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双语《马丁·伊登》 第二十七章

所属教程:译林版·马丁·伊登

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2022年07月09日

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CHAPTER XXVII

The sun of Martin’s good fortune rose. The day after Ruth’s visit, he received a check for three dollars from a New York scandal weekly in payment for three of his triolets. Two days later a newspaper published in Chicago accepted his “Treasure Hunters,” promising to pay ten dollars for it on publication. The price was small, but it was the first article he had written, his very first attempt to express his thought on the printed page. To cap everything, the adventure serial for boys, his second attempt, was accepted before the end of the week by a juvenile monthly calling itself Youth and Age.It was true the serial was twenty-one thousand words, and they offered to pay him sixteen dollars on publication, which was something like seventy-five cents a thousand words; but it was equally true that it was the second thing he had attempted to write and that he was himself thoroughly aware of its clumsy worthlessness.

But even his earliest efforts were not marked with the clumsiness of mediocrity. What characterized them was the clumsiness of too great strength—the clumsiness which the tyro betrays when he crushes butterflies with battering rams and hammers out vignettes with a war-club. So it was that Martin was glad to sell his early efforts for songs. He knew them for what they were, and it had not taken him long to acquire this knowledge. What he pinned his faith to was his later work. He had striven to be something more than a mere writer of magazine fiction. He had sought to equip himself with the tools of artistry. On the other hand, he had not sacrificed strength. His conscious aim had been to increase his strength by avoiding excess of strength. Nor had he departed from his love of reality. His work was realism, though he had endeavored to fuse with it the fancies and beauties of imagination. What he sought was an impassioned realism, shot through with human aspiration and faith. What he wanted was life as it was, with all its spirit-groping and soul-reaching left in.

He had discovered, in the course of his reading, two schools of fiction. One treated of man as a god, ignoring his earthly origin; the other treated of man as a clod, ignoring his heaven-sent dreams and divine possibilities. Both the god and the clod schools erred, in Martin’s estimation, and erred through too great singleness of sight and purpose. There was a compromise that approximated the truth, though it flattered not the school of god, while it challenged the brute-savageness of the school of clod. It was his story,“Adventure,” which had dragged with Ruth, that Martin believed had achieved his ideal of the true in fiction; and it was in an essay, “God and Clod,” that he had expressed his views on the whole general subject.

But “Adventure,” and all that he deemed his best work, still went begging among the editors. His early work counted for nothing in his eyes except for the money it brought, and his horror stories, two of which he had sold, he did not consider high work nor his best work. To him they were frankly imaginative and fantastic, though invested with all the glamour of the real, wherein lay their power. This investiture of the grotesque and impossible with reality, he looked upon as a trick—a skilful trick at best. Great literature could not reside in such a field. Their artistry was high, but he denied the worthwhileness of artistry when divorced from humanness. The trick had been to fling over the face of his artistry a mask of humanness, and this he had done in the half-dozen or so stories of the horror brand he had written before he emerged upon the high peaks of “Adventure,” “Joy,” “The Pot,”and “The Wine of Life.”

The three dollars he received for the triolets he used to eke out a precarious existence against the arrival of the White Mouse check.He cashed the first check with the suspicious Portuguese grocer, paying a dollar on account and dividing the remaining two dollars between the baker and the fruit store. Martin was not yet rich enough to afford meat, and he was on slim allowance when the White Mouse check arrived. He was divided on the cashing of it. He had never been in a bank in his life, much less been in one on business, and he had a naive and childlike desire to walk into one of the big banks down in Oakland and fling down his indorsed check for forty dollars. On the other hand, practical common sense ruled that he should cash it with his grocer and thereby make an impression that would later result in an increase of credit. Reluctantly Martin yielded to the claims of the grocer, paying his bill with him in full, and receiving in change a pocketful of jingling coin. Also, he paid the other tradesmen in full, redeemed his suit and his bicycle, paid one month’s rent on the typewriter, and paid Maria the overdue month for his room and a month in advance. This left him in his pocket, for emergencies, a balance of nearly three dollars.

In itself, this small sum seemed a fortune. Immediately on recovering his clothes he had gone to see Ruth, and on the way he could not refrain from jingling the little handful of silver in his pocket. He had been so long without money that, like a rescued starving man who cannot let the unconsumed food out of his sight, Martin could not keep his hand off the silver. He was not mean, nor avaricious, but the money meant more than so many dollars and cents. It stood for success, and the eagles stamped upon the coins were to him so many winged victories.

It came to him insensibly that it was a very good world. It certainly appeared more beautiful to him. For weeks it had been a very dull and sombre world; but now, with nearly all debts paid, three dollars jingling in his pocket, and in his mind the consciousness of success, the sun shone bright and warm, and even a rain-squall that soaked unprepared pedestrians seemed a merry happening to him. When he starved, his thoughts had dwelt often upon the thousands he knew were starving the world over; but now that he was feasted full, the fact of the thousands starving was no longer pregnant in his brain. He forgot about them, and, being in love, remembered the countless lovers in the world. Without deliberately thinking about it, motifs for love-lyrics began to agitate his brain. Swept away by the creative impulse, he got off the electric car, without vexation, two blocks beyond his crossing.

He found a number of persons in the Morse home. Ruth’s two girl-cousins were visiting her from San Rafael, and Mrs. Morse, under pretext of entertaining them, was pursuing her plan of surrounding Ruth with young people. The campaign had begun during Martin’s enforced absence, and was already in full swing. She was making a point of having at the house men who were doing things. Thus, in addition to the cousins Dorothy and Florence, Martin encountered two university professors, one of Latin, the other of English; a young army officer just back from the Philippines, one-time schoolmate of Ruth’s; a young fellow named Melville, private secretary to Joseph Perkins, head of the San Francisco Trust Company; and finally of the men, a live bank cashier, Charles Hapgood, a youngish man of thirty-five, graduate of Stanford University, member of the Nile Club and the Unity Club, and a conservative speaker for the Republican Party during campaigns—in short, a rising young man in every way. Among the women was one who painted portraits, another who was a professional musician, and still another who possessed the degree of Doctor of Sociology and who was locally famous for her social settlement work in the slums of San Francisco. But the women did not count for much in Mrs. Morse’s plan. At the best, they were necessary accessories. The men who did things must be drawn to the house somehow.

