生活大爆炸第二季01.The Bad Fish Paradigm (Bad Fish范式):Sheldon保守秘密四处搬家事件

[00:00.00]美剧MP3+LRC [00:00.16]******g is not technically yogurt, 知道了吧 你吃的这个 不算是真的酸奶酪 [00:02.28]because it doesn't have enough live acidophilus cultures. 因为里面没有足够的 活的嗜酸培养菌 [00:04.92]It's really just ice milk with carrageenan added for thickness. 只不过是冰牛奶里加了点 角叉胶 增加粘稠度 [00:08.43]Oh,that's very interesting. 喔 真有意思哈 [00:10.54]It's also not pink and has no berries. 它也不真是粉红色 也没有天然浆果粒 [00:14.52]Yeah,but it doesn't really answer my question. 嗯 可这也没有回答我的问题呐 [00:17.02]What was your question again? 你问的啥问题? [00:18.56]Do you want some? 你要来点儿不? [00:21.75]Right. No. 对对 不用了 [00:22.71]- I'm lactose intolerant. - Right. - 我受不了乳糖的 - 对哦 [00:24.07]- So,gas. - Yeah,got it. - 吃了会放屁的 - 好吧 明白了 [00:27.22]Well... good night. 那么... 晚安了 [00:44.27]What are you doing? 你这是做什么呢? [00:45.55]Oh,there's a draft. 哦 那边有阵风 [00:48.22]I didn't feel a draft. 我没觉得有风啊 [00:50.63]Why don't we just go into,uh,your... 那我们还是去... 你的... [00:53.78]Yeah,you know what,maybe we should slow things down a little. 我说 也许我们不该那么着急 [00:56.68]No,no,I didn't mean to go into your apartment to go fast. 不 我不是说要去你公寓 去急着干嘛干嘛 [00:59.53]No,I know. 当然了 我知道 [01:01.55]I know what you meant,it's just... this is only our first date. 我知道你不是那意思 只是... 这才是咱俩第一次约会 [01:04.45]Yeah,okay,sure,no problem. 嗯 好啊 没问题 [01:05.85]Why don't we just figure out where we're going and when we want to get there, 那我们就先想想 下次要去哪儿 准备啥时候到那儿 [01:10.72]and then rate of speed equals distance over time. 这样距离除以时间 就知道速度了呗 [01:16.52]Solve for R. 问题解决 [01:19.53]Or we could just wing it. 我们也可以到时候再想嘛 [01:22.09]That might work,too. 那没准也行 [01:24.74]- Good night,Leonard. - Good night. - 晚安 Leonard - 晚安 [01:31.77]He's coming-- screensaver! 他来了 快上屏保! [01:38.39]Oh,hey,Leonard. How was your date? 嘿 Leonard 约会怎么样哇? [01:42.23]Bite me. 要你管 [01:45.34]Sheldon,how could you just sit there and let them spy on me? Sheldon 你怎么能傻坐着 眼睁睁看他们监视我呢? [01:48.88]They were clever,Leonard. 他们油菜啊 Leonard [01:49.89]They exploited my complete lack of interest in what you were doing. 他们完全明白 我对你那些破事儿 一点兴趣没有 [01:54.72]You should thank us. 你还该谢谢我们呢 [01:56.08]When future generations try to determine why your relationship with Penny crashed and burned, 要是后来人想弄明白 你和Penny的恋情为啥会土崩瓦解 [02:00.81]this right here is the black box. 这玩意儿就是黑匣子呐! [02:04.12]What are you talking about? The date went fine. 你胡说什么 约会挺好的 [02:06.76]Dude,she said she wants to slow things down. 拜托 她都说了 想要慢慢来 [02:08.77]Okay,so she said she wants to slow things down. 好吧 她是说了 想要慢慢来 [02:11.89]It's like saying,"I'm really enjoying this meal. 意思差不多就是 "今天的晚餐我非常喜欢 [02:15.86]I'm going to slow down and savor it." 我得慢慢来 好好回味一下" [02:18.24]No,it's like,"This fish tastes bad, 才怪 她的意思是 "这鱼真难吃死了 [02:21.61]so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out." 我得慢慢来 吐光了它" [02:27.66]- You being the fish. - I'm not the fish. - 这臭鱼说的就是你! - 我才不是这臭鱼呢 [02:30.02]Oh,really? Did you make a second date? 真的? 