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老爸老妈的浪漫史第四季04

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https://online2.tingclass.net/lesson/shi0529/0008/8797/s4e04.mp3
https://image.tingclass.net/statics/js/2012
[00:01.42]Barney is crazy if he thinks this is gonna work.
[00:01.42]Barney要是认为这样能行 他准是疯了
[00:04.14]I think it's gonna work.
[00:04.14]我认为这能行
[00:05.24]I hope it doesn't work.
[00:05.24]我希望不行
[00:06.33]Here he comes.
[00:06.33]他来了
[00:11.82]- You there, what's your name? - Excuse me?
[00:11.82]- 这位 你叫什么名字? - 什么?
[00:14.10]Your name, woman, what's your name?
[00:14.10]你的名字 女士 你叫什么名字?
[00:16.53]Cindy.
[00:16.53]Cindy
[00:17.64]I knew it.
[00:17.64]我就知道
[00:18.92]You're the Cindy, the one who can change everything, or spell our inevitable doom.
[00:18.92]你是那位Cindy 能改变一切 或是给我们带来不可避免的灾难的人
[00:25.22]Now listen to me, Cindy.
[00:25.22]听我说 Cindy
[00:27.24]I am Barney Stinson, and I am on an urgent mission from the future.
[00:27.24]我是Barney Stinson 我来自未来 有紧急任务在身
[00:31.97]The future?
[00:31.97]未来?
[00:32.91]The future, and I can prove it to you.
[00:32.91]未来 我能证明
[00:35.10]In exactly four seconds, the woman at that booth is going to slap that man.
[00:35.10]4秒后 那桌的女士会给那男的一巴掌
[00:42.20]What the hell?
[00:42.20]你干啥?
[00:45.00]In a few minutes, the young me from your time is going to come through that door.
[00:45.00]在几分钟后 年轻的我 将会从那扇门进来到你们的时空
[00:51.27]Now, Cindy, I know this sounds insane, but in order to save the planet,
[00:51.27]Cindy 我知道这听起来很疯狂 但为了拯救地球
[00:57.23]you need to sleep with him tonight.
[00:57.23]你今晚要和他上床
[01:00.50]What? I...
[01:00.50]什么? 我...
[01:01.11]Sleep with Barney Stinson tonight, in whatever way he wants it,
[01:01.11]今晚和Barney Stinson上床 以他希望的任何方式
[01:06.36]or he won't be able to find the solution to global warming that saves the human race.
[01:06.36]不然他就无法解决全球变暖问题 也就拯救不了人类
[01:11.92]What are you talking about?
[01:11.92]你说啥呢?
[01:12.96]I have no time to explain.
[01:12.96]我没时间解释了
[01:14.99]I have to get back to the reality accelerator before the vortex closes.
[01:14.99]我得在时空漩涡关闭之前回到时间机器里
[01:19.87]Only you can save us, Cindy.
[01:19.87]只有你能拯救我们 Cindy
[01:23.01]I must away!
[01:23.01]我走了!
[01:25.50]Okay, guys, the movers are coming in 14 hours.
[01:25.50]好吧 伙计们 还有14小时搬家工就来了
[01:28.67]We gotta get back upstairs and finish packing.
[01:28.67]我们得回楼上打包好
[01:30.70]You guys still aren't finished packing?
[01:30.70]你们还没打包完呢?
[01:32.39]How is this taking so long?
[01:32.39]怎么能用这么长时间?
[01:34.14]Hey, all the great memories of our 20s took place in that apartment.
[01:34.14]嘿 所有我们20多岁的美好回忆 都发生在那公寓里
[01:37.64]It's not like throwing stuff in a box.
[01:37.64]可不是把东西扔进箱子那样
[01:39.39]You start to reminisce.
[01:39.39]你会缅怀的
[01:40.72]Not me. The key?
[01:40.72]我不是 关键就是?
[01:42.02]Throw stuff out and never look back.
[01:42.02]扔出东西 永不回头
[01:43.57]I'm moving to Japan. It took me a half hour to pack.
[01:43.57]我要去日本了 我才花半小时去收拾
[01:45.88]A half hour?
[01:45.88]半小时?
[01:46.82]Well, it would have taken me 20 minutes, but a friend called me in tears.
[01:46.82]要不是一个朋友哭哭啼啼的打电话给我 20分钟就搞定了
[01:50.14]Moving is really emotional, okay?
[01:50.14]搬家真伤感
[01:52.63]It is. I mean, everything is changing.
[01:52.63]当然 我是说 一切在变
[01:55.34]I'm gonna be living in New Jersey with Stella, you guys will be in your new place.
[01:55.34]我将要和Stella住在新泽西 你们会住在你们的新家
[01:58.38]You're starting a new job in Tokyo.
[01:58.38]你要在东京开始新的工作
[02:00.97]It's the end of an era.
[02:00.97]一个时代的结束
[02:03.08]I think we should have a toast, but not our usual crap.
[02:03.08]我想我们要干一杯 但不是平常那样
[02:05.76]Hey, uh, Wendy, your most expensive bottle of scotch.
[02:05.76]嘿 Wendy 来瓶这里最贵的威士忌
[02:09.18]That's 50-year-old Glen McKenna, and it's $2,500.
[02:09.18]50年陈酿的Glen McKenna 2500美元
[02:13.19]Excellent.
[02:13.19]很好
[02:13.89]A bottle of that with beer chasers, and what do you think, cancel the scotch?
