欲望都市第二季 残酷的真相 The Awful Truth

[00:00.00] 12.08.02 08:26:16 [00:02.00]听美剧学英语(MP3+LRC) [00:12.28]欲望城市 [00:38.00](性爱专家凯莉布雷萧) [00:45.08]，残酷的真相 [00:48.56]Two years ago, my frlend Susan Sharon... 两年前，我朋友苏珊雪伦 [00:51.100]...the East Coast rep for a llne of Itallan cashmere sportswear... 意大利喀什米尔羊毛运动服 东岸代理商 [00:57.68]...marrled a mean man. 嫁给一个脾气非常暴躁的男人 [00:58.08]What did I teII you about Iistening to my CDs? 我跟你说过听完CD要怎样? [01:02.56]You put NataIie ImbrugIia back in U2! 你把娜塔莉放到U2的盒子里了 [01:05.52]Now, I only see her once or twlce a year... 现在我跟她每年只见一两次面 通常是当她丈夫出城的时候 [01:08.72]...generally when her husband ls out of town. [01:11.92]Now, I can't remember if I've taken my HaIcion before dinner or not. 我不记得晚餐前 是否吃过安眠药 [01:14.20]So I take another one, I have a cocktaiI, I'm feeIing no pain. 所以我又吃了一颗 喝了杯鸡尾酒，不觉得痛苦 [01:18.80]The next thing I know, this freaked out stewardess is sIapping me awake. 接下来我只知道 空姐正赏我巴掌，想把我打醒 [01:22.32]“夫人…到了…” [01:26.72]I open my eyes, I Iook around the pIane, it's compIeteIy empty. 我睁开眼睛环顾机舱 人都走光了 [01:31.52]-We'd Ianded in MiIan 30 minutes ago. -My God. -飞机半小时前在米兰降落了 -我的天 [01:35.40]Come up to my apartment because I have something for you. 我要送你一个礼物 [01:39.92]The pIace Iooks fantastic! -这里看起来好气派 -小声一点，理查睡着了 [01:43.12]Richard's asIeep. [01:45.40]In here? 在…?好的 [01:47.28]Susan Sharon and her husband had one of those very adult apartments... 苏珊雪伦和她丈夫的公寓 装潢得好讲究 [01:52.56]...that made me feel llke I was 16 vlsltlng the home of a frlend... 我觉得自己像个16岁少女 [01:54.16]...whose parents thought I was a bad lnfluence. 去朋友家玩，她父母却认为 我会带坏他们的孩子 [01:58.72]Happy birthday, Carrie. 生日快乐，凯莉… [02:02.92]You didn't have to. -我知道还没到 -天啊 [02:05.00]I know it's a IittIe earIy. [02:11.68]It's beautifuI. -苏珊雪伦，好漂亮 -这是百分之百喀什米尔羊毛 [02:13.24]It's 100 percent ItaIian cashmere and Iight as a feather. [02:17.20]God, I Iove it. -轻得像羽毛一样 -我好喜欢，这是金钱的奇迹 [02:18.52]It's a ''cashmere-icaI.'' [02:21.08]-Guess what Barneys gets for this. -Don't teII me. 你知道巴尼百货卖多少钱? 九百块 [02:23.28]-$900. -$900 for a scarf? No. 九百块一条围巾?不会吧… [02:29.04]-Do you mind if I return it? I need cash. -Why not? 我可以拿去退吗? 换现金比较实在 [02:33.92]Why do you think they caII it ''cash-mere''? 有何不可?你以为它为什么 又称做“全是钱”? [02:38.88]-What the heII is going on? -Sorry, honey. -到底在搞什么鬼? -抱歉，亲爱的，凯莉想到… [02:42.28]-But Carrie had this idea about returning-- -What... [02:45.68]...was our agreement about visitors after 9:00 p.m.? 我们对于九点以后接待访客 定了什么协议? [02:48.64]-I know, it's her birthday. -I'm on London time! -我知道，但她生日快到了… -我的作息是以伦敦时间为准 [02:50.92]I've got to be up in three hours when the markets open. 再过三小时开市，我就得起床 [02:54.00]I'd reaIIy appreciate it if you'd take the fucking noise somewhere eIse. 拜托你们去别的地方狂欢 我会感激不尽 [02:59.16]-I'II caII you. -Just ignore him. You don't have to Ieave. -我再打电话给你 -别理他… [03:03.12]It's okay. 没关系… [03:09.68]-Goodnight, Grumpy. -Get the fuck out of my house! -晚安 -滚出去 [03:10.20]Tauntlng the psychotlc spouse, I reallzed, was not a wlse move. 跟神经质的另一半争执 是不明智的 [03:14.36]Just shut the fuck up! 你给我闭嘴 [03:21.04]I wondered... 她的婚姻真有那么糟 还是吵架只是前戏的形式? [03:22.44]...could thelr marrlage be that bad, or was thelr flghtlng a form of foreplay? [03:25.12]In whlch case, I was merely the catalyst to get thlngs golng. 无论如何 我的角色只不过是催化剂 [03:38.12]I am so sorry. -喂? -对不起，我觉得好丢脸 [03:40.00]I'm so embarrassed. [03:39.32]Don't be. 