你俩定了下一次约会吗? [02:32.26]Well,no,we sort of decided to wing it. 这倒没有... 我们说好了 到时候再想 [02:34.16]Oh,even I know that's lame. 得了吧 连我都觉得这太逊了 [02:37.82]Okay,all right,let's assume your hypothesis. 行啊 咱就说说你的假设 [02:40.50]We went to dinner,we talked,we laughed,we kissed. 我们一起去吃饭 有说有笑 有吻有抱 [02:43.97]Where could I have possibly gone wrong? 这还能错到哪儿去啊? [02:45.83]Think back,Leonard. 你好好想想 Leonard [02:47.02]The littlest things can set women off. 再小的事情都能让女人爆发 [02:49.15]Like,"Hey,the waitress is hot,I bet we could get her to come home with us." 比方说 "嘿 这服务生真辣 我打赌 肯定能让她跟咱回家" [02:54.03]Or,"How much does your mom weigh? 或者 "你妈妈有多重呐? [02:55.86]I want to know what I'm getting into." 我想知道我搭上的是啥样的妞儿" [02:58.24]I didn't say anything like that. 这种话我才不会说 [02:59.66]Good,'cause they don't work. 很好 因为这么说不管用 [03:02.55]They also don't care for it if you stare at them and hyperventilate. 她们也不关心 你是不是盯着她们 呼吸加速 [03:05.27]Sadly,that's my home run swing. 挺惨的 在我们家 这就像是家族传统 [03:08.34]Look,everything went fine. 我说 一切都挺好的 [03:10.66]I didn't even have to refer to my impromptu conversation starters. 连事先准备的一些开场白都没用到呢 [03:14.95]That woman across the hall is into me. 走廊对面那个女孩 就是喜欢我嘛 [03:17.80]Let's go to the tape. 咱还是看带子吧 [03:21.35]Look at her reaction to the good night kiss. 你瞧她临别一吻的时候 那反应 [03:23.72]No change in respiration,pupils un-dilated,no flushing of the chest. 呼吸平稳 瞳孔没有放大 胸口也没啥起伏 [03:28.24]Nice close-up,by the way. 这特写镜头拍的真赞 [03:30.62]Interesting. Her jaws are clenched: no tongue access. 有意思嘿 她的下巴很紧 也没有用舌头 [03:33.82]Clearly a bad sign amongst mating humans. 对于寻偶期的人类来说 这可不是啥好消息 [03:37.62]That's not a bad sign. 这怎么就不是好消息了 [03:39.26]Please,you might as well have been two iguana with no dewlap enlargement. 得了吧 还不如说你们是两只鬣蜥 只是喉部没有垂肉罢了 [03:44.02]And the worst sign of all is you're here and not there. 最糟的就是 这会儿你不在她家 而在这里! [03:46.80]I'm not there because I'm taking things slow,which, 我不在她家 因为我也决定慢慢来 这个... [03:50.95]by the way,compared to you guys,approaches warp speed. 跟你们比起来 都快接近星际速度了 [03:55.36]And take down that camera. 快把摄像头给我撤了 [03:59.68]He was a lot more fun when he had no hope. 他心里没牵没挂的时候 真有意思多了 [04:05.34]Give him time. 给他点时间吧 [04:40.21]Oh,hi,Penny. [04:41.49]FYI,the hot water is inadequate on machine two,so colors only, 你好啊 Penny [04:43.49]顺便说句 2号机器的热水不足 别深色浅色混着洗 [04:45.56]and four is still releasing the fabric softener too early in the cycle, [04:48.49]so I'd avoid using that for your delicates. 4号机器呢 洗衣程序中 还是会提前放出织物柔顺剂 [04:50.24]Thanks. 所以你那些精致的衣服 还是别用那台了 [04:52.24]谢了 [04:54.93]Oh,good Lord... [04:56.21]why don't you just take your clothes down to the river and beat them with a rock? 老天爷啊... [04:58.21]你还不如把衣服拿到河边 搁在石头上猛捶一阵 [05:04.66]Sheldon,can I ask you a question? [05:07.75]I would prefer that you not,but I won't go so far as to forbid it. Sheldon 我问你个问题行不? [05:09.75]我当然最好你别问 不过也不会阻止你 [05:12.22]All right,I heard yes,so... [05:15.28]Okay,here's my question. 那... 我就当你同意了... [05:17.08]Has Leonard ever dated, you know,a regular girl? 