“Don’t get excited when you talk,” Ruth admonished Martin, before the ordeal of introduction began.

He bore himself a bit stiffly at first, oppressed by a sense of his own awkwardness, especially of his shoulders, which were up to their old trick of threatening destruction to furniture and ornaments. Also, he was rendered self-conscious by the company. He had never before been in contact with such exalted beings nor with so many of them. Melville, the bank cashier, fascinated him, and he resolved to investigate him at the first opportunity. For underneath Martin’s awe lurked his assertive ego, and he felt the urge to measure himself with these men and women and to find out what they had learned from the books and life which he had not learned.

Ruth’s eyes roved to him frequently to see how he was getting on, and she was surprised and gladdened by the ease with which he got acquainted with her cousins. He certainly did not grow excited, while being seated removed from him the worry of his shoulders. Ruth knew them for clever girls, superficially brilliant, and she could scarcely understand their praise of Martin later that night at going to bed. But he, on the other hand, a wit in his own class, a gay quizzer and laughter-maker at dances and Sunday picnics, had found the making of fun and the breaking of good-natured lances simple enough in this environment. And on this evening success stood at his back, patting him on the shoulder and telling him that he was making good, so that he could afford to laugh and make laughter and remain unabashed.

Later, Ruth’s anxiety found justification. Martin and Professor Caldwell had got together in a conspicuous corner, and though Martin no longer wove the air with his hands, to Ruth’s critical eye he permitted his own eyes to flash and glitter too frequently, talked too rapidly and warmly, grew too intense,and allowed his aroused blood to redden his cheeks too much. He lacked decorum and control, and was in decided contrast to the young professor of English with whom he talked.

But Martin was not concerned with appearances! He had been swift to note the other’s trained mind and to appreciate his command of knowledge. Furthermore, Professor Caldwell did not realize Martin’s concept of the average English professor. Martin wanted him to talk shop, and, though he seemed averse at first, succeeded in making him do it. For Martin did not see why a man should not talk shop.

“It’s absurd and unfair,” he had told Ruth weeks before, “this objection to talking shop. For what reason under the sun do men and women come together if not for the exchange of the best that is in them? And the best that is in them is what they are interested in, the thing by which they make their living, the thing they’ve specialized on and sat up days and nights over, and even dreamed about. Imagine Mr. Butler living up to social etiquette and enunciating his views on Paul Verlaine or the German drama or the novels of D’Annunzio. We’d be bored to death. I, for one, if I must listen to Mr. Butler, prefer to hear him talk about his law. It’s the best that is in him, and life is so short that I want the best of every man and woman I meet.”

“But,” Ruth had objected, “there are the topics of general interest to all.”“There, you mistake,” he had rushed on. “All persons in society, all cliques in society—or, rather, nearly all persons and cliques—ape their betters. Now, who are the best betters? The idlers, the wealthy idlers. They do not know, as a rule, the things known by the persons who are doing something in the world. To listen to conversation about such things would mean to be bored, wherefore the idlers decree that such things are shop and must not be talked about. Likewise they decree the things that are not shop and which may be talked about, and those things are the latest operas, latest novels, cards, billiards, cocktails, automobiles, horse shows, trout fishing, tuna-fishing, big-game shooting, yacht sailing, and so forth—and mark you, these are the things the idlers know. In all truth, they constitute the shop-talk of the idlers. And the funniest part of it is that many of the clever people, and all the would-be clever people, allow the idlers so to impose upon them. As for me, I want the best a man’s got in him, call it shop vulgarity or anything you please.”

And Ruth had not understood. This attack of his on the established had seemed to her just so much wilfulness of opinion.

So Martin contaminated Professor Caldwell with his own earnestness, challenging him to speak his mind. As Ruth paused beside them she heard Martin saying:—

“You surely don’t pronounce such heresies in the University of California?”

Professor Caldwell shrugged his shoulders. “The honest taxpayer and the politician, you know. Sacramento gives us our appropriations and therefore we kowtow to Sacramento, and to the Board of Regents, and to the party press, or to the press of both parties.”

“Yes, That’s clear; but how about you?” Martin urged. “You must be a fish out of the water.”

“Few like me, I imagine, in the university pond. Sometimes I am fairly sure I am out of water, and that I should belong in Paris, in Grub Street, in a hermit’s cave, or in some sadly wild Bohemian crowd, drinking claret,—dago-red they call it in San Francisco,—dining in cheap restaurants in the Latin Quarter, and expressing vociferously radical views upon all creation. Really, I am frequently almost sure that I was cut out to be a radical. But then, there are so many questions on which I am not sure. I grow timid when I am face to face with my human frailty, which ever prevents me from grasping all the factors in any problem—human, vital problems, you know.”

And as he talked on, Martin became aware that to his own lips had come the “Song of the Trade Wind”:—

“I am strongest at noon,

But under the moon

 I stiffen the bunt of the sail.”

He was almost humming the words, and it dawned upon him that the other reminded him of the trade wind, of the Northeast Trade, steady, and cool, and strong. He was equable, he was to be relied upon, and withal there was a certain bafflement about him. Martin had the feeling that he never spoke his full mind, just as he had often had the feeling that the trades never blew their strongest but always held reserves of strength that were never used. Martin’s trick of visioning was active as ever. His brain was a most accessible storehouse of remembered fact and fancy, and its contents seemed ever ordered and spread for his inspection. Whatever occurred in the instant present, Martin’s mind immediately presented associated antithesis or similitude which ordinarily expressed themselves to him in vision. It was sheerly automatic, and his visioning was an unfailing accompaniment to the living present. Just as Ruth’s face, in a momentary jealousy had called before his eyes a forgotten moonlight gale, and as Professor Caldwell made him see again the Northeast Trade herding the white billows across the purple sea, so, from moment to moment, not disconcerting but rather identifying and classifying, new memory-visions rose before him, or spread under his eyelids, or were thrown upon the screen of his consciousness. These visions came out of the actions and sensations of the past, out of things and events and books of yesterday and last week—a countless host of apparitions that, waking or sleeping, forever thronged his mind.

