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老友记第六季The One With Joey Fridge

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The One With Joey’s Fridge

[Scene: Joey and now Rachel's apartment, Joey has the fridge pulled out away from the wall and is in the process of pulling off the cooling grate behind it.]

Joey: Well that thing is clearing in the way! All right. Ah-ha! (He grabs a screwdriver and starts to attack the compressor, only he causes a small short circuit and shocks himself.) Ah-ah!! Damn fridge!

(Rachel enters from her new room.)

Rachel: Hi Joey, how ya doin’?

Joey: Great! Roomie!

Rachel: Huh, yeah I guess we are roommates now.

Joey: Yeah! Well, now that you brought it up, our fridge is broken. We have to get a new one. Now, I checked around and your half is $400. Thanks a lot.

Rachel: I’m not paying for half of that! I’m only staying here until my apartment gets fixed.

Joey: Look Rach, my parents bought this fridge just after I was born, okay? Now, I have never had a problem with it. Then you show up and it breaks! What does that tell ya’?

Rachel: That refrigerators don’t live as long as people.

Joey: All right, now you know that the ATM will only lets you take out 300 at a time, I’ll take a check for the other hundred.

Rachel: You’re jokin’ right?

Joey: Of course I’m jokin’! I don’t take checks.

Rachel: Thank God you’re pretty. (Exits.)

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]

Rachel: Hey!

All: Hi! Hey!

Rachel: Do you guys know any cute guys?

Chandler: Well, of course I do! My good friend Joey over here. (Pats Joey’s arm, Joey pats Chandler’s shoulder, and Chandler motions for Joey to say the same about him.)

Joey: Oh, I’m sorry. Thank you Chandler.

Rachel: Anyway, there’s this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go…

Monica: What’s the charity?

Rachel: I don’t know, something either trees or disease—Ralph mumbles a lot.

Monica: Does Ralph mumble when you’re not paying attention?

Rachel: Yeah! It’s weird. But the thing is need to find a date.

Phoebe: Well, what kind of guy are you looking for?

Rachel: Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent a tux.

Chandler: So he has to be a male who has at least $50.

Joey: Ooh! So close.

(Ross and Elizabeth enter.)

Ross: Hey everybody!

All: Hi!

Ross: Hey uh, this is Elizabeth.

Elizabeth: Oh hi!

All: Hi!

Elizabeth: I’m the student.

Chandler: (laughs) Isn’t she cute? (On Monica’s death stare) No!

Phoebe: Y’know, this is probably none of my business, but weren’t you guys supposed to not be seen in public together?

Elizabeth: Oh, we’re not together.

Ross: Oh no-no-no, we’re just two people who happen to run into each other here at the coffee house. (He winks at her.)

Phoebe: Oh, sly.

Elizabeth: Well, I really wanted to meet you guys, but I have to run. I’ll see you later?

All: Okay!

Elizabeth: Bye Ross.

Ross: Bye.

(They kiss.)

Elizabeth: Oops! I did not mean to run into you like that sir.

Ross: Oh that is quite all right ma’am. (Elizabeth exits.)

Chandler: So, why is she leaving? Is it a school night and she has a lot of homework to do?

Ross: Yes, her molecular epidemiology paper is due tomorrow.

Chandler: Oh, tell her good luck with that.

Ross: Anyone else? Huh? Bring ‘em on!

Rachel: Oo! When’s her birthday?!

Ross: I don’t know Rachel, why?

Rachel: Well, y’know it’s just been so long since I’ve been to Chuckie Cheese.

Monica: Oh, I like Elizabeth.

Ross: Well thanks!

Monica: Yeah. In fact, I like her so much you tell her I want my cookies early this year! Y’know, a box of Thin Mints and some Tag-a-Longs.

Joey: Hey-hey come on you guys, give him a break. Ross, seriously, how’s it going with her?

Ross: Well, actually it’s been great. She’s 20 so she’s not looking for anything too serious, which is perfect for me right now.

Monica: Well that is great. And seriously, she seems very nice.

Ross: Thanks. I know you guys like to give me a hard time and all, but it really means a lot to me that you like her. Just knowing that you guys are…

Phoebe: (interrupting) Okay, I got a good one. Okay, umm, what is she? Like 12?

[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is sitting at the table and Monica is doing something in the kitchen.]

Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?

