03:12.53, |
- I'll be fine. - Yeah, we got this. |
| |
我没事-对啊 我俩可以的 |
| 0,0:03:14.47, |
Sit down! |
| |
给我坐下 |
| 0,0:03:20.79, |
Wish me luck. |
| |
祝我好运吧 |
| 0,0:03:23.38, |
Other way, buster. |
| |
走错方向了 小子 |
| 0,0:03:31.12, |
Okay, you ready? |
| |
你准备好了吗 |
| 0,0:03:32.23, |
Yeah, almost. |
| |
差不多了 |
| 0,0:03:33.15, |
I'm working on my facial expressions. |
| |
我正在练习我的面部表情 |
| 0,0:03:35.31, |
See, uh, I've got interested. |
| |
看 这是我燃起兴致的表情 |
| 0,0:03:38.44, |
I've got very interested. |
| |
这是兴致高昂的表情 |
| 0,0:03:41.92, |
Enraged. |
| |
暴怒的表情 |
| 0,0:03:46.20, |
Why would you be enraged? |
| |
你怎么会暴怒呢 |
| 0,0:03:48.23, |
Hmm. Better to have it and not need it |
| |
准备要万全 平日多烧香 |
| 0,0:03:49.74, |
than to need it and not have it. |
| |
好过临时抱佛脚 |
| 0,0:03:52.39, |
Okay. |
| |
好吧 |
| 0,0:03:56.00, |
And... |
| |
准备... |
| 0,0:03:56.95, |
rolling. |
| |
开拍 |
| 0,0:03:58.23, |
Hello. I am theoretical physicist, Dr. Sheldon Cooper, |
| |
大家好 我是理论物理学家 谢尔顿·库珀博士 |
| 0,0:04:01.30, |
auditioning for the role of Professor Proton. |
| |
为质子博士一角试镜 |
| 0,0:04:03.72, |
Now, excuse me while I get into character. |
| |
现在 请允许我进入角色 |
| 0,0:04:09.21, |
Hello. I am Professor Proton. |
| |
大家好 我是质子教授 |
| 0,0:04:12.97, |
And today, boys and girls, |
| |
今天 孩子们 |
| 0,0:04:14.49, |
we're going to have fun with science. |
| |
我们要一起进入有趣的科学世界 |
| 0,0:04:16.49, |
Did you know you could calculate the mass of an electron |
| |
你知道可以用手边的家庭用品 |
| 0,0:04:18.90, |
using household items? It's true. |
| |
计算出电子的质量吗 真的可以呢 |
| 0,0:04:20.94, |
All you'll need is a pencil, some paper, |
| |
你只需要一支铅笔 一些纸 |
| 0,0:04:23.09, |
dry ice, rubbing alcohol, |
| |
干冰 外用酒精 |
| 0,0:04:25.02, |
and a spool of 50-micron-thick cobalt-60 wire. |
| |
和一卷50微米细的钴60线轴 |
| 0,0:04:30.08, |
And, remember, don't put it in your mouth, |
| |
要记得 别把线轴放进嘴里 |
| 0,0:04:32.30, |
or instead of becoming a scientist, |
| |
不然你没变成科学家 |
| 0,0:04:33.80, |
you'll become wildly radioactive. |
| |
就先变成放射狂人了 |
| 0,0:04:37.68, |
Hang on. I have a question. |
| |
等一下 我有个问题 |
| 0,0:04:39.27, |
Do you have any experiments that aren't life-threatening? |
| |
你有其他没有致命危险的实验吗 |
| 0,0:04:42.49, |
Come on! That was a perfect take, and you ruined it. |
| |
不是吧 人家拍得好好的 全被你毁了 |
| 0,0:04:46.11, |
Oh, look! Hey, I did need enraged. |
| |
你看 我暴怒的表情用上了 |
| 0,0:04:54.04, |
- Really hurts, huh? - No. |
| |
看来真的很痛啊-不痛 |
| 0,0:04:55.65, |
He's just saying, "Ow can these prices be so low"" |
| |
他只是在说"哎哟 这价格太划算了" |
| 0,0:05:00.71, |
It's gonna be okay. A day or two of rest, |
| |
别担心 只需休息一两天就好 |
| 0,0:05:02.70, |
and you'll be fine. |
| |
你会好起来的 |
| 0,0:05:04.13, |
You know nothing about Jewish people. |
| |
那你真是不懂戏精犹太人了 |
| 0,0:05:10.44, |
Um, let me go check on her. |
| |
我去看看她 |
| 0,0:05:13.98, |
Okay, uh, this is a bit awkward. |
| |
好了 现在有一点小尴尬了 |
| 0,0:05:16.20, |
It says here that I need to check the area |
| |
手册上写我需要检查一下手术部位的 |
| 0,0:05:18.37, |
for redness and swelling. |
| |
发红和肿胀情况 |
| 0,0:05:22.52, |
You know what? It hurts so much, go ahead. |
| |
我已经痛到麻木了 随你便吧 |
| 0,0:05:27.71, |
So you see, boys and girls, |
| |
所以孩子们 |
| 0,0:05:29.18, |