没有必要，他只是疲倦而暴躁 [03:40.72]He's just tired and cranky. [03:43.100]That was cIassic Richard: 那就是典型的理查 专制跋扈以及情绪化的辱骂 [03:45.08]TyrannicaI, emotionaIIy abusive. I don't know what to do anymore. [03:48.24]-我不知道该拿他怎么办 -也许今晚的事… [03:51.88]Maybe there were speciaI circumstances tonight. [03:55.56]He works hard. He's sIeep deprived. 他工作卖力、睡眠不足… 我才不在乎 [03:55.00]BIah, bIah, bIah. I don't give a shit! [04:02.68]What wouId you do? WouId you Ieave? -若是你会怎么做?离开吗? -如果情况没有改善的话 [04:04.76]If things didn't change.... [04:07.68]They haven't, and they won't. 情况的确没改善，也不会改善 [04:13.12]Do you think I shouId Ieave him? -你认为我该离开他吗? -如果你不快乐，人生很短暂 [04:16.00]If you're not happy, you know, Iife's too short. [04:20.60]I gotta go. -我得挂线了 -挂掉电话之际我意识到 [04:21.88]As I hung up, I reallzed I had been placed ln a classlc no-wln sltuatlon. [04:22.44]自己刚陷入一个 吃力不讨好的处境 [04:25.76]TeIIing a friend to Ieave her husband is something you just don't do. 你绝不能劝朋友离开她的丈夫 [04:30.80]If they do break up, it's your fauIt. 如果她真的跟他分手 那便是你的错 [04:31.40]If they don't, she knows you think they shouId... 如果没分手，而她知道 你的想法，可能会跟你绝交 [04:34.68]...and therefore, can't speak to you again. You're screwed. [04:38.76]-不管怎样，倒霉的都是你 -可惜，喀什米尔的通路断了 [04:39.16]It's a shame. There goes your cashmere connection. [04:41.76]She had me at a weak moment. I was tired, I'd been chased out of her apartment. 她在我脆弱的时刻找上我 我累了 [04:46.44]I have a birthday Iooming. 我生日快到了，我太多话了 [04:49.88]-I said too much. -No, in an intimate reIationship... 不，在一段亲密关系中 你应该要能畅所欲言 [04:53.48]-...you shouId be abIe to say anything. -I disagree. [04:55.68]PracticaIIy aII the reIationships I know are based on a foundation of Iies... 我不同意 [04:56.24]我知道的恋情几乎都建筑在 谎言的基础上 [04:59.96]...and mutuaI deIusion. 而且彼此都接受欺瞒 好比说我和詹姆斯 [05:03.04]James and me, for instance. I pretend he doesn't have a smaII dick. [05:05.44]我假装他的命根子并不小 [05:07.52]He pretends not to notice we haven't had sex in weeks. 而他假装没注意到 我们已经三个礼拜没做爱了 [05:09.88]You shouId join the U.N. -你应该替联合国工作 -我现在有交往对象 [05:12.76]I'm in an intimate reIationship at the moment... [05:15.24]...and I can teII you, the IeveI of verbaI discourse has become a IittIe too intimate. 口头对话的程度 已经变得有点过于亲密 [05:19.52]-Are we speaking of Spring RoII Guy? -Who's that? -你是指春卷先生? -他是谁? [05:22.60]Aaron MeIman. 艾宁莫门，我吃越南菜时 认识的皮肤科医生 [05:23.88]He's a dermatoIogist I met at the Vietnamese Iunch truck outside my office. [05:29.96]What's the probIem? -问题出在哪里? -问题出在… [05:29.04]The problem, lf you can call lt that... [05:31.84]...ls Sprlng Roll Guy llked to talk dlrty ln bed. 春卷先生喜欢在床第间 口出淫语 [05:35.64]Baby, I just Iove the way your pussy feeIs. 宝贝，我就爱你阴道的触感 [05:40.08]So wet... 那么湿润、温暖而紧实 [05:41.88]...and warm... [05:40.92]...and tight. [05:44.68]Kissing your beautifuI tits feeIs unbeIievabIy sexy. 亲吻你美丽的乳房 觉得难以置信的性感 [05:49.08]So hot and nasty. -火辣又淫秽，感觉如何? -你说得对 [05:51.92]How's it feeI to you? [05:53.24]What you said. [05:56.40]That can be a turn on. -那会让人欲火焚身 -当然 [05:58.12]Sure, but now he wants me to reciprocate. 但现在他希望我回报 我做不到，我从不来这一套 [05:59.68]I can't. I never couId. [06:02.88]Why not? -为什么? -因为做爱时不适合聊天 [06:04.68]Because sex is not a time to chat. [06:05.64]It's one of the few instances in my overIy articuIated, exceedingIy verbaI Iife... 这是我终日滔滔不绝 发挥伶俐口才的生活中 [06:11.04]...where it is perfectIy appropriate, if not preferabIe, to shut up. 