So it was, as he listened to Professor Caldwell’s easy flow of speech—the conversation of a clever, cultured man—that Martin kept seeing himself down all his past. He saw himself when he had been quite the hoodlum, wearing a "stiff-rim" Stetson hat and a square-cut, double-breasted coat, with a certain swagger to the shoulders and possessing the ideal of being as tough as the police permitted. He did not disguise it to himself, nor attempt to palliate it. At one time in his life he had been just a common hoodlum, the leader of a gang that worried the police and terrorized honest, working-class householders. But his ideals had changed. He glanced about him at the well-bred, well-dressed men and women, and breathed into his lungs the atmosphere of culture and refinement, and at the same moment the ghost of his early youth, in stiff-rim and square-cut, with swagger and toughness, stalked across the room. This figure, of the corner hoodlum, he saw merge into himself, sitting and talking with an actual university professor.

For, after all, he had never found his permanent abiding place. He had fitted in wherever he found himself, been a favorite always and everywhere by virtue of holding his own at work and at play and by his willingness and ability to fight for his rights and command respect. But he had never taken root. He had fitted in sufficiently to satisfy his fellows but not to satisfy himself. He had been perturbed always by a feeling of unrest, had heard always the call of something from beyond, and had wandered on through life seeking it until he found books and art and love. And here he was, in the midst of all this, the only one of all the comrades he had adventured with who could have made themselves eligible for the inside of the Morse home.

But such thoughts and visions did not prevent him from following Professor Caldwell closely. And as he followed, comprehendingly and critically, he noted the unbroken field of the other’s knowledge. As for himself, from moment to moment the conversation showed him gaps and open stretches, whole subjects with which he was unfamiliar. Nevertheless, thanks to his Spencer, he saw that he possessed the outlines of the field of knowledge. It was a matter only of time, when he would fill in the outline. Then watch out, he thought—’ware shoal, everybody! He felt like sitting at the feet of the professor, worshipful and absorbent; but, as he listened, he began to discern a weakness in the other’s judgments—a weakness so stray and elusive that he might not have caught it had it not been ever present. And when he did catch it, he leapt to equality at once.

Ruth came up to them a second time, just as Martin began to speak.

“I’ll tell you where you are wrong, or, rather, what weakens your judgments,” he said. “You lack biology. It has no place in your scheme of things. —Oh, I mean the real interpretative biology, from the ground up, from the laboratory and the test-tube and the vitalized inorganic right on up to the widest aesthetic and sociological generalizations.”

Ruth was appalled. She had sat two lecture courses under Professor Caldwell and looked up to him as the living repository of all knowledge.

“I scarcely follow you,” he said dubiously.

Martin was not so sure but what he had followed him.

“Then I’ll try to explain,” he said. “I remember reading in Egyptian history something to the effect that understanding could not be had of Egyptian art without first studying the land question.”

“Quite right,” the professor nodded.

“And it seems to me,” Martin continued, “that knowledge of the land question, in turn, of all questions, for that matter, cannot be had without previous knowledge of the stuff and the constitution of life. How can we understand laws and institutions, religions and customs, without understanding, not merely the nature of the creatures that made them, but the nature of the stuff out of which the creatures are made? Is literature less human than the architecture and sculpture of Egypt? Is there one thing in the known universe that is not subject to the law of evolution?—Oh, I know there is an elaborate evolution of the various arts laid down, but it seems to me to be too mechanical. The human himself is left out. The evolution of the tool, of the harp, of music and song and dance, are all beautifully elaborated; but how about the evolution of the human himself, the development of the basic and intrinsic parts that were in him before he made his first tool or gibbered his first chant? It is that which you do not consider, and which I call biology. It is biology in its largest aspects.

“I know I express myself incoherently, but I’ve tried to hammer out the idea. It came to me as you were talking, so I was not primed and ready to deliver it. You spoke yourself of the human frailty that prevented one from taking all the factors into consideration. And you, in turn,—or so it seems to me,—leave out the biological factor, the very stuff out of which has been spun the fabric of all the arts, the warp and the woof of all human actions and achievements.”

To Ruth’s amazement, Martin was not immediately crushed, and that the professor replied in the way he did struck her as forbearance for Martin’s youth. Professor Caldwell sat for a full minute, silent and fingering his watch chain.

“Do you know,” he said at last, “I’ve had that same criticism passed on me once before—by a very great man, a scientist and evolutionist, Joseph Le Conte. But he is dead, and I thought to remain undetected; and now you come along and expose me. Seriously, though—and this is confession—I think there is something in your contention—a great deal, in fact. I am too classical, not enough up-to-date in the interpretative branches of science, and I can only plead the disadvantages of my education and a temperamental slothfulness that prevents me from doing the work. I wonder if you’ll believe that I’ve never been inside a physics or chemistry laboratory? It is true, nevertheless. Le Conte was right, and so are you, Mr. Eden, at least to an extent—how much I do not know.”

Ruth drew Martin away with her on a pretext; when she had got him aside, whispering:—

“You shouldn’t have monopolized Professor Caldwell that way. There may be others who want to talk with him.”

“My mistake,” Martin admitted contritely. “But I’d got him stirred up, and he was so interesting that I did not think. Do you know, he is the brightest, the most intellectual, man I have ever talked with. And I’ll tell you something else. I once thought that everybody who went to universities, or who sat in the high places in society, was just as brilliant and intelligent as he.”

“He’s an exception,” she answered.

“I should say so. Whom do you want me to talk to now?—Oh, say, bring me up against that cashier-fellow.”

Martin talked for fifteen minutes with him, nor could Ruth have wished better behavior on her lover’s part. Not once did his eyes flash nor his cheeks flush, while the calmness and poise with which he talked surprised her. But in Martin’s estimation the whole tribe of bank cashiers fell a few hundred per cent, and for the rest of the evening he labored under the impression that bank cashiers and talkers of platitudes were synonymous phrases. The army officer he found good-natured and simple, a healthy, wholesome young fellow, content to occupy the place in life into which birth and luck had flung him. On learning that he had completed two years in the university, Martin was puzzled to know where he had stored it away. Nevertheless Martin liked him better than the platitudinous bank cashier.

“I really don’t object to platitudes,” he told Ruth later; “but what worries me into nervousness is the pompous, smugly complacent, superior certitude with which they are uttered and the time taken to do it. Why, I could give that man the whole history of the Reformation in the time he took to tell me that the Union-Labor Party had fused with the Democrats. Do you know, he skins his words as a professional poker-player skins the cards that are dealt out to him. Some day I’ll show you what I mean.”