[02:13.89]一瓶那个 再来点啤酒小吃 你们说呢 不要威士忌了?
[02:17.30]Yeah.
[02:17.30]嗯...
[02:21.19]Vodka rocks.
[02:21.19]加冰的伏特加
[02:22.73]It's not gonna work.
[02:22.73]肯定没戏
[02:23.78]Oh, my God, you're... Oh, my God!
[02:23.78]哦 天啊 你是...哦 天啊!
[02:28.04]Can I buy you a drink?
[02:28.04]能请你喝杯酒吗?
[02:32.23]I suppose I have time for one drink and 45 minutes to an hour of some other activity,
[02:32.23]我想1小时里我能先喝点酒 剩下的45分钟还能干点别的
[02:37.80]but after that, I have to get back to a top-secret research project I'm working on.
[02:37.80]但那之后 我要接着去进行绝密的研究
[02:42.69]Global warming?
[02:42.69]全球变暖?
[02:44.41]My God, how did you know that?
[02:44.41]妈呀 你咋知道的?
[03:00.34]How I Met Your Mother Season04 Episode04
[03:00.34]老爸老妈浪漫史 第四季 第4集
[03:02.34]Hey, look at this.
[03:02.34]嘿 看这个
[03:03.62]A photo from the first day we moved into this place.
[03:03.62]我们第一天搬进来时的照片
[03:08.18]So many great memories.
[03:08.18]这么多美好的回忆
[03:09.70]See? That is exactly the type of crap you should be trashing.
[03:09.70]看到没? 那才是你要扔掉的垃圾
[03:13.86]So you don't keep any photos?
[03:13.86]你都不保留照片的吗?
[03:15.98]No, they're like love letters or yearbooks or someone's ashes.
[03:15.98]不 那就像情书 年鉴或是骨灰
[03:19.43]They just take up space.
[03:19.43]留着占地方
[03:21.26]Besides, Stella's not gonna let you keep half of this junk.
[03:21.26]再说了 Stella绝不会让你 留半点这些垃圾的
[03:23.81]Why wouldn't she?
[03:23.81]他为什么不让?
[03:26.42]Oh, Ted, oh, sweetie.
[03:26.42]哦 Ted 哦 小可爱
[03:28.42]Okay, here's the thing that guys only learn after they move in with a woman.
[03:28.42]男人要知道 当你和女人一起住的时候
[03:32.65]All of your stuff is stupid.
[03:32.65]你所有的东西都很白痴
[03:34.95]Like what?
[03:34.95]像是什么?
[03:35.75]Um, like anything you bought at a Renaissance Faire.
[03:35.75]像是你在文艺复兴节集会上买的东西
[03:39.42]Hey, hey, there's not enough mead in the world to make me get rid of my flail.
[03:39.42]喝完世界上所有的蜂蜜酒 我都不会把我的流星锤扔掉
[03:44.36]Oh, hey, uh, Ted, since we're clearly not getting our security deposit back,
[03:44.36]既然我们拿不回押金了
[03:47.72]I thought maybe you could reimburse me for my half.
[03:47.72]我想你得把我的那一半钱赔我
[03:49.98]Wait a second-- why should I have to pay more than you?
[03:49.98]等会 为啥我要比你赔偿的多?
[03:52.60]Because you treated this apartment the way John Bonham treated his central nervous system.
[03:52.60]你对待这公寓就像John Bonham (著名摇滚鼓手 酗酒致死) 对待他的中枢神经系统一样
[03:56.91]That's not true.
[03:56.91]扯淡
[03:58.40]Exhibit A.
[03:58.40]实例 A
[04:04.16]What's that?
[04:04.16]这是什么?
[04:04.88]A 1986 World Book encyclopaedia.
[04:04.88]1986年的世界百科全书
[04:08.18]It's exactly the one I grew up with.
[04:08.18]就是它伴着我长大
[04:10.02]Encyclopaedia?
[04:10.02]Encyclopaedia?(百科全书)
[04:11.74]Oh, you think it should be pronounced encyclo-pee-dia.
[04:11.74]你认为该读作encyclo-pee-dia
[04:15.32]It's a common mistake.
[04:15.32]这是个常见的错误
[04:16.66]But if you look at that squished together "ae" symbol in this here encyclopaedia,
[04:16.66]但你要是在百科全书里找ae连音
[04:20.77]you'll learn that it's a ligature derived from the Anglo-Saxon rune ash...
[04:20.77]你会知道这个连音是起源于 英国撒克逊人...
[04:31.49]You know, you're gonna have to paedia for that.
[04:31.49]知道么 你得"配"钱了
[04:35.33]But you never did.
[04:35.33]你从没赔过钱
[04:36.86]And then there's Exhibit B.
[04:36.86]接着是实例 B
[04:43.23]Good morrow, fair gentles.
[04:43.23]早上好 大家
[04:45.08]Look what I won at the Renaissance Faire.
[04:45.08]看我在文艺复兴节集会买到什么了
[04:52.17]And you're also responsible for any damage Robin did when she was your girlfriend.
[04:52.17]你同样也要负责在Robin是你女朋友时 因她而起的损坏
[04:55.67]What damage did I cause?
[04:55.67]什么损坏是因我而起的?
[04:58.37]Do you remember that night when you drank the 12'er of Molson and you got all super Canadian?
[04:58.37]还记不记得那天晚上你喝了 不知道多少Molson啤酒 一副加拿大英雄模样?