我想问问你 [05:19.08]Leonard以前有没有 跟正常的女孩子约会过? [05:22.96]Well,I assume you're not referring to digestive regularity. [05:24.96]我想你指的 应该不是消化功能正常吧 [05:27.55]Because I've come to learn that such inquiries are inappropriate. [05:29.55]要是那样的话 我想这问题问的不合适 [05:31.74]No,I meant,has he ever been involved with someone who wasn't a brainiac? [05:33.74]我是说 他有没有跟 没那么大学问的女孩子谈过? [05:36.78]Well,a few years ago,he did go out with a woman who had a PhD in French literature. [05:38.78]话说几年前 他确实跟一个 学法国文学的女博士有过一段儿 [05:44.09]How is that not a brainiac? [05:46.19]Well,for one thing,she was French. 这还不算有大学问? [05:48.19]理由一 她是法国人 [05:50.74]For another,it was literature. [05:52.74]理由二 她读的是文学 [05:59.37]So... [06:02.23]do you think that if Leonard and I keep dating,he'll eventually get bored with me? 那你觉得... [06:04.23]如果我和Leonard继续好下去 他会不会有一天觉得我很没劲啊? [06:12.98]- That depends. - On what? [06:15.51]- Do you have a working knowledge of quantum physics? - No. - 那得看情况 - 什么情况? [06:17.51]- 你懂量子物理吗? - 不懂 [06:19.63]- Do you speak Klingon? - No. [06:21.63]- 你会说克林贡语吗?(星际迷航) - 不会 [06:23.59]- You know any card tricks? - Okay,you know what... [06:25.59]- 你会耍牌吗? - 行了 我说... [06:28.46]I get it. [06:29.36]Leonard has no business being involved with a waitress-slash-actress 我明白了 [06:32.85]who felt so insecure that she lied to him about finishing community college. Leonard和一个服务员兼二流演员 没有共同语言 [06:34.85]而且她还骗他说 上完了社区大学 心里正发慌呢 [06:37.50]Why would you lie about that? [06:39.08]Well,he was going on and on about this college and that grad school,and I... 你为什么撒谎? [06:42.22]I didn't want him to think I was some kind of stupid loser. 他总是在说这大学怎样 那个研究生院怎么样 我就... [06:44.22]我不想让他觉得我很傻很衰嘛 [06:45.75]You thought the opposite of "stupid loser" was "community college graduate"? [06:47.75]你觉得"很傻很衰"的反义词 是"社区大学毕业生"? [06:54.78]You know,there are a lot of successful people in this country who are community college graduates. [06:56.78]很多成功人士 都是从社区大学毕业的 [06:59.49]Yeah,but you are neither. [07:01.49]没错 可你哪个都挨不上边 [07:03.63]Right. Okay,look,this is between you and me. [07:06.04]You cannot tell Leonard any of this. 对 好吧 你得替我保密 [07:08.04]啥也不要告诉Leonard [07:10.30]- You're asking me to keep a secret? - Yeah. [07:13.30]Well,I'm sorry,but you would have had to express that desire before revealing the secret, - 你要我保守秘密? - 是的 [07:15.30]那真对不起了 你应该在说出秘密前 表达出要我保密的意思 [07:17.94]so that I could choose whether or not I wanted to accept the covenant of secret keeping. [07:19.94]我好选择 到底要不要替你保密 [07:22.72]You can't impose a secret on an ex post facto basis. [07:24.72]你事后再说 这怎么行呢 [07:27.54]What? [07:29.26]Secret keeping is a complicated endeavor. 什么? [07:31.68]One has to be concerned not only about what one says, 保守秘密是一项艰巨复杂的任务 [07:34.14]but about facial expressions, autonomic reflexes. 不但要注意说的话 [07:37.32]When I try to deceive,I myself have more nervous tics than a Lyme disease research facility. 