H, or helicity, is the natural variable to use relativistically |
| |
H 也就是螺旋性 是使用相对论的自然变量 |
| 0,0:05:34.33, |
is defined as S dot P, divided by the magnitude of P. |
| |
S·P 再除以P的量 |
| 0,0:05:38.02, |
So the next time someone on the playground tells you |
| |
所以下次如果操场上有人告诉你 |
| 0,0:05:40.41, |
you can only use integral values for the matrix |
| |
你只能用整数值来 |
| 0,0:05:42.65, |
that determines the spin of the antiproton, |
| |
决定反质子的自旋 |
| 0,0:05:44.52, |
you stop being friends with that kid, |
| |
别和那孩子做朋友 |
| 0,0:05:45.99, |
cause he's going nowhere. |
| |
因为他肯定成不了材 |
| 0,0:05:51.30, |
Until next week, this is Professor Proton saying, |
| |
我们下周再会 质子教授跟大家说 |
| 0,0:05:54.04, |
1.00001E+22 |
| |
|
| 0,0:06:03.01, |
That's "Bye" in ASCII binary, |
| |
是美国信息交换标准代码二进制数的"拜" |
| 0,0:06:05.69, |
or good-binary. |
| |
二个拜 拜拜 |
| 0,0:06:15.55, |
So, what do you think? |
| |
你们觉得如何呢 |
| 0,0:06:19.35, |
Well, I already told him that I loved it, |
| |
我已经跟他说我觉得超赞了 |
| 0,0:06:21.37, |
but if you found it confusing or dangerous or-- |
| |
但如果你们有人觉得说得太绕 太危险... |
| 0,0:06:25.42, |
I don't know-- three to four times too long, |
| |
或我随便举例 比如超长了几倍时间 |
| 0,0:06:29.28, |
now is the time to share. |
| |
现在就可以提出你们的意见 |
| 0,0:06:32.76, |
I... I don't know what to say. |
| |
我不知道说什么 |
| 0,0:06:35.21, |
Leonard, do you know what to say? |
| |
莱纳德 你有什么想说的吗 |
| 0,0:06:37.96, |
Sheldon, uh, I thought it, uh... |
| |
谢尔顿 我觉得呢... |
| 0,0:06:40.04, |
It-it looked like you were having so much fun. |
| |
感觉视频中的你 玩得很开心 |
| 0,0:06:45.43, |
That's what you used to tell me to say to Penny |
| |
你以前也教过我用这话应付佩妮 |
| 0,0:06:47.10, |
after one of her terrible plays. |
| |
就在看完她难看的表演后教的 |
| 0,0:06:52.39, |
Well, what was wrong with it? |
| |
所以问题出在哪呢 |
| 0,0:06:53.91, |
You know, did you find it... |
| |
你们会觉得... |
| 0,0:06:55.64, |
borderline psychotic? |
| |
快接近神经病了吗 |
| 0,0:06:59.20, |
I mean, |
| |
我个人觉得呢 |
| 0,0:06:59.66, |
I liked that about it, but... |
| |
我挺喜欢这一点 但... |
| 0,0:07:02.09, |
you guys discuss. |
| |
请畅所欲言 |
| 0,0:07:04.63, |
Do you remember when you were a kid |
| |
你还记得你小时候 |
| 0,0:07:06.75, |
and you'd watch Professor Proton? |
| |
看质子教授的节目吗 |
| 0,0:07:08.80, |
Of course. |
| |
当然啊 |
| 0,0:07:09.65, |
Well, did he ever make you-- I don't know-- |
| |
那他有过让你觉得... 比方说... |
| 0,0:07:13.36, |
hate science and the people who do it? |
| |
痛恨科学与搞科学的人吗 |
| 0,0:07:16.52, |
What are you saying? |
| |
你什么意思 |
| 0,0:07:17.69, |
I-I just think it would be... better |
| |
我觉得你要想改进 |
| 0,0:07:20.38, |
if your contempt for children |
| |
那你对儿童的不屑 |
| 0,0:07:22.20, |
wasn't so much in the foreground. |
| |
就不能够这么堂而皇之 |
| 0,0:07:24.74, |
Well, you want me to lie? |
| |
你是要我说谎吗 |
| 0,0:07:27.32, |
Well, it's not lying-- it's acting. |
| |
这不是说谎 是演戏啊 |
| 0,0:07:29.43, |
Sheldon Cooper may not like kids, |
| |
虽然谢尔顿·库珀不爱小孩子 |
| 0,0:07:31.15, |
but Professor Proton loves them. |
| |
但质子教授很喜欢孩子啊 |
| 0,0:07:33.86, |
Interesting. |
| |
有意思 |
| 0,0:07:36.28, |
You know, I hadn't really thought of it that way. |
| |
我还没用这角度想过呢 |
| 0,0:07:38.27, |
It-It's similar to how I'm afraid of dogs, |
| |
这就像是我本人很怕狗 |
| 0,0:07:41.98, |
