- 你的咖啡- 谢谢.瑞秋，有空要不要一起去看电影...以情侣的身份！太明显了..或者改天一起去吃饭...以情侣的身份！- 嗨！- 嗨！好，买东西去走之前我有话要说哦，好的我很喜欢你以前有罗斯，我不方便行动既然你们分手了，我想约你出去所以，我现在就是在...约你我掉了一个杯子再过几年，语音辨别系统将成为电脑的基本配备你可以说“去洗车”、“去打扫房间”电脑办不到，但是听得懂- 好棒哦- 是啊就这样吧再见嗨，不住在这里的人- 嗨！- 你好！备用钥匙是有急事时才用的我们没有 Doritos 玉米片了跟百万富翁的约会如何？ “百万富翁先生”最新玩具组合三老婆单独发售他很棒，我们在一起很开心他风趣又体贴而我对他没兴趣- 还是没兴趣？- 不～我快疯了，他各方面都很完美什么都好，而且什么都有是的，他真的什么都有！有真人大小的“星际大战”人物模型吗？两套！哇～乔伊和我可以拿来对打吗？老妈，老爸，我是超级坏小子老妈，老爸，我是超级坏小子他一定接到那个舞台剧了或正如葛萝莉亚.伊丝特芬所唱人迟早会随节奏起舞- 乔，你好吗？- 很好- 嘿！- 嗨那么，你演爱莉安咯？对，你演智障堂哥？不是，我演你的丈夫维克我是乔伊.崔比亚尼很高兴认识你，凯特.米勒这个剧本很棒吧？是啊，我好喜欢珍妮佛.班.贝利的作品她尤其能精确的解构中产阶级废话那么多，总之她特厉害我在哪里见过你？拉莫瑞医生？ “我们的岁月”？“少女杂志”票选为最想跟他约会的神经外科医生不是那个原来你是连续剧演员能演出舞台剧，你一定很兴奋咯我也演过舞台剧我是专业演员那个公益广告－ 倒盒装牛奶的那个－你是..那个不会倒牛奶的人我会倒牛奶，我把你骗倒了这就是演技你还被饼干噎到了哦，那是真的不敢相信，马克居然约你出去- 是啊- 你要怎么回答？我说我会考虑，但是我会拒绝我目前不想约会好奇怪，这样一个...迷人、英俊的男人约我出去而且我也可以去但我却有罪恶感仿佛那样是背叛罗斯的也许这代表，你还没忘情罗斯而且还有父女问题我没有父女问题那就是罗斯的问题了我恨这个女人，我恨她！她到处宣扬公益广告的事现在大家都跑来找我开饮料每次我打不开，他们就..就笑我- 你好- 嘿！瑞秋打电话来说想见我我待会就要过去你觉得她有什么事么？也许她茅塞顿开，发现没有我的人生..是黑白的有可能，你很可爱要是我跟你分手，也会想你的我只是想表达支持那么，就以男人的方式来表达要是我跟你分手，也会想念你- 嗨.- 嗨？！你找我？是的这一盒是你的东西什么？！就是帽子、衣服、CD、一些你留在这里的东西你想干什么？想伤害我吗？不是罗斯，只是..我只是觉得我们应该往前走了你不同意吗？- 同意啊 - 那就好是的，我真的同意这是我送你的罗斯，那是博物馆礼品部的赠品一样是礼物我是从“礼品部”拿到的好，给我，我留着就是了不必假好心，既然如此..我的其他东西呢？像...嘿！，这本书是我的你当成睡衣穿的T恤呢？我要拿回来你明知我很喜欢那件衣服的你根本没在穿！我是在帮你往前走哦，你真小气- 小气...- 小气...- 小心眼... - 小心眼...你是故意要气我的我会一直穿着，我爱这件衣服你15岁后就没穿过了根本塞不下- 哦？是吗－是吗－是吗...- 是的，是的，是的！好吧不好意思，我要把东西拿走了然后穿着我最爱的衣服去放松一下祝你今晚愉快那么，你是亿兆富翁却跟我们差不多大你知道么？你应该买下一个州然后取你自己的名字比如彼特科塔或是密西西彼特我知道了：彼芝加哥芝加哥不是州，乔哦，密西西彼特是咯？我该走了改天见- 好的- 你跟我们差不多大- 明天见？- 好的！快走吧我快要没地方可以摸了我有毛病么？我为何总是喜欢没有未来的人？不是太老，就是太小彼特这么喜欢我而且这么完美，我们又合得来我是不是有什么毛病？好像是我应该感到开心吗？是吗？不如你来告诉我因为我实在搞不懂我们的交谈没有感情你看着我的眼神没有感情一点都没有有意思我开始觉得你们有渊源了，很好- 我对这场戏有个疑问- 怎样？爱莉安为什么会喜欢维克？