你当过好友的“情感垃圾桶”吗？

Emotional dumping is when you verbally offload the intense rage, fear or sadness you feel onto someone you think should care.

Emotional dumping指你把自己的愤怒、恐惧或者悲伤一股脑儿地说给一个你认为在乎你的人听，字面意思是“情感倾倒”。其实就是把不开心的事拿出来跟好友倾诉。

也就是说，你把这个朋友当成了你的“情感垃圾桶”(emotional trashcan)，各种负面情绪都会倾倒给Ta。

For example, if you've been the target of workplace bullying, you might express your outrage onto HR or senior managers, expecting them to do something immediately but become even more upset when they react in an oppositional way.

比如，你在办公室一直被欺凌，你去找人力或者上一级的领导发泄一通，希望他们能立即有所行动，结果，他们完全不予理会。这让你更加难过。

Or, if you just broke up with your boyfriend, and you felt heartbroken.

或者，你刚刚跟男友分手，你觉得自己心都碎了。

You might call your best friend, calling your HR and manager all the bad names, or talking about all the best memories you have had with your ex and how sad you were at the moment. All your friend needs to do is to listen.

这个时候，你可能会给你最好的朋友打电话，放肆地咒骂公司人力和经理，或者跟好友倾诉你跟男友曾经有多美好，而你此刻有多伤心。你的朋友只需要静静听着就可以了。

For example:

Jill called today and took the longest emotional dumping on me. He said he misses Jane and he wanted her back.

Jill今天给我打电话了，跟我倾诉了好长时间。他说他很想念Jane，他想跟她合好。

不过，心理学家表示，情感垃圾听多了会对自己的情绪状态产生负面影响，别人跟你倾诉完以后，心情轻松，继续开心地生活了，而作为听众的你，可能因为听得太专注而导致情绪低落。