Chandler: Yeah. Do we have any Fruit Roll-Ups?

Phoebe: (entering) Hey!

Monica: Hey!

Phoebe: Okay, I just thought of the perfect guy for Rachel to take to her thing.

Chandler: Oh that’s so funny because we found someone too.

Phoebe: Oh that’s good, I guess she’ll have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.

Chandler: Why would our guy be a weirdo?

Phoebe: ‘Cause that’s just your taste.

Monica: (laughs sarcastically) Rachel is not going to pick your stupid guy.

Phoebe: Oh yeah?

Monica: Yeah!

Phoebe: My guy is a lawyer who has volunteer work. And, he has one of these (She squeezes the skin on her chin together to form…)

Chandler: A face ass?

Phoebe: A chin dimple!

Monica: Well, uh y’know, our guy works with Chandler and he’s really nice and smart and he’s a great dresser!

Phoebe: Have you seen your guy’s body?

Chandler: No, our guy is just a floating head.

Phoebe: Well my guy is spectacular. Okay? He’s a massage client and one time umm, when he was on the table, I looked at it. And I mean all of it.

Monica: You’re not supposed to look!

Phoebe: Oh yeah, like there are police for that!

Chandler: (horrified) Wait! You look? You-you massaged me.

Phoebe: I know. (Laughs.)

Monica: All right fine, your guy may have a great body, but our guy is really funny.

Phoebe: Oh, Chandler funny?

Monica: Our guy’s a great dancer!

Phoebe: My guy is well read.

Chandler: Our guy has great hair.

Phoebe: My guy has great teeth!

Chandler: Our guy smells incredible.

Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?

[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isn’t doing all that well.]

Chandler: Hey.

Joey: Huh.

Chandler: Well, you…don’t look good Joe.

Joey: The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limes—Hey, what was in that brown jar?

Chandler: That’s still in there?!

Joey: Not anymore. So anyway, how do you want to pay me?

Chandler: Is this a service you’re providing me?

Joey: No! No! No! For my new fridge—our new fridge!

Chandler: Our new fridge? I don’t live here anymore.

Joey: So what? Look, suppose we were a divorced couple.

Chandler: Uh-huh.

Joey: And I got custody of the kid, right? Now suppose the kid dies and-and I gotta buy a new kid.

Chandler: (not quite sure where Joey’s going and is a little worried) Okay…

Joey: (pause) Give me $400!

[Scene: Ross’s office, he’s unlocking his office door as Elizabeth walks up.]

Elizabeth: Professor Geller?

Ross: Hmm? (Turns around and sees that its Elizabeth) Oh, a student I don’t know.

Elizabeth: I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?

Ross: Yes, yes of course, what-what would this be regarding?

Elizabeth: Making out in your office.

Ross: Shh! (Laughs then composes himself) Of course, why don’t we go inside?

(They go inside and Ross closes the door. When he turns around Elizabeth walks up to him, pushes him back against the door, and starts kissing him.)

Ross: Oh-ooh!

Elizabeth: What?

Ross: Doorknob! Doorknob!

Elizabeth: Oh! Sorry! Umm, I actually do need to talk to you.

Ross: Oh, okay. What-what about?

Elizabeth: Spring vacation.

Ross: Spring vacation.

Elizabeth: Yeah, we have time off and a lot of people are going on trips…

(Another professor barges in.)

Professor Feesen: Professor Geller!

Ross: (quickly jumping away from Elizabeth) Yes, professor Feesen-sen-stenlger… I’ll be with you in one moment. (To Elizabeth) So, I will take one box of the Thin Mints. (And he ushers Elizabeth out of the office.)

[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and Joey are entering.]

Ross: You don’t understand! Elizabeth was about to ask me to go on a trip with her! Is that taking it slow?! No, I’m not ready for this! Okay? What-what do I tell her?

Chandler: Just tell her the truth! Tell her you’re not ready.

Ross: I can do that. Oh-oh, what if she gets upset?

Chandler: Then you distract her with a Barbie doll.

Joey: Or! You can just, y’know… (He walks up close to whisper in Ross’s ear and when he gets there he pushes Ross into the fridge.)

Ross: What the hell are you doing?

Joey: What? What the hell am I doing? You just broke my fridge!

Ross: What?! What? How do you, how do you even know its broken?!