抽丝剥茧第一，他很帅我的角色需要更好的理由我知道，因为剧本这么写我也不知道维克为什么喜欢你剧本上说你是个贱人- 剧本上没写- 我这本有我吹干，上发胶，还是一样还是有一撮..像是被牛舔过的头发，烦死了 - 你看了烦不烦？- 你比较烦你会不会刚好没看到？罗斯，别再看了！你不能在哪里瞄上三小时你会得偷窥眼的我就知道，我就知道她喜欢他 她一直否认，结果呢我们才刚分手，她就变卦了- 你们没有“才刚分手”- 嘿～才三个星期你不到三小时就跟别人上床了连子弹都没这么快他们回来了...哦，我发誓，要是她跟他吻别，我会自杀的我看不下去了约会该结束了！该结束了！没事，她要进去了- 哦- 她要进去了等等！他也要进去了！他进去了！门关了门关着我什么都看不到门的发明者可以安息了我得想办法阻止- 阻止什么？！- 我不知道！ 但只要我过去就是了我要过去借东西..果汁！我要果汁！不行！一定要阻止他们我是你的朋友我不会让你这么做的你还真强壮我要喝果汁！人都要喝果汁！- 看啊，伙计- 人都要喝果汁- 听我说- 果汁！我要喝...她往前走了就算不是他，也会有别人除非你打算租下这个窥孔否则你就得面对分手的事实好么？结束了- 好吧- 好我真的很想她我知道咖啡杯为什么都有编号？这样莫尼卡才方便追踪要是少了一个她就可以说“27号杯子呢？”- 你知道吗？- 不知道，也不想知道- 我办不到- 我就是不想知道这件事马克，我的出发点是错的我只是想报复罗斯对不起，这样对你不公平去他的公平！你想报复罗斯，尽管找我 真的，我们就在这张沙发上报复他吧天哪很抱歉没关系- 你确定？- 是的 我可以回去自己报复他将成为21世纪的盘尼西林 所以今天，本院将朝领导改革跨出一大步问你一件事目前是什么状况？ 嗯，有这么多医生、护士在场应该是小型马术表演跟我说实话好吧我应该没有告诉你 我刚结束一段很认真的感情哦，一年前对吧？原来我说过了其实不是这个原因 我目前想把注意力放在自己身上- 你懂吗？- 哦，我懂- 我也想对你有兴趣- 但是你没有，好对不起不必抱歉真的，没有那么糟- 真的？- 我又不是John Bon Jovi, 或是什么有魅力的人我只是觉得...你的感觉或许会变你别误会但是以被拒绝的人来说你还真有自信傻得很可爱吧？要不要去吃饭？这里蛮令人沮丧的我们欢迎幕后功臣，彼特贝克先生等一下一山不容二虎，一臣不事二主拔枪！我什么也没做！她又怎么了？她在耶鲁念戏剧，就自以为比...切片吐司厉害哦，切片吐司 她的麦克白夫人是一绝天！我恨她，我恨她的 “我好有才华”、“我好漂亮”、“我好香”有某人喜欢上某人咯嘿！请专心讨论我的问题好吗？我就是说你，猪头！哦..少来喂，这两天你开口闭口都是她要是在学校里，你已经在拉她的辫子、推她了那为什么我老是想着要用各种姿势跟她“嘿咻”？我应该感到开心，是吗？不如你来告诉我，嗯？因为我实在搞不懂我们的交谈没有感情 你看着我的眼神没有感情一点都没有你们让我乐翻天了 乐死了！明天再继续排刚才...- 好多了？- 是的的确有进步再见- 凯特 - 嗯？你忘了拿鞋子不穿鞋子恐怕不行凯特..要不要去喝杯咖啡？- 凯特- 哎- 可以走了吗？- 是的很好，非常好 那么... - 明天见- 好 晚安嘿！为什么没有蜘蛛曼？像是金曼、席维曼因为那不是他的姓- 不是吗？- 他又不叫... 菲尔蜘蛛曼他是个蜘蛛..人 你想..像金曼是姓氏，但是没有金人好啦..应该有金人的- 嘿！ - 好，瑞秋工作顺利吗？很好，只是我不小心摔到地上了对了，罗斯拿了一盒你的东西来意料中事直接扔掉吧还不是洗发精...怎么了？没..没事那么，金人有什么超能力？他能把东西变成金子- 已经是金子的东西呢？- 那他的动作完成了咯- 来玩我的游戏- 好你这个中看不中用的...拔枪！好玩！
The One With The Tiny T-shirt
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is pouring Rachel coffee.]