还得注意面部表情 习惯性反应 [07:39.32]我说谎的时候 因为紧张产生的扁虱(tick) 比莱姆关节炎研究设备产生的还多 [07:48.82]It's a joke. [07:50.25]It relies on the homonymic relationship between "tick," 这是笑话啊 [07:52.49]the bloodsucking arachnid,and "tic," the involuntary muscular contraction. 同音词嘛 "tick"是指 [07:54.49]吸血蜘蛛 而"tic"是无意识的肌肉痉挛 [08:01.06]I made it up myself. [08:03.06]我自己编的 [08:05.09]Okay,look,if Leonard finds out that I lied,I will absolutely die of embarrassment. [08:07.09]听着 如果Leonard发现我说谎 我一定羞愧自尽了 [08:10.31]Physiologically impossible. [08:11.52]Oh,Sheldon,please. 生理学上讲是不可能的 [08:13.37]Look,I am asking you as a friend. 哦 Sheldon 拜托 [08:16.76]So you're saying that friendship contains within it an inherent obligation to maintain confidences? 我是以朋友的名义请求你 [08:18.76]照你这么说 朋友就要无条件的保守秘密? [08:21.83]Well,yeah. [08:23.52]Interesting. 是啊 [08:25.89]One more question,and perhaps I should have led with this. 有意思 [08:28.69]When did we become friends? 再一个问题 或许应该这样问 [08:30.69]我们什么时候成朋友了? [08:33.15]i.e.,I couldn't become Green Lantern unless I was chosen by the Guardians of Oa, [08:35.15]也就是说 要不被总部守护先知选中 我就成不了绿灯侠 (漫画形象) [08:37.31]but given enough start-up capital and an adequate research facility,I could be Batman. [08:39.31]但如果给我足够的启动资金和 足够的科研设备 我就能成为蝙蝠侠 [08:46.32]- You could be Batman? - Sure. I'm Batman. See? [08:48.32]- 你能成为蝙蝠侠? - 当然 我就是蝙蝠侠 看见没? [08:53.12]- Hi,guys. - Hi,Penny. [08:55.12]- 嗨 伙计们 - 嗨 Penny [08:56.87]Penny,if you're not doing anything Friday night,I thought maybe we could go see a movie. [08:58.87]Penny 你周五晚上有空的话 我们去看电影吧 [09:00.58]Oh,um,you know,I think I have the dinner shift on Friday. [09:03.56]Okay,what about Saturday? 呃 我周五晚上要轮班 [09:05.20]You know,I'm not sure; the manager hasn't posted the schedule yet. 好吧 周六呢? [09:08.35]- How about I let you know? - Great. 说不准 经理还没公布排班表呢 [09:10.48]So you just let me know when you know. Okay,so... - 出来了 我再告诉你? - 很好 [09:13.46]Oh,God,I am the bad fish. 那你知道了就告诉我 好的 那... [09:15.46]天呐 我就是那条臭鱼 [09:17.97]What did I do wrong? [09:19.72]Why are you asking me? 我哪做错了? [09:21.86]I have no information about your interactions with Penny other than what you have provided me, 你为什么问我? [09:25.20]nor do I have any method of learning such things. 你和Penny的事儿 除了你已经告诉我的 我啥也不知道 [09:27.20]我也没有本事学到 [09:30.61]- What does that mean? - Nothing. [09:32.70]You seem to be implying an informational back-channel - 这话什么意思? - 没什么 [09:35.11]between me and Penny where obviously none exists. 你说的倒像是 我和Penny背地里通了气 [09:37.43]No,I didn't. 很明显 这是没有的事 [09:38.47]I just think you need to be careful how you phrase things,sir. 没 我没觉得 [09:40.47]我想你要注意你的表达了 先生 [09:44.44]What's going on with you? [09:46.17]I might ask you the same question. 你怎么回事? [09:48.09]Why do you insist on attempting to drag me into matters which have nothing to do with me, 这问题我也得问问你吧 [09:50.09]那些跟我无关的事儿 你何必非要把我扯进去? [09:52.02]but exist between you and Penny, a person to whom I barely speak? [09:54.02]都是你和Penny之间的事 我跟她连话都不怎么说的 [10:03.78]What's wrong with your face? [10:06.49]There's no reason to bring my looks into this. 