双语·《刀锋》 第六章 六

CHAPTER SIX 6
第六章 六

The waiter who had served us was going off duty and to get his tip presented the bill. We paid and ordered coffee.
伺候我们这张桌子的侍者要下班，急于拿到小费，便将账单送了过来。我们付了钱，又要了两杯咖啡。

“Well?”I said.
“后来怎么样了？”我问道。

I felt that Larry was in the mood to talk and I knew that I was in the mood to listen.
我觉得拉里有意要说，而我有心想听。

“Aren't I boring you?”
“你没有听烦吗？”

“No.”
“没有。”

“Well, we got to Bombay. The ship was stopping there for three days to give the tourists a chance to see the sights and make excursions.On the third day I got the afternoon off and went ashore.I walked about for a while, looking at the crowd：what a conglomeration！Chinese, Mohammedans, Hindus, Tamils as black as your hat；and those great humped bullocks with their long horns that draw the carts！Then I went to Elephanta to see the caves.An Indian had joined us at Alexandria for the passage to Bombay and the tourists were rather sniffy about him.He was a fat little man with a brown round face and he wore a thick tweed suit of black and green check and a clerical collar.I was having a breath of air on deck one night and he came up and spoke to me.I didn't want to talk to anyone just then, I wanted to be alone；he asked me a lot of questions and I'm afraid I was rather short with him.Anyhow I told him I was a student working my passage back to America.
后来，我们的船去了孟买，在那儿停留三天，让旅客们上岸游览风光或者做短途旅行。第三天下午，我不值班，于是上岸瞎转悠，东瞧瞧西看看。那儿人山人海，什么人都有——中国人、伊斯兰教徒、印度教徒以及肤色像你的帽子一样黑的泰米尔人。身躯庞大的公牛拉着车行走在大街上，一个个驼着背，头上的犄角老长！我还去了一趟象岛，参观了那儿的石窟。轮船行驶到亚历山大城的时候，曾有一个印度人上了船，是到孟买去的。乘客们都有些瞧不起他。他是个矮胖子，圆脸庞，棕色皮肤，穿一套黑绿两色格子的厚花呢衣服，围一条牧师的领子。有天晚上，我来到甲板上想透透气，他走过来跟我搭话。当时，我不想和任何人说话，只想自己待着。他连珠炮似的问了我一大堆问题，我却爱答不理。我告诉他，说我是个学生，来船上打工，挣点盘缠回美国去。

“‘You should stop off in India，'he said.‘The East has more to teach the West than the West conceives.'
‘你应该在印度待一待，’他说，‘西方有许多需要向东方学习的东西，多得超出了西方人的想象。’

“‘Oh yes?'I said.
‘是吗？’我说。

“‘At any rate，'he went on，‘be sure you go and see the caves at Elephanta. You'll never regret it.'”Larry interrupted himself to ask me a question.“Have you ever been to India?”
“‘不管怎样，’他继续说道，‘象岛的石窟你是必须要去看的。你一定会不虚此行。’” 拉里讲到此处，停下来问了我一个问题： “你去过印度吗？”

“Never.”
“没去过。”

“Well, I was looking at the colossal image with its three heads which is the great sight at Elephanta and wondering what it was all about when I heard someone behind me say：‘I see you've taken my advice.'I turned round and it took me a minute to realize who it was that had spoken to me. It was the little man in the heavy check suit and the clerical collar, but now he was wearing a long saffron robe, the robe, I knew later, of the Ramakrishna Swamis；and instead of the funny, spluttering little guy he'd been before, he was dignified and rather splendid.We both stared at the colossal bust.
后来我就去了象岛，站在那儿观看三头神巨像——那是岛上极为壮观的一景，心里在琢磨着它代表着什么。忽听身后有人说道：‘看来，你接受了我的建议。’我转过脸去，定了定神才认出了说话的人是谁——他就是那个穿厚花呢衣服、戴牧师领子的小个子。此时，他却穿一袭橘黄色长袍——事后我才知道，那是罗摩克里希纳教派的长老所穿的衣服。他已经不再是先前那个滑里滑稽、叽叽喳喳爱说话的小矮子了，而成了一个气宇轩昂的人物。我们俩都在观看那尊巨像。

“‘Brahma, the Creator，'he said.‘Vishnu the Preserver, and Siva the Destroyer. The three manifestations of the Ultimate Reality.'
‘一个是大梵天，司创造；’他说，‘一个是毗湿奴，司护持；还有一个是湿婆，司破坏。这三大神代表的是终极境界。’

“‘I'm afraid I don't quite understand，'I said.
‘我怕是听不懂你说什么。’我说道。

“‘I'm not surprised，'he answered, with a little smile on his lips and a twinkle in his eyes, as though he were gently mocking me.‘A God that can be understood is no God. Who can explain the Infinite in words?'
“‘这一点也不奇怪。’他嘴角带着一丝笑意回答道，同时挤了一下眼，仿佛在嘲笑我，你要是能吃得透上帝，那他就不是上帝了。谁又能解释得清什么是”无极呢？