[05:05.46]Stanley Cup, game six, eh?
[05:05.46]史丹利杯 第六场
[05:08.10]The Rangers are about to be sorry they ever played shinny with the Canucks.
[05:08.10]纽约游骑兵队会后悔和法裔加拿大人打冰球的
[05:12.28]- Hey, hey, Robin. - Yeah?
[05:12.28]- 嘿 嘿 Robin - 恩?
[05:14.07]I'll give you 20 bucks if you can shoot it through this front door.
[05:14.07]你要是能把球打过这个门我给你20块钱
[05:16.21]Oh, you're nuttier than a Tim Horton's maple log.
[05:16.21]你比Tim Horton的粉丝还狂热
[05:20.68]Timmy Ho!
[05:20.68]Timmy Ho!
[05:23.62]That's it, Robin. Give me the stick.
[05:23.62]够了 Robin 把球棍给我
[05:26.97]I'll give you summer teeth.
[05:26.97]小心我打的你满地找牙
[05:28.59]Some are here, some are there.
[05:28.59]这一堆 那一堆
[05:31.51]Robin, give me the stick,
[05:31.51]Robin 给我球棍
[05:33.51]Take off, hoser.
[05:33.51]滚开 傻瓜
[05:36.16]That's it!
[05:36.16]够了!
[05:37.69]- Get her, boys, get her! - Scrap? I'll scrap!
[05:37.69]- 拉住她 快拉住她! - 让我扔掉? 我打死你还差不多!
[05:39.82]- Guys, come on! - For America.
[05:39.82]- 伙计们 得了吧! - 为了美国而战
[05:43.47]All right, break it, break it up!
[05:43.47]好了 都靠边 靠边站!
[05:45.43]Ted, no!
[05:45.43]Ted 不!
[05:47.68]You never break up a girl fight! Never!
[05:47.68]你绝不该阻止姑娘打架! 绝不该!
[05:54.66]Entirely Barney's fault.
[05:54.66]那绝对是Barney的错
[05:56.43]As, by the way, is the big scorch mark over the fireplace.
[05:56.43]顺便说一下 壁炉上面有一大块烧焦痕迹
[06:02.06]Kids, to understand the story of the scorch mark,
[06:02.06]孩子们 为了能理解烧焦的故事
[06:04.89]I first need to tell you the story of the intervention for our friend Stewart.
[06:04.89]我要先给你们讲Stewart的批斗会的故事
[06:08.46]What's going on?
[06:08.46]怎么了?
[06:09.67]Stewart, this is an intervention.
[06:09.67]Stewart 这是一次批斗会
[06:14.28]The alcohol changes you, Stewart.
[06:14.28]酒精改变了你 Stewart
[06:16.87]It makes you a different person.
[06:16.87]它让你变成了另一个人
[06:19.16]And I'm in love with the man that I married.
[06:19.16]而我爱的是我当初嫁给的那位
[06:23.05]Thank you.
[06:23.05]谢谢你
[06:25.01]This is just the push I need.
[06:25.01]这真的是我所需要的压力
[06:28.49]I love you guys.
[06:28.49]我爱你们
[06:33.11]There's the birthday boy.
[06:33.11]寿星老在这儿呢
[06:34.96]Time to let the party monster out of its cage, Stewie!
[06:34.96]到奔放的时候了 Stewie!
[06:38.74]No!
[06:38.74]不!
[06:40.21]Come on, buddy.
[06:40.21]来吧 哥们
[06:41.71]People don't want to see Bruce Banner, dude.
[06:41.71]大家可不想见Bruce Banner 伙计
[06:44.11]They want to see the Hulk.
[06:44.11]他们想看到Hulk (绿巨人变身前是Bruce Banner 变身后是Hulk)
[06:45.70]Hulk, Hulk, Hulk... What?
[06:45.70]Hulk Hulk Hulk...怎么回事?
[06:55.65]That's what I get for skimming the E-vite.
[06:55.65]这是我提纯维生素E用的东西
[06:59.61]TED: Later that day, we celebrated our first successful intervention.
[06:59.61]那天晚上 我们庆祝第一次成功的批斗会
[07:03.29]I am really proud of us for helping Stewart.
[07:03.29]我真为我们能帮助Stewart感到高兴
[07:05.76]Yeah, what an amazing honest, human moment.
[07:05.76]对啊 多么诚实 展现人性的时刻
[07:09.17]I agree. Yay us.
[07:09.17]我赞同 耶!
[07:11.47]Marshall, are you really gonna keep wearing that hat?
[07:11.47]Marshall 你真的还要戴那顶帽子?
[07:14.56]Yeah, it's been two weeks, Marshall.
[07:14.56]对啊 都两周了 Marshall
[07:16.55]Two awesome weeks...
[07:16.55]很棒的两周...
[07:18.83]and heck, yeah, I'm gonna keep wearing it.
[07:18.83]绝对的 我要一直带着
[07:30.55]Marshall, this is an intervention.
[07:30.55]Marshall 这是一次批斗会
[07:34.53]It's about the hat.
[07:34.53]关于那帽子的
[07:36.51]Huh? No...
[07:36.51]啊? 不...
[07:39.11]I have it under control, okay?
[07:39.11]一切尽在我掌握中 不是吗?
[07:41.47]I can take it off whenever I want to.
[07:41.47]我收放自如的
[07:44.91]Dear Marshall, I do not like that stupid hat.