你脸怎么了? [10:08.49]我脸这样 没啥原因 [10:10.83]- Good day,Leonard. - What [10:13.27]I said,"Good day." - 祝你今天过的愉快 Leonard - 什么? [10:15.27]我说 "祝你今天过的愉快" [10:18.42]Good day? [10:20.42]过的愉快? [10:22.03]Also today,we have a fresh-caught Alaska salmon, [10:24.44]and that's served with a teriyaki glaze and sticky rice. 今天还为您供应 新鲜的阿拉斯加大马哈鱼 [10:27.05]Our soup of the day is... 配上烧汁和糯米饭 [10:27.82]You must release me from my oath. 今天的汤是... [10:29.59]你必须将我从我的誓言中解放出来 [10:33.11]Sheldon,I'm working. [10:35.50]Why don't you take a minute to decide? Sheldon 我在工作 [10:37.27]你们花几分钟决定一下吧 [10:39.75]I can't keep your secret,Penny. [10:41.35]I'm going to fold like an energy-based de novo protein in conformational space. 我不能保守你的秘密了 Penny [10:43.12]我就像构象空间里 基于能量的内源蛋白 要折叠起来了 (fold 也有失败的意思) [10:46.97]Like a Renaissance tryptich. [10:49.12]Like a cheap suit. 就像是文艺复兴时期的三联画 (教堂祭坛上的饰物 两翼可向内折叠) [10:51.49]Look,why is it so hard for you to keep one little secret? 还有廉价的西装 [10:54.29]I'm constitutionally incapable. 你保守个小秘密 咋就这么难呢? [10:56.37]That's why I was refused clearance for a very prestigious government research fellowship 我天生就保守不住! [10:58.14]所以我上次申请那项高端政府研究奖学金 证明开不出来 [11:00.25]at a secret military supercollider located beneath a fake agricultural station [11:02.02]项目里的超级对撞机 位于密歇根州 Traverse城东南12.5英里的 [11:03.62]12.5 miles southeast of Traverse City,Michigan. [11:05.39]一个空设的农学院地下 [11:11.85]Which you did not hear about from me. [11:13.62]我没告诉过你啊 [11:15.49]Look,just forget I told you about me... [11:18.57]not graduating from community college,okay? 你就别老记着我说过... [11:20.86]Forget? You want me to forget? 社区大学没毕业 好吗? [11:22.46]This mind does not forget. 别老记着? 这能忘得掉吗? [11:24.94]I haven't forgotten a single thing since the day my mother stopped breastfeeding me. 我这脑子 啥东西忘得掉啊! [11:26.71]从我妈给我断奶后 我就没忘掉过一件事 [11:30.08]- It was a drizzly Tuesday. - Okay... [11:33.10]Look,you promised me you would keep my secret, - 那天是周二 下着毛毛雨 - 好了... [11:35.22]so you're just gonna have to figure out a way to do it. 你答应过我要保守秘密 [11:36.99]那你就想个办法别漏嘴 [11:39.12]Leonard,I'm moving out. [11:40.89]Leonard 我要搬出去 [11:42.55]What do you mean you're moving out? Why? [11:44.81]There doesn't have to be a reason. 什么叫"要搬出去"? 为什么? [11:48.74]Yeah,there kinda does. 不一定非要有理由嘛 [11:50.59]Not necessarily. 是啊 总该有吧 [11:51.83]This is a classic example of Munchausen's Trilemma. [11:54.71]Either the reason is predicated on a series of sub-reasons leading to an infinite regression, 不一定非得有 [11:54.80]这是Munchausen三难推理的典型例子 [11:58.93]or it tracks back to arbitrary axiomatic statements, 要么就是 这个前提通过一系列 不断弱化的次前提 已经得到阐述 [12:01.30]or it's ultimately circular, 要么就是 能从所谓偶然的公理陈述中 找到答案 [12:02.74]i.e.I'm moving out because I'm moving out. [12:04.27]也有可能是终极循环 [12:05.71]也就是说 因为我要搬出去 所以我要搬出去 [12:07.99]I'm still confused. [12:09.31]Leonard,I don't see how I could have made it any simpler. [12:10.96]我还是不懂 [12:13.45]Hey,qu'est que s'up? Leonard 我已经说得够明白的了 [12:16.76]We just got back from that exhibit of those plasticized human cadavers. 