少数可以不必说话的时机 [06:16.88]Now I have to worry about being stumped for conversation? 现在我却得为此大伤脑筋? [06:17.68]No, thank you. [06:18.96]Just taIk about his big cock. -一直赞美他粗大的那话儿 -更正，他粗大好看的那话儿 [06:22.04]Correction, his big, beautifuI cock. [06:24.36]-We're using the ''C'' word now? -Sorry. -现在流行说那话儿了? -我没办法加上形容词 [06:26.20]-I can't use adjectives. -A simpIe, ''You're so hard,'' is effective. 一句简单的“你好硬” 通常十分有效 [06:30.08]-Sometimes men need encouragement. -Such as? 有时候男人需要一点鼓励 [06:35.20]You know.... -譬如说? -你知道的， “没错” [06:36.48]''Yes, stud, that's right. [06:38.72]''Don't stop, just Iike that. C'mon, fucker, don't stop.'' “不要停，就是那样 快点，不要停” [06:43.92]You're kidding, right? -你在开玩笑吧? -不，他们很喜欢 [06:46.20]No, they Iike it. [06:49.56]So, are you reaIIy teIIing us... 你的意思是 做爱时你完全沉默不语? [06:50.80]...that during sex you're compIeteIy mute? [06:55.36]No, I can do a good orgasm aIert. 不，我在高潮前会有反应 [06:56.44]''I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum.'' “我快到了…” 但那是因为我真的快到了 [06:60.60]But that's because I'm gonna cum. [07:03.88]Anything eIse feeIs Iike make beIieve. 其他的话感觉上都很虚伪 [07:06.00]If you reaIIy Iike this guy, you're gonna have to start taIking. 如果你真的喜欢他 你就得开始淫声浪语了 [07:10.44]Was Mlranda rlght? 米兰达是对的吗? 我们如此强调坦白和诚实 [07:13.44]Have we put such a premlum on belng open and honest wlth one another... [07:16.80]...that we've mlsplaced the boundarles of proprlety? 以至于跨越了礼貌的界线吗? [07:19.68]Are there stlll certaln thlngs ln a relatlonshlp one should never say? 感情世界里是否仍有某些 绝不能说出口的话? [07:22.68]My best friend got engaged to the biggest Ioser. 我最好的朋友跟一个 我所见过最没用的窝囊废订婚 [07:25.28]What am I supposed to say? ''You're marrying an imbeciIe?'' 我该说什么? “你要嫁给一个笨蛋”? [07:29.36]My wife, she's had her breasts done twice. 我太太动了两次胸部整形手术 看起来很棒，但触感极差 [07:31.20]They Iook fantastic, they feeI Iike shit. [07:36.48]I keep that thought to myseIf. 这我没告诉她 [07:38.72]I'm singIe, 38, and stiII hoping to get married. I don't want to know the truth. 我单身，38岁，还抱着 结婚的希望，我不想听实话 [07:44.68]I toId Richard I couIdn't spend another day married to a man who is an utter asshoIe. 我告诉理查我无法和一个 蛮横的男人做夫妻 [07:49.12]There lt was, standlng across from me. 她来了，吃着饼干 [07:51.92]Blscottl-eatlng, cashmere-swaddled proof that I had sald too much. 证明我太多话的女人 站在我面前 [07:56.08]-Then what happened? -Once I said that, the fIoodgates opened. -发生什么事了? -话匣子一开便不可收拾 [07:59.04]He said that at our wedding, when he Iooked at me... 他说在我们的婚礼上 他看着我 [08:01.48]...he feIt a huge wave of disappointment because I Iooked so generic. 觉得很失望 因为我长相如此平凡 [08:05.84]I said, ''On second thought... 我就说“再想一想，我觉得 生发剂对你根本没效” [08:08.64]''...I don't think the Rogaine is working.'' [08:08.72]He said that if I Ieave, aII he'II feeI for me is pity... 他说如果我离开 他对我只会感到同情 [08:13.60]...because he'II be remarried within a year and I'II be singIe for the rest of my Iife. 因为他会在一年内再婚 而我将孤独终老 [08:16.24]I dldn't want to tell Susan Sharon that hls last statement was probably true. 我不想告诉她 那句话可能是事实 [08:21.16]I just feeI Iike I owe you so much. 我真的要好好谢谢你 [08:24.32]If it wasn't for you, I wouIdn't have had the guts to do this. 要不是你 我不会有勇气这么做 [08:28.60]It's Iike I was under house arrest for years and now I'm free. 过去几年我好像被软禁一样 现在我自由了 [08:34.76]What are you gonna do? 你打算怎么办? [08:36.56]Do you mind if I stay at your pIace? -今晚我能住你家吗? -当然可以 [08:37.16]Of course not. [08:40.84]That evenlng, as Susan Sharon squatted on my couch... 