but my D&D character likes dogs, you know? |
| |
但我桌游里的角色很喜欢狗一样 |
| 0,0:07:45.70, |
But he's allergic, so he can't be around them. |
| |
但他对狗过敏 所以不能接近狗狗 |
| 0,0:07:49.06, |
Why don't we have a dog? |
| |
我们为什么还不养狗 |
| 0,0:07:53.99, |
Hey, you can always reshoot it. |
| |
你可以重拍一个啊 |
| 0,0:07:56.01, |
Mm, I suppose. |
| |
也是啦 |
| 0,0:07:57.01, |
And, you know, maybe I could even get some tips |
| |
或许这次我还能去请教 |
| 0,0:07:58.91, |
from someone who's acted professionally. |
| |
有过专业演员经历的人 |
| 0,0:08:01.54, |
Sheldon, obviously, I'd be happy to help you out. |
| |
谢尔顿 我当然很乐意帮助你啦 |
| 0,0:08:06.41, |
I don't know what to say. |
| |
我无言以对 |
| 0,0:08:11.26, |
Hey, Sheldon. What's up? |
| |
谢尔顿 怎么了 |
| 0,0:08:12.72, |
I need an acting coach. |
| |
我需要一个演戏教练 |
| 0,0:08:15.23, |
Would you give me Patrick Stewart's number? |
| |
你能给我帕特里克·斯图尔特的电话吗 |
| 0,0:08:15.23, |
知名杰出英国演员 也曾出演过《星际旅行: 初代》 |
| |
|
| 0,0:08:18.78, |
No. |
| |
不能 |
| 0,0:08:19.72, |
Fine. I guess you can do it. |
| |
好吧 你来教也行 |
| 0,0:08:26.56, |
Bernie? |
| |
妮妮 |
| 0,0:08:30.19, |
Where did you get a bell? |
| |
你从哪弄来的铃 |
| 0,0:08:31.83, |
App store. |
| |
应用商店 |
| 0,0:08:36.55, |
Fun. Let me see. |
| |
真好玩 让我看看 |
| 0,0:08:39.80, |
When you catch me, you can have it back. |
| |
等你能抓到我了再还你手机 |
| 0,0:08:43.54, |
You want to lie down, watch a movie? |
| |
你想躺下一起看个电影吗 |
| 0,0:08:46.22, |
I can't. I got my 16-week checkup to get to, |
| |
不行 我得去做第16周的产检 |
| 0,0:08:48.80, |
and then I'll pick up some Chinese for dinner. |
| |
完事后我会买中餐外卖回来当晚饭 |
| 0,0:08:50.66, |
I'll take Halley with me. |
| |
我会把哈雷带上 |
| 0,0:08:52.32, |
You-you sure you're not overdoing it? |
| |
你确定你这样不会太累吗 |
| 0,0:08:54.15, |
- No, it's fine. - Great. |
| |
-没事 不会的 -那太好了 |
| 0,0:08:55.39, |
Then maybe, instead of Chinese, |
| |
那不如别买中餐 |
| 0,0:08:56.48, |
fire up the grill and throw on a couple of steaks? |
| |
去把烤架热了 弄几块牛排如何 |
| 0,0:09:01.08, |
Kung pao chicken, please. |
| |
宫保鸡丁 谢谢老婆大人 |
| 0,0:09:06.46, |
- Oh, boy. - What? |
| |
惨了-怎么了 |
| 0,0:09:07.94, |
They cast the new Professor Proton. |
| |
他们选出新的质子教授演员了 |
| 0,0:09:10.24, |
Is it Sheldon? |
| |
是谢尔顿吗 |
| 0,0:09:11.01, |
Not exactly. |
| |
不是 |
| 0,0:09:12.20, |
Wheaton! |
| |
惠顿 |
| 0,0:09:14.22, |
It's Wil Wheaton. |
| |
是威尔·惠顿 |
| 0,0:09:26.78, |
How was the doctor? |
| |
医生怎么说 |
| 0,0:09:27.98, |
Good, but I have some news. |
| |
一切良好 但我有个事情要说 |
| 0,0:09:30.34, |
Don't say twins. Don't say twins. Don't say twins. |
| |
别说是双胞胎 别是双胞胎 |
| 0,0:09:32.11, |
Don't say twins. |
| |
别说是双胞胎啊 |
| 0,0:09:33.79, |
It's not twins. |
| |
不是双胞胎 |
| 0,0:09:34.91, |
Oh. I mean, because I would have loved them both. |
| |
我是说 我一定会超爱他们啦 |
| 0,0:09:39.20, |
The doctor said I was overdoing it, |
| |
医生说我操劳过度 |
| 0,0:09:40.79, |
so she put me on bed rest just to be safe. |
| |
让我在床上歇着保胎 |
| 0,0:09:43.30, |
Oh, no. |
| |
太心疼了 |
| 0,0:09:54.79, |
It may not look like it, but I'm running to you! |
| |
虽然看起来不像 但我正在朝你飞奔而去 |
| 0,0:10:09.86, |
Hello, Arthur. |
| |
亚瑟 你好啊 |
| 0,0:10:12.20, |
What-what part of "Rest in peace" |
| |
安息这两个字 |
| 0,0:10:15.59, |
don't you understand? |
| |
你是有哪个字不懂 |
| 0,0:10:19.88, |