嘿 伙计们 还好吗? (蹩脚法语) [12:19.87]And some of those skinless chicks were Hot! 我们刚去看了塑化人体标本展 [12:22.84]那些个没皮的小妞儿 真是辣哟! [12:24.48]If you'll excuse me,I'm going to pack. [12:28.27]That's kind of an overreaction to a little harmless necrophilia. 抱歉 我得去收拾了 [12:31.24]他对我单纯的恋尸癖 反应还真大 [12:33.99]It's not you,Howard. He says he's moving out. [12:37.39]What did you do? Howard 不关你事 他说他要搬出去 [12:39.28]Did you change the contrast or brightness settings on the television? 你对他干了啥? [12:42.92]No. 你改了电视机的对比度和亮度? [12:43.52]Did you take a Band-Aid off in front of him? [12:46.60]No. 没啊 [12:47.22]Did you buy generic ketchup, forget to rinse the sink, 你在他面前扒了创可贴? [12:49.74]talk to him through the bathroom door? 没 [12:50.19]你买了三无番茄酱? 忘了洗水池? [12:53.25]Adjust the thermostat,cook with cilantro,pronounce the "t" in often? 还是隔着厕所门同他讲话? [12:56.22]调了恒温器? 煮菜放了芫荽叶? "t"那音总是忘了发? [12:58.76]No. [13:00.90]Did you make fun of trains? 没有 [13:05.33]No,I didn't do anything. He's just gone insane. 你是不是拿火车开玩笑了? [13:08.41]Well,we all knew this day was coming. 没有 我啥都没干 他疯了 [13:12.87]Well,that was fast. 也是 这天迟早会来的 [13:14.77]It's my pre-packed disaster evacuation bag. 你动作还真快 [13:18.70]It's recommended by the Department of Homeland Security. 这是我早准备好的避难行囊 [13:22.02]And Sarah Connor. 国土安全部推荐的 [13:25.11]Where are you going to live? 还有Sarah Connor ("终结者"女主人公) [13:26.85]Until I find a permanent place,I will stay with friends. 你打算住哪儿? [13:30.04]Bye. 在我找到寓所之前 我先在朋友家挤挤 [13:34.40]Well... you can't stay with me. 回见 [13:36.23]I have a teeny-tiny apartment. 呃... 你不能住我那儿 [13:38.13]Excuse me,but isn't hosting guests an aspect of "manushya yajna," 我的公寓小得可怜 [13:42.50]one of the five central religious duties or sacrifices of the Hindu householder? 广纳宾客不正是"向人致敬"的一部分吗? [13:45.47]"向人致敬"不是印度五大宗教戒规之一吗? [13:50.57]I hate trains. [13:53.54]我讨厌火车 [13:58.28]Don't be ridiculous,you love trains. [14:02.17]Yes,I do. Come on. 别开玩笑了 你可喜欢火车了 [14:06.53]See you later,Leonard. 啊 没错 来吧 [14:09.50]回见 Leonard [14:14.65]This could work. [14:17.62]还真管用 [14:26.23]This is a very old building. [14:28.36]60 years. It used to be a watch factory. 这栋楼有年头了 [14:32.20]What? 造了六十年了 以前是手表厂 [14:33.25]Don't you worry about the residual radium from the luminous dials? [14:35.17]怎么了? [14:37.61]Not until now! 你不担心残留在发光表盘里的镭吗? [14:40.63]I can't believe I didn't bring my Geiger counter. 你干嘛要提! [14:44.22]I had it on my bed and I didn't pack it. 我竟然没带盖格计数器 (用于测量放射性物质) [14:47.40]Well,if you're not comfortable staying here,Sheldon... 就在床头 我居然没拿 [14:48.99]I'm kidding,I packed it. 那么... Sheldon 要是你觉得住着不舒服 [14:52.04]It was a joke. 我开玩笑的 我带来了 [14:53.16]I was subverting the conversational expectations. [14:56.11]I believe they call that the,uh,ol' switcharoo. 是个笑话 [14:56.13]我就是要破坏你的语境期待 [14:59.08]那叫啥来着 "出其不意" (语言的突然变化 以求意想不到的效果) [15:01.07]Terrific. [15:04.04]好极了 [15:06.40]Is that woman Aishwarya Rai? [15:08.38]Yes,isn't she an amazing actress? 