Joey: Oh-ho-ho, you think I don’t know what breaks my fridge? Excuse me! (He opens the door and feels inside.) Well what do you know! Broken! That’ll be $400!

Chandler: Joey, I saw you push him!

Joey: (pause) You pushed him!

Ross: Joey, I did not break this! Okay? (He opens the freezer and smells inside and recoils in disgust.) That has been broken for a while.

Joey: All right. Chandler, do you remember how I told you about our fridge?

Chandler: Uh-huh.

Joey: I still haven’t gotten a check for your half yet.

Ross: Do not give him any money!

Joey: I’m not talking to you! You broke my fridge!

[Scene: Ross’s office, he’s opening the door to Elizabeth.]

Elizabeth: You wanted to see me Professor Geller?

Ross: Yes. Yes! Please, come in.

(She does so, he closes the door, and she pushes him against the doorknob again.)

Ross: Oo-oo!

Elizabeth: Doorknob?

Ross: Yeah, it kinda grows on you. (They both laugh.) Actually, I wanted to finish talking to you about uh, spring vacation.

Elizabeth: Oh good.

Ross: Look, I… (He has trouble sitting in his chair.) Look, I’m having a great time with you and I just don’t want us to move to fast or put to much pressure on us. So, I’m sorry I just don’t think we should go away together yet. It’s-it’s too soon.

Elizabeth: Ross, I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I just wanted to tell you that I’m going to Florida for a couple weeks.

Ross: No. I think you misunderstood what I was saying. What I meant was…

Elizabeth: You are so adorable.

Ross: That! Let’s talk about that.

[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]

Ross: Hey!

Chandler: Hey!

Phoebe: Hey!

Monica: Hey! How did it go with Elizabeth?

Ross: Huh? Oh-oh, it was fine. Uh, it was just a misunderstanding. She didn’t want me to go with her. She just wanted to let me know that she’s going to Florida for spring vacation.

Chandler: Wait a minute, is she going for spring vacation or is she going for spring break? (Does a little whooping/party noise.)

Ross: What’s-what’s the difference?

Monica: Well, spring vacation is doing nice things with your grandparents. Spring break you’re doing frat guys.

Ross: Hey, y’know what? Not all spring breaks are like that.

Phoebe: What did you do on yours?

Ross: I went to Egypt with my dad.

Chandler: I can see it now, "Look dad, it’s the Sphinx!" (Does that party noise again.)

Ross: Hey, I think Elizabeth is a little more serious than, "Spring break!" (Imitates the party noise.) All right? I mean she’s taken my class!

Monica: And slept with the professor.

Ross: I’m gonna call her.

Chandler: Yeah.

(Ross leaves to do so and Rachel enters with a guy.)

Rachel: Hey! You guys umm, I want you to meet Sebastian.

Sebastian: Hi.

Rachel: We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. We both grabbed for the last Field & Stream. (Chandler’s shocked.) What? I read that.

Sebastian: Can I get you a cup of coffee?

Rachel: Oh yes! Thank you! (He does so and Rachel sits down on the couch.)

Phoebe: Rachel, what the hell is this?!

Rachel: (shocked) What?

Phoebe: You ask us to find you a guy and you come traipsing in here with your own!

Rachel: You found me a guy?

Monica: Yes! We found you a really cute and funny guy from Chandler’s work!

Phoebe: Yeah and I-I found you one too who is not a weirdo.

Rachel: Well, y’know what though you guys? I really appreciate that but I think I’m just gonna take Sebastian to the charity.

Chandler: Are you sure?! Because our guy smells incredible!

Monica: Uh, would you stop it with that already?!

(Sebastian returns with the coffee.)

Sebastian: Here you go. (Hands her, her cup.)

Rachel: Oh, thank you.

Sebastian: Sure.

Phoebe: So, Sebastian, do you do any volunteer work?

Sebastian: Uh, no not really. Why?

Phoebe: No reason, it’s just I know a single guy that cares about other people.

Chandler: Are you funny?

Sebastian: Excuse me?

Rachel: What are you guys doing?

Monica: Are you funny? Tell us a joke!

Sebastian: Look, I just wanted to have coffee with Rachel.

Phoebe: Well, so do a lot of people.

Sebastian: Actually, I uh, I gotta get going. (To Rachel) Give me a call sometime.

Rachel: Oh, but y’know, no, you didn’t give me your phone number.

Sebastian: Okay! See you later! (Exits.)