I suppose you're here because you heard the news? |
| |
我猜你会来是因为你听到消息了吧 |
| 0,0:10:22.48, |
Sheldon, I'm a figment of your imagination. |
| |
谢尔顿 我是从你的想象中虚构出来的 |
| 0,0:10:24.87, |
I don't hear news. |
| |
不是老子听到什么消息 |
| 0,0:10:29.23, |
You're a grumpy figment. |
| |
真是个暴躁的虚构体 |
| 0,0:10:33.53, |
Look, they're remaking your show, |
| |
是这样的 他们要重启你的节目 |
| 0,0:10:35.83, |
and they cast Wil Wheaton as Professor Proton. |
| |
他们选了威尔·惠顿来当质子教授 |
| 0,0:10:39.27, |
And the worst part is, he's not even a scientist. |
| |
而最糟的地方就是 他都不是科学家 |
| 0,0:10:42.64, |
No, the-the worst part is, |
| |
不 最糟的地方是 |
| 0,0:10:44.43, |
I'm sitting on a moist log. |
| |
我坐在湿哒哒的木头上 |
| 0,0:10:51.34, |
We have to stop this and protect your legacy. |
| |
我们得阻止这一切 保护你名声 |
| 0,0:10:54.31, |
What legacy? |
| |
有个毛名声啊 |
| 0,0:10:55.74, |
My-my last two seasons, |
| |
我节目最后两季 |
| 0,0:10:57.33, |
I was on Sunday morningn at 5:30. |
| |
档期是在周日早上五点半播出 |
| 0,0:11:00.78, |
We-we were beat by Davey and Goliath. |
| |
收视率还被陶土儿童节目给打败 |
| 0,0:11:05.70, |
I can't believe you don't care. |
| |
我真不敢相信你都不在乎 |
| 0,0:11:08.20, |
Believe it. |
| |
相信吧 |
| 0,0:11:11.80, |
Well, I care, a lot, |
| |
但我在乎 非常在乎 |
| 0,0:11:13.96, |
and Wil Wheaton will rue the day he ever met me. |
| |
威尔·惠顿绝对会后悔认识我 |
| 0,0:11:18.99, |
I think that's true of most people. |
| |
我觉得大多数人都这么觉得 |
| 0,0:11:27.33, |
Hi, guys. |
| |
你们好啊 |
| 0,0:11:28.44, |
Wanted to check in and see how you two were doing. |
| |
就想过来看看你们俩怎么样了 |
| 0,0:11:30.44, |
We're okay. |
| |
我们挺好 |
| 0,0:11:31.32, |
Yeah, hanging out in bed with my wife, |
| |
对啊 跟我老婆赖在床上 |
| 0,0:11:33.10, |
thawing out some frozen peas in my pants-- |
| |
用裤裆内的体温给冻豆子化冻 |
| 0,0:11:35.35, |
living the dream. |
| |
宛如梦中啊 |
| 0,0:11:39.14, |
Oh, I'll get her. |
| |
我去哄她吧 |
| 0,0:11:40.41, |
I thought Raj was helping you out. |
| |
我以为拉杰会来帮手呢 |
| 0,0:11:42.30, |
No, he had to work. |
| |
没来 他得上班 |
| 0,0:11:43.64, |
Plus, he has a quota for the amount of |
| |
再说了 关于印度仆人的玩笑 |
| 0,0:11:45.69, |
Indian servant jokes he can tolerate, |
| |
他的容忍是有限的 |
| 0,0:11:47.56, |
and, apparently, I filled it. |
| |
而我貌似已经把额度用完了 |
| 0,0:11:49.66, |
Well, you're... I can get the baby. |
| |
你歇着吧 我可以去哄她 |
| 0,0:11:51.54, |
No, Howie's got it. He's fine. |
| |
不用了 华仔可以的 他能行 |
| 0,0:11:53.29, |
Right, Howie? |
| |
对吧 华仔 |
| 0,0:11:54.23, |
Never better. |
| |
比什么时候都行 |
| 0,0:11:56.11, |
Don't be silly. |
| |
别傻了 |
| 0,0:11:57.37, |
I'll take the rest of the day off and watch Halley for you. |
| |
我可以请假帮你们照看哈雷 |
| 0,0:12:00.20, |
Or we can call Stuart. |
| |
或者我们可以打给斯图尔特 |
| 0,0:12:01.81, |
I'm sure he could close up the store, |
| |
我敢说他肯定会马上关店 |
| 0,0:12:03.19, |
hop on a bus, and be here in no time. |
| |
跳上公交车 飞奔来这里 |
| 0,0:12:05.47, |
He does love the bus. |
| |
他的确很爱公交车 |
| 0,0:12:08.70, |
Okay, hang on. |
| |
等下 |
| 0,0:12:09.60, |
Do you guys not trust me to take care of your baby? |
| |
你俩是不相信我可以照看好你们的娃吗 |
| 0,0:12:14.80, |
No.-No. |
| |
不是-真不是 |
| 0,0:12:16.34, |
So I-I guess... |
| |
我觉得还是... |
| 0,0:12:18.44, |
no. |
| |
不行 |
| 0,0:12:22.32, |
It's not that we don't trust you-- it's just... |
| |
不是我们不信任你 只是... |
| 0,0:12:24.23, |