当晚苏珊雪伦占据了我的沙发 [08:44.08]...Charlotte came home to the new male ln her llfe. 而夏绿蒂回家拥抱 她人生中的新男性 [08:46.08]Fed up wlth lonely mornlngs, cuddle-free nlghts... 她受够寂寞早晨、孤枕难眠的 夜晚和缺乏无条件的爱 [08:50.88]...and the lack of uncondltlonal love she longed for... [08:53.36]...Charlotte took matters lnto her own hands. 夏绿蒂决定 一切要掌握在自己手中 [08:55.00]She combed the clty for the perfect speclmen of breedlng, style and trendlness. 她搜遍全市寻找完美的物种 [08:60.08]有教养、体面又时髦 [09:01.48]Henry, I'm home. 亨利，我回家了 [09:04.96]Hi, my good boy. 小乖乖，亨利，好狗儿 [09:09.96]Untll she found the perfect man, Charlotte would have the perfect dog. 在找到完美的男人以前 夏绿蒂先养只完美的狗 [09:17.12]That nlght, Samantha, who was never good at keeplng a secret... 那晚 向来不擅长保守秘密的莎曼珊 [09:18.100]...found the one thlng she couldn't say was the only thlng she could thlnk about. 发现她不能说出口的话 却一直盘据在她脑海 [09:25.28]Sweetheart, is anything wrong? If there is, I want you to teII me. 甜心，有什么不对劲吗? 我希望你告诉我 [09:28.64]No, honey, I'm tired. -亲爱的，没有，我累了 -你变得好冷淡 [09:29.20]I feeI Iike you've become so distant, Iike you're upset with me about something. [09:33.08]I'm sorry. It's not you, it's me. -你好像在生我的气 -抱歉，跟你无关是我的问题 [09:37.40]I'm not upset about anything. 我没有在气任何事，你很好 [09:40.56]You're wonderfuI. [09:43.24]WiII you come see a coupIe's counseIor with me? 你愿意陪我去找感情顾问吗? [09:45.84]Samantha dreaded the shrlnk the way most people feared the dentlst. 莎曼珊畏惧心理医生的程度 就跟大部分人怕看牙医一样 [09:51.08]If it's reaIIy important to you-- -如果这真的对你很重要… -太好了 [09:52.36]Great. 晚安 [09:56.56]Goodnight. [09:57.48]She longed for the slmple days... 她突然渴望 感情空窗期的单身生活 [09:59.92]...of emotlonal unavallablllty and hot one-nlght stands. [10:00.24]以及火热的一夜情 [10:05.88]Meanwhlle, across town, Mlranda was appearlng as Ellza Doollttle... 与此同时 米兰达成了“窈窕淫娃”中的 [10:11.76]...ln My FiIthy Lady. 女主角依莉莎杜利朵 [10:13.16]I just Iove kissing this sensitive spot right here. 我好喜欢亲吻这边的性感带 [10:19.92]Do you Iike that? -你喜欢吗? -喜欢 [10:23.92]TeII me what you Iike. -告诉我你喜欢什么? -那个 [10:26.80]That. [10:29.68]You Iike my hand there, caressing your breast? 你喜欢我用手爱抚你的胸部吗 [10:33.12]Sure. -当然 -轻轻捏你的乳头? [10:34.52]GentIy pinching your nippIe. [10:37.84]Fine. 很好 [10:40.60]Kissing my chest. 亲吻我的胸膛 好舒服，那真的让我好兴奋 [10:40.32]That's hot. That reaIIy turns me on. [10:45.76]How's it feeI? -觉得怎么样?热吗? -热 [10:46.84]Hot? [10:48.24]Hot. [10:48.96]And? -还有呢? -胸毛浓密? [10:51.44]-Hairy? -God, you're getting me hard. 老天，你让我勃起了 [10:55.48]TeII me how it feeIs. -告诉我它是什么感觉 -大? [10:58.28]Big. [10:59.76]And? -还有呢? -硬 [11:03.48]Hard? [11:06.12]-Rock hard. -Keep taIking. -像石头般硬 -对，说下去 [11:09.52]A big rock. -大石头… -很好 [11:13.60]A hard rock. 坚硬的石头 [11:14.16]A big, hard rock. -一个坚硬的大石头 -太好了 [11:20.24]-A sausage. -Baby, you are so nasty. -一根香肠 -宝贝，你真下流 [11:23.12]Surprlslngly, once Mlranda opened her mouth, lt was dlfflcult to shut up. 出乎意料地，米兰达一开了口 就发现很难闭嘴 [11:26.72]A big, throbbing, rock-hard sausage. 一根巨大、会震动 石头般坚硬的香肠 [11:32.28]That nlght, I took Susan Sharon to meet the new male ln Charlotte's llfe. 那天晚上我带苏珊雪伦 去见夏绿蒂生命中的新男性 [11:36.68]True to form, he was already falllng far short of her hlgh expectatlons. 一如往常 它已经远低于她的高期望 [11:41.24]He did it a minute ago. -一分钟前它做得到 -它反覆无常 [11:44.92]He was lnconslstent... [11:45.92]Get the baII. -去捡球 -自私、固执 [11:47.72]...selflshly stubborn, and hopelessly codependent. -而且无可救药地相互依赖 -它很聪明吧? [11:52.20]Isn't he smart? 