Jason: Mike, Mike, get the animal out of here.
Mike: come on dad, stuart was not ***,it was peppy.
Jason: Mike, Animals who live off human toes are not peppy.
Mike: This is great. you know. I'm trying to do a great deal for the neighbor who is out of
town.now you guys can't do this complain
Ben: How come you only do good deal for neighbor walks like this
Mike: Ben there's a phrase one good turn deserves another. mean any thing to you?
Jason: Mike there's a phrase get that dog out of here before I punt it to the greenhouse. mean
any thing to you?
Jason: Hi, carol!
Jason: What's the matter carol?
Carol: I can't find the peanut butter
when is mum coming home?
Jason: Usual time
Carol: Can i call her at work?
Jason: of course you can ,sweetheart, if it's important
Carol: Yes, maggic seaver there,please? ... could you tell her to call carol when she gets back
it's really important...ok thanks bye
Jason: Something you want to talk to me about?
Carol: I don't know
Jason: Want me to leave you alone?
Carol: I don't know
Jason: Do you want me to stick large *** vegetables in my ears and play the accordion? Hey
come on remember what we used to do when you were just a little girl and you had a problem
i *** over here spinning around and *** like that? so we can have a face to face chat?
Jason: It doesn't work any more. come on ,talk to me.
Carol: Today was the last day of the german club gummy bear selling.*** that was my last
*** chance to get kevin to notice me before the dance tomorrow night and kevin's friend
mark was coming up to get a gummy and melissa said she heard mark said he said
Jason: Wait wait who said?
Carol: kevin said
Jason: Said what?
Carol: Said said i look like a gummy bear
Jason: well honey i'm sure he meant it in a nice way
Carol:*** dad I mean the boy thinks i look like a bear i'm just ugly
Jason: You do not like a bear. but if you walk around thinking that you look ugly then you can
end up looking like this.look. can you see it ***.now if you walking around know you're
pretty, because you are ,then you gotta feel better. you are looking like this. what do you think?
Carol: I think it's more important what kevin thinks.
Jason: Ok but did you actually hear kevin say that he thought you look like a gummy bear?
Carol: No, but melissa said she heard he said it
Jason: why do you believe everything melissa said she heard
Carol: Well she does make me wonder sometimes i mean she swore she saw %someone's
and some shop's name% last week
JAson: well they did have that big sale on home furnishings
Jason: Come on. I just think that you should take your *** about what kevin thinks from what
kevin says himself.
Carol: Yeah you're right i need new ice skates
Jason: Did i miss something?
Carol: well everybody's gonna be at skating rink tomorrow night and i can ski by kevin and
see if he says anything to me
Jason: Tomorrow morning you and i go down to %name of a shop% and we buy a brand new
pair of skates who knows maybe we'll ***run into *** in small***
Carol: Thanks dad
Maggie: Carol, Carol.
Jason: I'm here mum. ***
Maggie: Hi sweetheart where's carol? i got a message she wants to talk to me
Jason: she's over the %someone's name%'s
Jason: How was your day?
Maggie: Oh another last minute rewrite i never type so fast in my life my fingers are still
Jason: oh don't be wasting those *** fingers and try to *** below the shoulder ***
Maggie: Oh Jason.
Jason: Perfect thank you
Maggie: So what did carol want to talk about Jim said she sounds very upset
Jason: yes well it seems she has reasons to believe that kevin thought that she looks like a
Maggie: kevin? the one in the german club?
Jason: My dear the *** of the German club
Maggie: oh no she's had a crush on him since
Jason: Yeah since the october %a name% party
Maggie:wow kids must be *** eh i'll talk to her when she get home
Jason: But she's fine now
Maggie: she is?
Jason: Yeah we've talked it over ***
Maggie: You did?
Jason: I did
Maggie: Honey you don't have to say that *** i won't feel guilty
Jason: oh no maggie we've talked the whole thing over through and through inside enough.
we cried we laughed we hugged we closed with a song
Maggie: That's good that's good Jason, but if you don't mind i think i'll talk to her just the
Jason: she's fine Maggie
Maggie: Honey she always says she's fine now when she coming home?
Jason: You don't think I can hold up *** the bargain, do you?
Maggie: Oh, jason what bargain.
Jason: Oh, come on the bargain were you go back to work and i stay here and take care the
Jason: Nah you don't think that i can handle it do you
Maggie: Jason it's not that i don't think that you can handle it. It's ...
Jason: No,no,no. I happen to be a highly skilled professional consultant
Maggie: Oh, Jason
Jason: Who once talked to a man down from the shark ***
Jason: No , no, no. I mean because I was the guy who predicted two weeks before the police
caught son of sam that he would turn out to be an ugly male man from new *** and talk to
his neighbor's dog.
Maggie: Jason, it's not that I don't think that you are a wonderful psychiatrist but you're just
not a mother.
Jason: Well that's fine with me because this *** is killing me
Mike: Ben, where's mum and dad?
Ben: Hey, Mike! what's hide from mum?
Mike: sh.....me hide something from my beloved mother and father?
Ben: oh no *** another one. Will it bite me?