you don't seem like much of a baby person. |
| |
你看起来不太像是喜欢小娃娃的人 |
| 0,0:12:27.63, |
I can watch your stupid baby, okay? |
| |
我能照看好你们的傻逼娃娃 好吗 |
| 0,0:12:31.83, |
If she cries, I will pick her up. |
| |
如果她哭了 我会抱她起来 |
| 0,0:12:33.90, |
If she's hungry, I'll give her a bottle. |
| |
如果她饿了 我会给她热奶 |
| 0,0:12:35.91, |
And if she poops, I'll light some incense. |
| |
如果她拉粑粑了 我会点上熏香 |
| 0,0:12:39.83, |
It would be a big help. |
| |
那可真是帮了大忙了 |
| 0,0:12:41.42, |
Okay. Thank you. |
| |
好吧 谢谢你 |
| 0,0:12:42.75, |
Trust me, you guys have nothing to worry about. |
| |
相信我 你们俩绝对可以放一百个心 |
| 0,0:12:45.14, |
You know, back in Nebraska, |
| |
当年在我们老家 |
| 0,0:12:46.36, |
I raised all our baby pigs |
| |
我们家的小猪仔 |
| 0,0:12:47.65, |
right until the day they were slaughtered. |
| |
都是我一手养大到可以送去宰了 |
| 0,0:12:49.48, |
So, unless your baby's made of breakfast meat, |
| |
所以除非你们娃是早餐肉做的 |
| 0,0:12:52.56, |
she's fine. |
| |
否则她好着呢 |
| 0,0:12:56.73, |
Would you ever get a vasectomy? |
| |
你有天会去做结扎手术吗 |
| 0,0:12:58.42, |
Uh, in case you haven't noticed, |
| |
或许你没有注意到 |
| 0,0:13:00.19, |
Indians aren't too big on birth control. |
| |
印度人不是很喜欢计划生育 |
| 0,0:13:03.52, |
There's probably, like, a million more of us |
| |
很可能从我们开始这话题到现在 |
| 0,0:13:04.88, |
since we started this conversation. |
| |
印度又多了一百万人口 |
| 0,0:13:10.26, |
You okay? |
| |
你还好吧 |
| 0,0:13:11.20, |
No. |
| |
不好 |
| 0,0:13:12.11, |
No, all these comments online about Wil, |
| |
网上所有关于威尔的评论 |
| 0,0:13:14.61, |
they're nothing but supportive and kind. |
| |
一水儿全是支持和好话 |
| 0,0:13:17.81, |
Where's the mean, snarky Internet |
| |
那个毒舌刻薄的互联网哪去了 |
| 0,0:13:19.29, |
that shows up every time I get a haircut? |
| |
怎么每次我剪完头发它就出现呢 |
| 0,0:13:23.14, |
You know that's us, right? |
| |
你知道毒舌刻薄的是我们 对吧 |
| 0,0:13:28.36, |
Well, luckily, I got the number of the company |
| |
幸运的是 我搞到了那家 |
| 0,0:13:30.65, |
who's trying to reboot the show, |
| |
试图重启这节目公司的电话 |
| 0,0:13:32.00, |
so I need you all to call and register your displeasure. |
| |
所以我需要你们都打去表达你们的不满 |
| 0,0:13:34.78, |
Sheldon, no one's gonna do that. |
| |
谢尔顿 没人会这么做 |
| 0,0:13:36.13, |
Not true. |
| |
有哦 |
| 0,0:13:36.87, |
I know of three calls they've received already: |
| |
我知道已经有三个人打去表达不满了 |
| 0,0:13:38.97, |
a-a Southern gentleman, |
| |
一位是南方绅士 |
| 0,0:13:40.52, |
um, a Cockney chimney sweep, |
| |
一位是伦敦烟囱清扫工 |
| 0,0:13:43.44, |
and, uh, |
| |
还有一位是 |
| 0,0:13:44.25, |
Mr. T, hmm? |
| |
T先生 |
| 0,0:13:46.52, |
Who-- spoiler alert-- |
| |
这位先生 剧透一下 |
| 0,0:13:47.99, |
pities the fool who tries to reboot that show. |
| |
可怜那位试图重启这节目的傻瓜 |
| 0,0:13:51.35, |
What about tiresome lunatic with a bad haircut? |
| |
那个发型糟糕的无聊疯子呢 |
| 0,0:13:53.49, |
Has he called yet? |
| |
他怎么没打去 |
| 0,0:13:55.70, |
Come on. |
| |
拜托 |
| 0,0:13:56.52, |
How many times have we banded together |
| |
多少次我们团结起来 |
| 0,0:13:58.27, |
to try to save a show that we loved? |
| |
一起去拯救我们热爱的节目 |
| 0,0:13:59.94, |
L-Let's shake things up and try to kill one. |
| |
这次我们改变套路 把这节目扼杀在摇篮中 |
| 0,0:14:03.65, |
Isn't the important thing that there's a show |
| |
有个能让孩子喜欢科学的节目 |
| 0,0:14:05.51, |
to get kids excited about science? |