“I’m sorry you don’t like him,” was her reply. “He’s a favorite of Mr. Butler's. Mr. Butler says he is safe and honest—calls him the Rock, Peter, and says that upon him any banking institution can well be built.”

“I don’t doubt it—from the little I saw of him and the less I heard from him; but I don’t think so much of banks as I did. You don’t mind my speaking my mind this way, dear?”

“No, no; it is most interesting.”

“Yes,” Martin went on heartily, “I’m no more than a barbarian getting my first impressions of civilization. Such impressions must be entertainingly novel to the civilized person.”

“What did you think of my cousins?” Ruth queried.

“I liked them better than the other women. There’s plenty of fun in them along with paucity of pretence.”

“Then you did like the other women?”

He shook his head.

“That social-settlement woman is no more than a sociological poll-parrot. I swear, if you winnowed her out between the stars, like Tomlinson, there would be found in her not one original thought. As for the portrait-painter, she was a positive bore. She'd make a good wife for the cashier. And the musician woman! I don’t care how nimble her fingers are, how perfect her technique, how wonderful her expression—the fact is, she knows nothing about music.”

“She plays beautifully,” Ruth protested.

“Yes, she’s undoubtedly gymnastic in the externals of music, but the intrinsic spirit of music is unguessed by her. I asked her what music meant to her—you know I’m always curious to know that particular thing; and she did not know what it meant to her, except that she adored it, that it was the greatest of the arts, and that it meant more than life to her.”

“You were making them talk shop,” Ruth charged him.

“I confess it. And if they were failures on shop, imagine my sufferings if they had discoursed on other subjects. Why, I used to think that up here, where all the advantages of culture were enjoyed—” He paused for a moment, and watched the youthful shade of himself, in stiff-rim and square-cut, enter the door and swagger across the room. “As I was saying, up here I thought all men and women were brilliant and radiant. But now, from what little I’ve seen of them, they strike me as a pack of ninnies, most of them, and ninety percent of the remainder as bores. Now there’s Professor Caldwell—he’s different. He’s a man, every inch of him and every atom of his gray matter.”

Ruth’s face brightened.

“Tell me about him,” she urged. “Not what is large and brilliant—I know those qualities; but whatever you feel is adverse. I am most curious to know.”

“Perhaps I’ll get myself in a pickle.” Martin debated humorously for a moment. “Suppose you tell me first. Or maybe you find in him nothing less than the best.”

“I attended two lecture courses under him, and I have known him for two years; that is why I am anxious for your first impression.”

“Bad impression, you mean? Well, here goes. He is all the fine things you think about him, I guess. At least, he is the finest specimen of intellectual man I have met; but he is a man with a secret shame.”

“Oh, no, no!” he hastened to cry. “Nothing paltry nor vulgar. What I mean is that he strikes me as a man who has gone to the bottom of things, and is so afraid of what he saw that he makes believe to himself that he never saw it. Perhaps That’s not the clearest way to express it. Here’s another way. A man who has found the path to the hidden temple but has not followed it; who has, perhaps, caught glimpses of the temple and striven afterward to convince himself that it was only a mirage of foliage. Yet another way. A man who could have done things but who placed no value on the doing, and who, all the time, in his innermost heart, is regretting that he has not done them; who has secretly laughed at the rewards for doing, and yet, still more secretly, has yearned for the rewards and for the joy of doing.”

“I don’t read him that way,” she said. “And for that matter, I don’t see just what you mean.”

“It is only a vague feeling on my part,” Martin temporized. “I have no reason for it. It is only a feeling, and most likely it is wrong. You certainly should know him better than I.”

From the evening at Ruth’s Martin brought away with him strange confusions and conflicting feelings. He was disappointed in his goal, in the persons he had climbed to be with. On the other hand, he was encouraged with his success. The climb had been easier than he expected. He was superior to the climb, and (he did not, with false modesty, hide it from himself) he was superior to the beings among whom he had climbed—with the exception, of course, of Professor Caldwell. About life and the books he knew more than they, and he wondered into what nooks and crannies they had cast aside their educations. He did not know that he was himself possessed of unusual brain vigor; nor did he know that the persons who were given to probing the depths and to thinking ultimate thoughts were not to be found in the drawing rooms of the world’s Morses; nor did he dream that such persons were as lonely eagles sailing solitary in the azure sky far above the earth and its swarming freight of gregarious life.

第二十七章

马丁幸运的太阳冉冉升起。露丝来访的第二天,他就收到了纽约一家杂谈周刊寄来的一张三块钱的支票,那是三首八行两韵诗的稿酬。两天之后,芝加哥发行的一家报纸采用了他的《宝藏探寻者》,答应刊载后付给他十块钱。稿酬是低了些,但那是他写的第一篇文章,是他打算在报刊上表述思想的第一次尝试。更令人高兴的是,这个星期还没过完,那篇写给孩子们的系列冒险故事——他的第二次尝试,便被一家自称为《青春与时代》的少年月刊所采用。不错,这篇系列故事共两万一千字,他们愿刊出后付给他十六块钱,一千字约合七角五分钱;但同样真实的是,那是他试笔时写出的第二篇作品,他自己也十分清楚,文章的笔法生硬、缺乏价值。

不过,就连他早期的作品,也没有留下平庸之作的那种粗制滥造的痕迹。他的笔调之所以生硬,完全是出于用力过猛的缘故——这是初学者的通病,就好像用攻城槌拍蝴蝶或者用大头棒绘制图案一样。所以,马丁低价卖出早期作品,心里却也高兴。他知道它们是怎样的文章,这是他完稿后不久便明白了的事情。他把希望都寄托在了以后的作品上。他力争当一名真正的作家,而不仅仅局限于为杂志撰写故事。写作时,他努力使用艺术性的表现手法。另一方面,他并未置力量于不顾,心中树立的目标是在不滥于力量的情况下增强作品的力度。同时,他也没有放弃对现实生活的热爱。虽然他竭力在作品中融入幻想出的奇观美景,但他写出的文章仍属于现实主义的范畴。他追求的是热情奔放的现实主义,贯穿着人类的愿望和信念。他想反映的是生活的本来面貌,同时又不乏精神的探索及心灵的刻画。