Gunther: Here you go.
Rachel: Thank you.
Gunther: (In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if you抎 like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe you抎 just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.
Mark: (entering) Hi!
Rachel: Hi! All right, let抯 go shoppin?!
Mark: Um, y'know, before we go ah, there抯 something I need to say.
Rachel: Oh, okay.
Mark: I抳e kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didn抰 do anything about it. But, now that you抮e not, I抎 really like to ask you out sometime. So-so that抯-that抯 what I抦 doing, now.
(Gunther gets this hurt expression on his face and goes into the back room)
Rachel: Wow! Umm....
(She抯 interrupted by a loud crash and the sound of braking dishes. Followed quickly by another crash. Everyone turns and looks at the back room, as Gunther emerges.)
Gunther: I dropped a cup.
[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments, Pete and Monica are returning from their date.]
Pete: ...so y'know, that抯 why, within a few years, that voice recognition is gonna be pretty much standard on any computer you buy. Y'know, so you could be like-like, 慦ash my car.?慍lean my room.? It抯 not gonna be able to do any of those things, but it抣l understand what you抮e saying.
Monica: Oh, this is so great.
Pete: Yeah, it was.
Monica: All right then. (He leans in to kiss her goodnight, but she quickly kisses him on the cheek and pats his shoulder.) Bye.
(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)
Monica: Hello, people who do not live here.
All: Hi! Hello!
Monica: I gave you a key for emergencies!
Phoebe: We were out of Doritos.
Ross: Hey, how抎 the date go with Mr. Millionaire?
Chandler: Mr. Millionaire, new from Snooty Playthings! Third wife sold separately.
Monica: He抯 great! I mean we have such a good time together! He抯 so funny, and sooo sweet, and I抦 not attracted to him at all!!
Monica: Noo!! It抯 driving me crazy. I mean every other way he抯 like the perfect guy, he has everything. Plus! He actually has everything.
Chandler: Life-sized Imperial Storm Troopers from Sharper Image?
Chandler: Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?
Joey: (entering, dancing and singing) Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! (He dances around the dinner table and exits)
Ross: I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.
Monica and Phoebe: Oh.
Chandler: Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythm is going to get you.
[Scene: A Theatre, Joey is arriving to rehearse the play he抯 in.]
The Director: Joe. How抯 it going?
Joey: Good. (He sets his stuff down and starts talking to Kate, another cast member.) Hey.
Joey: Oh, so you抮e playing Adrienne, huh?
Kate: Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?
Joey: Oh, no. Ah, I playing your husband, Victor. I抦 Joey Tribianni.
Kate: Hi, nice to meet you. Kate Miller.
(She goes over to the snack table, and Joey quickly runs over and pours her a cup of coffee.)
Joey: So the ah, play抯 pretty great, huh?
Kate: Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murray抯 work. She抯 so brilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middle class.
Joey: Oh, forget about it. She rocks!
Kate: Where do I know you from?
Joey: Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datable neurosurgeon by Teen Beat.
Kate: No, that抯 not it. So, you抮e a soap actor? Well this must be pretty exciting for you to be in a real play, hmm?
Joey: Hey, I抳e done plays before. I抦 a serious actor.
Kate: That info-mercial! For the milk carton spout thing! You抮e-you抮e-you抮e the guy that doesn抰 know how to pour milk!!
Joey: See, I actually can pour milk, but I got you believing that I couldn抰. Now, see, that抯 acting.
Kate: Right, at the end, you choked on a cookie.
Joey: Yeah, that was real.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is telling Phoebe about Mark, as Gunther eavesdrops behind them.]
Phoebe: Wow! I cannot believe Mark asked you out.
Rachel: I know.
Phoebe: What, so what are you gonna tell him?
Rachel: Well, I told him I would think about it, but I抦 gonna tell him no.