| |
难道不重要吗 |
| 0,0:14:07.68, |
Who cares about kids and what they like? |
| |
谁在乎小孩和他们喜欢什么啊 |
| 0,0:14:10.34, |
This is about me |
| |
这事关我 |
| 0,0:14:11.42, |
and something I liked when-when I was a kid. |
| |
和我还是个孩子时喜欢的节目 |
| 0,0:14:16.06, |
What if the reboot is great? |
| |
万一节目重启很成功呢 |
| 0,0:14:17.97, |
That's even worse. |
| |
那就更糟了 |
| 0,0:14:19.21, |
If-if I like it, |
| |
如果我喜欢它 |
| 0,0:14:20.20, |
I'll feel like I'm being disloyal to Arthur. |
| |
感觉就像背叛了亚瑟 |
| 0,0:14:22.37, |
He was a mentor and a friend, |
| |
他是我的导师和朋友 |
| 0,0:14:24.52, |
and I won't toss him aside for some Hollywood pretty boy |
| |
我不会为了好莱坞某个帅哥 比如威尔·惠顿 |
| 0,0:14:27.25, |
like Wil Wheaton. |
| |
而抛弃他 |
| 0,0:14:29.98, |
It's hard to argue with him. |
| |
他的话很难反驳啊 |
| 0,0:14:31.20, |
Because he makes no sense? Yeah. |
| |
因为他根本不讲理吗 的确是 |
| 0,0:14:36.02, |
This is actually kind of nice, |
| |
这感觉其实挺好的 |
| 0,0:14:37.67, |
you and me getting to spend a couple days in bed together. |
| |
你我有机会一起在床上赖几天 |
| 0,0:14:40.93, |
Yeah. Pretty soon, we're gonna have |
| |
是啊 很快我们家 |
| 0,0:14:42.26, |
two crying babies in the house. |
| |
就会有两个哇哇叫的宝宝了 |
| 0,0:14:44.96, |
I'm glad my balls hurt. It's all their fault. |
| |
我很高兴我蛋疼 因为全是它们的错 |
| 0,0:14:50.38, |
Well, let's just enjoy this quiet time |
| |
让我们一起享受这宁静的时光 |
| 0,0:14:52.17, |
while we still got it. |
| |
趁现在还有机会 |
| 0,0:14:53.42, |
Yeah. |
| |
是啊 |
| 0,0:14:56.57, |
Yeah, it is really quiet. |
| |
但这也太安静了吧 |
| 0,0:14:59.34, |
You think Penny's doing okay? |
| |
你觉得佩妮能应付得来吗 |
| 0,0:15:01.89, |
Penny, everything all right?! |
| |
佩妮 一切还好吗 |
| 0,0:15:07.08, |
Hey. All good. |
| |
一切都好 |
| 0,0:15:07.81, |
Dipped her pacifier in a little bourbon, she conked right out. |
| |
往她奶嘴上沾了点酒 她立马昏睡过去了 |
| 0,0:15:13.56, |
I hope you're joking. |
| |
希望你是在开玩笑 |
| 0,0:15:14.87, |
Of course I'm joking. I don't share my bourbon. |
| |
当然是开玩笑啊 我才不会分享我的酒呢 |
| 0,0:15:20.10, |
She's joking. |
| |
她在开玩笑 |
| 0,0:15:22.28, |
Definitely. |
| |
肯定是 |
| 0,0:15:24.48, |
Probably. |
| |
应该吧 |
| 0,0:15:29.56, |
Wil Wheaton. Wil Wheaton. |
| |
威尔·惠顿 威尔·惠顿 |
| 0,0:15:32.69, |
This is Sheldon, by the way. |
| |
对了 我是谢尔顿 |
| 0,0:15:37.22, |
Hi, Sheldon. |
| |
谢尔顿 |
| 0,0:15:38.44, |
Here, I found this pizza flyer in your fence. |
| |
给 我在你的栅栏发现这张披萨传单 |
| 0,0:15:41.92, |
Thank you. |
| |
谢谢 |
| 0,0:15:42.87, |
Okay, now you owe me a favor. |
| |
现在你欠我个人情 |
| 0,0:15:46.12, |
Turn down the role of Professor Proton. |
| |
你去拒演质子教授 |
| 0,0:15:48.90, |
I don't think so. |
| |
我不同意 |
| 0,0:15:50.38, |
You can't be Professor Proton. You're not a scientist. |
| |
你不能当质子教授 你又不是科学家 |
| 0,0:15:53.53, |
Well, I was never on a starship, |
| |
我也从没上过太空星舰 |
| 0,0:15:54.97, |
but pretending I was bought me this house. |
| |
但假装自己上过让我买下了这栋房子 |
| 0,0:15:57.62, |
And if I'd pretended a little longer, |
| |
要是我假装的时间更久 |
| 0,0:15:59.26, |
it would have a swimming pool. |
| |
还能买下带泳池的房子呢 |
| 0,0:16:02.09, |
Some things shouldn't be rebooted. |
| |
有些东西就不该被重启 |
| 0,0:16:03.94, |
Some things were perfect the way they were. |
| |
有些东西本来就很完美了 |
| 0,0:16:05.80, |
Like the walled city of York-- it was a delight. |