在看书的过程中,他发现小说作家中有两个流派。一派把人看作神,无视其凡俗的根源;另一派则把人看作一具血肉之躯,无视其天赋的梦想和神圣的愿望。在马丁看来,天神派和血肉之躯派都是错误的,错就错在他们的观点和目的都过于单调。折中的观点更接近于事实,但这会刺痛天神派,而且对血肉之躯派粗暴野蛮的理论也是一种挑战。马丁认为他的那篇叫露丝感到腻烦的短篇小说《冒险》,采用的就是既理想化又现实的写作手法;他把自己对整个问题的看法都写在了论文《天神与血肉之躯》里。

可是,《冒险》以及所有他自以为最优秀的作品仍在编辑之间转圈子,无人予以理睬。在他的眼里,他的早期作品除了能挣点稿酬,一无价值可言。他觉得,那些恐怖故事(其中的两篇已卖掉)既不是高尚的作品也不是最优秀的作品。坦白地说,它们是凭空想象出的荒诞曲,但里面也带有逼真描写的魅力,而这正是其力量所在。把真实性赋予离奇古怪、绝不可能发生的事情,他觉得是一种技巧——但充其量只是一种娴熟的技巧。这样的土壤当中是生长不出伟大文学的。它们的艺术性固然不低,可他觉得,脱离了人性的艺术性是没有价值的。所谓技巧就是在艺术性的脸上套一个人性的面具,而他在未攀上《冒险》、《欢乐》、《罐子》和《生活的美酒》创作高峰之前,就是用这种方法写了六七篇恐怖故事。

他用八行两韵诗挣来的三块钱稿酬维持朝不保夕的日子,等着《白鼠》寄支票来。他把第一张支票跟狐疑满腹的葡萄牙食品商兑换成现金,一块钱给了他还账,余下的两块钱分别给了面包铺和水果店。马丁钱囊羞涩,吃不起肉食,待《白鼠》把支票寄来时,他的日子已非常拮据。他首鼠两端,不知该怎样兑换支票。他这一辈子都没进过银行,更别说到那儿办事了。他产生了一种天真幼稚的欲望,直想走入奥克兰的一家大银行,把签过字的四十块钱支票甩给银行职员。可是,一种比较实际的思想占了上风,催促他去跟食品商兑钱,以此给对方留下深刻印象,将来好继续赊账。马丁不情愿地满足了食品商的要求,把他的账一次还清,然后接过余下的钱,装了一口袋叮当响的硬币。另外,他还清还了别的店铺的欠款,赎回衣服及自行车,付了一个月的打字机租赁费,给了玛丽亚一个月的房钱,又预交了一个月。口袋里仍剩下约三块钱,以备不时之需。

这一点钱像是一笔大款。赎回衣服后,他立刻就去看望露丝,一路上忍不住把口袋里的这一小把银币弄得叮当作响。长期以来,他一直与金钱无缘。而今,就像受到周济的饿鬼非得把吃不了的东西放在眼皮底下一样,他的手怎么也离不开那些银币。他既不吝啬也不贪婪,但这笔钱并不仅仅意味着几枚大洋和几个硬币。它们代表着成功,而币面上印的雄鹰在他看来则是一尊尊胜利女神塑像。

他下意识地觉得周围的世界真美好,而他所看到的世界似乎更美丽非凡。在长达数星期的时间里,这个世界密布愁云惨雾,一切都是那般乏味无聊;可现在,所有的债务几乎全部还清,三块钱的银币在口袋里叮当作响,心里怀着成功的感觉,于是他觉得阳光灿烂、暖意洋洋;就是天降大雨,把毫无准备的路人浇成落汤鸡,他也会觉得好玩。饿肚子的时候,他常常想到天下成千上万的饥民;现在吃饱了肚子,他就再也不去想仍有千万人在挨饿。他忘掉了饥民,但由于自己在恋爱,他却想起了天下数也数不清的情侣。未经着意思考,情诗的主题便在他心里翻江倒海。他被创作的冲动弄得出了神,电车开过了他要去的那个路口两个街区才发觉,但下车时心里一点也不窝火。

他发现摩斯家高朋满座。露丝的两个表姐妹从圣拉斐尔赶来看望她,而摩斯夫人以招待她们作幌子,却在实施自己的计划要在露丝周围聚集起一些年轻人。马丁因病不能前来时,这场战役便打响了,现在已空前激烈。她有意识请一些富于进取心的男子来家里。这样,除了多罗茜和弗洛伦丝表姐妹以外,马丁还遇到了两位大学教授(一位教拉丁语,另一位教国语)、一位刚从菲律宾归国的青年军官(此人曾是露丝的同窗)和一个名叫麦尔维尔的小伙子(此人是旧金山信托公司负责人约瑟夫·珀金斯的私人秘书);男客中还有一个精力充沛的银行高级职员,他叫查尔斯·哈普哥德,三十五岁,看上去很年轻,毕业于斯坦福大学,是尼罗俱乐部和统一俱乐部的成员,还是共和党保守派参加竞选时的发言人——总之,他是个在各方面都有发展前途的年轻人。女客中有一位肖像画家、一位职业音乐家,还有一个得过社会学博士学位,因在旧金山贫民窟干社会救济工作成了当地的名人。女客在摩斯夫人的计划中无足轻重,顶多是些不可缺少的陪衬,因为总得想办法把有作为的男子吸引到家里来呀。

“讲话时不要激动。”在令人担心的介绍开始之前,露丝告诫马丁说。

起初,他举止有些呆板,总觉得自己笨手笨脚,尤其是那副肩膀老毛病又犯,随时都可能碰坏人家的家具和摆设。和周围的人相比,他自惭形秽。他从未接触过如此高贵的客人,更不用说这么多啦。他被那位叫哈普哥德的银行高级职员所深深地吸引,决心一有机会就把他研究研究。马丁的敬畏心理之下潜藏着强烈的自我意识,他急切地想把自己跟这群男女比个山高水低,看看他们到底从书本和生活中学到了哪些自己尚未掌握的知识。

