Messer: They definitely didn't think this through.
Holly: We need to establish a sleep schedule. It's very important.
Holly: I guess. What? What did you say?
Messer: I said they didn't think any of this through. Did Pete say anything to you about this? Or Alison? 'Cause they didn't tell me anything about this.
Messer: This is not the kind of thing you just forget to mention. "Hey, you see that game where Kobe put the juke on that dude then hit the fadeaway jumper? Oh, and by the way, if I die, I'm gonna leave you with my kid." It's messed up.
Holly: Alison was a planner. We are part of a plan.
Messer: You wanna walk me through this plan? Are we supposed to live in this house together? Share the place, both sleep-deprived? Because that sounds like a compelling psych experiment. Assuming you and I can even afford to pay for this place.
Holly: Dunn said the mortgage is covered.
Messer: Well, what about the upkeep? Or the utilities or the taxes? You have any idea what the nut on a place like this is a month? Pete was a junior partner at a law firm. I don't make this kind of cash. And what do you do? You bake scones for a living?
Holly: I run a successful business, Messer. I do pretty well for myself actually.
Messer: Yeah? Well, running a baby is not like running a bakery.
Holly: I didn't say it was.
Messer: They're a mess. They pee on things. They bite. They're basically dogs. Except at least a dog knows not to lick the electrical sockets.
Holly: She's up. She's up. Okay, honey. Hey. Hi.
Messer: Hey. Hey, look at the sleepyhead.
Holly: Hi, honey.
Messer: Here we go. Hey, come here.
Holly: No, no, don't pick her up.
Holly: Because she needs to learn how to self-soothe. This is really important.
Messer: She needs to what?
Holly: Self-soothe. Soothe herself. I just read it, Messer. It's important. Let's just give it a minute. Everything's okay. Happy, happy girl. You know what? Let's just sing a song. We'll sing a song. [Singing] The wheels on the bus go round and round...
Holly & Messer: Round and round. Round and round. The wheels on the bus go round and round. All through the town.
Holly: The-- I don't know.
Messer: And then Keanu Reeves saves the bus.
Holly & Messer: Saves the bus. Saves the bus. And then Keanu Reeves saves the bus.
Holly: And then he dies.
Messer: That's all I got.
Holly: Does he die? I don't know. Okay. Maybe she's hungry. I think she's hungry. I'm gonna feed her. Hi. Come on, let's go eat. Come on.
Messer: I thought we weren't picking her up.
Holly: Okay, Sophie girl, I'm almost done, hold on.
Messer: She's not a food critic. She's a 1-year-old.
Holly: I know that, Messer. I'm not gonna feed her just anything.
Messer: But we're gonna feed you sometime today, Sophie, I promise. Hopefully before you're 2. So tell me, what does Sophie do to your dreams of ever meeting a guy and having your own baby? You ever thought about that? A woman your age already has a hard time competing for the few guys out there who don't suck.
Holly: I'm sorry, did you just say a woman my age?
Messer: In the dating world, you wouldn't be considered single. You know that? You know what you'd be? Complicated. Beyond complicated.
Holly: You don't know anything about me, Messer.
Messer: Well, I know that you can't open a childproof drawer. Oh. There it is.
Holly: Why are you trying so hard to convince me not to help her?
Messer: I'm not trying to convince you not to help her. I'm just trying to do what's best for her.
Holly: You're trying to do what's best for you.
Messer: I'm trying to do what's best for her. OK? And you know what? We're not it.
Holly: They loved Sophie more than anything in the entire world, and out of everyone, Messer, they picked us. They picked us. I'm coming. Check this out. I think you're gonna love it. Taste sensation. Ready? Mmm. No? Come on. Just try it, Soph. Just try it. I think you're gonna love it. Just try it. Come on, Soph, give it a try. Oh, please? I've seen you eat things like this. I think you're gonna love it. Come on. Mmm. Mmm. Yum, yum, yum. There you go. Good girl, Soph--
Messer: So you honestly think we're the best thing for her?