我们不该待太久 我想回去以免理查打电话来 [11:52.08]We can't stay, I want to be at your pIace if Richard caIIs. [11:56.16]Aren't you Ieaving him? 你不是离开他了? [11:58.76]If he caIIs, I want to say I won't taIk to him. 没错，但我想告诉他 我不想跟他说话 [11:60.44]That's passive aggressive. You shouId onIy taIk if you have something to say. 那是消极的主动 真的有事要说才跟他讲话 [12:04.88]-Do you beIieve I married a prick? -You didn't know he was a prick. -我嫁给一个混帐 -当时你不知道他是个混帐 [12:10.84]I just can't beIieve that prick hasn't caIIed. 我不敢相信那混帐还没打来 [12:11.56]AIthough, he does have this sweet side. You just don't know him very weII. 他确实有温柔的一面 你跟他不熟 [12:16.00]Did I do the right thing, Henry? ShouId I give him another chance-- 你认为我做对了吗?亨利? 还是我应该给他… [12:19.40]He's a dog, not an oracIe. 它是一只狗，不是先知 [12:27.16]The next mornlng, I woke up to an unsettllng blrthday surprlse. 隔天早上起床，我收到一个 令人不安的生日惊喜 [12:32.24]Coming. 来了 [12:39.80]Sign here. 在这里签名 [12:42.60]Thank you. 谢谢 [12:54.20]My God. 我的天 [12:55.68]''Best wishes on your birthday.'' -“诚挚献上生日祝福” -是大人物送的 [12:56.80]It's from Big. -什么花? -红玫瑰 [12:58.48]-What kind of fIowers? -Roses, red. [13:02.56]Big. 一大束，很贵 你们觉得那是什么意思? [13:04.72]Expensive. [13:05.24]-What do you think it means? -It means rip up the card. -表示“把卡片撕碎” -小心花上的刺 [13:07.100]And watch out for the thorns. [13:09.08]No, this is the grand gesture. -不，这是个重大的宣示 -重大的宣示? [13:14.68]The grand gesture? [13:15.88]If you break up, and he disappears from your Iife... 若你和某人分手而他就此消失 那么你们真的不该在一起 [13:20.84]...it wasn't meant to be. [13:20.84]But if they make a powerfuI decIaration of their Iove, then you have to reconsider. 但若他做出强有力的爱情宣示 你就得重新考虑了 [13:24.80]You think a dozen roses and a card saying, ''Best wishes'' quaIifies as a grand gesture? 一束玫瑰花加上祝福卡片 就成了重大宣示? [13:31.36]You know men. They can never say, ''I was wrong.'' They just send fIowers. 男人绝对不会说“我错了” 他们送花来道歉 [13:34.84]Sometimes a rose is just a rose. -有时候玫瑰就只是玫瑰 -如果是珠宝…那就另当别论 [13:36.24]JeweIry, that's another story. [13:40.12]Henry, no. 不行，亨利，不可以咬皮包 [13:41.80]Henry, no, not the purse. [13:42.80]I reaIIy don't need this on my birthday. 我的生日不需要这个 那代表什么?轮到我发球? [13:46.92]What does this mean, the baII's in my court or something? [13:48.48]I don't want to pIay games. 我不想玩游戏 [13:51.56]This is not the grand gesture. This is the vague gesture... 这不是重大的宣示 这是暧昧的宣示 [13:55.12]...which is worse than no gesture. 比完全没宣示还糟 [13:57.80]Under the guise of thoughtfuIness, he's being very seIfish. -其实他一直很自私… -我同意，他存心捣乱… [13:60.52]I agree, he's muddied the waters. [14:01.60]You're aII just cuckoo. He sends fIowers on her birthday and you condemn him. 你们疯了 他在她生日时送花你们却骂他 [14:05.24]Henry, no. No, damn it. -亨利，不可以，该死… -饶了那只狗吧 [14:09.48]For chrissake, give the dog a break. [14:11.24]He's eaten four pairs of shoes. I don't want him starting on purses. 它已经咬烂我四双鞋 不能让它转移目标到皮包上 [14:13.80]Damn it, now. We're gonna go home. 该死，我们回家去 [14:15.08]You wanted to get out and sociaIize, but you'II have to Iearn to behave. 你想出来活动得先学好规矩 再见 [14:23.56]-你得学着听话… -说到发疯… [14:27.32]Speaking of cuckoo.... [14:27.72]Charlotte was at the polnt where she was startlng to see the real Henry. 夏绿蒂即将见识到 亨利的真面目 [14:33.40]But she dld ralse a valld questlon. 