[07:44.91]亲爱的Marshall 我不喜欢那顶白痴帽子
[07:49.76]I want to beat it with a bat.
[07:49.76]我想用球棍揍它
[07:52.60]Or maybe stab it with a fork.
[07:52.60]或是用叉子刺它
[07:55.08]It makes you look like such a dork.
[07:55.08]你带着它像是怪叔叔
[07:58.47]TED: After that, interventions became a pretty regular thing around our apartment.
[07:58.47]在那之后 批斗会成了我们公寓定期活动
[08:06.29]Cor blimey.
[08:06.29]真该死
[08:08.16]This is a nice bloody surprise. What's this about then?
[08:08.16]真他妈是个惊喜 这是关于什么的?
[08:11.40]Lily... it's about the weird fake English accent.
[08:11.40]Lily... 这是关于你那怪异的假英腔
[08:16.53]Oh, bollocks.
[08:16.53]放屁
[08:24.21]Spray tan?
[08:24.21]要说我喷的日晒色?
[08:28.76]They reel you in with a coupon, and then you just get hooked.
[08:28.76]他们用优惠券勾引你 然后你就上钩了
[08:31.32]Oh, we know, sweetie, we know.
[08:31.32]哦 我们知道 亲爱的 我们知道
[08:33.81]No, no, no, no-- this is a new sweater.
[08:33.81]不 不 不 不 这可是新毛衣
[08:38.98]What?
[08:38.98]怎么了?
[08:40.66]The magic tricks.
[08:40.66]魔术把戏
[08:41.85]Specifically, those involving fire.
[08:41.85]特别是 有火的
[08:44.38]Magic tricks?
[08:44.38]魔术把戏?
[08:46.05]Guys, interventions are supposed to help people,
[08:46.05]伙计们 批斗会该是帮助他人
[08:49.10]not attack every little thing you don't like about them.
[08:49.10]不是去攻击你们不喜欢的一些小事
[08:52.88]I'm sorry, but that really steams me.
[08:52.88]抱歉 真的让我生气
[08:55.69]That really burns me up!
[08:55.69]让我火大!
[08:58.10]I mean, I am filled with a white-hot rage!
[08:58.10]我满腔炙热的怒火!
[09:08.65]Thank you.
[09:08.65]谢谢
[09:12.27]- Oh, shoot. - I smell hair! I smell hair!
[09:12.27]- 靠 - 烧头发的味! 烧头发的味!
[09:14.20]And that's the story of the scorch mark.
[09:14.20]到此烧焦痕迹的故事就讲完了
[09:17.04]Wait, that's weird.
[09:17.04]等等 很奇怪
[09:18.30]When I was going through the closet, I thought I saw the intervention banner.
[09:18.30]我去壁橱的时候 我看到了批斗会的横幅
[09:22.57]S-So?
[09:22.57]那?
[09:23.85]So, the banner burned up. Why is there a new one?
[09:23.85]横幅都烧毁了 为什么还有一个新的?
[09:27.30]And there are sealed letters here from all of you that say "Ted."
[09:27.30]里面有你们的信封 都写着"TED"
[09:31.68]Were you guys planning an intervention for me?
[09:31.68]你们给我也准备了一场批斗会?
[09:33.96]Oh, that-- that was stupid.
[09:33.96]哦 那个 那个很白痴
[09:36.09]Yeah, just, just forget about that.
[09:36.09]对 忘了吧
[09:37.64]Wh-What was it for? The Crocs?
[09:37.64]因为什么? 鳄鱼?
[09:40.68]- The hair product? - Not Stella.
[09:40.68]- 洗发水? - 不是关于Stella 反正...
[09:44.26]Oh, my God, this was about Stella.
[09:44.26]哦 天啊 是关于Stella的
[09:46.59]I just said "Not Stella."
[09:46.59]我刚说玩 "不是关于Stella"
[09:49.48]So maybe it was about your poor listening skills, Ted.
[09:49.48]好像是关于你耳背的问题 Ted
[09:52.41]- What? - It's out of control. See?
[09:52.41]- 什么? - 已经晚期了 看到没?
[09:55.81]You guys don't think I should marry Stella.
[09:55.81]你们认为我不该娶Stella
[10:02.75]You guys don't think I should marry Stella.
[10:02.75]你们认为我不该娶Stella
[10:04.70]Ted, we do. We're all really happy for you.
[10:04.70]Ted 我们赞成你 我们真的为你高兴
[10:07.51]Yeah. Like I said, it was stupid.
[10:07.51]对 就像我说的 很白痴
[10:09.51]Well, obviously, it wasn't,
[10:09.51]很显然 不是那样
[10:11.16]because we agreed not to have any more stupid interventions at our intervention intervention.
[10:11.16]因为我门已经在批斗"批斗会"上达成共识 不再来愚蠢的批斗会了
[10:16.74]We're having too many interventions.
[10:16.74]批斗会开得太多了
[10:19.98]So, what was your big, serious oblem with me and Stella?
[10:19.98]那么 你们对我和Stella有什么意见?
[10:24.21]Yes! Yes! In everyone's face!
[10:24.21]耶! 耶! 都看见了吧!
[10:27.71]You all said the "future Barney" thing wouldn't work.
[10:27.71]你们都说"未来的Barney"那套不管用
[10:29.89]You told me I was crazy.
[10:29.89]你们说我疯了
[10:31.71]My shrink told me I was crazy.