(Gunther tries to swoop in to ask Rachel out.)
Rachel: I mean I think I抎 say no to anybody right now. (Hearing this Gunther swoops back to cleaning tables.) Oh, but it was so strange. I mean I抦 standing there with this charming, cute guy, who抯 asking me to go out with him, which I抦 allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Y'know, like I抎 be cheating on Ross or something.
Phoebe: Wow. So, okay, maybe that means that, you抮e not over Ross yet and you have issues with your father.
Rachel: I don抰 have any issues with my Father.
Phoebe: Okay, so it抯 probably just the Ross thing then.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is telling Chandler about Kate.]
Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I can抰 do it, they抮e all like-like laughing at me.
Ross: (entering) Hello.
Chandler and Joey: Hey!
Ross: So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.
Joey: Wow, what-what do you think she wants?
Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me.... a-sucks.
Chandler: It抯 possible. You are very loveable, I抎 miss you if I broke up with you. (Ross glares at him) I was just trying to be supportive.
Ross: Then be supportive like a guy.
Chandler: (in a deep voice) If I broke up with you, I抎 miss you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as Ross enters, walking very confidently.]
Ross: You ah, wanted to see me?
Rachel: Yeah. Ahh, here抯 a box of your stuff. (hands him a box)
Rachel: Oh, y'know, it抯 just like hats, and a shirt, and CD抯, just sort of stuff that you抳e left here.
Ross: What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me? Or something?
Rachel: No. Ross, it, it just seems that y'know it抯 time we-we y'know, move on. I mean, I mean don抰?you think?
Ross: Yes, I do.
Ross: Yeah, I-I really do. (takes a dinosaur mug out of the box) Hey! This-this was a gift?!
Rachel: Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop.
Ross: It抯 still a gift! I got it from the gift shop!
Rachel: Okay, all right, give me the mug! I抣l keep the mug.
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know don抰 do me any favours. In fact, where, where抯 the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? I抎 like that back too. Yes, I do.
Rachel: You know how much I love that T-shirt! You never even where that T-shirt!
Ross: I抦 just trying to help you, move on.
Rachel: Oh, you are a petty man. You are a petty, petty....
Rachel: Petty... (goes into her room)
Ross: Small... (Rachel comes back into the living room and catches Ross mocking her.)
Rachel: You are so just doing this out of spite.
Ross: Awwwahuh, no, no, no!!
Ross: I抦-I抦 gonna wear this all the time! I love this shirt!! (he kisses the shirt)
Rachel: You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15!! It doesn抰 even fit you anymore!
Ross: Oh, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah...
Rachel: (imitating him) yeah-yeah-yeah!!
Ross: Oh-oh, okay, okay! (He quickly takes off his sweater in order to put on the T-shirt. It抯 an old 慒rankie says relax?T-shirt, that barely fits him. Rachel nods her head in approval of the new look.) If you don抰 mind I抦 gonna the rest of my stuff, and relax, in my favourite shirt. (Starts to leave) You have a pleasant evening. (He exits and leaves the door open.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang minus Rachel and Ross are talking to Pete.]
Phoebe: So, you抮e like a zillionaire? (Pete smiles and nods)
Chandler: And you抮e our age. You抮e our age.
Phoebe: Y'know what, you should like, you should buy a state and then just name it after yourself.
Pete: What like Pete Dakota?
Phoebe: Yeah, or, or, or, Mississ-Pete.
Joey: Oh, oh, I got it! Pete-Chicago.
Chandler: That抯 not a state Joe.
Joey: Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?
Pete: I got to go, so ah, I抣l see you guys later.
Chandler: You抮e our age!
Pete: (to Monica, by the door) So ah, we on for tomorrow?
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, I抦 running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where there抯 no future? Either they抮e too old, or they抮e too young, and then there抯 Pete who抯-who抯 crazy about me, and who抯 absolutely perfect for me, and there抯 like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like something抯 wrong with me?!
Phoebe: Yeah, kinda.
[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are rehearsing for the play.]
Kate: Happy?! Is that what I抦 supposed to be Vic? Happy?
Joey: Well, why don抰 you tell me what you抮e supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell can抰 figure it out! I talk to you and nothin? You look at me, and it抯 nothin? (He kisses her) Nothing.
The Director: Tasty! I抦 really starting to feel like you guys have a history, it抯-it抯 nice.
Kate: I have a question about this scene.