“He joined the palms of his hands together and with just the indication of a bow strolled on. I stayed looking at those three mysterious heads.Perhaps because I was in a receptive mood, I was strangely stirred.You know how sometimes you try to recall a name；it's on the tip of your tongue, but you just can't get it：that was the feeling I had then.When I came out of the caves I sat for a long while on the steps and looked at the sea.All I knew about Brahminism were those verses of Emerson's and I tried to remember them.It exasperated me that I couldn't and when I went back to Bombay I went into a bookshop to see if I could find a volume of poetry that had them in.They're in the Oxford Book of English Verse.D’you remember them?
他双手合十，微微鞠了一躬，然后便扬长而去了。我待在原地继续观望那三个神秘的头像。我有一种醍醐灌顶的感觉，心里异常兴奋。你知道，有时候你回忆一个人的名字，那名字都到了嘴边了，可你就是叫不出来。我当时的感觉就是如此。出了石窟，我坐在台阶上瞭望大海，在那儿坐了很长时间。关于婆罗门教，我所有的知识都来自于爱默生的几句诗。我绞尽脑汁想把那几句诗背出来，但就是做不到，让我感到很恼火。回到孟买，我钻进一家书店，想看看有哪个诗集收入了那几句诗，结果在《牛津英诗选》里找到了它们。你能背得下来吗？

They reckon ill who leave me out；
不把我放在心上，那是痴心妄想；

When me they fly, I am the wings；
他们要飞翔，我就是翅膀；

I am the doubter and the doubt，
我是怀疑者，也是怀疑的思想，

And I the hymn the Brahmin sings.
婆罗门唱圣歌把我颂扬。

“I had supper in a native eating-house and then, as I didn't have to be on board till ten, I went and walked on the Maidan and looked at the sea. I thought I'd never seen so many stars in the sky.The cool was delicious after the heat of the day.I found a public garden and sat on a bench.It was very dark there and silent white figures flitted to and fro.That wonderful day, with the brilliant sunshine, the coloured, noisy crowds, the smell of the East, acrid and aromatic, enchanted me；and like an object, a splash of colour that a painter puts in to pull his composition together, those three enormous heads of Brahma, Vishnu, and Siva gave a mysterious significance to it all.My heart began to beat like mad, because I'd suddenly become aware of an intense conviction that India had something to give me that I had to have.It seemed to me that a chance was offered to me and I must take it there and then or it would never be offered me again.I made up my mind quickly.I decided not to go back to the ship.I'd left nothing there but a few things in a grip.I walked slowly back to the native quarter and looked about for a hotel.I found one after a while and took a room.I had the clothes I stood up in, some loose cash, my passport, and my letter of credit.I felt so free, I laughed out loud.
我在当地的一家餐馆吃了晚饭。由于只要十点钟之前回到轮船上即可，于是我便信步走上广场溜达，从那儿眺望大海。天上繁星点点，多得前所未见。热了一整天，此时凉爽宜人。我找到一个公园，在长凳上坐下。公园里漆黑一团，不时有白乎乎的身影默默地从我旁边走过。白天的天气晴朗，阳光灿烂，人群熙攘，身着五颜六色服装，空气中弥漫着辛辣而芳香的东方气味，令我心醉神迷。大梵天、毗湿奴和湿婆三头巨像就像是画家的画龙点睛之笔，抹上这一笔色彩，使得画面趋于完整，并带来了一种神秘的气息。我的心狂跳不已——我突然强烈地感受到，印度要赠送给我一件礼物，我必须收下。这是个千载难逢的机会，一旦失去，就永远也不会再有了。我当机立断，决定不回轮船上去了，反正我也没有什么贵重的东西在那儿，旅行包里只装了几件零碎物件。我缓步向居民区走去，想找家旅馆住下。旅馆很快就找到了，我要了个房间。我的财物只有身上的这身衣服、一点零钱、一本护照以及银行信用证。我感到一身轻，自由极了，高兴得哈哈大笑起来。