那女的是Aishwarya Rai吗? (印度当红影星) [15:10.16]Actually,I'd say she's a poor man's Madhuri Dixit. 是的 她是个很棒的演员吧 [15:13.77]How dare you! 我倒觉得她是可怜虫心中的Madhuri Dixit (印度90年代知名影星 后结婚生子) [15:16.02]Aishwarya Rai is a goddess. 你敢再说一遍! [15:18.19]By comparison,Madhuri Dixit is a leprous prostitute. Aishwarya Rai是我的女神 [15:21.16]相比之下 Madhuri Dixit 就是得麻风病的妓女 [15:24.13]Sorry,I didn't mean to offend you. [15:28.19]Obviously,you're not that familiar with Indian cinema. 对不起 我没想到会冒犯你 [15:31.16]显然你不了解印度电影 [15:39.92]Who is it? [15:41.18]Stripper-Gram! [15:42.89]谁啊? [15:44.15]脱衣舞娘来喽! [15:47.03]Tag,you're It. [15:50.36]Shouldn't you put him in a brown paper bag and set him on fire? 交给你了 [15:53.33]你就不能把他塞进牛皮纸袋里 烧了算了? [15:57.00]I've never slept on an air mattress before. [16:00.71]No lumbar support whatsoever. 我从来没睡过气垫床 [16:04.08]Maybe you'd be happier on a park bench. 腰部都没东西撑着 [16:07.05]你大概是想睡公园的长椅上是吧 [16:08.57]I don't see any way to get a park bench in here. [16:12.22]Do you want to switch? 我认为 你没有办法把长椅弄到这儿来 [16:13.46]No,that's fine. [16:14.82]I'm perfectly comfortable sleeping on a bouncy castle. 要换一下吗? [16:16.43]不用了 这样挺好 [16:17.79]睡在充气城堡上可舒服呢 [16:20.64]Get out of bed. We're switching. [16:21.90]- Now,only if you want to. - Just get in the bed! [16:23.61]下床来 我和你换 [16:25.49]What's going on? - 我没逼着你换 - 快下床! [16:27.35]Are you boys roughhousing? 这是怎么了? [16:31.43]We're just talking,Ma! 你们两个臭小子 闹什么闹? [16:33.61]If you don't settle down right now, 老妈 我们只是在聊天! [16:36.16]I'm not going to let you have any more sleepovers! 要是你们再不给我安生点 [16:39.13]看我以后还让不让你去朋友家过夜! [16:41.16]For God's sake,Ma,I'm 27 years old! [16:45.00]And it's not even a school night! 老天啊 老妈 我都27了! [16:47.97]明天又不上学! [16:51.88]Comfy now? [16:54.85]舒服了吧? [16:59.30]That poster of Halle Berry is a little unnerving. [17:03.63]So don't look at it. 那张Halle Barry的海报让我有点紧张 (好莱坞女星 曾出演猫女) [17:05.73]She's like my fourth favorite Catwoman. 别看就是了 [17:07.83]No kidding. 她是我第四爱的猫女郎 [17:08.67]Yeah,Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer,Eartha Kitt,and then her. [17:10.80]不是吧 [17:12.39]What about Lee Merriweather? 对 前三个是Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer 和Eartha Kitt [17:14.11]Oh,I forgot about Lee Merriweather. Lee Merriweather呢? [17:16.96]Well,I'm glad that's settled. 噢 我把她忘了 [17:19.79]That makes Halle Berry my fifth favorite Catwoman. 好吧 终于搞定了 [17:22.93]It's Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer, Eartha Kitt,Lee Merriweather-- 那Halle Barry只能排第五了 [17:25.97]Please,I'm begging you. Go to sleep. Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer Eartha Kitt Lee Merriweather... [17:28.27]I'm trying. I'm counting Catwomen. 求求你了 睡觉吧 [17:31.24]我在努力嘛 都在数猫女郎了 [17:35.87]She did make a fine mutant in the X-Men movies,though. [17:38.59]Oh,for God's sake. 