Chandler: (To Monica) Turns out he is kinda funny.

Commercial Break

[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier.]

Rachel: I cannot believe you guys! He was really nice and he left because of you!

Chandler: Yeah, but Sebastian? What is that? A cat’s name?

Phoebe: Yeah, y’know what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that the kind of guy you’d like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like to dance?" (Imitates him.) "Uhh, okay—I gotta go!"

Monica: All right guys stop it. Rachel, we’re very sorry that is a very insensitive thing for us to do. And y’know what? Let us make it up to you, we have two really great guys for you.

Phoebe: Yeah! What have you got to lose? Y’know you might even end up with someone really special (whispers) if you pick my guy.

Rachel: All right.

Chandler: Okay, so you will meet our guys?

Rachel: Yes, I’ll meet ‘em.

Chandler: Okay now it doesn’t matter which one you choose, y’know? It’s completely up to you. Our guy is perfect, or you can go out with the guy Phoebe deemed not good enough to go out with herself.

Joey: (entering) Pheebs! There you are! Okay, you broke my fridge; you owe me 400 bucks!

Phoebe: Okay sure!

Joey: Really?!

Phoebe: Ooh, technically you owe me $600 for sending out happy thoughts on your last ten auditions.

Joey: Call it even?

Phoebe: Okay.

(Ross returns.)

Chandler: (To Ross) Well, there you are! So what did Elizabeth say?

Ross: Well, it turns out that she is going to Daytona for spring break woo-hoo. That means, that means wet T-shirt contests, guys doing shots off of girl’s bodies, waking up next to people you don’t even know…

Joey: Man, she is going to have a great time! Is she staying at the Hotel Corona?

Chandler: You know the hotels?

Joey: Sure! I was there! Spring Break ’81! Woo-hoo!

Monica: In 1981 you were 13!

Joey: So what? I drove down, sold T-shirts, had a blast. And y’know who knows how to party? Drunk college chicks.

Ross: Okay, she can’t go.

Phoebe: Ross, you can’t tell her not to go. You just started dating.

Ross: Then what am I supposed to do?

Phoebe: Nothing, you just have to be cool with it.

Ross: Well, what is she goes down and-and sleeps with a bunch of guys?

Chandler: Well, maybe you don’t marry this one.

[Scene: Elizabeth’s apartment, she is packing for her trip as Ross watches.]

Ross: I’m so glad you’re going on this trip!

Elizabeth: Yeah! I’ve been working so hard this semester. I really need to go crazy y’know, blow off some steam.

Ross: Sure. Sure. Look I don’t, I don’t know if your plans are finalized yet, but umm, hey I-I know another great way to blow off steam.

Elizabeth: What?

Ross: Are you into crafts at all?

Elizabeth: Ross, are you okay?

Ross: Well, yeah, of-of course I’m okay! What? I’m just being supportive. Supportive of you and this whole trip, and-and (notices something) what-what is uh, what’s this? (He holds up a rather skimpy bathing suit.)

Elizabeth: It’s a bathing suit?

Ross: To wear in front of people?

Elizabeth: Is that supportive?

Ross: Is this?!

[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is reading as Monica and Chandler enter.]

Monica: Hey!

Chandler: Good-good-good-good.

Monica: Hey!

Chandler: Hey!

Rachel: Hi!

Monica: We’re really glad you decided to meet our guy.

Rachel: Oh…

Monica: You’re gonna like him so much. So umm, when do you want to meet him?

Rachel: I don’t know. I know I don’t work late tomorrow night.

Chandler: Tomorrow night is good. Tomorrow night is good, but uh, y’know what? Why put off something till tomorrow that you can do right now? (Laughs) Eldad come here! (He stands up from the next table.)

Rachel: What?

Monica: Eldad, this is Rachel.

Eldad: How are you?

Rachel: Well-well a little blind sided but y’know good.

Chandler: Eldad, sit down. (To Rachel) Move over! Move over now!

Rachel: I—Ohh! (Moves over and lets Eldad sit on the couch.)

Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)

Monica: Okay! Okay! We can take a hint! (They start to leave but run into Phoebe with her guy in tow.) (To Phoebe) What are you doing here?!

Phoebe: This is Patrick. (Points to him.)

Patrick: Hi.

Chandler: Hi. (To Phoebe) Okay, you’re too late okay? Because she’s already with our guy.

