2022年11月06日 VOA慢速英语：著名作家的亲戚在新书中提出新的社会规则

 

The famous American expert on manners, Emily Post, died in 1960. But two of Post's family members have updated her book of advice for the 21st century on the 100th anniversary of the first edition.
美国著名的礼仪专家艾米丽·波斯特 (Emily Post) 于 1960 年去世。但波斯特的两位家庭成员在第一版出版 100 周年之际更新了她的 21 世纪建议书。
 
Etiquette is a word describing the rules for acceptable behavior among members of a society. But different societies and cultures have different rules.
礼仪是描述社会成员之间可接受的行为规则的词。但是不同的社会和文化有不同的规则。
 
"I think mostly that it's really easy to paint etiquette and manners as tools for elitism, tools for secrecy, tools for exclusion," said Lizzie Post. She is Emily's great-great-granddaughter and co-writer of the latest Emily Post's Etiquette.
“我主要认为，将礼仪和礼仪描绘成精英主义的工具、保密的工具、排斥的工具真的很容易，”Lizzie Post 说。她是艾米丽的曾曾孙女，也是最新艾米丽邮报礼仪的合著者。
 
"But when we're using etiquette and manners as a tool for self-reflection and awareness of others, I think we're really going to have a chance to make the world a nicer place," she said.
“但当我们使用礼仪和礼仪作为自我反思和了解他人的工具时，我认为我们真的有机会让世界变得更美好，”她说。
 
Post published her first version of the etiquette book under a different name in 1922. The book has been changed over the years, but the 20th edition, which was released in October, is its biggest update.
波斯特于 1922 年以不同的名称出版了她的第一版礼仪书。这本书多年来一直在更改，但 10 月发布的第 20 版是其最大的更新。
 
The new book still has advice for setting dinner tables and dressing up for different events. There is also advice on how to give gifts and how to give extra money to food servers. But Post, and her cousin and co-writer, Daniel Post Senning, are interested in modern issues. They have included ideas from people who called in to their Awesome Etiquette podcast program.
这本新书仍然对设置餐桌和为不同的活动着装提出了建议。还有关于如何送礼物以及如何给食物服务员额外的钱的建议。但波斯特和她的表弟兼合著者丹尼尔波斯特森宁对现代问题很感兴趣。他们包含了来自调用他们 Awesome Etiquette 播客计划的人的想法。
 
Some of the issues have been made timely by the COVID-19 pandemic and the #MeToo movement, which reacted against sexual abuse. The book covers issues like handshakes, and seeking permission to hug or kiss on the cheek — actions that once were common.
COVID-19 大流行和针对性虐待的#MeToo 运动及时解决了一些问题。这本书涵盖了握手、寻求允许拥抱或亲吻脸颊等问题——这些行为曾经很常见。
 
There is also advice on how to handle failed marriages and separations.
还有关于如何处理失败的婚姻和分居的建议。
 
"Avoid trying to push or suggest the right decision for a friend," the Posts write in the new book. "It's especially important to be careful what you say around children whose parents are separated or divorcing."
“避免试图为朋友推动或建议正确的决定，”帖子在新书中写道。“特别重要的是要小心你对父母分居或离婚的孩子说的话。”
 
The book also deals with subjects that were not described in Emily Post's time, like mourning a miscarriage.
这本书还涉及艾米莉·波斯特时代没有描述的主题，比如哀悼流产。
 
You do not want to say things like "'Next time it'll happen,'" or "`This just wasn't your time,'" the book advises.
这本书建议你不要说“'下次它会发生'”或“'这不是你的时间'”之类的话。
 
Emily Post grew up in Baltimore, Maryland and New York City. But through her travels, Emily learned more about the lives of those outside her social status.
Emily Post 在巴尔的摩、马里兰州和纽约市长大。但通过她的旅行，艾米丽更多地了解了她社会地位之外的人的生活。
 
The younger Posts also deal with the subject of privilege. In the book they write: "Privilege can be and sound like many different things, but…it mostly comes across as a lack of awareness that you have benefited in a way others may not have."
较年轻的职位也处理特权主题。他们在书中写道：“特权可以是并且听起来像许多不同的东西，但是……它主要表现为缺乏意识，即您以其他人可能没有的方式受益。”
 
Modern-day manners on gender pronouns, like "he" and "she," are also discussed in the new book. Using the pronoun a person wants to be called is a way to show to support and respect, the book says.
新书中还讨论了现代性别代词的礼仪，如“他”和“她”。这本书说，使用一个人想要被称呼的代词是一种表示支持和尊重的方式。
 
"You might think someone's pronouns are easy enough to tell just by looking at them, but the reality is this isn't always the case," the Posts wrote.
“你可能认为某人的代词很容易通过看他们来分辨，但现实情况并非总是如此，”帖子写道。
 
In her books, Emily Post grew "more inclusive over the years," said the Lizzie, her great-great granddaughter. Emily Post's etiquette became based more on education than wealth, she said.
她的曾曾孙女莉齐说，在她的书中，艾米丽·波斯特“多年来变得更具包容性”。她说，Emily Post 的礼节更多地基于教育而不是财富。
 
For that, Lizzie Post said, "I'm happy."
为此，Lizzie Post 说：“我很高兴。”