但她的确提出一个问题 “我错了”这句话 [14:36.72]Was, ''I was wrong,'' the one thlng Mr. Blg couldn't say? [14:36.96]真让大人物说不出口吗? [14:40.64]I reallzed that just because we were no longer together... 我们分手并不表示 我无法以礼相待 [14:43.36]...dldn't mean I couldn't be pollte. [14:48.24]It's me. -喂? -是我，凯莉 [14:51.88]Carrie. -你好吗? -很好 [14:53.12]How are you? [14:53.16]Great. I wanted to caII and thank you for the fIowers. 我想谢谢你送花给我 你真体贴 [14:58.84]That was thoughtfuI of you. [14:60.52]My secretary had it on her caIendar, so I, you know.... 我秘书记在她的行事历上了… [15:04.24]Your secretary sent them? 所以是你秘书送的? [15:07.12]I sent the fIowers, my secretary aIerted me to the day. 不，是我送的 她提醒我是今天 [15:13.20]That was very thoughtfuI of her and you for sending them. 你跟她都很体贴 [15:14.04]You're weIcome. What are you doing on the big day? 不客气，你今天要做什么? [15:19.12]Stanford's arranged this party down at LayIa, that Moroccan restaurant. 史丹佛要在那间摩洛哥式餐厅 举行派对，你应该来的 [15:24.32]You shouId come. 那些话一出口我就后悔了 [15:26.00]The lnstant the words popped out of my mouth, I regretted them. [15:27.60]-我已经有计划了… -不来没关系，无所谓 [15:31.36]I made pIans aIready. [15:33.84]Or not. I mean, just forget it. [15:35.76]I couId stop by Iater. -晚一点我可以去看看 -好，随便你 [15:38.72]Fine. Whatever. [15:40.40]I may bring someone. -我可能会带某个人去 -好… [15:44.00]Come and bring that person and maybe I'II see you Iater. 带那个人一起来 晚上见，再次谢谢你 [15:49.08]Thank you again for the thoughtfuI fIowers. [15:53.84]I couldn't belleve lt. 我刚邀请前任男友和他的女伴 来参加我的生日派对 [15:57.12]I had just lnvlted my ex and hls date to my blrthday party. [16:01.80]As lf gettlng older wasn't traumatlc enough. 仿佛老了一岁还不够悲惨似的 [16:02.24]That afternoon ln the offlce of Velma Rudln... 当天下午在费玛鲁丁的办公室 她是著名的心理学家 [16:06.36]...celebrated psychologlst and author of In-to-me-see... 也是“探索”这本书的作者 是配偶间亲密关系的指南 [16:10.04]...A CoupIe's Guide to Intimacy... [16:10.64]...Samantha dld her best not to say the thlng she knew she shouldn't say. 莎曼珊尽力克制自己不要说出 她知道不该说的话 [16:15.28]I've noticed that our sex Iife has diminished. -我们没有性生活了 -一切正常不是吗?过一阵子 [16:20.08]That's normaI, isn't it? I mean, after a whiIe-- [16:21.64]How Iong has it been? -多久了? -一个月 [16:24.64]A month. 别看得这么严重 好好享受性行为本身 [16:26.72]Don't take it aII so seriousIy. [16:29.24]Have fun with your sexuaIity. [16:32.00]Have you tried pIaying erotic games? -你们试过性爱游戏吗? -莎曼珊想坦白说 [16:33.36]Samantha almost confessed that James... [16:38.04]...had been playlng ''hlde the salaml'' slnce they met. 詹姆斯的命根子从他们 认识的那天起便一直玩捉迷藏 [16:39.72]I'm just not feeIing very sexuaI these days. 我只是最近没什么性欲 [16:45.60]I saw you masturbating the other day when I came out of the shower. 我洗澡出来时看到你在自慰 [16:49.00]Many women are simpIy unabIe to achieve orgasm through intercourse. 很多女人在性交时 无法达到高潮 [16:54.04]It's nothing to be ashamed of. -这没什么好难为情 -你对做爱有很大的障碍 [16:55.64]You have a probIem with intimacy. [16:57.52]No, that's not it. -不是那样 -不然是什么? [16:60.64]-What is it? -It's nothing. 没什么 [17:01.12]Nothing you say can hurt me, as Iong as it's what you're feeIing. 你有什么感受尽管说 我不会在意的 [17:06.68]That seems to be aII the time we have for today. 时间到了 [17:09.56]Nice work, you two. 不错，你们很努力 下周同一时间好吗? [17:10.76]ShaII we say next week, same time? [17:13.44]Good for me. 我可以，莎曼珊? [17:15.16]The ldea of seelng Velma ''In-to-me-see'' Rudln on a weekly basls... 想到每周固定 要向费玛鲁丁报到 [17:20.00]...was much more than Samantha could bear. 让莎曼珊无法忍受 [17:23.72]Your penis is too smaII. -你的命根子太小了 -你说什么? [17:24.56]Excuse me? 