The Director: Yes?
Kate: Well, I don抰 understand why Adrienne抯 attracted to Victor.
The Director: Peel the onion. First of all, he抯 good looking.
Kate: I think my character抯 gonna need a little bit more of reason than that.
Joey: Oh, hey, how about this one. Ah, it抯 says so in the script! Y'know ah, I-I don抰 know why my character likes you either, I mean it says in the script here that you抮e a bitch.
Kate: It doesn抰 say that in the script.
Joey: It does in mine!
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]
Chandler: I can blow dry it. I can put gel on it. It doesn抰 matter, I still wind up with this little (pats the flat spot on the back of his head) cowlicky thing on the middle part of my head. It抯 so annoying. Does it bug you?
Ross: You bug me.
[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]
Chandler: Is there any chance you didn抰 see that?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching a basketball game, Ross is staring out the peephole.]
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You can抰 just stare through the peep hole for three hours! You抮e gonna get peep eye!
Ross: I knew it! I knew it! I always knew she liked him! Y'know, she抎 say no, but here we are! Right? We just broke up, first thing she does!
Chandler: You didn抰 just break up.
Ross: Hey, it抯 been like three weeks!
Chandler: You slept with somebody three hours after you thought you broke up. I mean bullets have left guns slower!
Ross: Here they come, here they come. Oh-ho, if she kisses him goodnight, I抦 gonna kill myself, I swear. I can抰, I can抰 watch this. (turns away, then quickly turns to look again) Come on, date over! Date over! Uh-oh, here we go, she抯 going in.
Ross: She抯 going in. Wait! He抯 going in! He抯 going in!! The door抯 closed! I, I can抰 see anything but the door closed!!
Chandler: And the inventor of the door rests happily in his grave.
Ross: Okay, I have to do something. I mean, I have, I have to stop it!
Chandler: Stop what?!
Ross: I don抰 know, but I ah, I have the feeling that my being there will do it. I抣l go over and I will borrow something. Juice!! I need juice!!
(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)
Chandler: No!! You can抰!!
Ross: Look, they must be stopped!
Chandler: I am your friend, and I am not gonna let you do this!! (Ross is now dragging Chandler and the foosball table to the door) You are surprisingly strong!
Ross: I need juice! People need juice!!
Chandler: Look man!
Ross: People need juice!
Chandler: Listen to me!! (Chandler turns him around and closes and holds the door shut with his feet.)
Ross: Juice, I need...
Chandler: She抯 moving on! Okay, if it抯 not this guy, it抯 gonna be somebody else! And unless you抮e thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? It抯 over.
Ross: Yeah, okay.
Ross: It抯 just I miss her so much.
Chandler: I know. (He rubs Ross抯 head)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is pouring Mark some coffee.]
Mark: Why do all you抮e coffee mugs have numbers on the bottom?
Rachel: Oh. That抯 so Monica can keep track. That way if one on them is missing, she can be like, 慦here抯 number 27?!?br>
(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesn抰 react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)
Rachel: Y'know what?
Mark: No. And I don抰 think I抦 gonna want to.
Rachel: I can抰 do this.
Mark: Yep. Yep, that抯 what I didn抰 want to know.
Rachel: Well, oh, Mark, I抦 doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know? I抦 just doing it to get back at Ross. I抦 sorry, it抯 not very fair to you.
Mark: Ahh! Fair, schmair! Y'know? Look, if you want to get back at Ross, I am here for you. Really? No-no, I say-I say, I say we get back at him right on this couch. Right here!
Rachel: Oh God. I抦 sorry about this.
Mark: That抯 okay.
Rachel: You sure?
Mark: Yeah. I can just go home and get back at him by myself.
[Scene: A Hospital Reception, Monica and Pete are there.]
Spokeswoman: ...has become the penicillin of the twenty-first century. And so today, this hospital is about to take major steps toward leading that revolution. It is truly ironic, on one hand consider the size...
Pete: (to Monica) Hey, can I ask you something?
Pete: Where are we?
Monica: (looks around) Well, with all these doctors and nurses, I抦 gonna say, midget rodeo.
Pete: Just tell me the truth.
Monica: Okay. Umm, y'know, I don抰 think, I don抰 think I told you this, but umm, I just got out of a really serious relationship.
Pete: Oh, yeah. Wasn抰 that like a year ago?