“The ship was sailing at eleven and just to be on the safe side I stayed in my room till then. I went down to the quay and watched her pull out.After that I went to the Ramakrishna Mission and routed out the Swami who'd spoken to me at Elephanta.I didn't know his name, but I explained that I wanted to see the Swami who'd just arrived from Alexandria.I told him I'd decided to stay in India and asked him what I ought to see.We had a long talk and at last he said he was going to Benares that night and asked me if I'd like to go with him.I jumped at it.We went third-class.The carriage was full of people eating and drinking and talking and the heat was terrific.I didn’t get a wink of sleep and next morning I was pretty tired, but the Swami was as fresh as a daisy.I asked him how come and he said：‘By meditation on the formless one；I found rest in the Absolute.’I didn’t know what to think, but I could see with my own eyes that he was as alert and wide awake as though he’d had a good night’s sleep in a comfortable bed.
轮船在十一点钟起航。为保险起见，我一直待在房间里，到了那个时间才走出旅馆，上码头目送它离开。然后，我去了罗摩克里希纳教会，想拜访那个在象岛跟我交谈过的长老。我不知道他的名字，费口舌解释了几句，说要见的那位长老刚从亚历山大城来到此处。和长老会面时，我说自己决定在印度留下来了，问他应该看些什么。我们长谈一番，末了，他说自己当晚要去贝拿勒斯，问我愿不愿跟他同行。我高兴得差点没跳起来。我们乘坐的是三等车厢，里面人满为患，乘客们又是吃又是喝又是说话，空气闷热。我一夜没合眼，次日早晨十分疲倦，而长老却容光焕发、精神抖擞。我问他是怎么保持精力的。他回答说：‘靠的是参究无极，于无限中修心养性。’我吃不透他的话，但眼睛却看得清他精力充沛、神清气爽，就像是在一张舒适的床上睡了一夜好觉一般。

“When at last we got to Benares a young man of my own age came to meet my companion and the Swami asked him to find me a room. His name was Mahendra and he was a teacher at the university.He was a nice, kindly, intelligent fellow and he seemed to take as great a fancy to me as I took to him.That evening he took me out in a boat on the Ganges；it was a thrill for me, very beautiful with the city crowding down to the water's edge, and awe-inspiring；but next morning he had something better to show me, he fetched me at my hotel before dawn and took me out on the river again.I saw something I could never have believed possible, I saw thousands upon thousands of people come down to take their lustral bath and pray.I saw one tall gaunt fellow, with a mass of tangled hair and a great ragged beard, with nothing but a jock-strap to cover his nakedness, stand with his long arms outstretched, his head up, and in a loud voice pray to the rising sun.I can't tell you what an impression it made on me.I spent six months in Benares and I went over and over again on the Ganges at dawn to see that strange sight.I never got over the wonder of it.Those people believed not halfheartedly, not with reservation or uneasy doubt, but with every fibre of their being.
贝拿勒斯总算到了。一个和我年纪相仿的年轻人来迎接我的同伴。长老吩咐他给我找个地方住。这个年轻人叫马亨德拉，是位大学教师，和气、善良、聪慧。我们俩一见如故，彼此产生了好感。傍晚时分，他带我乘船游览恒河，叫我大开眼界。全城的人都拥到了河岸边，场面极其壮观，让人心生神圣的敬畏感。而第二天，他带我去看的景象更叫人叹为观止。天没亮他就到旅馆找我，又带我去了恒河边，让我目睹了令人无法相信的场景——成千上万的人来到河边洗净化浴和祷告。我看见一个瘦高个男子，蓬发虬髯，光着身子，只有一条兜带遮住下体，伸出两只长胳臂，仰着脸，面对冉冉升起的太阳高声祈祷。那场面给我留下的印象简直无法形容。我在贝拿勒斯待了六个月，屡次三番于拂晓时分到恒河边去看那稀有的景象。每次去，都叫我感叹不已。那些人的宗教信仰是全心全意、毫无保留、不掺杂任何疑虑的，那种信仰渗透到他们的每一个细胞里。

“Everyone was very kind to me. When they discovered I hadn't come to shoot tigers or to buy or sell anything, but only to learn, they did everything to help me.They were pleased that I should wish to learn Hindustani, and found teachers for me.They lent me books.They were never tired of answering my questions.Do you know anything about Hinduism?”
“所有的人对我都很好。他们发现我不是来猎虎的，也不是来做生意的，而是来学习的，便不遗余力地帮助我。他们听说我想学习兴都斯坦语，感到由衷的高兴，又是为我找老师，又是帮我借书。对于我提出的问题，他们有问必答。你对印度教了解吗？”

“Very little，”I answered.
“只知道一点皮毛。”我回答。

“I should have thought it would interest you. Can there be anything more stupendous than the conception that the universe has no beginning and no end, but passes everlastingly from growth to equilibrium, from equilibrium to decline, from decline to dissolution, from dissolution to growth, and so on to all eternity?”
“我还以为你会对这门宗教感兴趣呢。印度教认为宇宙无始无终，永远在变化之中，先是到极盛，再从极盛到没落，没落至消亡，然后再复生，循环往复，以至无穷。还有什么样的信仰比这种信仰更为精彩呢？”

“And what do the Hindus think is the object of this endless recurrence?”
“印度教徒认为这种周而复始的轮回，其目的是什么？”

“I think they'd say that such is the nature of the Absolute. You see, they believe that the purpose of creation is toserve as a stage for the punishment or reward of the deeds of the soul's earlier existence.”
“他们大概认为这就是‘无限’的本质。可以看到，他们的这种生死观认为人生只是一个阶段，应该根据每个人前生前世的作为或惩罚或奖励。”