| |
比如有城墙的约克 非常美好 |
| 0,0:16:08.80, |
But New York? Blech. |
| |
但新约克[纽约] 算了吧 |
| 0,0:16:11.55, |
Did you ever consider that maybe Arthur would be happy to know |
| |
你有没想过 如果亚瑟得知他的节目比他还长寿 |
| 0,0:16:14.68, |
that his show has outlived him? |
| |
会很高兴呢 |
| 0,0:16:16.62, |
I doubt it. |
| |
我深表怀疑 |
| 0,0:16:17.42, |
He was kind of a mean old crank. |
| |
他是个刻薄暴躁的臭老头 |
| 0,0:16:20.75, |
Sheldon, I promise that I will work my hardest to make this show great |
| |
谢尔顿 我保证我会努力把节目做好 |
| 0,0:16:25.48, |
so that a whole new generation of kids |
| |
好让新一代的孩子们 |
| 0,0:16:27.01, |
will grow up and they will be able to say |
| |
长大后会说 |
| 0,0:16:28.97, |
that Professor Proton was the reason they got into science. |
| |
是质子教授让他们投身科学领域 |
| 0,0:16:35.39, |
That was very persuasive. |
| |
这番话很有说服力 |
| 0,0:16:37.67, |
Thanks. |
| |
谢谢 |
| 0,0:16:38.81, |
But I won't be seduced by your acting skills |
| |
但我不会被你的演技 |
| 0,0:16:40.85, |
nor your movie star charisma. |
| |
或电影明星魅力所诱惑 |
| 0,0:16:45.07, |
There's only one Professor Proton, |
| |
质子教授只有一个 |
| 0,0:16:46.62, |
and he had neither of those things. |
| |
而他绝没有上述两种特质 |
| 0,0:16:49.39, |
I'll give you one more chance to bow out. |
| |
我再给你一次机会退出 |
| 0,0:16:52.65, |
Or what? |
| |
不然怎样 |
| 0,0:16:55.79, |
When we first met, we were enemies, |
| |
我们初次见面时 你我是敌人 |
| 0,0:16:57.94, |
but we worked through that and we became friends. |
| |
但我们解决了矛盾 成为了朋友 |
| 0,0:17:01.43, |
Do you really want to go back? |
| |
你真想回到当初吗 |
| 0,0:17:03.61, |
Honestly, it doesn't feel very different. |
| |
老实说 感觉没什么不同 |
| 0,0:17:10.17, |
I'm not leaving! |
| |
我不会走的 |
| 0,0:17:11.62, |
All right, I'm gonna sic my dog on you. |
| |
好吧 那我就放狗出来咬你 |
| 0,0:17:15.03, |
You don't have a dog. |
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你又没有养狗 |
| 0,0:17:16.73, |
Yes, I do. |
| |
有的 |
| 0,0:17:19.08, |
Ugh, I can't tell if you're lying-- |
| |
我分辨不出你是否在说谎 |
| 0,0:17:20.33, |
you're such a good actor! |
| |
你演技太高超了 |
| 0,0:17:26.32, |
Hey, how you doing? |
| |
你好吗 |
| 0,0:17:27.77, |
What are you doing here? |
| |
你怎么来了 |
| 0,0:17:29.58, |
Oh, I just came by, you know, |
| |
我就顺路过来看看 |
| 0,0:17:31.84, |
to see if you need any help. |
| |
看你是否需要帮忙 |
| 0,0:17:34.43, |
Howard and Bernadette asked you to check up on me. |
| |
霍华德和伯纳黛特派你来监督我 |
| 0,0:17:36.33, |
That is not entirely true. |
| |
这话不全对 |
| 0,0:17:38.62, |
So did Leonard and... everybody. |
| |
还有莱纳德和 所有人 |
| 0,0:17:42.31, |
How irresponsible do you all think I am? |
| |
你们是觉得我有多不负责任啊 |
| 0,0:17:44.67, |
We don't think you're irresponsible. |
| |
我们不觉得你不负责任啊 |
| 0,0:17:46.87, |
We think you're... |
| |
我们只是觉得你... |
| 0,0:17:48.87, |
fun-loving. |
| |
喜爱玩耍 |
| 0,0:17:51.27, |
That is just a nice word for "Irresponsible." |
| |
这只是"不负责任"好听一点的说法 |
| 0,0:17:54.62, |
You might be more on the ball than we thought. |
| |
看来你比我们想的要机智 |
| 0,0:18:00.35, |
I'm getting a little hungry. |
| |
我有点饿了 |
| 0,0:18:01.96, |
Want me to get it this time? |
| |
这次我来吧 |
| 0,0:18:03.32, |
That'd be great. |
| |
那再好不过了 |
| 0,0:18:08.92, |
This is fun. |
| |
真好玩 |
| 0,0:18:10.21, |
And now you also get to see an annoyed blonde walk into the room. |