露丝的目光时不时溜过来,看他的言谈举止是否得体。她见他和她的表姐妹交谈时显得洒脱自如,不由觉得意外,也感到高兴。他的确没有露出激动的神色,因为他坐下身子,不必再为自己的肩膀担惊受怕。露丝知道自己的表姐妹是聪明的姑娘,外表看起来才华横溢,但夜里睡觉时她们夸奖马丁的一番话却叫她简直听不明白。从另一方面来说,马丁是个独具一格的才子,在舞会上和星期日野餐时妙语连珠、诙谐幽默,所以觉得在这种场合开开玩笑以及跟别人善意地争执几句,是再简单不过的事情了。何况成功之神今晚就站在他身后,拍着他的肩膀夸他成绩斐然,于是他尽可以捧腹大笑,也逗得别人发笑,一副潇洒坦然的样子。

后来经证明,露丝的担忧是有道理的。但见马丁和考德威尔教授聚在一个惹人注目的角落,马丁虽然不再指手画脚,可在挑剔的露丝看来,他眼中频频射出逼人的光芒,说话太急促、太热烈,表情太急切,热血冲上来把他的脸弄得似鸡冠子样红。他不懂礼节、缺乏自制,与那位跟他在一起谈话的年轻国语教授形成极大反差。

可是,马丁对表面的东西一点也不关心!他立刻注意到对方的大脑训练有素,而且非常欣赏对方渊博的知识。考德威尔教授却全然不知,马丁对一般的国语教授是有看法的。马丁想让他谈谈自己的行当,他起初有些不愿意,但最后还是顺从了马丁的意愿。

“要是不愿谈自己的事业,那才既荒唐又不合理呢。”几星期前他曾对露丝这样说,“男男女女聚到一起,如果不是为了交流各人心中最美好的东西,那又是为了什么呢?人们心中最美好的东西就是他们的兴趣所在、谋生之道和专业特长,他们为之日夜奋斗,甚至魂牵梦绕。试想一下,倘若勃特勒先生为了社交礼节,针对保罗·魏尔伦[1]、德国戏剧或者邓南遮[2]的小说发表一通议论,那还不让人腻味死。拿我来说,如果非得听勃特勒先生讲话,我倒情愿听他谈法律,因为那是他最得意的事业。人生如此短暂,我所遇到的人,不论男女,我都想了解他们的长处。”

“但有些话题是所有的人都感兴趣的。”露丝不同意地说。

“这话就错了。”他忙抢着说,“社会上所有的人、社会上所有的集团——或更确切地说,几乎所有的人和集团——都模仿比自己高明的人。那么,谁是最佳的模仿对象呢?是那班闲人,那班有钱的闲人。一般来说,这个世界上脚踏实地干事的人所掌握的知识,他们是不具备的。听别人谈论这类知识,那班闲人会觉得厌烦,所以他们宣布这类知识是行话,不能当众议论。他们提倡谈非专业的话题,那就是新近上演的歌剧、新近出版的小说、牌局、弹子游戏、鸡尾酒、汽车、赛马会、钓鳟鱼、钓金枪鱼、猎兽和驾游艇等——注意,这些全是那班闲人熟悉的事情。其实,这些构成了闲人们的行话。滑稽透顶的是,许多聪明人以及所有自以为聪明的人,竟听凭闲人这样哄骗自己。而我想了解的是一个人内心最出色的东西,随你称其为庸俗的行话也罢或冠以别的名称也罢。”

露丝听不懂他的话,觉得他对正统思想的攻击只不过是些偏执的看法。

此时的马丁以自己的热情感化了考德威尔教授,鼓励他说出了心中的思想。露丝在他们身旁停住脚步时,听马丁说道:

“你肯定不会在加利福尼亚大学发表这种异端邪说吧?”

考德威尔教授耸了耸肩膀。“你知道,这是老实的纳税人与政治家之间的问题。萨克拉门托[3]给我们拨款,我们就得对萨克拉门托奴颜婢膝,对大学评议委员会奴颜婢膝,对执政党的党报或两党的党报奴颜婢膝。”

“是的,这很清楚;但你自己呢?”马丁紧追不舍地问,“你一定觉得不适应吧?”

“我觉得自己和大学里别的人不一样。有时我深切地感到自己不适应,认为我应该属于巴黎、雇佣文人街、隐士的山洞,或者混迹于狂放的艺人中,饱饮红葡萄酒——旧金山人称其为‘劣等红酒’——,就餐于拉丁区[4]的廉价饭馆,大嚷大叫地对所有的问题发表一通偏激的言论。真的,我常常怀着八九分的把握肯定自己生就是个激进分子。可是,有许多问题我都吃不准。一旦直接涉及自己脆弱的人性,我就变成了胆小鬼,这就使我无法了解人类重大问题的全部要素。”

在他侃侃而谈时,马丁觉得自己直想唱《贸易风之歌》:

中午我的势头最猛,

而明月升空时,

我把船帆紧绷。

他差点没把这几句词哼出口。他醒悟到,正是对方让他想起了贸易风,想起了从容、凉爽和强劲的东北贸易风。考德威尔教授矜持稳重,可以信赖,但他身上却有种让人猜不透的东西。马丁觉得他始终未尽抒胸臆,就像他觉得贸易风从不尽全力去吹,总是保留一些力量不加使用一样。他的幻觉又开始活跃起来。他的大脑犹如极易进去的库房,贮藏着记忆中的事实和幻景,这些货物排列得井然有序等待他查阅。不管当前的这一刻发生什么样的事情,他的大脑会立即推出与之相对照或类似的史料,而这些史料通常以幻景的形式出现。这完全是无意识的行为,他的幻想和活生生的现实默契配合。他看到露丝的那副一时充满了醋意的面孔,眼前便闪现出已经淡忘的月下大风,而考德威尔教授却使他想起了在紫色的海面上激起了千层白浪的东北贸易风。记忆中的幻景一幕幕不时浮现在眼前、铺展在眼皮底下或投射在意识的屏幕上,这非但不会给他带来困惑,还会对事物起到鉴别和分类的作用。这些幻象产生于过去的活动和感觉,产生于昨天及上个星期干过的事情、经历的事件和看过的书刊——它们犹若数不清的幽灵,不管他醒着还是在睡梦中,总是萦纡他的脑际。