“Which presupposes belief in the transmigration of souls.”
“这种信仰主张的是生命轮回论。”

“It's a belief held by two thirds of the human race.”
“人类社会有三分之二的人都信这个。”

“The fact that a great many people believe something is no guarantee of its truth.”
“信的人多并不一定就是真理。”

“No, but at least it makes it worthy of consideration. Christianity absorbed so much of Neo-Platonism, it might very easily have absorbed that too, and in point of fact there was an early Christian sect that believed in it, but it was declared heretical.Except for that Christians would believe in it as confidently as they believe in the resurrection of Christ.”
“不错，但至少值得认真思考。基督教曾经吸收了不少新柏拉图主义的思想，也完全可以将这种学说纳入其中嘛。其实，基督教在初期阶段就有一个流派相信这种生命轮回论，却被视为异端邪说。若非如此，基督教徒们定会笃信这种观点，就像他们相信耶稣复活一样。”

“Am I right in thinking that it means that the soul passes from body to body in an endless course of experience occasioned by the merit or demerit of previous works?”
“我觉得这意味着灵魂从一个躯体转向另一个躯体，而这种转换无休无止，根据前生的功与过区分优与劣。你说是不是？”

“I think so.”
“我想是的。”

“But you see, I'm not only my spirit but my body, and who can decide how much I, my individual self, am conditioned by the accident of my body?Would Byron have been Byron but for his club foot, or Dostoyevsky Dostoyevsky without his epilepsy?”
“可是，我不仅有灵魂，也有躯体呀。谁能说得清我之所以是我，我的躯体碰巧在其中起了多大作用呢？如果没有那只畸形足，拜伦还能成为拜伦吗？如果没有癫痫症，陀思妥耶夫斯基还能成为陀思妥耶夫斯基吗？”

“The Indians wouldn't speak of an accident. They would answer that it's your actions in previous lives that have determined your soul to inhabit an imperfect body.”Larry drummed idly on the table and, lost in thought, gazed into space.Then, with a faint smile on his lips and a reflective look in his eyes, he went on.“Has it occurred to you that transmigration is at once an explanation and a justification of the evil of the world?If the evils we suffer are the result of sins committed in our past lives we can bear them with resignation and hope that if in this one we strive towards virtue our future lives will be less afflicted.But it's easy enough to bear our own evils, all we need for that is a little manliness；what's intolerable is the evil, often so unmerited in appearance, that befalls others.If you can persuade yourself that it is the inevitable result of the past you may pity, you may do what you can to alleviate, and you should, but you have no cause to be indignant.”
“印度人是不会说‘碰巧’的。他们会说是你前生的所作所为，才使你的灵魂投进一个残缺的身体。”拉里说着，用手指轻轻敲着桌子，目光飘向远方。后来，他嘴角浮出一丝笑意，眼里显出若有所思的神情，继续说道：“你可曾想到过，这种轮回论阐述了恶有恶报的道理，却也说明了恶在世间是必然的存在？如果我们受的恶报是我们前生造孽的结果，我们就会乖乖地忍受，并在今世努力行善，使来生少受些苦。自己接受恶报倒还容易，只要挺起胸膛去承受就行了，但最叫人受不了的是目睹他人遭受痛苦，而那种痛苦并非罪有应得。如果你能想得通，就会认为，那是前世造孽的必然报应，你可以同情他们，尽你的力量去减轻他们的痛苦，而且理当如此，但你却没有理由怨天尤人。”

“But why didn't God create a world free from suffering and misery at the beginning when there was neither merit nor demerit in the individual to determine his actions?”
“可是，为什么上帝不在一开始就创造一个没有痛苦和不幸的世界，一个不需要功与过决定人生的世界呢？”

“The Hindus would say that there was no beginning. The individual soul, co-existent with the universe, has existed from all eternity and owes its nature to some prior existence.”
“印度教徒不说什么开始不开始。他们认为人的灵魂与宇宙共存，和日月同生，其本质由前世决定。”

“And does the belief in the transmigration of souls have a practical effect on the lives of those who believe it?After all, that is the test.”
“那么，这种生命轮回学说对信徒的生活有实际影响吗？这才是检验真理的标准。”