Mike: What's the matter ben are you *** stuart?
Ben: Mike, Stuart is black.
Ben: This dog is white.
Ben: So I think that's a noticeable difference.
Mike: Ben you gotta help me. Stuart ran away.
Ben: Wendy's planing to kill you
Mike: No she doesn't find out.
Ben: Mike, even one of your girlfriend has a sharp eye at remembering the color of her own
Mike:That's ok with wendy you just make sure mum and dad won't find out.
Maggie: Hi guys, what's this?
Ben" What dog?
Maggie: Who said anything about the dog?
Ben: Not me.
Carol: Hi mum.
Maggie: Hi, sweetheart, how are you?
Carol:Fine, great, just in time for my show!
Maggie: Oh I got your message and would've called you back but I was out of the office all
Carol: Oh that's ok mum. Look at this guy
Maggie: What is this?
Carol: It's sturgeons of %a name% street
Maggie: Why's the *** floors?
Carol: Their family dog died they *** to tell the grandma
Maggie: Oh, so honey you wanna talk about what happend at school the day? Carol?
Carol: Aha, mum, what did you say?
Maggie: Oh, you must be very upset about what kevin said .
Maggie: Oh good commercial so let's talk. What's with this kevin anyway.
Carol: Alright i've talked everything through with dad
Maggie: I know that, but I thought maybe a woman to woman talk.
Carol: No, really, mum I'm fine.
Maggie: You are! Are you sure? Honey, you don't have say that just so that i won't feel guilty.
Carol: No, I swear it's ok mum you know I thought I wasn't gonna like it when you went back
to work but it's really *** having dad at home now
Maggie: great it's great
Carol: Hey does wacky sturgeons on yet? Ah, come on dad sit in the middle.
eh can you move off a little mum.
Jason: You gonna love this.
Wendy: Hi, it's wendy!
Jason: Hi! Wendy, come on in.How are you doing ?
Jason: How was your vacation?
Wendy: Oh, it's great first we went to Europe and then we went to France.
Jason: Yes, well, you must have quite a travel agency. Mike, Wendy's here.
Wendy: I hope stuart wasn't too much trouble for you.
Jason: Stuart no no what we started feeded it the neighbor's childrens' we hardly knew he
Mike: Hi wendy .
Wendy: Hi, mike hi %call the dog%
Mike: Wow it looks glad to see you, Wendy.
Ben: That does look like Stuart, doesn't it? Same color and everything.
Mike: Oh yes Wendy want *** you and stuart home come on stuart come on yeah that's it
yeah good dog come on. Just look at it Wendy, I mean, he was so excited about you coming
home last night he didn't sleep *** now of course it is exhaust.
Ben: Yeah, dad?
Jason: What did mike do to Stuart?
Ben: The truth,dad?
Jason: Yeah Ben.
Ben: Mike didn't do anything to stuart, bye.
Maggie: Hi, sweetheart.
Maggie: Where's Carol?
Jason: I don't know. Are we going on vacation here?
Maggie: No, no, I just thought I take Carol onto the city for the day *** to a couple of art
galleries *** to tab on the green for lunch then maybe *** zoo
Maggie: I know, Carol must be dying to see that %animal name% from Detroit.
Jason: Those thing come from Detroit?
Maggie: Anyway I thought we had time
Jason: Listen, sweetheart does carol know all about this?
Maggie: No, why?
Jason: Well it's just Carol and I were planning to go shopping together the day for a new pair
Jason: I think it's important to her well you know kevin and other kids are going skating this
Jason: And you know the big dance is tonight.
Jason: Oh yes.
Maggie: No I didn't realize that.
Maggie:But that's more your *** now well honey you two have a good time.
Jason: Maggie wanna come with us?
Maggie: Oh, no. I just be in the way.
Jason: No,no. Don't be ridiculous.
Maggie: No. No. I can have fun here really. I'll just do the laundry maybe clean a few toilets.
Jason: Does it bother you that carol and I have plans together ?
Maggie: No, no. I think it's great I mean sure she didn't have time to talk to me last night and
she doesn't have time to be with me the day but I love seeing the two of you together you're
her father she's your daughter you father and daughter you should do things together your
father and daughter things I'm very happy for this.
Jason: Maggie, you know when carol came from school yesterday all upset she really wanted
to talk to you.
Jason: Oh yes it was like pulling teeth to get it opened up to old dad
Jason: She still need her mother, you know.
Maggie: Sometimes I don't feel like it.
Jason: Oh, she does and you still are the *** in the family
Jason: Very nice!
Maggie: Hah. So you are saying that I'm overacting a bit
Jason: No, no, I'm saying you are overacting a lot.
Mike: Dad i'm telling you she's to face that stuart going through people change dogs change
but did you ever read %bookname%
Wendy! *** how is it going? stuart *** fellow.
Wendy: Mike this isn't stuart.
Mike: Wendy wendy wendy, who would this be if this is not stuart?
Wendy: I don't know, Mike, but this dog changes its colors when he gets wet. Stuart will never
Mike: Eh you know there's an article about this in the paper it says pets are changing colors
said that acid rain.