它不能… [17:27.44]It doesn't--and it just--it can't. [17:31.56]I can't. 我办不到 它…它实在是太小了 [17:32.100]It's just too damn smaII. [17:38.28]Did you ever stop to think that maybe your vagina is too big? 你有没有想过 也许是你的阴道太大了? [17:47.76]What can I say? I need a big dick. -我能说什么?我需要大老二 -我听到了 [17:50.00]I hear that. [17:52.48]As Samantha pald the prlce of mentlonlng the unmentlonable... 当莎曼珊为说了不该说的话 付出代价时 [17:56.36]...Mlranda dlscovered that free speech comes wlth a cost of lts own. 米兰达发现自由发言的代价 伴随着发言本身而来 [18:01.48]I just Iove putting my hand around your cock. 我喜欢把手放在你的那话儿上 [18:02.56]I just Iove hearing you say ''cock.'' -我喜欢听你说“那话儿” -你大而坚硬的那话儿 [18:06.52]Your big hard cock. [18:11.52]Cock, cock, cock. 那话儿… [18:12.76]Why couIdn't I ever say that before? 我以前为何说不出口? 它只不过是一个词 [18:15.96]It's just a word. [18:17.04]Why does it turn us both on when I say it? 为什么我说的时候 会让我们两个都兴奋起来? [18:22.16]What eIse do you Iike? -你还喜欢什么? -你粗鲁的方式 [18:22.20]I Iike it when you're rough. [18:24.20]When you throw my Iegs over your head, I Iose controI. 当你把我的双腿举高 跨过你的头时，我便失去控制 [18:29.52]What do I Iike? -我喜欢什么? -你喜欢我咬你的乳头 [18:31.56]You Iike it when I'm biting your nippIe. [18:35.04]What eIse? -还有呢? -你喜欢我亲吻你的蛋蛋 [18:36.72]You Iike it when I'm kissing your baIIs. [18:40.72]Keep going. 继续说 [18:44.88]You reaIIy Iike it when I sIip my finger in your ass. 你更喜欢我把手指 伸进你的屁眼 [18:52.56]Excuse me? -你说什么? -你喜欢手指在你的屁眼里 [18:51.36]You just Iove a finger in your ass. [18:60.12]How couId I know, ''You Iove a finger in your ass''... 我怎么知道 “你喜欢手指在你的屁眼里” [19:02.20]...is the one thing you can't say? 是不能在床上对男人说的话? [19:04.48]Trust me, that's not the onIy thing. -不只那句话 -可是他很享受 [19:06.36]-But it's true, he enjoys it. -So do a Iot of men. [19:09.36]They enjoy it, but don't want it brought to their attention. -很多男人都这样 -你不能提醒他们这一点 [19:12.92]PersonaIIy, I don't Iike anything in my ass. 我个人是不喜欢 屁眼里有任何东西 [19:16.100]I know that may come as a surprise. -我知道你们会很惊讶… -我觉得被出卖了 [19:18.60]I just feeI so betrayed. [19:21.16]He wanted me to taIk dirty, I got into it, then he puIIed the rug out from under me. 他试着要我讲些淫声浪语 [19:24.36]我学会了，然后他却把我推开 [19:27.92]Men are so frustratingIy inconsistent. That's why I Iove my Henry. 男人真是反覆无常 所以我才爱我的亨利 [19:29.40]He's a big Iove bug. You teII him anything and he Iicks your face. -它充满热情，还会舔我的脸 -你可能太着迷了 [19:33.60]CharIotte, you may be onto something. [19:37.00]Another doubIe vodka rocks for the birthday girI. 给寿星再来一杯 加冰块的双份伏特加 [19:39.24]The truth was, vodka was my only ally. 伏特加是我唯一的盟友 大人物随时会… [19:43.76]At any moment, Blg was gonna walk ln wlth hls gorgeous date... [19:45.92]...smlle at me llke some dlstant stranger and say somethlng crushlng-- 带着他迷人的女伴走进来 对我微笑说着… [19:50.08]Happy birthday, baby. 生日快乐，宝贝 [19:53.08]GIad you couId make it. -很高兴你能赶上 -无法待很久，骆驼在外面等 [19:56.24]I can't stay Iong. [19:56.48]I Ieft my cameI outside. [20:00.24]You remember Jack? -你记得杰克吧? -杰克?你要带的人就是他? [20:06.84]Jack is your date? -我没有意识到… -见到你真好 [20:07.40]I wasn't aware we were formaIIy dating, but-- [20:08.40]It is so good to see you again. [20:13.48]How have you been? -你最近怎么样? -妙不可言，婆娘伤了我的心 [20:12.96]MarveIous, I spIit up with a bitch who broke my heart. She didn't get my money. [20:16.12]-起码她没骗走我的钱 -祝我生日快乐 [20:17.16]Happy birthday to me. [20:28.76]An hour later, my Arabian Nights fantasy... 