| |
你也能看到一个气鼓鼓的金发妞走进来 |
| 0,0:18:15.31, |
What? |
| |
干嘛 |
| 0,0:18:17.79, |
Can you get us a little snack? |
| |
能给我们拿点零食吗 |
| 0,0:18:19.25, |
You sure you don't want your spy to do it? |
| |
不叫你们的间谍去拿吗 |
| 0,0:18:22.03, |
What are you talking about? |
| |
你在说什么呢 |
| 0,0:18:23.14, |
You really don't trust me? You had to have Amy stop by? |
| |
你们真的很不信任我 还让艾米过来看看 |
| 0,0:18:26.03, |
- We trust you. - Yeah. |
| |
我们信任你-是啊 |
| 0,0:18:27.86, |
You were a terrible waitress, |
| |
你是个糟糕的服务员 |
| 0,0:18:29.28, |
and we still asked you to get us a snack. |
| |
我们还是叫你给我们拿零食了啊 |
| 0,0:18:35.16, |
Excuse me while I go take care of your baby. |
| |
失陪一下 我要去照顾你们的宝宝 |
| 0,0:18:37.22, |
Then I'll bring you your snack, |
| |
然后我会拿零食给你们 |
| 0,0:18:38.33, |
and you can insult me some more. |
| |
到时你们就可以继续羞辱我了 |
| 0,0:18:42.00, |
I don't know about you, |
| |
不知道你怎么想 |
| 0,0:18:42.87, |
but I am not eating whatever she brings us. |
| |
但我绝对不会吃她送来的食物 |
| 0,0:18:47.87, |
Hey, Halley. Aw, it's okay. |
| |
哈雷 没事的 |
| 0,0:18:49.55, |
Auntie Penny's here. Shh. Let's get you changed. |
| |
佩妮阿姨来了 我帮你换尿布 |
| 0,0:18:53.42, |
Your mommy and daddy say they trust me, |
| |
你爸妈说他们相信我 |
| 0,0:18:55.14, |
but they're full of the same stuff your diaper is. |
| |
但他们满嘴都是你尿布里现在包着的东西 |
| 0,0:18:59.89, |
Now I feel bad. |
| |
这下我内疚了 |
| 0,0:19:01.40, |
Well, she never really liked me. |
| |
反正她从没喜欢过我 |
| 0,0:19:03.43, |
It's kind of nice she hates you now, too. |
| |
现在她也讨厌你 感觉还不赖 |
| 0,0:19:06.30, |
Aw, but I'm here for you, |
| |
但你有我呢 |
| 0,0:19:07.84, |
and I would never let anything happen to you, |
| |
我不会让你受到任何伤害 |
| 0,0:19:09.70, |
because your Auntie Penny loves you so much. |
| |
因为佩妮阿姨真的好爱好爱你 |
| 0,0:19:13.11, |
Mama. |
| |
妈妈 |
| 0,0:19:22.07, |
Was that her first word? |
| |
那是她第一个词吗 |
| 0,0:19:23.32, |
Mama. |
| |
妈妈 |
| 0,0:19:26.52, |
Uh, no. No, baby. I'm not your mama. |
| |
不不 宝宝 我不是你妈妈 |
| 0,0:19:29.14, |
Your mama's the nice lady we're gonna go see right now |
| |
你妈妈是我们现在要去见的那位善良女士 |
| 0,0:19:31.70, |
so I can rub this in her face. |
| |
这样我就能在她面前嘚瑟啦 |
| 0,0:19:35.49, |
Do you hear that, suckers? |
| |
听见了吗 你俩贱人 |
| 0,0:19:36.76, |
She called me Mama! |
| |
她叫我妈妈 |
| 0,0:19:53.41, |
Hello, Arthur. |
| |
你好 亚瑟 |
| 0,0:19:55.39, |
You-you know, |
| |
你知道 |
| 0,0:19:57.97, |
we could... we could also meet in-in a deli. |
| |
我们 我们也可以在熟食店见面的 |
| 0,0:20:05.12, |
I'm sorry to say that I failed you. |
| |
很抱歉告诉你 我辜负了你 |
| 0,0:20:07.39, |
I tried to stop Wil Wheaton being Professor Proton, |
| |
我试过阻止威尔·惠顿出演质子教授 |
| 0,0:20:10.08, |
but I couldn't. |
| |
但我没能做到 |
| 0,0:20:12.16, |
See, now, that's-that's the kind of thing |
| |
知道吗 这种事情 |
| 0,0:20:14.99, |
you could tell a fella over a... |
| |
很适合边吃熏牛肉三明治 |
| 0,0:20:19.14, |
pastrami sandwich. |
| |
边告诉对方的 |
| 0,0:20:25.59, |
Well, don't worry. |
| |
别担心 |
| 0,0:20:27.11, |
He's now on my enemies list forever. |
| |
现在他会永远在我的仇家名单里 |
| 0,0:20:29.66, |
He's totally cut off. |
| |
我跟他永世绝交 |
| 0,0:20:31.78, |
Interesting. |
| |
有意思 |
| 0,0:20:33.14, |
Can-can anyone sign-sign up for that list? |
| |
其他人能去哪登记上那份名单呢 |