[10:31.71]我的心理医生说我疯了
[10:34.44]Well, who's the narcissist with severe attachment disorder now, Dr. Grossbard?
[10:34.44]那现在谁又是有严重依附紊乱症的 自恋狂呢 Grossbard医生?
[10:41.30]Intervention banner? What's that for?
[10:41.30]批斗会横幅? 拿它干什么?
[10:43.03]Stella.
[10:43.03]Stella
[10:47.46]Ted, I cannot stand idly by...
[10:47.46]Ted 我不能这样无动于衷了...
[10:49.35]You've just been carrying that around?
[10:49.35]你一直把信带在身上?
[10:51.22]Please, Ted?
[10:51.22]听我说完好吗 Ted?
[10:53.21]"I cannot stand idly by while you make the biggest mistake any man can make-- getting married."
[10:53.21]"我不能眼睁睁看着你 犯任何一个男人都会犯的错误——结婚"
[10:59.45]"Mark my words,this whole thing is gonna go up in flames!"
[10:59.45]"记住我的话 这一切马上就灰飞烟灭了!"
[11:06.35]Oh, damn! I put the flame cue too early.
[11:06.35]哦 该死! 火着的太早了
[11:09.57]I had so many more important things to say, and...
[11:09.57]我还有很多更重要的事要说...
[11:11.62]The point is, Ted, marriage is stupid.
[11:11.62]Ted 重点是 结婚是个很愚蠢的举动
[11:17.67]Every year, there are a million new hot 22-year-olds walking into bars,
[11:17.67]每年都有成千上万的 20多岁的辣妹来酒吧
[11:23.56]and call me "glass half full," but I think they're getting dumber.
[11:23.56]并亲热地说 请我喝杯酒吧 可我总觉得他们越来越没劲了
[11:27.74]Oh, come on, Barney, even you aren't still gonna be hitting on 22-year-olds when you're 80.
[11:27.74]得了吧 Barney 即使是你 到80岁 也未必能钓上20多岁的美女了
[11:33.30]I accept that challenge.
[11:33.30]我接受挑战
[11:35.12]What challenge?
[11:35.12]啥挑战?
[11:36.29]To prove to you that I will be exactly this awesome when I'm 80,
[11:36.29]证明我到80岁了还会像现在这样性感
[11:41.44]I will hook up with a 22-year-old while in my old-man makeup.
[11:41.44]我要装扮成老人 勾引到一个22岁的辣妹
[11:46.90]I didn't remotely challenge you to that.
[11:46.90]我一点也没那个意思
[11:49.68]I mean, I definitely want to see it.
[11:49.68]其实我很想知道会发生啥
[11:51.18]But I didn't remotely challenge you to that.
[11:51.18]但我还是一点也没那个意思
[11:54.34]I want to hear the other letters.
[11:54.34]我想看看你们的信
[11:56.05]Ted, this is ridiculous.
[11:56.05]Ted 太荒谬了
[11:57.54]W-We changed our minds.
[11:57.54]我...我们改变想法了
[11:59.03]And suppose you change them back?
[11:59.03]如果你又改回来了呢?
[12:01.14]Lily, come on, let's hear yours.
[12:01.14]Lily 你先读吧
[12:07.47]Gilbert's reading skills have improved drastically since...
[12:07.47]自从...Gilbert的阅读水平与日俱增
[12:11.10]Wait, this is a letter I meant to send home with one of my kindergarteners.
[12:11.10]等等 这封信本应该寄到 幼儿园一个小朋友家的
[12:16.95]Gilbert, are things moving too fast between you and a girl named Stella?
[12:16.95]Gilbert 你和一个叫Stella的女孩 进展是不是太快了?
[12:22.06]I wish.
[12:22.06]但愿吧
[12:27.03]Robin, could I hear yours?
[12:27.03]Robin 你的呢?
[12:34.74]"Dear Ted, it's 'encyclo-pee-dia,'not 'encyclo-pay-dia.'
[12:34.74]"亲爱的Ted 不要把<百科全书> 说成<百科钱书>
[12:38.73]Why do you always say things" "in the most pretentious way possible?
[12:38.73]你为啥总是以一种 自命不凡的口气的说话"
[12:41.93]It makes you sound douchey--" and that's 'douchey,' not 'douch-ay.'"
[12:41.93]听上去很无知 是"无知" 不是"无机"
[12:46.67]Yeah, you already read that one at my pronunciation intervention.
[12:46.67]这是你在我的语音批斗会上读的信
[12:50.20]Where's the letter about Stella?
[12:50.20]关于Stella的信呢?
[12:51.71]I didn't write one-- I-I'm your ex-girlfriend;
[12:51.71]我可没写 我 我是你的前女友呢
[12:53.89]I figured anything I said on the subject would sound catty.
[12:53.89]如果我在这问题上发表意见 都很没有说服力
[12:57.09]Plus, I'm hotter than her, so who cares?
[12:57.09]还有 我比她辣多了 谁在乎啊?
[13:01.88]Marshall?
[13:01.88]Marshall?
[13:03.16]- Dude, it's water under the bridge... - Please.
[13:03.16]- 伙计 都已经过去的事情了 就不能... - 快读吧
[13:13.11]"Dear Ted, Stella seems like a wonderful person.
[13:13.11]"亲爱的Ted Stella的确是个很好的人
[13:19.19]But you don't know her well enough to get married.