所以,马丁一边倾听考德威尔教授那从容不迫的谈吐——一个聪明文化人的谈吐,一边回顾自己的往事。他看到了自己当恶棍时的情景:头戴“硬边”斯坦逊[5]帽,身穿裁剪得有棱有角、双排扣的外套,晃动着肩膀,胸怀远大抱负,决心要在警察容忍的范围内为非作歹。他内心并不想掩饰这一事实,也不想加以辩解。曾经一度,他仅仅是个粗俗的恶棍,率领着一班打手,令警方大伤脑筋,叫老实巴交的工人阶级家庭谈虎色变。可后来他的抱负发生了变化。他望望四周,看到的是一群教养良好、衣着得体的男女,吸入肺里的是高雅的文化气息,同时,他还看到了自己青少年时期的幻影,头戴硬边帽、身穿有棱角的衣服,粗暴野蛮、神气活现,大摇大摆地在屋里走动。接着,他看到这个街头恶棍的幻影与现实的自己合为一体,跟一位真实贴切的大学教授坐在一起交谈。

以前,他一直未找到永久的安身之地。不管到哪里他都如鱼得水,无论是干活还是娱乐都毫不含糊,而且愿意并有能力为自己的权益和尊严奋争,颇受大伙儿的拥戴,但他毕竟是无根的浮萍。他的随遇而安叫伙伴们称心如意,而他自己却并不满意。他心里总是感到不安宁,总是听到远方传来召唤声,于是他在生活中游历和寻求,直至找到书籍、艺术和爱情。如今,他来到了这样的一个氛围之中。他和同伙共同历险,但唯他一个有资格踏入摩斯家的大门。

这种种念头、幕幕幻景并未使他分心,妨碍他聆听考德威尔教授的话语。他以挑剔的眼光分析理解,但却发现对方的知识园地完整无缺。在谈话中,他不时发现自己漏洞百出,有些话题他一点都不熟悉。不过,幸亏看过斯宾塞的著作,他知道自己已掌握了知识园地的轮廓。只要给他时间,他定能把内容填进这些轮廓。他心想:等着瞧吧,你们这些人,看我一鸣惊人!他真想拜倒在这位教授的脚下,充满敬仰之情地聆听他的教诲;可是,他听着听着,发现对方的观点中出现了薄弱环节——那薄弱环节若隐若现、难以捕捉,若非它始终存在,恐怕他还发现不了呢。一旦有了这个发现,他立刻觉得自己能和对方平起平坐。

露丝第一次踱步到他们跟前时,正赶上马丁开始发表言论。

“让我来指出你错在哪里吧,或者,让我来指出你的观点有哪些薄弱环节吧,”他说,“你缺少的是生物学知识。在你对事物的分析中,没有一处用到这种知识。——噢,我指的是能解释一切的实实在在的生物学。这种知识起自实验室、试管以及获得生命的无机物,可以推广到美学和社会学最广泛的概念。”

露丝闻罢大惊失色。她修过考德威尔教授的两门讲座课,一直视他为一切知识的活宝库。

“你的话真让我有点听不懂。”教授迟疑地说。

马丁却十分肯定对方听懂了他的意思。

“那我就解释解释。”他说,“记得在读埃及史书时,我看到这样一句话:不先研究土地问题,就理解不了埃及的艺术。”

“一点不错。”教授点头说。

“我觉得,”马丁继续说道,“如果不先了解生命的元素和构造,就无从研究土地问题及其他任何问题。倘若既不了解人的本性,又不懂构成人体的元素本质,我们怎么能理解人所创造的法律、制度、宗教和风俗呢?难道文学的人性比埃及建筑和雕塑的人性还弱吗?在已知的宇宙中,难道有哪样事物不遵守进化法则吗?——啊,我知道你对诸多艺术的阐述详尽明了,可我觉得太呆板了些。人本身被忽略掉了。工具、竖琴、音乐、歌曲以及舞蹈的演变史全被解释得头头是道;然而,人类本身的进化是怎么一回事呢?在制造出第一件工具或含糊不清地唱出第一首歌之前,人体内部的基本因素是怎样进化的呢?这种你没有考虑到的东西,就是我所说的生物学——一种极为广义的生物学。”

“我知道自己的话缺乏连贯性,但我已经尽到了努力。你刚才说话时我才考虑到这一点,所以想法不成熟,难免欠周到。你说脆弱的人性有碍于一个人面面俱到地考虑问题。此处你忽略了生物学的因素——或者在我看来如此,而正是这种因素构成了一切艺术的基础以及人类一切活动、成就的经纬。”

露丝感到惊讶的是,马丁没有即刻被驳倒,她觉得教授说话的口气有些像容忍马丁的年少无知。考德威尔教授一言不语地足足坐了有一分钟,手里摆弄着表链。

“你可知道,”他最后终于说道,“以前有个非常伟大的人也这样批评过我——他叫约瑟夫·勒·康特,是位科学家和进化论者。可他去世了,我以为再没有人会发现我的弱点了,谁知今天又被你戳穿。说实话,我承认你的论点是有道理的——其实是大有道理。我太古板,在解释性学科跟不上时代,我只能把这归咎于自己所受教育的欠缺以及懒动脑筋的性格。我从没进过物理实验室或化学实验室,不知你信不信?但这都是事实。勒·康特的批评是对的,你也是对的,至少在一定程度上——具体对到何种程度我就说不上来了。”

露丝寻了个借口将马丁拉到一旁,低声对他说:

“你不该这样缠着考德威尔教授,谈不定别人也想和他谈谈呢。”“这是我的错,”马丁悔悟地承认说,“不过,我激起了他的兴致,他谈的问题那样有趣,使我都忘乎所以了。知道吗,和我交谈过的人,数他最聪明、最有才华。另外还有一点我要告诉你:以前我总觉得凡是上过大学的人,或者社会地位高的人,个个都似他一般才华横溢、聪颖明智呢。”

“他是个与众不同的人物。”她说。

“我也这样认为。现在想让我跟谁交谈?——啊,这样吧,带我去见见那位银行高级职员。”

马丁跟那位职员谈了十五分钟的话,言谈举止无可挑剔,令露丝对自己的恋人十分满意。他的眼睛一次也没闪射逼人的光,脸颊一次也没涨红过,那坦然的话语和平稳的语调使她颇感意外。然而在马丁的眼里,银行职员阶层的身价却一落千丈,在这天晚上后来的时间里,他不断在思索一个问题:银行职员只会讲味如嚼蜡的陈词滥调。他发现那位军官既和气又单纯,是个身强力壮、精神饱满的小伙子,满足于出身和运气给自己带来的社会地位。一听说他上过两年大学,马丁觉得惊奇,不知他把学来的知识藏到了哪里。可是与那个满口陈腐话的银行高级职员相比,马丁还是更喜欢他。

