华尔街的赚钱经 第12期:爱钱 更爱幸福(2)

Don't make money a top priority. People who say money is one of their most important goals score lower for mental health, according to a variety of studies conducted over the past decade by Dr. Tim Kasser, associate psychology professor at Knox College, and Dr. Richard Ryan, psychology professor at the University of Rochester. Money-seekers suffer a greater risk of depression; have more anxiety and lower self-esteem; experience more physical, behavioral and relationship problems; and score lower on indicators testing for vitality (feeling alive and vigorousl and self-actualization. The problems were not caused by being affluent but by making money a primary goal in life.

不要把钱当做头等重要的事情。根据诺克斯大学心理学副教授提姆·卡塞博士和罗切斯特大学心理学教授理查德·赖安博士在过去十几年来的研究结果显示，那些把钱当做重要目标之一的人在心理健康方面的得分是较低的。这些人一般更容易情绪消沉，常常焦虑，只有少得可怜的自尊，并会导致身体、行为举止和人际关系方面的诸多问题。他们在生命力(感觉活泼和精力旺盛)和自我完善的测试中，往往也得分较低。以上种种问题并不是因为富裕本身引起的，而是由于这些人把金钱当做了人生的首要目标。

Be conscious of how you talk about money. The way we explain things to ourselves has a big impact on our happiness, says author David Myers, professor at Michigan's Hope College. Instead of saying, "I can't afford it," say, "I choose to spend my money on other things. n Think of yourself as an empowered person making wise choices based on your values and priorities-instead of a self-pitying victim who views life in terms of what she can't have.

知道怎样谈论金钱。密歇根的霍普学院的教授作家大卫说，我们向自己说明一件事情的方式对我们的幸福有很大的影响。“我买不起”换一句话可说成“我想把钱花在其他东西上。”把自己想象成一个有能力按照自己的价值观和偏好做出明智选择的人，而不是那个不能左右生活的自怨自艾的可怜虫。

Focus on essential psychological needs. Money scored last on the list of psychological needs that create happiness and fulfillment, according to a study by Kennon Sheldon, psychologist at the University of Missouri——Columbia. What are the four most essential needs? Autonomy-feeling your actions are self-chosen and setf-endorsed, competence-feeling effective in what you do; self-esteem; and a sense of closeness with others. The University of Chicago's National Opinion: Research Center found that people with five or more close friends are 50 percent more likely to describe themselves as "very happy" than respondents with fewer friends.

注重必要的心理需求。据密苏里州哥伦比亚大学的心理学者肯尼·谢尔登的研究显示，在那些能够创造幸福和成就感的心理需求列表中，金钱排在最后一位。最为必要的4个需求是什么?自治一一感觉你的行动都是自己选择和自己认可的;能力——感觉自己所做得是有意义的;自尊;与他人亲密的感觉。芝加哥大学全国意见研究中心发现，那些拥有 5个或者更多亲密朋友的人比起那些朋友较少的人，在把自己描述为“非常快乐”的几率要高出50%。

Help others. Professor Lyubomirsky has done studies in which students Were asked to practice altruism, doing five acts of kindness a week for six weeks. The participants reported a significant rise in happiness. Kind acts, she says, not only make you feel better about yourself, but foster a sense of interdependence and cooperation.

帮助他人。柳博米尔斯基教授曾做过这样的研究，让他的学生去练习帮助他人，在一周内做5件善事，连续做6周。这些参与者报告说他们的幸福感显著提高了。她说，友善的行为不仅仅让你自我感觉更好，并且培养了互相帮助、合作的意识。