Phoebe: (looks) Oh my God, you’re right! I am too late; they’re sitting on the couch and talking! (To Patrick) Come on! (They go over to the couch.) Rachel?

Rachel: Yeah?

Phoebe: This is Patrick.

Rachel: Oh, hi.

Patrick: Hi.

Phoebe: Yeah, this is the guy I was telling you about.

Rachel: Yeah?

Phoebe: Yeah. And believe me, this suit does not do justice to what’s underneath it.

Rachel: Oh-okay, but Pheebs?

Phoebe: Yeah?

Rachel: I’m just sort of in the middle of something.

Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, that’s okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)

Monica: No! You can’t do that!

Eldad: Maybe I should go!

Monica: (stopping him) Sit down! We’re winning!

Rachel: Okay, y’know what? Maybe I should go!

All: (Chandler stops her) No-no-no-no! Have a seat! Have a seat!

Monica: Rachel! Rachel! You haven’t touched Eldad’s hair!

Chandler: It is the softest hair! Touch it! (Both he and Monica do so.)

Rachel: Yeah, I’m good.

Phoebe: Rachel? Patrick is really rich. (To Patrick) Give her some money.

Patrick: Y’know what Phoebe? This isn’t really worth the free massage.

Monica: That’s right Patrick, bye-bye!

Chandler: (To Rachel) Eldad is much more cooperative! And he can dance! (To Eldad) You dance for Rachel!

(He starts to get up, but Rachel stops him.)

Rachel: No-no! Don’t dance for me! Please? Don’t! (She gets up to yell at her ‘friends.’) What is the matter with you guys?

Phoebe: Yeah, okay, let’s talk it out.

Rachel: I… Am I the only one that this is embarrassing for?

Eldad: I’m a little embarrassed. (Chandler shushes him.)

Rachel: I’ll tell ya who should be embarrassed! It’s you guys! Come on! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!

Phoebe: Then why did she ask us to…

Rachel: I am still talking!! And then you chase away the one guy that I actually liked! I mean, no offense to you guys. Really! I mean (To Patrick) congratulations on all the cash, (He nods) and-and y’know—(Feels Eldad’s hair)—Wow! You do have very soft hair! But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go through anymore of this! Good-bye! (Grabs her stuff, starts to leave, then turns back suddenly, and to Eldad) Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?!

Eldad: Yes, Papaya Extract.

Rachel: Thank you! (Storms out.)

[Scene: The airport, Elizabeth’s flight is about to leave and Ross is there to send her off.]

Ross: So uh, have a great time down there.

Elizabeth: I will.

Ross: Yeah. And did you, did you pack that bathing suit?

Elizabeth: Yeah.

Ross: It was pretty funny when I, when I hid it for a while, huh? Anyway, umm, I-I am worried about that bathing suit, not because it’s revealing which I’m fine with, no I’m concerned about your health, sun exposure.

Elizabeth: Oh, don’t worry I have plenty of sun block, it’s SPF-30.

Ross: Well, if what’s in the bottle is actually 30. I mean sometimes you get 30, sometimes it’s-it’s get 4, and I swear to God more often than not it’s just milk.

Elizabeth: Ross, it’s going to be okay. I’m not going down there to hook up with a bunch of guys. I really like you. I like how things are going between us.

Ross: Really?

Elizabeth: Yeah! I’m just going down there to relax and hang out with my friends.

Ross: Okay. Cool.

Elizabeth: Oh hey! Here they are!

(A group of about 10 guys and no women come running around the corner.)

Guy: Elizabeth!

(The guys pick up Elizabeth and carry her onto the plane as she waves bye.)

Ross: Call me!

Ending Credits

[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]

Phoebe: Rachel, we’re sorry for pushing those guys on you.

Rachel: Oh that’s all right! Y’know, I ended up having a really good time. Y’know, the charity was a big success and they raised a lot of money and awareness.

Chandler: So what was it for anyway?

Rachel: I wanna say a disease.

Joey: (entering) Hey!

All: Hey!

Joey: I just got this really weird message from Ross. He said turn on MTV.

Rachel: Huh. All right.

(Rachel does so and it’s one of those dance party shows they have during spring break and we see…)

Phoebe: Oh my God, look! That’s Elizabeth!

(Suddenly Ross jumps in and starts dancing with her.)

Rachel: Oh-oh Professor Geller.