[13:19.19]但结婚是不是太快了点"
[13:22.56]"You certainlydon't know her well enough to commit to raising a seven-year-old with her."
[13:22.56]"你还没有了解她到和她 一起抚养一个7岁孩子的地步"
[13:28.36]You're not ""doing her, her child" "or yourself any favors by rushing into this.
[13:28.36]这样鲁莽对你 对她 对她的孩子都没有任何好处
[13:35.00]Just give it some more time."
[13:35.00]再等等吧
[13:38.58]Dude, that was months ago, all right?
[13:38.58]伙计 这都是几个月前写的好吧?
[13:40.97]That was before we got to know Stella and see how awesome she is and what a great couple you guys are.
[13:40.97]我们现在已经了解她了 她很棒 而且你们很般配
[13:46.49]That's why we decided not to even have that intervention.
[13:46.49]所以我们决定不批斗你了
[13:49.52]Thank you.
[13:49.52]谢谢
[13:50.47]Because I-I really need you guys to be on board with this.
[13:50.47]我太需要你们支持我了
[13:52.66]And we are.
[13:52.66]我们支持你
[13:53.55]And we hope you're not mad at us.
[13:53.55]希望你别生气
[13:55.31]Course not.
[13:55.31]当然不会
[13:57.00]I mean, it's not like what you said was crazy.
[13:57.00]你们又没说胡话
[13:59.94]Y-You had a lot of valid concerns.
[13:59.94]你...你们的顾虑都是有据可依
[14:01.81]Yeah, but concerns we have completely moved on from.
[14:01.81]是啊 但这些顾虑都消除了
[14:05.37]But you had a point.
[14:05.37]但你们说的对
[14:06.68]I mean, this whole thing has moved pretty fast.
[14:06.68]确实太快了点
[14:09.60]Well, you know what? Maybe that's because, uh, when it's right, yojust know.
[14:09.60]也许是因为 时机已经成熟了
[14:13.52]Yeah, I guess, but-but we are still, you know, getting to know each other.
[14:13.52]是啊 但...但我们仍然 需要彼此了解对方
[14:18.22]And, Lily, maybe you're right.
[14:18.22]Lily 也许你说对了
[14:19.67]Maybe Stella won't like any of my stuff.
[14:19.67]也许Stella会讨厌我的东西
[14:23.18]Like the robot cookie jar.
[14:23.18]比如这个机器人饼干罐
[14:26.24]This was, like, the first thing we bought for this place, remember?
[14:26.24]好像是我们为这里 买的第一个东西 还记得吗?
[14:28.57]Of course I do.
[14:28.57]当然记得
[14:30.55]Marshall, my sensors indicate that your pecan sandy levels are dangerously low.
[14:30.55]Marshall 我探测到 胡桃饼干已经少的可怜了
[14:38.55]My collection of James Bond movies. Remember?
[14:38.55]007系列珍藏版 记得不?
[14:41.42]We watched them all in order, and then Lily spoke in that weird English accent for, like, the next month?
[14:41.42]我们一起按顺序看了 然后接下来的一个月 Lily一嘴的英式怪腔调
[14:46.62]- It was sophisticated. - No.
[14:46.62]- 那很时髦 - 才怪
[14:50.24]My signed Bernie Kosar cleats.
[14:50.24]签了名的Bernie Kosar防滑鞋
[14:53.22]My elephant lamp.
[14:53.22]大象灯
[14:55.07]The English phone booth.
[14:55.07]英式电话亭
[14:57.04]My sombrero!
[14:57.04]墨西哥阔边帽!
[15:01.15]Ted, what are you doing?
[15:01.15]Ted 你在干啥?
[15:02.18]Unpacking.
[15:02.18]拆包
[15:03.76]I am never leaving this apartment!
[15:03.76]我决不离开这里!
[15:13.07]No, no, Ted, stop unpacking. You're just freaking out.
[15:13.07]别 别 Ted 别开箱 你只是吓坏了
[15:16.53]I'm not ready for all the responsibility.
[15:16.53]我还没准备好 承担那些责任
[15:18.11]And-And I'm certainly not ready to be a step-dad to a seven-year-old.
[15:18.11]而 而且我的确没准备好 做一个7岁孩子的继父
[15:22.44]I mean, if I get married and move to the suburbs, in the blink of an eye,
[15:22.44]如果我结婚 然后搬去郊区
[15:25.79]I've become an old man!
[15:25.79]转眼间 我就老了!
[15:29.78]Why, hello, young lady.
[15:29.78]好啊 漂亮小姐
[15:32.49]You want a butterscotch candy?
[15:32.49]想吃奶糖吗?
[15:35.64]What do you mean, "nothing in common"?
[15:35.64]你说"没共同语言"是啥意思?
[15:38.00]We're both seniors.
[15:38.00]我们都年纪不小了啊
[15:43.36]You're cute. How old are you?
[15:43.36]- 你太可爱了 多大了? - 83了
[15:49.47]Thirty-one.
[15:49.47]- 你呢? - 31
[15:53.81]Okay, Ted has officially snapped.
[15:53.81]他彻底崩溃了
[15:56.23]There are moving men coming in ten hours.
[15:56.23]10小时后搬家工就要来了
[15:58.56]His fianc\e is waiting for him in New Jersey.
[15:58.56]他未婚妻还在New Jersey等他
[16:00.93]We have to do something.
[16:00.93]我们必须行动起来
[16:02.65]I got this.
[16:02.65]我来吧
[16:07.64]Hey, bud?
