3分钟幽默英语小故事带翻译

　　学累了?那就让我们换个不一样的方式放松一下吧!下面是听力课堂小编给大家准备的幽默英语小故事，一起来开怀大笑吧!

　　Golfing with cows

　　A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

　　一个男人摇摇晃晃地走进了急诊室，两个眼睛是青的，脖子上有明显的五指印。 　　Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.

　　医生问他发生了什么。“额，是这样的，”这个人说。“我和我老婆来了几局高尔夫，她把球打到一个牛群里。”

　　"We went to look for it and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.

　　“我们去找这个球，我四下搜索，发现一头牛的屁股后面有个白色的东西。”

　　"I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."

　　“我走过去，举起了它的尾巴想看清楚，我老婆的球就卡在牛的屁股中间。然后我犯了一个错误。”

　　"What did you do?" asks the doctor.

　　“你干嘛了?”医生问。

　　"Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"

　　“额，我举起了牛的尾巴，对我老婆喊道，'这个好像是你的!'”

　　Hen House

　　The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out the back of the parish rectory. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.

　　在一个小小的爱尔兰村庄中，牧师非常地喜爱鸡舍中的小鸡。鸡舍位于教区后面，里面有一只公鸡，十只母鸡。

　　One Saturday night the cock rooster was missing and the priest suspected that it was because cock fights were being held in the village. So he decided to do something about it at church the next morning.

　　然而，公鸡在一个星期六的晚上不见了，牧师怀疑可能是因为村里举办了斗鸡比赛。他谋划在第二天早晨去教堂做些事情。

　　At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?" All the men stood up.

　　当着大家的面，他问道：“谁有一只公鸡吗?”所有的男人都站了起来。

　　"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?" All the women stood up. 　　“不是的，”他说，“我不是那个意思，有谁见到过一只公鸡吗?”所有的女人都站了起来。 　　"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?" Half the women stood up.

　　“不是的!”他说，“我不是那个意思。有谁见过一只不属于自己的公鸡吗?”半数的女人站了起来。

　　"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen my cock?" All the altar boys stood up.

　　“不是的。”他说，“我也不是那个意思。有谁见过我的公鸡吗?”所有的侍者男孩都站了起来。

　　Stolen Turkey

　　Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and settle my guilt?"

　　布莱恩抱着一只火鸡，非常苦恼，他说：“原谅我，神父，我有罪。我偷来这只火鸡给我家人吃。你能告慰我的罪吗”

　　"Certainly not," said the Priest. "As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it."

　　“当然不行，”神父说。“你必须把它还回去，这样才能赎罪。”

　　"I tried," Brian sobbed, "but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?"

　　“我试过了。”布莱恩抽泣着，“但是他拒绝了。神父，我到底该怎么办呢?”

　　"If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family."

　　“如果你说的是真的，那你就留着它吧。”

　　Thanking the Priest, Brian hurried off.

　　谢过了神父，布莱恩跑开了。

　　When confession was over, the Priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his turkey.

　　告诫会结束后 ，神父回到住处。当他走到厨房的时候，他发现火鸡不见了。

　　学习英语也可以边学边娱乐哦!让你轻轻松松记忆~