Joey: Ahh, to be 13 again.

Chandler: Yeah.

End


好啦,现在总算干净了
搞定。啊~啊!
该死的电冰箱!
嗨乔伊,过的怎么样
非常好!室友!
呃,现在我们的确算室友了
对,所以该你做点事了
我们的电冰箱坏了,得买台新的
我算了算,你付一半400块
谢谢!
我才不付呢,等我的公寓修好了
我就搬回去了
我爸妈在我出生后不久就买了它
它从来就没出过问题
你一来,它就坏了
这说明什么呢?
说明电冰箱不能和人一样长寿
好吧,我知道取款机一次最多
只能取300块,我来付100
你在开玩笑?
我当然在开玩笑
我一分也不付
幸好你长的还帅
619:《乔伊的冰箱》
字幕:情景喜剧网
出品:情景喜剧网
WWW.CNSITCOM.COM
- 嘿
- 嗨,嘿
你们有认识帅哥吗?
当然,我的好朋友乔伊坐在那儿
很抱歉,但谢谢你钱德
这个周末有个募捐舞会
拉夫·劳伦(女名模)要来
所以我也想去
给谁募捐?
我不清楚,树木或者疾病什么的
拉夫叨咕了一堆话
拉夫叨咕的时候你就不能集中注意?
对!真怪
现在的问题是找一个男伴
你想找什么样的?
得是个自己有礼服
或者租的起礼服的
看来得是个至少有50美元的男性
噢!差一点
- 嘿伙计们
- 嗨
呃,这是伊丽莎白
- 嗨
- 嗨
我是个学生
她漂亮吗?
不!
这可能不关我的事情,但…
你们是不想在公共场所
被人看出在一起吗?
噢,我们不是一起的
不不不,我们只是
两个在咖啡厅邂逅的人
噢,狡猾
我真想好好认识你们
不过我该走了,下次见?
好!
- 再见罗斯
- 再见
噢,很抱歉我不是故意的
别放心上
她干吗走了?
要上晚自习去赶作业?
是的
她的分子流行病学论文明天交
那帮我助她好运
还有么?呃?说吧
她的生日是几号?
我不知道瑞秋,干吗问?
因为我已经很多年没去
儿童乐园过生日了
- 我喜欢伊丽莎白
- 谢谢
我太喜欢她了,所以我准备为她
提前做今年的曲奇饼
给她一大盒薄荷饼和其他的
拜托~你们这些家伙,别整他了
罗斯,你们相处的如何?
很不错,不过她只有20所以…
她比较喜欢玩闹,这很适合我
那太好了,说实话,她看起来不错
谢谢。我知道你总喜欢涮我
不过你们是否喜欢她
对我真的很重要,你们是…
好,我来问一个
她是不是跟12岁一样?
钱德,你觉得关于
我们的关系的讨论够了吗?
是。我们有没有水果卷?
- 嘿
- 嘿
我刚刚为瑞秋选了个完美的男孩
很有趣我们也找了一个
那很好,看来她得在我的人
和你们的怪人中挑一个了
为什么我们的就是怪人?
因为那就是你们的品味嘛
瑞秋才不会选你的傻瓜人选呢
- 噢是吗?
- 没错!
我选的是个做义工的律师
他还有这个…
脸屁股?
下巴窝
我们选的是钱德的同事
他人好又聪明还会化妆
你们看过他的身子吗?
没,我们的朋友只是一颗浮头
我的朋友是个彪形大汉
他是我的一个按摩客户,一次…
他在按摩台上,我看了他的身体
全部身体
你怎么能这么做?
那怎么,警察难道会抓我?
等等,你也给我按摩过
我知道
好吧,你朋友也许是个猛男
但我们的人,他很风趣
像钱德这样?
我们的是舞林高手
我的是学富五车
我们的有一头靓发
我的有两排洁牙
我们的浑身异香
我们说的是一个人吗?
- 嘿
- 嘿
你看起来很糟,乔伊
冰箱坏了,我不得不把东西都吃了
冷盘,冰淇淋,橙汁
嘿,棕瓶子里装了什么?
- 它还在?
- 现在不在了
你准备付我多少钱?
你在为我吃这些东西?
不不,我说新冰箱,我们的新冰箱
我们的新冰箱?我都不在这里住了
- 那怎么,假设我们是离婚的夫妻
- 呃
而且我抚养了孩子
现在孩子死了
而我则要买一个新孩子