[16:07.64]嘿 兄弟?
[16:09.94]- Why don't you come here for a minute. - What?
[16:09.94]- 过来下 - 啥事?
[16:13.08]Look, I want you to know this is all totally normal.
[16:13.08]听着 这一切都很正常
[16:16.67]Big transitions can be scary, and cold feet--
[16:16.67]重大转变是挺吓人的 害怕 退缩
[16:20.08]well, they're just part of the deal. So...
[16:20.08]很快就会过去了 所以...
[16:24.05]how about you give me the knife?
[16:24.05]把小刀给我吧?
[16:26.05]Give me the knife. Come on.
[16:26.05]快给我啊
[16:32.12]So I can start unpacking, too.
[16:32.12]这样我也可以开箱卸行李了
[16:33.61]I'm staying here right by your side forever, buddy!
[16:33.61]我永远支持你 兄弟!
[16:35.52]- Yeah! - Marshall!
[16:35.52]- 耶! - Marshall!
[16:37.85]Lily, our lives have been good here.
[16:37.85]Lily 我们在这过得很好
[16:40.81]That's why we've been putting off packing.
[16:40.81]所以我们才一直拖延时间没打包
[16:42.62]Because subconsciously, we both know that it would be stupid to leave.
[16:42.62]因为潜意识里 我们都知道离开这里很愚蠢
[16:46.23]It's safe and warm here.
[16:46.23]这里很温暖 又有安全感
[16:47.82]There's a bar downstairs, and a cookie robot in the kitchen.
[16:47.82]楼下有个酒吧 厨房里还有个饼干机器人呢
[16:51.21]This is my home, and I'm never leaving!
[16:51.21]这是我的家 我也不走了!
[16:53.16]Listen to you!
[16:53.16]听你都说了些啥!
[16:54.34]You sound like that fat, dweeby kid at camp.
[16:54.34]你就像露营时软弱的胖孩子
[16:57.00]"Mom, Dad, I want to come home. The cool kids are playing keep-away with my inhaler."
[16:57.00]"爸 妈 我想回家了 坏孩子抢我的呼吸机玩"
[17:01.57]I can't believe my dad read that letter at our wedding.
[17:01.57]真难以置信我老爸 竟然我婚礼上读了那封信
[17:04.65]Marshall, you can't do this to Lily.
[17:04.65]Marshall 你不能对Lily这样
[17:06.07]Yes, I know your new place has had some problems,
[17:06.07]我知道你的新家有些问题
[17:08.28]with the slanted floors and the nearby sewage treatment plant,
[17:08.28]地板是斜的 附近还有个污水处理厂
[17:11.20]but you're gonna turn it into a great home.
[17:11.20]但是你们会把那变成自己的家的
[17:14.26]Tell him, Lily.
[17:14.26]跟他说啊 Lily
[17:15.39]It's a black hole where dreams go to die.
[17:15.39]那是个使所有梦想破灭的黑洞
[17:18.07]I'm not moving, either.
[17:18.07]我也不搬了
[17:19.38]- Oh, come on! - Yes!
[17:19.38]- 哦 得了吧! - 太棒了!
[17:20.87]Okay, you guys finish unpacking.
[17:20.87]你们快开箱
[17:22.90]I'm gonna go bake some cookies to fill R2-Sweet Tooth.
[17:22.90]我去做些饼干 填饱我们的小机器人
[17:26.74]Oh, my God, look at you cowards!
[17:26.74]天啊 看看你们这群胆小鬼!
[17:29.28]So afraid of any kind of change.
[17:29.28]这么怕改变
[17:31.56]So terrified of anything new.
[17:31.56]这么恐惧新事物
[17:33.51]So-so desperate to cling to anything comfortable and familiar.
[17:33.51]如...如此绝望地 要留在舒适熟悉的地方
[17:37.29]I can't move to Japan.
[17:37.29]我不去日本了
[17:39.42]Yes!
[17:39.42]太好了!
[17:40.74]What was I thinking? It's so far away.
[17:40.74]我都是咋想? 那也太远了吧
[17:43.43]And I don't speak the language.
[17:43.43]我也不会说日语
[17:45.22]I didn't even have any good pictures of you guys.
[17:45.22]我连一张你们好看的照片都没有
[17:47.60]Oh, sweetie.
[17:47.60]哦 宝贝
[17:49.72]Everybody says change is so great, right?
[17:49.72]人人都说改变是好事 对吧?
[17:52.26]But what's so great about change?
[17:52.26]可到底好些啥啊?
[17:53.83]Hey, who wants to walk down to our same old bar,
[17:53.83]嘿 谁想去楼下那个老地方?
[17:56.59]sit in our regular booth and order the usual?
[17:56.59]坐在我们的老座位上 点些老菜?
[17:59.02]- Yeah! The usual! - My favorite!
[17:59.02]- 好啊! 老规矩! - 我的最爱!
[18:04.99]Oh, my God.
[18:04.99]哦 我的天啊!
[18:11.99]Well, well, well.
[18:11.99]呦 呦 呦
[18:14.37]I believe someone owes me $200.
[18:14.37]看来有人欠我200美元啊
[18:18.08]Barney, this was never a bet-- nobody...
[18:18.08]Barney 没说打赌啊 没人...
[18:20.51]This proves that I will be this awesome when I'm 80.
[18:20.51]证明我80岁时 还像现在一样性感
[18:24.28]Arthritis five.