“I think it has. I can tell you of one man I knew personally on whose life it certainly had a very practical effect.The first two or three years I was in India I lived mostly in native hotels, but now and then someone asked me to stay with him and once or twice I lived in grandeur as the guest of a maharajah.Through one of my friends in Benares I got an invitation to stay in one of the smaller northern states.The capital was lovely：a rose-red city half as old as time.I was recommended to the Minister of Finance.He'd had a European education and had been to Oxford.When you talked to him you got the impression of a progressive, intelligent and enlightened man；and he had the reputation of being an extremely efficient minister and a clever, astute politician.He wore European clothes and was very natty in appearance.He was rather a nice-looking fellow, a little on the stout side as Indians tend to become in middle age, with a close-cropped, neat moustache.He often asked me to go to his house.He had a large garden and we'd sit under the shade of great trees and talk.He had a wife and two grown-up children.You'd have taken him for just the ordinary, rather commonplace Anglicized Indian and I was staggered when I found out that in a year, when he reached the age of fifty, he was going to resign his profitable position, dispose of his property to his wife and children, and go out into the world as a wandering mendicant.But the most surprising part was that his friends, and the maharajah, accepted it as a settled thing and looked upon it not as an extraordinary proceeding but as a natural one.
我想是有的。我可以告诉你，我认识一个人，这种学说就对他的人生产生了实际影响。话说我到印度的头两三年，一般都住在当地的旅馆里，但有时候也有人会请我去他家住住，其中一两次去土邦主家做客，住的是豪宅。通过贝拿勒斯一个朋友的关系，我被邀请到北方的一个小邦去做客。那个邦的首府让人心情愉悦，是‘一座玫红色的城市，历史悠久’。我被引荐给了该邦的财政部长。他在欧洲求过学，是牛津大学的高才生。与之交谈，你会觉得他是个不乏智慧的进步开明人士，一个颇负盛名的精明强干的部长，一个聪颖、机敏的政治家。他身穿西装，外表整洁，长得一表人才，跟大多数中年印度人一样有点发福，嘴上留一撮胡子，修剪得又短又整齐。他经常请我去他家做客。他家有一个大花园，我们就坐在参天大树的树荫下海阔天空地聊天。他有一个妻子和两个成年的孩子。你会觉得他是个平平常常、普普通通的英国化了的印度人。谁知一年后，也就是他五十岁的时候，他竟然要辞去肥差，将家产交给妻子和孩子，去做一个托钵僧云游四方，这叫我不由得吃了一惊。而最叫人感到意外的是，他的朋友们以及那个土邦主都顺其自然，认为很正常，没有什么可大惊小怪的。

“One day I said to him：‘You, who are so liberal, who know the world, who've read so much, science, philosophy, literature-do you in your heart of hearts believe in reincarnation?'
有一天，我跟他说：‘你思想开化，见过世面，又读书破万卷——科学、哲学、文学书无不浏览，难道你真心实意相信灵魂转世一说吗？’

“His whole face changed. It became the face of a visionary.
他听后表情大变，换上了一副先知的面孔。

“‘My dear friend，'he said，‘if I didn't believe in it life would have no meaning for me.'”
“‘我亲爱的朋友，’他说道，‘假如我不相信，那么，生命对我而言就没有意义了。’”

“And do you believe in it, Larry?”I asked.
“你自己相信吗，拉里？”我插话问。

“That's a very difficult question to answer. I don't think it's possible for us Occidentals to believe in it as implicitly as these Orientals do.It's in their blood and bones.With us it can only be an opinion.I neither believe in it nor disbelieve in it.”
“这个问题很难回答。我认为，西方人不可能像东方人那样从心底里相信。这种信仰已经注入了他们的血液中。对你我而言，它只不过是仁者见仁智者见智的观点。我既相信也不相信。”

He paused for a moment and with his face resting on his hand looked down at the table. Then he leant back.
他停顿了一下，用手托住下巴，眼睛望着桌面。片刻之后，他把身子又靠了回去。