给我400美元
- 盖勒教授?
- 呣?
噢,同学,我不知道
我想问,能不能和你谈一会儿
当然,当然可以
你想谈些什么?
- 见识一下你的办公室
- 嘻~
当然,我们进去谈如何?
- 噢~哦
- 怎么
门把手!门把手!
抱歉
事实上我有点事
好,关于什么?
春游
春游?
对,我们要放假一段时间
很多人都出去旅游
盖勒教授
费森教授
请等我一分钟
那么,给我拿盒薄荷饼
你们不明白
伊丽莎白请我和她去春游
这样是不是太快了,我还没准备
我该怎么给她说?
对她说实话,说你还没准备好
我不能这样
这样会让她难堪的
那你就拿个巴比娃娃哄她
或者,你可以…你知道
你这是在干吗?
什么?我干吗?
你弄坏了我的冰箱!
什么?你怎么
你怎么知道它坏了?
噢,你认为我不知道
你弄坏了我的冰箱?
你看看~坏了
赔我400美元
乔伊,我看到是你推他的
你推他的?
乔伊,这不是我弄坏的
它早已经坏了
-钱德,记得我对你说这是我们的冰箱?
-呃
我到现在还没收到你那一半钱
别给他钱!
没跟你说!弄坏冰箱的家伙!
你要见我,盖勒教授?
对,是的,进来吧
- 噢~哦
- 门把手?
你看起来成熟了不少
事实上,我想和你谈谈春游的事
哦,好
听着,我…
我们相处的时间还不长,所以我…
我不想太快,那样会给大家压力
很抱歉,我不能一起出去旅游
这样太快了
罗斯,我想你误会了
我只是告诉你我准备去佛州两周

我想你误会了我的话
我的意思是…
你真是可爱
好吧,我们谈谈可爱
嘿!
和伊丽莎白的事怎么样?
没问题,只是一场误会
她不是要我一起去
她只是告诉我她准备去佛州春游
等等,她是去春游还是去度春假?
有什么不同吗?
嗯,春游就是和家人出去
而度春假就是和男孩子出去
未必吧,度春假不都是那样的
那你是怎么度过的?
我和我爸爸去了埃及
我能想象:
“爸爸看,狮身人面像!”
我像伊丽莎白才不会像你这样
“度春假噢~噢~”
她是一个选了我的课的学生
而且还和教授上床
- 我给她打电话
- 这就对了
伙计们,这是塞巴斯蒂

我们刚刚在报摊认识
我们同时抓起了一本《田野与河流》
呃,我读过
我去给你拿杯咖啡?
噢好,谢谢你
瑞秋,这算怎么回事?
什么?
你让我们给你找个男伴
却自己从大街上拉了一个回来
我们给我找了?
对,我们找了钱德的同事,他非常棒
我给你找了个…至少不是怪人
我真的很感激你们,但是…
我想我还是和塞巴斯蒂一起去舞会好了
你确定?我们介绍的可是浑身异香
你能不能别说了
这是你的
噢谢谢
塞巴斯蒂,你是义工吗?
呃,不是,怎么?
不怎么。只是我认识
一个关心别人的好单身男人
你风趣吗?
什么?
你们这是在干吗?
你风趣吗?给我们讲个笑话!
我只是和瑞秋来喝杯咖啡
嗯,很多人这样想
我想我该走了
给我电话吧
好,不过你没说过你的号码
那好,再见!
看来他还是有幽默感的
我简直不能相信
他这么棒,就这样被你赶跑了
塞巴斯蒂,听起来像猫的名字
瑞秋,我注意到了,他很胆小
你难道么带这样的人去舞会?
“嘿塞巴斯蒂,能跳支舞吗?”
“呃,好,我…”
够了你们,瑞秋,很抱歉
我知道我们这样做很不对,不过…
我保证你能认识两个更出众的男孩
对!你又有什么损失呢
呢最后会和一个白马王子出去
如果你挑的是我选的话
好吧
- 好,你答应见他们了?
- 是,我答应了
无论你选谁都没关系
这完全取决于你
选我们的完美男人,还是…
…菲比剩下的一般货色
菲比!你在这儿!
你弄坏了我的冰箱,赔我400美元!
好没问题
真的?!
是,不过你还欠我600美元
作为我给你试镜出点子的报酬
相互抵消如何?
很好
怎么样,伊丽莎白怎么说?
她说她是去代顿度春假
那意味着湿衫比赛
男孩的目光会在女孩身上扫射
第二天醒来甚至不知道一起睡的是谁
看来她要过一段好日子了
她是住王冠酒店吗?
你知道那酒店?
当然,81年的春假我就在那里
喔~
可81年你才13岁
那有什么?
我开车去,卖卖T恤,体验疯狂
你们知道晚会上都是什么人吗?
—喝醉的女学生美眉
她不能去
罗斯,你不能这样命令她
你们才刚开始约会
那我该怎么办
什么也不做,表现的冷淡些
难道就由她去和一堆男人睡觉?
也许你可以不娶她
我真为你的旅行高兴
我用功了一学期
真的该去疯狂疯狂了
去体验汗流浃背
当然…当然
我不知道你的计划是否最终决定了
不过…
我建议你去另个地方体验汗流浃背
什么?
我们玩过家家怎么样?
罗斯,你不高兴我去?
我当然希望你去,我十分支持你且…
哇,这、这是什么?
一件泳衣
穿在别人面前?
你这样算支持吗?
这东西?!
- 嘿
- 好好好好