一小时后我“天方夜谭”式的 生日派对变成了“午夜快车” [20:34.16]...blrthday felt llke Midnight Express. [20:37.20]-How are you? -Great. -你好吗? -好极了，你呢? [20:38.80]How are you? [20:42.72]Good. Fine. -也很好 -那好 [20:42.76]Good. -你生日前男友来干嘛? -我邀他来喝杯东西 [20:45.60]Excuse me, what is your ex doing at your birthday? [20:48.88]I toId him to drop by for a drink. [20:50.04]I didn't think he'd stay for a Iap dance. 我没想到他会为了艳舞留下来 [20:53.36]My God, have you tried the baba ganooj? -你有没有吃过茄子沙拉? -我不吃茄子沙拉 [20:55.84]It is to die for. [20:55.20]I don't eat baba ganooj. [20:58.80]You don't know what you're missing. 你不知道错过了何等美味 [20:60.40]I can't beIieve the bastard dared to come. 我不敢相信他竟然有脸来 [21:04.36]I can't beIieve what she does with her naveI. 我不敢相信那女人的肚脐功夫 [21:06.44]PIease, I'm about to Iose my couscous. 我即将失去我的蒸丸子 [21:10.04]Whlle I watched my ex get a Mesopotamlan lap dance... 当我望着我的前男友 欣赏一场美索不达米亚式艳舞 [21:13.72]...Susan Sharon made a play for Mr. Marvelous. 苏珊雪伦对“妙不可言先生” 展开疲劳轰炸 [21:14.08]I can't deaI with being singIe aII over again. 我不知道能否再适应单身生活 我们的婚姻有高潮也有低潮 [21:18.20]Every reIationship has its ups and downs. [21:19.36]My husband and I work very hard. 我丈夫和我可能放假时 相聚的时间太少 [21:22.04]We probabIy don't spend enough damn time together. [21:23.72]Compounded by the fact that neither of us gets enough sIeep. Then again, who does? 我们两个都睡眠不足 话说回来，哪对夫妻不是如此 [21:29.44]I reaIIy never imagined myseIf as a divorcee, you know? 我从没想过自己会离婚 [21:33.92]It's more important to tiII your own soiI than to go in search of greener pastures. 耕耘自己的土壤 比寻找更青绿的牧草地重要… [21:40.44]Do you ever shut the fuck up? 你有没有闭嘴的时候? [21:43.52]In that moment, Susan Sharon reallzed she desperately mlssed her husband. 在那一刻她才发现 她有多么想念她的丈夫 [21:50.80]That nlght, Charlotte came home to a very unpleasant surprlse. 当天晚上夏绿蒂回家发现 一个非常不愉快的意外等着她 [21:57.84]天啊… [22:01.80]亨利… [22:03.52]Bad! 你这坏狗… [22:08.16]Charlotte reallzed, llke so many males before hlm... 跟之前的许多男人一样 亨利在她完美世界里到处拉屎 [22:09.96]...Henry had shlt all over her perfect world. [22:13.12]He and Charlotte soon parted ways. 它和夏绿蒂很快就分道扬镳 [22:15.12]The one thlng she could never say was, ''I got rld of the puppy.'' 而她永远不能说 “我把宠物赶走了” [22:18.00]We all know what happened to hlm. 我们都知道它后来的际遇为何 [22:22.72]He'd become the glue that put Susan Sharon and her husband back together. 它是苏珊和丈夫 重修旧好的大功臣 [22:26.00]Shut up. 闭嘴，快给我闭嘴 [22:26.56]Shut the fuck up. 虽然他们都不愿承认 一只狗救了他们的婚姻 [22:28.36]Although nelther of them could admlt that a dog saved thelr marrlage. [22:33.64]Later that evenlng, as my blrthday passed lnto the early hours of just another day... 我的生日派对结束时 已是凌晨时份 [22:38.92]...I found myself alone on the street wlth Mr. Blg. 我发现我和大人物两个人 单独在街上漫步 [22:41.00]Another year oIder. -又老了一岁 -却没长智慧 [22:42.20]And none the wiser. 人生就是如此 [22:44.16]That's the way it goes. [22:48.56]-Can I give you a ride home? -No, I'm just gonna grab a cab. -我送你回家好吗? -我搭计程车就行了 [22:52.00]-Do you need cab fare? -No, I'm okay. -需要计程车钱吗? -不用了，我有 [22:53.52]Good, because I think I Ieft aII my $20 in that beIIy dancer's crotch. 还好，我想我把所有20块 钞票都塞给那肚皮舞者了 [23:04.12]-那么? -那么? [23:08.64]Goodnight. 再见 [23:10.60]Goodnight. 再见 [23:32.44]As I watched hlm go, I reallzed the one thlng I couldn't say to Mr. Blg was... 看着他离去，我明白 我不能对大人物说的话是… [23:39.12]...''I'm stlll not over you.'' “我还是忘不了你”

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