“I should like to tell you of a very strange experience I had once. I was practising meditation one night in my little room at the Ashrama as my Indian friends had taught me to do.I had lit a candle and was concentrating my attention on its flame, and after a time, through the flame, but quite clearly, I saw a long line of figures one behind the other.The foremost was an elderly lady in a lace cap with grey ringlets that hung down over her ears.She wore a tight black bodice and a black silk flounced skirt-the sort of clothes, I think, they wore in the seventies-and she was standing full face to me in a gracious, diffident attitude, her arms hanging straight down her sides with the palms towards me.The expression on her lined face was kindly, sweet, and mild.Immediately behind her, but sideways so that I saw his profile, with a great hooked nose and thick lips, was a tall gaunt Jew in a yellow gabardine with a yellow skullcap on his thick dark hair.He had the studious look of a scholar and an air of grim and at the same time passionate austerity.Behind him, but facing me and as distinct as though there were no one between us, was a young man with a cheerful ruddy countenance, whom you couldn't have taken for anything but an Englishman of the sixteenth century.He stood firmly on his feet, his legs a little apart, and he had a bold, reckless, wanton look.He was dressed all in red, grandly as though it were a court dress, with broad-toed velvet shoes on his feet and a flat velvet cap on his head.Behind those three there was an endless chain of figures, like a queue outside a movie house, but they were dim and I couldn't see what they looked like.I was only aware of their vague shapes and of the movement that passed through them like wheat waving in a summer breeze.In a little while, I don't know whether it was in a minute, or five, or ten, they faded slowly into the darkness of the night and there was nothing but the steady flame of the candle.”
“我曾经有过一次离奇古怪的经历，我想讲给你听听。当时我在静修处修行，一天晚上在自己的小屋里，正在按印度朋友教给我的方法练习冥想。我点了一支蜡烛，把注意力集中在烛光上。过了一段时间，我在烛光里很清晰地看见了许多人，一个挨一个地排成了一条长龙。为首的是一个年事已高的妇女，戴一顶花边帽，两鬓灰白的头发垂下来盖在耳朵上。她上穿黑色紧身衣，下穿黑绸荷叶边裙（我想就是上世纪七十年代流行的那种款式），面对着我，姿态娴雅、超脱，两臂沿身体下垂，手掌心向着我。她脸上布满了皱纹，表情亲切、和蔼、温柔。紧随其后的是一个瘦高个犹太人，由于侧着身子，只能看见他的侧身像——大鹰钩鼻、厚嘴唇，穿一件黄色宽松长袍，浓密的黑发上扣一顶黄色瓜皮帽。他看上去像个勤奋好学的学者，神情严肃，同时充满了激情。他身后站着个年轻人，面朝着我，眉眼看得很清晰，就好像中间没有隔任何人似的。他面色红润，乐呵呵的，一看就知道是个十六世纪的英国人。他傲然站立，两腿微微分开，一副骄横跋扈的神情。他穿一身红衣，很气派，像朝服一般，脚蹬宽头丝绒鞋，头戴丝绒扁帽。跟在这三人身后的是一条长龙，望也望不到头，就跟电影院外买票排的长队一样，但朦胧模糊，看不清面目，只觉得那些缥缈的身影在移动，像夏风吹拂下起伏的麦浪。过了一会儿，也不知是过了一分钟、五分钟还是十分钟，那些人慢慢消失在了漆黑的夜色里，我眼前只剩下那不摇不晃的烛光。”

Larry gave a little smile.
拉里说到此处，微微一笑。

“Of course it may be that I'd fallen into a doze and dreamt. It may be that my concentration on that feeble flame had induced a sort of hypnotic condition in me and that those three figures that I saw as distinctly as I see you were recollections of pictures preserved in my subconscious.But it may be that they were myself in past lives.It may be that I was not so very long ago an old lady in New England and before that a Levantine Jew and somewhere back, soon after Sebastian Cabot had sailed from Bristol, a gallant at the Court of Henry Prince of Wales.”
“当然喽，这也许是我睡糊涂了，或者做了一场梦。也可能是我盯着那微弱的烛光看，结果进入了催眠状态。而那三个人物，我看得清清楚楚，就像我现在看你一样清楚的三个人物，他们只不过是保留在我潜意识里的一些图像而已。或许可以说，他们是我的前生相。前不久，我也许是新英格兰的一位老太太，而在这以前是勒旺岛的一个犹太人；再往前追溯至塞巴斯蒂安·卡伯特从布里斯托尔启航不久的那段时间，我曾是威尔士亨利亲王宫廷里的一个侍从。”

“What eventually happened to your friend of the rose-red city?”
“你那个玫红色城市的朋友最后怎么样啦？”

“Two years later I was down south at a place called Madura. One night in the temple someone touched me on the arm.I looked round and saw a bearded man with long black hair, dressed in nothing but a loincloth, with the staff and the begging-bowl of the holy man.It was not till he spoke that I recognized him.It was my friend.I was so astounded that I didn't know what to say.He asked me what I'd been doing and I told him；he asked me where I was going and I said to Travancore；he told me to go and see Shri Ganesha.‘He will give you what you're looking for，'he said.I asked him to tell me about him, but he smiled and said I'd find out all that was necessary for me to know when I saw him.I’d got over my surprise by then and asked him what he was doing in Madura.He said he was making a pilgrimage on foot to the holy places of India.I asked him how he ate and how he slept.He told me that when anyone offered him shelter he slept on the veranda, but otherwise under a tree or in the precincts of a temple；and as for food, if people offered him a meal he ate it and if they didn’t he went without.I looked at him：‘You’ve lost weight，’I said.He laughed and answered that he felt all the better for it.Then he said good-bye to me-it was funny to hear that guy in a loincloth say，‘Well, so long, old chap’—and stepped into that part of the temple where I couldn’t follow him.
两年后我去了南方的一个叫马都拉的地方。一天晚上，在马都拉的寺院里，有人碰了碰我的胳膊，回头一看，见是一个大胡子，长长的一头黑发，光着身子，只在腰间围了一条束带，拿一根手杖和圣徒化缘用的钵子。直到他开口说话，我才认出他就是我的那位朋友。这一惊可是不小，我一时都不知说什么好了。他问我这两年做些什么，我告诉了他。他又问我去何处，我说去特拉凡哥尔。他建议我去见见希瑞·格涅沙，说道：‘他会解答你的问题的。’我让他讲讲那人的情况，他却只是笑笑，说一切见面自知。此时，初见他时的那种惊讶心情已经消失，我问他在马都拉干什么。他说自己正在朝圣途中，准备到印度的各个圣地去参拜。我问他的食宿怎么解决。他说如有人家收留，他就睡在凉台上，否则就睡在树下或寺院里。至于食物，有人施舍就吃，无人施舍便饿肚子。我打量了一下他，说他变瘦了。他大笑，说瘦下来反倒好。随后，他向我告别——听这个腰间只围一块布的人用英语说‘再见，老弟’，真是滑稽。后来，他就进了寺院的内室，那儿是不准我进的。

