Julian: Good morning, Marley,
Marley: Oh, really. Is it? I'm about to get a huge camera stuck up my butt. So I don't know if that qualifies as good.
Julian: I just need you to sign this document which states that you understand all the colonoscopy's risks, which include heavy bleeding, uh, infection, perforation, rupture.
Marley: On a scale of one to ten, one being 'never' and ten being 'happens all the time', what are the chances of you rupturing my ass?
Julian: Well, not. The chances are very slim. It's, uh, more procedural.
Marley: Good, well, procedure away, my friend. This is gonna be fun.
Julian: Would you mind rolling onto your left side, please. Thanks.
Marley: Wait a minute. Before we go to whatever base this is we're going to, um, shouldn't I know your first name?
Marley: Julian. Julian Goldstein. My hero. Where the hell am I?
God: Hello, Marley.
Marley: Oh, my God. Wait a minute, Oh, my God. I mean... Are you God?
God: Not really. This is just the way you wanted to see me.
Marley: Well, I love Whoopi, so that's probably why.
God: Yeah, me too. Oh, have a seat.
Marley: I can't believe this.
God: Guess what? You're dying.
Marley: I am not dying. I'm just a little stressed, that's all.
God: Marley? You're dying, but I'm gonna give you three wishes.
Marley: Then I want to fly.
God: Okay. Done.
Marley: Wait a minute. This is for real? I want a million bucks.
God: Alright, but I just have to warn you that that is only gonna be 500,000 after taxes.
Marley: Just 'cause I didn't say 'tax free'?
God: Even I don't mess with the IRS.
Marley: That sucks.
God: Third wish?
Marley: Okay. Let me think,
God: Tic-toc, baby.
Marley: Don't rush me. Jesus.
God: Hey, hey, Wow.
Marley: I'm sorry.
God: You said it, didn't you?
Marley: Yeah, I did. I don't know. I don't know what I want.
God: You know. You just don't want to admit it. But I'm pretty sure that if you give it some thought, you'll figure it out.
Julian: Marley. Marley. Marley, wake up, It's over.
Marley: What's over? Where am I? Where's Whoopi?
Julian: The procedure went fine. We're going to move you to the recovery room now. I took some biopsies. We should get results in a few days.