[18:24.28]看我关节炎了还这么酷
[18:29.46]- I'm moving to New Jersey. - What?
[18:29.46]- 我决定去New Jersey了 - 啥?
[18:31.82]And you and Marshall should move to your new place, and Robin should go to Japan.
[18:31.82]你和Marshall也应该搬走 Robin还是应该去日本
[18:35.39]Why?
[18:35.39]为啥啊?
[18:36.32]Because we're gonna get older whether we like it or not,
[18:36.32]因为不管我们愿不愿意 我们还是会变老的
[18:39.09]so the only question is whether we want to get on with our lives
[18:39.09]问题是我们是去面对我们的生活
[18:42.94]or desperately cling to the past and end up like that.
[18:42.94]还是绝望地依附着过去 像他那样了却一生
[18:46.71]You mean awesome?
[18:46.71]你说很爽的过一生吗?
[18:48.68]I'm 80, dude, and I'm making out with a 22-year-old.
[18:48.68]伙计 我现在80了 还能和一个辣妹亲热呢
[18:54.00]Take me to your place, cheri.
[18:54.00]带我去你家吧 帅哥
[18:56.56]I want to see your World War II medals.
[18:56.56]我想看看你二战时的勋章
[18:59.52]In a minute, mon petite.
[18:59.52]马上就来 小美人
[19:02.12]All right, so that doesn't count.
[19:02.12]好吧 这不算数
[19:04.12]What? Why?
[19:04.12]啥? 为啥?
[19:05.11]She's French-- that's like playing tennis with the net down.
[19:05.11]她是个法国人 这就像放倒球网打网球一样
[19:08.92]You know what?
[19:08.92]知道吗?
[19:10.45]I'll cover the security deposit.
[19:10.45]我来付房子押金
[19:12.29]I'm glad to, because...
[19:12.29]我很乐意 因为...
[19:13.94]every dent in that place represents a memory that I'll cherish forever.
[19:13.94]那个家里的每一个凹痕 都是我将永远珍藏的回忆
[19:17.73]But on one condition: we all put aside ten bucks every week for the next year,
[19:17.73]就一个条件 我们现在起每周都为明年存10块钱
[19:22.63]and we come back here and we buy that 50-year-old scotch,
[19:22.63]然后我们来这 点那瓶50年的苏格兰威士忌
[19:25.93]and we toast the incredible life-changing year we've all had.
[19:25.93]为我们这个不可思议的 人生大逆转之年干杯
[19:29.80]Get out of our booth.
[19:29.80]从我们的座位上滚开
[19:34.75]Me with my new family, Marshall and Lily in their new apartment,
[19:34.75]我和我新组的家庭 住进新公寓里的Marshall和Lily
[19:37.96]and Robin as the number one English-speaking journalist in the Pacific Rim,
[19:37.96]还有太平洋沿岸 最棒的美裔记者Robin
[19:42.97]visiting us here in New York to celebrate this day--
[19:42.97]来纽约相聚庆祝这一天
[19:46.52]the day we closed an incredible chapter in our lives, only to open up a new one.
[19:46.52]我们告别过去 迎接明天的一天
[19:52.64]- Um, I think I left my cell... - Get out of here.
[19:52.64]- 呃 我把手机丢在... - 滚
[19:57.85]And one year later, that's exactly what we did.
[19:57.85]一年后 我们做到了
[20:00.92]And so let's raise a glass of $2,500 scotch to one hell of a year.
[20:00.92]举起这2500块的苏格兰威士忌 为这精彩的一年干杯吧
[20:09.81]- Amazing. - That's unbelievable.
[20:09.81]- 不可思议 - 难以置信啊
[20:12.04]It's kind of smoky, with a hint of aged cedar and...
[20:12.04]有点烟熏味 还有陈年雪松和...的味道
[20:15.83]Do you guys taste the difference and ten-dollar scotch?
[20:15.83]你们觉得和10块钱的威士忌有区别吗?
[20:18.02]- Not at all. - No difference.
[20:18.02]- 一点也没 - 没有
[20:18.90]I want to cut mine with Red Bull.
[20:18.90]我还是喝红牛吧
[20:20.72]Oh, Wendy, can you take a picture?
[20:20.72]Wendy 能给我们拍张照吗?
[20:23.95]A lot of things did change that year, but some things stayed the same.
[20:23.95]很多事情在那年都改变了 但有些事永远不变
[20:28.87]So, uh, what do you say we move this party upstairs to the apartment?
[20:28.87]我们去楼上继续狂欢怎么样?
[20:32.78]- Yeah. - Great idea.
[20:32.78]- 好 - 好主意
[20:42.79]What the...
[20:42.79]搞啥...
[20:45.67]Barney, this is an intervention.
[20:45.67]Barney 我们要批斗你了
[20:48.85]I'm sorry, I can't hear you.
[20:48.85]不好意思 听不见
[20:51.73]Enough with the "old man" bit.
[20:51.73]别再扮"老鬼"了
[20:54.37]What about the old sand pit?
[20:54.37]什么 老沙坑?
[20:56.72]Let it go.
[20:56.72]算了吧
[20:58.25]Let It Snow?
[20:58.25]下雪吧?
[20:59.65]I love that old ditty!
[20:59.65]我爱死那段小曲了!
[21:03.49]I'm getting my flail.
[21:03.49]我拿流星锤去
[21:05.68]You're setting sail?
[21:05.68]你要启航了?
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