“I stayed in Madura for some time. I think it's the only temple in India in which the white man can walk about freely so long as he doesn't enter the holy of holies.At nightfall it was packed with people.Men, women, and children.The men, stripped to the waist, wore dhoties, and their foreheads, and often their chests and arms, were thickly smeared with the white ash of burnt cow dung.You saw them making obeisance at one shrine or another and sometimes lying full length on the ground, face downwards, in the ritual attitude of prostration.They prayed and recited litanies.They called to one another, greeted one another, quarrelled with one another, heatedly argued with one another.There was an ungodly row, and yet in some mysterious way God seemed to be near and living.
我在马都拉待了一段时间。马都拉的寺院恐怕是全印度唯一的一个允许白人四处随意走动的寺院，只是院里最为神圣的地方还是不准进的。一到晚上，这儿便人头攒动，男女老少都有。男人们赤裸上身，腰间围一块布，额头上厚厚涂一层牛粪烧剩的白灰（往往有人在胸口上和胳膊上也涂这种白灰）。只见他们拜拜这个神龛又拜拜那个，有时匍匐在地上，脸朝下，行五体投地礼。他们祈祷，诵读连祷经文；他们相互呼叫、寒暄、争吵或激烈地辩论。有人骂出的脏话简直是亵渎神明，而奇怪的是，神明似乎就在跟前，却不闻不问。

“You pass through long halls, the roof supported by sculptured columns, and at the foot of each column a religious mendicant is seated；each has in front of him a bowl for offerings or a small mat on which the faithful now and again throw a copper coin. Some are clad；some are almost naked.Some look at you vacantly as you pass；some are reading, silently or aloud, and appear unconscious of the streaming throng.I looked for my friend among them；I never saw him again.I suppose he proceeded on the journey to his goal.”
“穿过长长的过厅，过厅的房顶由一根根雕刻着图案的石柱支撑，而每根柱子跟前都坐着一个托钵僧，面前放一只化缘的钵，或者一小块席子——时不时会有施主将铜币丢在席子上。托钵僧有的穿衣服，有的几乎赤身裸体；有的目光茫然地望着从跟前走过的人；有的在默默地或出声地诵经；有的在冥想，对川流不息的人群视而不见。我举目望去，要寻找我的那位朋友，却不见其踪影，想来他又踏上了实现自身目标的旅途。”

“And what was that?”
“什么目标？”

“Liberation from the bondage of rebirth. According to the Vedantists the self, which they call the atman and we call the soul, is distinct from the body and its senses, distinct from the mind and its intelligence；it is not part of the Absolute, for the Absolute, being infinite, can have no parts, but the Absolute itself.It is uncreated；it has existed from eternity and when at last it has cast off the seven veils of ignorance will return to the infinitude from which it came.It is like a drop of water that has arisen from the sea and in a shower has fallen into a puddle, then drifts into a brook, finds its way into a stream, after that into a river, passing through mountain gorges and wide plains, winding this way and that, obstructed by rocks and fallen trees, till at last it reaches the boundless sea from which it rose.”
“即免受轮回之苦。根据吠陀经义，真我（他们称为阿特曼，咱们称为灵魂）不同于肉体和感觉，不同于思想和智慧，是‘无限’的一个组成部分；鉴于‘无限’是无边无际的，没有‘部分’之说，所以‘真我’实为‘无限’之本身。它并非创造之物，而是与天地共生之物。一旦摆脱七重蒙蔽，它便会回归它的原始之地——‘无限’。它就像海里蒸发起来的一滴水，在一场雨后坠进水潭，然后流入溪涧，进入江河，通过险峻的峡谷和广袤的平原，迂回曲折，击石穿林，最后抵达它的发源地——无垠的大海。”

“But that poor little drop of water, when it has once more become one with the sea, has surely lost its individuality.”
“可是，那个可怜的小水滴一旦融入大海，岂不就丧失了个性。”

Larry grinned.
拉里抿嘴一笑。

“You want to taste sugar, you don't want to become sugar. What is individuality but the expression of our egoism?Until the soul has shed the last trace of that it cannot become one with the Absolute.”
“你要尝糖的味道，你并不是要变成糖。何谓‘个性’，还不就是自我主义的一种表现吗？灵魂只有彻底摆脱个性，才能和‘无限’融为一体。”