Monica: So I did tell you. Okay, y'know, that really isn抰 the thing. Umm, the thing is that, right now I抦 just in a place in my life where I need to focus on me. Y'know what I mean?
Pete: Oh, yeah. I know that.
Monica: I so wanna be attracted to you.
Pete: But you抮e not. Okay, good.
Monica: I抦 sorry.
Pete: Y'know what, don抰 be. This is not, don抰 be, 慶ause it抯 not so bad.
Monica: It抯 not?
Pete: I know I抦 no John Bon Jovi, (Monica laughs) or someone who find attractive, I抦 just, I think, y'know, that you might end up feeling differently.
Monica: Well, um, look I-I don抰 want this to come our wrong, but ah, you seem awfully confident for a guy I just told I wasn抰 attracted too.
Pete: Yeah, stupidly charming isn抰?it? Well listen let抯, you wanna get something to eat? 慍ause this place is kinda depressing. (they start to leave)
Spokeswoman: And the man who made all this possible... Mr. Peter Becker.
Pete: (to Monica) One second.
(He takes the scissors, cuts the ribbon, shakes her hand, posses for the picture, and leaves.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is sitting in one of the black chairs, and turns to face the other one.]
Chandler: I don抰 think this town is big enough for both of us to relax in. (He blows on his hand) Draw!! (He quickly pulls the lever to raise the foot rest, like a gunfighter in a Western.)
Chandler: (to Joey) I wasn抰 doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?
Joey: Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks she抯 like the greatest actress since, since, sliced bread!
Chandler: Ah, Sliced Bread, a wonderful Lady MacBeth.
Joey: God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, 慜h, I抦 so talented.?and 慜h, I抦 so pretty,?and 慜oh, I smell so good.?br>
Chandler: I think somebody has a crush on somebody.
Joey: Hey, Chandler, can we please stay focused on my problem here?! Y'know?
Chandler: I抦 talking about you. You big, big freak.
Joey: Oh. (realises) Ohh. Ohh, you抮e out of your mind.
Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard you抎 be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
Joey: Oh, yeah?! Then how come I keep thinking about her in all these sexual scenarios and stuff huh?!
[Scene: The Theatre, Kate and Joey are rehearsing the same scene as before.]
Kate: Happy?! Is that what I抦 supposed to be Vic? Happy?
Joey: Well, why don抰 you tell me what you抮e supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell can抰 figure it out! I talk to you and it抯 nothin? You look at me, and nothin? (He kisses her, more passionately this time) Nothing.
The Director: You guys make me fly! High! Okay, we抮e gonna pick it up here, tomorrow.
Kate: Well, that was ah...
Kate: Yeah! Yeah, it was definitely an improvement. G抧ight.
Joey: Ah, Kate?
Joey: You ah, you forgot your shoes.
Kate: (she giggles) I抦 probably gonna need those. Huh? (she giggles some more)
Joey: Hey, listen you ah....
Joey: ...feel like getting a cup of coffee?
The Director: (leaning in) Kate?
The Director: You ready to go?
The Director: (to Joey) Very nice. Very nice. (he walks away)
Kate: So umm, I抣l see you tomorrow, huh?
Joey: Yeah, yeah sure, goodnight.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is in the kitchen chopping vegetables. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting in the living room.]
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Hey! (Chandler looks up, startled) Why isn抰 it Spiderman? Y択now like Goldman, Silverman...
Chandler: 慍ause it抯-it抯 not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn抰?
Chandler: No, it抯 not like, like Phil Spiderman. He抯 a spider, man. Y'know like ah, like Goldman is a last name, but there抯 no Gold Man.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. There should be Gold Man!
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Hey, Rach, how was work?
Rachel: Oh, great. Although I did sit down where there wasn抰 a chair.
Monica: By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.
Rachel: Oh, well, I guess I had that one coming. I抦 just gonna throw it out, it抯 probably just a bunch of shampoo and... (she opens the box and stops)
Monica: Something wrong?
Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing. (She smiles and goes into her room.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe and Chandler are sitting in the black chairs.]
Chandler: So, ahh, what kind of powers would Gold Man have?
Phoebe: Okay well, he would turn things to gold.
Chandler: What about things that are already gold?
Phoebe: Ahh, his work is done.
Chandler: Okay, let抯 play my game now.
Phoebe: Okay. All right you yellow-bellied-lilly-livered-DRAW!! (they both kick up the foot rests like an old fashioned gun fight.)