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生活英语听力文章:保持和家人的沟通

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2015年09月03日

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Connecting with Family 和家人的沟通

Author: Don Smith (Todd’s Father)

作者:Don Smith(Todd的父亲)

On this Father’s Day weekend, I am reminiscing about my family and the connectedness I am enjoying today. I am remembering past events that have contributed to my philosophy about what it takes to have a connected family.

在这个父亲节的周末,我回忆着我的家人,回忆着我今天所享受到的和家人在一起的点点滴滴。我回忆着一些有助于我的哲学的往事,这是关于一个联系紧密的家庭需要什么的哲学。

From my experience, I define connectedness as that place in any relationship where two people meet, find safety and respect in openness, know differences will not divide, and are valued and bound together by love and the freedom to be authentically one’s self.

从我的经验看来,联系可以定义为在任何关系下两个人相遇,找到安全感并且公开地尊重对方的地方,差异并没有引起隔阂而是被珍视,他们被爱和成为真正自我的自由紧紧地联系在了一起。

Influencing Generations Through Our Choices

我们的决定影响着后代

For the last 13 years I have been engaged in researching our family’s genealogy with my now 95-year-old brother. It has been an informative and rewarding pursuit providing me an enriched perspective on life and one’s contribution to future generations.

在过去的13年里,我一直在和我现在已经95岁的弟弟一起从事研究我们的家族族谱。这是一个有教育性意义并很值得的追求,它提供给我一个丰富的角度看生活,以及一个人对未来几代人的贡献。

From my genealogical research dating back to the 1500’s, I have concluded that not much, if anything, will be remembered about us personally beyond the third generation. But, our profound choices can and probably will have a “ripple” effect on generations to come. To illustrate, one line of ancestors chose to come to America on the Mayflower. Another chose to join in the fight for independence in the American Revolution, while another chose to remain loyal to the British Crown and moved to Nova Scotia. Choices, choices, choices! They have certainly impacted generations to follow. And I realize that my choices today could also have an impact on my descendents.

从我对追溯到十五世纪的宗谱学的研究中可以总结出,在超过第三代以后我们能记住的关于我们自己的事几乎没有。然而,我们那些影响深远的决定可以对后代们有 “涟漪效应”。举个例子来说,一队祖先们选择乘“五月花号”的邮轮来到美国,另一队选择飞去美国参与支持美国独立战争,与此同时还有一部分选择忠于英国王朝而搬去了加拿大。选择,选择,又一个选择!他们毫无疑问地影响了他们的后代。而且我意识到我今天的决定也同样对我的后代们有所影响。

Learning from Relationships

从人际关系中学习

When I was only 16 years old, my father died suddenly at age 66. I knew him as a quiet, honorable, and respected man. He indeed was a man of fine character, but we never “connected.” That relationship greatly influenced my intentions as a father. So I aspired to be like him—a man of integrity; but I also choose to be a father of intentional connectedness. I have four children and fourteen grandchildren. My relationship with each one is special, unique, and greatly treasured. I experience rewarding connectedness with each one.

当我只是16岁时,我爸爸突然过世,享年66岁。我知道他是一个安静、可敬和受人尊敬的人。他确实是一个好性格的人,但是我们从未“关联”。这种关系很大地影响了我作为一名父亲的意图。所以我虽然渴望像他一样——做一个正直的人;但我也选择成为一个特意与家人有关联的父亲。我有4个小孩和14个孙子女。我和每一个人的关系都很特殊,很独特,非常珍贵。我体验着和每一个人的有益的关联。

Passing the Baton

传递接力棒

Something else I am remembering this Father’s Day is the relay race at track and field events. While in high school I was a member of a relay team which competed in the two-mile relay. I was in the second position on the team for each event. I remember how much emphasis and importance our coach placed on the “hand off” of the baton. Actually the race could be won or lost depending on how well the first three relay members passed on the baton.

这个父亲节我所记得的其他事情还有小路上的接力赛和田赛。虽然在高中的时候,我是接力队的一员,这个接力队参加了一个2英里的接力赛。每一次比赛,我都站在队伍的第二个位置。我记得我们教练有多么强调和重视接力棒的传递。的确,比赛的成败可以决定于前三个接力队员在传递接力棒时做的如何。

I have drawn an analogy from that experience, reminding myself of the grave importance in passing on life’s baton to my children and grandchildren. For me, two special concerns remain:

我用这个经历做个类比,提醒我自己将生活的接力棒传递给我的儿女和儿孙时的巨大重要性。对我来说,有两个关注点:

1) What am I passing on?

我在传递什么?

2) How well am I making the “hand off?”

我做的“传递”如何呢?

Reaping a Grand Reward

获得一个巨大的回报

Finally I have come to realize there is a “gift exchange” between generations. The exchange begins with parents and grandparents who love, listen, and recognize with respect each child’s natural preferences and affirm his or her potential. Eventually the gifts of honor and gratitude will return from the children for years to come. That has been my cherished experience.

后来我意识到每一代之间都有一个“礼物交换”。这个交换始于父母和祖父母,他们尊敬地爱护、听取、意识到每一个孩子的天生癖好,并肯定他或她的潜能。最终,在未来几年后尊敬和感激的礼物会从孩子那儿反馈回来。这就是我珍贵的经验。

Are we a perfect family? By no means! But, we are on a journey together where faith, hope, and love are the atmospherics we breathe. We believe in one another, we desire and expect good things for one another, and we love and forgive one another. Is that always easy? Not at all! But it’s more than worth it.

我们是一个完美的家庭吗?绝不!但是,我们在一个能让我们呼吸信任、期望和爱之空气的旅程上。我们互相信任,互相祝福,互相爱护,互相宽恕。这样做总是很容易吗?一点也不。但这非常值得。

For me, being the father and grandfather in our family is one wonderfully rewarding journey. I salute my children and grandchildren for who they are and are becoming.

对于我来说,做我们家庭的父亲和祖父是一个非常有益的旅程。我为我的儿女和儿孙现在是谁、将成为谁而感到自豪。

I challenge you to resist trying to control others; accept each person for who they are. Engage in genuine listening and understanding. Be consistent in respect for one another. It almost always makes for treasured connectedness.

我冒昧劝你不要尝试去控制别人;接受每个人本身。做真正的倾听和理解。相互尊重。这样就可以促成宝贵的联系。

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