- 很高兴你同意见我们的人
- 哦
你一定会很喜欢他的
那,你准备什么时候见他?
我不知道,明天晚上我没事
明天晚上很好、很好。不过,
我们不如把今晚的事推到明晚去?
- 艾尔达,过来!
- 什么?
艾尔达,这就是瑞秋
你好。
看来我侧视是瞎了,你看起来不错
艾尔达,坐下
移移,移个位置
行了,就坐这儿吧
好好,我们不做电灯泡了
你到这里来干吗?
这是帕特
- 嗨
- 嗨
你来晚了,她已经在和我们的人谈了
噢老天,我是来晚了
他们已经谈到床上了!
拜托
- 瑞秋
- 什么?
这就是帕特
- 噢嗨
- 嗨
- 他就是我对你说的人
- 嗯?
相信我,这套西装里面的身子
绝对是一流的
- 嗯好,不过菲比
- 什么?
你们这样让我很为难的
好好,没问题
坐下
- 你不能这么做!
- 也许我得走了
坐下!我们赢定了!
好吧,那么我走
不不不,坐下,坐下
瑞秋,你还没有摸过艾尔达的头发
非常的柔软,摸摸看!
对我很好
瑞秋,帕特很有钱
给她一些钱!
菲比,免费按摩前你可没说这条
是的帕特,拜拜!
艾尔达绝对是个好舞伴
给瑞秋跳一个!
不不,别跳,千万别!
你们这是怎么拉?
我们过来说两句
难道这里只有我感到难为情吗?
我也有些难为情
你们,才是真正该难为情的!
拜托,这真是可笑,非常感谢
但是我不需要你们来给我安排约会!
那你干吗叫我们…
我还没说完!你们还为此赶走了
我真正看上的男孩。我不是骂你们两
恭喜你那么有钱
哇,你的头发的确不错
但是我更愿意跟我自己选择的人
去参加舞会!拜拜!
告诉我你到底用什么东西洗头?
- 番木瓜汁
- 谢谢
那么,祝你玩的开心
- 我会的
- 嗯
还有,你还是把那件泳衣包进去了吗?
是的
我用它跟你玩捉迷藏的游戏
很有趣是吧,呃?
反正,我还是担心那件泳衣
并不是因为那个
而是因为我关心你的健康
你知道,太阳很辣
别担心,我带了很多防晒霜
是SPF-30
谁知道30里面究竟装的什么?
有些时候买30,里面却是4
甚至有时候只是牛奶而已
罗斯,别担心
我不会在那边钓凯子的
我珍惜我们俩的关系
- 真的?
- 是的
我只是和我的朋友们去放松放松
好。
哦嘿,他们来了
伊丽莎白!
给我电话!
瑞秋,很抱歉我们自做主张
没关系,我在舞会玩的不错
最后他们收到了很多捐款
给哪捐的?
好像是疾病吧?

罗斯给我留了条很怪的信息
他说打开MTV
呃,好吧
哦天哪,看,是伊丽莎白!
哦,盖勒教授
- 啊哈,又回到了13岁
- 嗯

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