“You talk very familiarly of the Absolute, Larry, and it's an imposing word. What does it actually signify to you?”
“你大谈‘无限’，好像很熟悉一样，拉里。这是一个冠冕堂皇的词。你觉得它究竟指的是什么呢？”

“Reality. You can't say what it is；you can only say what it isn't.It's inexpressible.The Indians call it Brahman.It's nowhere and everywhere.All things imply and depend upon it.It's not a person, it’s not a thing, it’s not a cause.It has no qualities.It transcends permanence and change；whole and part, finite and infinite.It is eternal because its completeness and perfection are unrelated to time.It is truth and freedom.”
“它是一种存在，不能具体地说它是什么或者不是什么。它是无法表达的。印度人称它为大梵天。哪儿都没有它的身影，却无处不在。世间万物都隐含着它的因素，都依赖它而存在。它非人非物，非因非果，超出了‘持久’和‘变化’之范围，超出了‘整体’和‘部分’之范围，也超出了‘有限’和‘无限’的范围。它是永恒的，因为它的完善与时间无关。它就是真理和自由。”

“Golly！”I said to myself, but to Larry：“But how can a purely intellectual conception be a solace to the suffering human race?Men have always wanted a personal God to whom they can turn in distress for comfort and encourage-ment.”
“我的老天！”我在心里叫了一声，但对拉里说出来的话却是：“可是，一种纯理性化的观念又怎么能抚慰受苦受难的众生呢？人们希望有一个人性化的上帝，受苦受难时可以向他寻求安慰和鼓励。”

“It may be that at some far distant day greater insight will show them that they must look for comfort and encouragement in their own souls. I myself think that the need to worship is no more than the survival of an old remembrance of cruel gods that had to be propitiated.I believe that God is within me or nowhere.If that's so, whom or what am I to worship-myself?Men are on different levels of spiritual development, and so the imagination of India has evolved the manifestations of the Absolute that are known as Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, and by a hundred other names.The Absolute is in Isvara, the creator and ruler of the world, and it is in the humble fetish before which the peasant in his sun-baked field places the offering of a flower.The multitudinous gods of India are but expedients to lead to the realization that the self is one with the supreme self.”
“也许在遥远的未来，人类会大彻大悟，发现只能在自身灵魂里寻找安慰和鼓励。我个人认为，所谓的崇拜人性化的上帝只是古代朝拜凶残暴虐神祇那种旧信仰的残留。我认为上帝只在我的心中，而不在别的地方。如果是这样，我应当崇拜谁呢？崇拜我自己？人的精神发展是分不同层次的，因此在印度人的想象中，‘无限’就有了几种表现形式——大梵天、毗湿奴、湿婆（另外还有上百种称呼）。‘无限’寓于世界的创造者和统治者‘自在天’之中，也寓于农民在太阳烤焦的土地里放一朵鲜花所供奉的卑微小神之中。印度的那些名目繁多的神只是形式，目的是让人们意识到：‘真我’乃‘我’与上天之合体。”

I looked at Larry reflectively.
我望着拉里，思绪万千。

“I wonder just what it was that attracted you to this austere faith，”I said.
“真不知是什么在吸引着你，使你沉迷于这样的信仰。”我说道。

“I think I can tell you. I've always felt that there was something pathetic in the founders of religion who made it a condition of salvation that you should believe in them.It's as though they needed your faith to have faith in themselves.They remind you of those old pagan gods who grew wan and faint if they were not sustained by the burnt offerings of the devout.Advaita doesn't ask you to take anything on trust；it asks only that you should have a passionate craving to know Reality；it states that you can experience God as surely as you can experience joy or pain.And there are men in Indiatoday-hundreds of them for all I know-who have the certitude that they have done so.I found something wonderfully satisfying in the notion that you can attain Reality by knowledge.In later ages the sages of India in recognition of human infirmity admitted that salvation may be won by the way of love and the way of works, but they never denied that the noblest way, though the hardest, is the way of knowledge, for its instrument is the most precious faculty of man, his reason.”
“这我是可以给你讲一讲的。我一直觉得宗教的创始人有点可悲，他们设置了救赎的条件——那就是你得相信他们。就好像他们缺乏自信心，非得要你的信仰给他们撑面子似的。这会叫人想起古代的那些异教神——那些神必须要信徒烧纸钱供奉，否则便会形容憔悴。不二吠檀多不需要你做任何事情，只要求你怀着炽热的感情去探知‘存在’。它断言，你一定能感受到上帝的存在，就像你能感受到欢乐或痛苦一样。如今，有许多印度人（据我所知人数达成百上千）自认为已经做到了这一点。通过认知了解‘存在’——我认为这种观点很精彩，值得称赞。在后期，印度的圣徒们认识到了人类的弱点，承认通过大爱和勤奋的工作也能得到拯救。但是，他们从不否认，最高级（也是最艰难）的途径仍是认知——认知是人类最宝贵的能力，也是人类理性的形式。”