Jason: Mike look.
Mike: *** cincinnati that turns purple the thing is perfectly normal i have the article upstairs
i'll go and get it.
Jason: Mike stop, sit. What did you do to stuart?
Mike: I lost him. Look, I looked everywhere but I couldn't find him. Wendy I would have told
you the truth but then I ask myself what is truth. Was it honesty was it pain and grieving or
is it the smile on a beautiful girl's face. I guess you know what I think the truth is.
Jason: Then you took a white dog and you dyed him black?
Mike: Hey, when somebody leaves a black dog with Mike seaver they'll get a black back
Jason: Wendy I am really sorry about all of this. I know how much you must've loved stuart.
Jason: Are you kidding who got to love stuart my family went on a vacation to get away from
Wendy: But I love this dog, he's so sweet I think I'll name it Mike. No, make that mikepo.
Mike: Did you hear that dad? She's gonna name it mikepo.
Wendy: I'll see you at night, bye.
Mike: Yeah, ok bye. Well it's my lesson, I'll never do that again.
Jason: No you won't Mike, because you're grounded for the rest of your life.
Mike: Dad ....
Jason: And a month after that.
Maggie: What's with Mike?
Jason: I just ground him for life
Maggie: Honey what's wrong?
Carol: Dad, you're not going to believe what Melissa told me?
Carol: Melissa told me Mark told kevin that I sweat a lot.
Jason: Well sweetheart didn't we decide yesterday that Melissa's really not that reliable
resource?Carol: Yeah but everything's different now dad, I mean, the whole thing is blown
wide open. You see Melissa said that she...
Jason: Wait you know this this would be the good one to run by the old prom here.
Carol: Ok! But then I talk to Mark he said he never even said that or the gummy bear thing,
Maggie: Mark, who's mark?
Carol: *** cathy tells me she was right there when mark tells kevin that I do sweat a lot.
Maggie: Honey could you tell me who mark is and what's happened yesterday?
Carol: Mum this is nothing to do with how happened yesterday. The point is I don't know
whether to trust Melissa or Mark as Cathy says
Jason: Wait wait wait sweetheart, you said that cathy also had a thing for kevin
Carol: Yes, so?
Jason: Well that doesn't make cathy a very reliable resouce either
Carol:Oh, god damn it this means everybody's ***
Jason: Hey maggie wait.
Carol: Dad, this is just not fair.
Jason: Honey, look, if kevin's really worth caring for then he's gotta make up his own mind,
Carol: I guess he already has 'cause he didn't ask me to the dance dad..
Jason: Maggie don't be mad, Carol's just upset she didn't mean to exclude you
Maggie: I am not mad I am just tired of people takeing things out of the cabinet not putting
back to where they belong.
Jason: But what are you looking for ?
Maggie: I don't know.
Jason: *** mango *** we finished in 1982, come on, maggie, I know what you're feeling.
Maggie: You do not have any idea what I am feeling, doctor seaver,
Jason: Hey look.
Maggie: No, you may know what kevin Mark and Melissa feeling but you do not know what I
Jason: Maggie..I tried to include you
Maggie: Oh don't patronize me jason throwing me a bone calling me old *** maybe a few
years you can bring me back for old timers day.
Jason: We talked about all of this I just happen to be the guy who is here the day the whole
gummy bear thing exploded in our faces.
Maggie: It's not just the gummy bears jason it's the whole past 3 months the way you've
been pampering the children making ben's favourate chololate chip cookies
Jason: Oh what's wrong with that
Maggie: What's wrong with that? what wrong with that you're edging me out of my children's
Jason: Edging you wow is that what you think?
Maggie: I don't know, you are the expert why don't you tell me what i think
Jason: Ok I think you feel guilty about going back to work
Maggie: Of course I do.
Jason: And I *** you want to be here to spend time with the kids
Maggie: Of course, I do.
Jason: And I think you want me to be good at it
Maggie: Of course I do.
Jason: But you don't want me to be as good as yours
Maggie: Of course I do.
Maggie: Well, maybe I don't.
Jason: You know maggie I was at work when ben took his first step and when carol spoke her
first sentence and when mike committed his illegal act
Jason: I missed up and all that and now i had the chance to be closer to the kids spend more
time then you be *** that
Maggie: Oh jason i don't.
Jason: No maybe you do i know that feeling too, because it's time that goes and never comes
back. They grow up and it hurts.
Maggie: Yeah it hurts.
Jason: Are you sorry went back to work? you wanna come home?
Maggie: No I don't I guess I guess I just want to have it all but you can't ....how's carol.
Jason: Well she's not going to the dance with kevin.
Maggie: Oh no that's too bad.
Jason: Yeah but she does have a chance at another day that she was pretty excited about.
Maggie: Really, who will?
Jason: I don't know exactly but she said something about %the name mentioned above%
Jason: Yeah were not originally there.
Ben: Help help stuart's back.
Maggie: Look why's the ***
Ben: She is playing dead.
Mike: His grandma %same as above%.
Jason: She is dead.
Ben: oh that's wacky sturgeons.
Jason: Look they're all dead.