“其实我对说陈腐话并没有恶感。”他后来跟露丝说,“不过,他讲话时那种夸夸其谈、扬扬得意、盛气凌人和自以为是的样子让我感到气恼,更何况他把时间拖得那么长。用他跟我讲劳工党与民主党合并之事的那些时间,我可以把‘宗教改革’[6]史从头至尾叙述一遍。要知道,他玩的是字眼游戏,就像职业牌手在发给他的牌上做文章一样。等哪天有时间我再解释给你听。”

“很遗憾,你不喜欢他,”她答道,“他可是勃特勒先生得意的人。勃特勒先生说他诚实可靠,称他为‘磐石彼得’[7],还说他无论到哪家银行机构都是栋梁之材。”

“我见到他的时间不长,听他谈话的时间更短,可我不怀疑你的话;不过,我不似以前那样关心银行的事啦。我这样直抒己见,你不会见怪吧,亲爱的?”

“不,我不见怪;你的话很有意思。”

“那好,”马丁激动地朝下说道,“我不过是个野蛮人,刚刚对文明产生一些印象。文明人一定会觉得这种印象既新奇又有趣。”

“你觉得我的表姐和表妹怎么样?”露丝问。

“跟别的女客相比,我还是喜欢她们,因为她们都很风趣,一点也不做作。”

“那你是怎么看待别的女客呢?”

他摇了摇头。

“那个从事社会救济工作的女人只不过是只精通社会学的学舌鹦鹉。我敢说,如果把她像汤姆林逊[8]一样放到星空里让风吹吹,她的脑子里找不到一丁点独特的见解。那位肖像女画家则让人觉得乏味透顶,给那个高级银行职员当夫人倒是挺合适。啧,还有那位女音乐家哩!我可不管她手指有多么灵巧,技巧有多么娴熟,表情有多么动人——事实在于,她对音乐一无所知。”

“她的钢琴弹得很好听。”露丝反驳说。

“不错,从表面上看,她确实是位音乐家,然而,对于音乐的内在精神她却理解不透。我曾问起音乐对她意味着什么——你知道我总是爱提这类问题;她竟然不清楚音乐对她意味着什么,只知道自己崇拜音乐,说音乐是一门最伟大的艺术,比生命还重要。”

“你这是逼她们谈自己的本行。”露丝谴责道。

“这我承认。如果她们连自己的本行都谈不好,再让她们对别的问题发表看法,可想而知那会多么大煞风景。过去我以为这里是社会的上层,具有得天独厚的文化氛围——”他停顿了一会儿,仿佛看到自己青少年时期的身影,头戴硬边帽,身穿有棱有角的衣服,大摇大摆在屋里走动。“我是说,我原以为这儿的男女人人聪明、个个博学。可现在根据我所了解到的一点情况,我觉得他们多半是笨蛋,剩下的也十之有九叫人感到乏味。不过,考德威尔教授是个例外。他不愧为一个男子汉,身上的每一根神经以及大脑里的每个元素都与众不同。”露丝不由喜形于色。

“跟我讲讲他的情况,”她催促道,“不要讲他伟大和杰出的一面,因为那些品质我都了解;只讲你认为不好的一面,这是我极想知道的。”“我要讲了,也许会遭到非议,”马丁幽默地说了一句,“还是你先说吧。不过,也许你认为他是个完美无瑕的人呢。”

“我修过他的两门讲座课,认识他有两年之久了,所以我很想听听你对他的第一印象。”

“你指的是坏印象?那么,我就讲给你听听。我想,你所说的那些优良品质他全具有。最起码,他是我认识的知识分子中的杰出榜样,但他的内心也隐藏着愧疚。”

“啊,不,不!”他急忙解释道,“那种愧疚可不是什么低级庸俗的事。我是说,我觉得他看透了事物的真相,而且为自己的所见所闻感到害怕,于是便假装什么也没看到。这样解释也许不够清楚,还是再换种说法吧。他寻找到了通达神秘殿堂的道路,可是却没有顺着那条道路朝前走;他也许已经看到了那座殿堂,却一个劲欺瞒自己,把那当作树叶构织的幻景。还有一种说法:他完全能够干出一番事业,却不加以重视,但内心深处又无时无刻不在为自己的消极惋惜;他暗暗嘲笑摆在面前的酬劳,但内心却对这份酬劳垂涎三尺,渴望享受成功的喜悦。”

“我看不出他有这种迹象。”她说,“其实,我不明白你的意思。”

“这只是我的一种朦胧的感觉,”马丁妥协地说,“我拿不出根据来,只是有这么一种感觉,很可能是错的。当然,你比我更了解他。”

这天晚上离开露丝家时,马丁莫名其妙地产生了一种迷惘和矛盾的心理。他对自己的目标感到失望,对自己孜孜以求想成为其中一员的人们感到失望。但另一方面,他又为自己的成就深受鼓舞。这场奋斗比他想象的容易,对他算不了什么(他不想以虚假的谦虚向自己隐瞒这个点),他比自己所跻身的那个圈子里的人都强——此处当然不包括考德威尔教授。无论是生活还是书本知识,他都比他们了解得多,真不知那些人把自己学的东西扔到了哪些旮旯犄角。他不知道自己具有非同寻常的智力,也不知道那种致力于探索深奥的秘密、寻求崇高理想的人,在摩斯之流的客厅里是根本找不到的;他意识不到,这种人像孤独的雄鹰一样,远离大地和大地上的芸芸众生,高高地独自展翅于蓝色天空。

* * *

[1] 19世纪法国象征派诗人。

[2] 19世纪末20世纪初的意大利小说家兼诗人。

[3] 加利福尼亚州府所在地,此处指州当局。

[4] 巴黎文人聚集地。

[5] 美国帽业大公司。

[6] 16世纪初,由马丁·路德发起,公开反对罗马天主教,并产生了新教。

[7] 圣经中的人物,十二使徒之一。耶稣称他为“磐石”,意思是可信赖的人。

[8] 吉卜林诗作《汤姆林逊》的主人公,死后魔鬼把他放到星空让风吹,看他有没有自己的灵魂。

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