她在X战警里演的变种人倒是不赖 [17:39.56]She's not my favorite of the X-Men. [17:40.88]In order that would be: Wolverine,Cyclops-- 噢 我求求你了 [17:43.13]Oh,wait,I forgot Professor X. X战警里我最喜欢的不是她 [17:44.69]Professor X,Wolverine,Cyclops, Iceman,then Storm,Angel,the Beast-- 要排序的话应该是:金钢狼 雷射眼 [17:46.10]噢 等等 我忘了X教授 [17:49.07]No,wait,Nightcrawler. X教授 金钢狼 雷射眼 冰人 然后是暴风女 天使 还有野兽 [17:51.11]Professor X,Nightcrawler,Wolverine, Cyclops,Iceman,then Storm,Angel... 不对 等等 还有蓝魔人 [17:54.08]X教授 蓝魔人 金钢狼 雷射眼 冰人 暴风女 天使... [17:56.72]I'm coming! [17:59.69]来了! [18:02.08]There he is. There my old buddy bud bud. [18:05.05]是他 我的老-伙-计 [18:11.70]What's with him? [18:13.06]Koothrappali dumped him on me, and he couldn't get to sleep, [18:15.58]so I gave him a glass of warm milk with a handful of my mom's Valium in it... 他是怎么了? [18:16.03]Koothrappali把他扔给了我 他睡不着觉 [18:18.55]所以我给他倒了杯温牛奶 里面放了一把我妈的安眠药 [18:21.77]but he still wouldn't shut up,so tag,you're It. [18:24.74]可他还是不肯住嘴 得了 还给你吧 [18:28.97]I'm ba-a-a-ack. [18:32.23]I still don't know why you left. 我回...来了 [18:33.99]I can't tell you. 我还是不知道你为啥要走 [18:35.28]Why not? [18:36.60]I promised Penny. 不能告诉你 [18:39.71]You promised Penny what? 为什么? [18:39.57]我答应过Penny [18:41.29]I wouldn't tell you the secret. 你答应她什么了? [18:44.26]我答应她保密啊 [18:47.81]What secret? Tell me the secret. [18:50.78]什么秘密? 快告诉我 [18:54.01]Mom smokes in the car. [18:56.98]老妈在车里抽烟 [18:58.81]Jesus is okay with it but we can't tell Dad. [19:01.78]耶稣觉得没问题 不过不能告诉老爸 [19:04.33]Not that secret. The other secret. [19:06.74]- I'm Batman-- Shh! - Damn it! Sheldon! 不是这个 另一个秘密 [19:09.71]- 我是蝙蝠侠 嘘! - 我靠! Sheldon! [19:13.49]You said Penny told you a secret. What's the secret? [19:17.06]Okay,I'll tell you,but you can't tell Leonard. 你说 Penny跟你说了个秘密 什么秘密? [19:20.03]好吧 我告诉你 不过你不能告诉Leonard [19:22.21]I promise. [19:24.30]Penny lied about graduating from community college 我保证 [19:27.07]'cause she's afraid she's not smart enough for Leonard. Penny说她是社区大学毕业 其实没这回事 [19:30.04]因为她怕自己不够聪明 配不上Leonard [19:34.62]So it's nothing I did? It's her problem? [19:37.89]I drank milk that tasted funny. 不是我做错什么了? 是她的问题? [19:40.86]我喝了杯牛奶 味道真好玩儿 [19:44.65]Penny thinks I'm too smart for her. That's ridiculous. [19:48.08]I know. Penny觉得我太聪明 这也太搞笑了 [19:50.70]Most of your work is extremely derivative. 我明白 [19:54.36]And don't worry,that's not a secret. 你的大部分工作 都不是原创的 [19:57.29]Everybody knows. 别担心 这就不是秘密了 [20:00.26]谁都知道 [20:05.06]Listen,I know what's been bothering you about us,and I have the answer. [20:08.75]What are you talking about? 听着 我已经知道我们之间的问题了 我也有了解决方案 [20:09.70]Okay,first,I want to say that it's not Sheldon's fault. [20:12.41]He tried very hard to keep your secret. 你在说什么? [20:14.37]If Howard hadn't drugged him,he would've taken it to his grave. 好的 首先 这不是Sheldon的错 [20:16.38]他已经很努力地替你保密了 [20:18.32]He told you? 要不是Howard给他灌了安眠药 他是不会自掘坟墓的 [20:19.37]Yes,but it's okay. [20:20.94]Now that we know what the problem is there's a simple solution. 他告诉你了? [20:23.34]是的 不过这没关系 [20:24.99]Pasadena City College? 既然我们都知道问题何在 要解决岂不是很容易 [20:27.39]A place for fun,a place for knowledge. [20:28.96]帕萨迪纳城市学院? (托福分数线最低的学校之一) [20:31.36]"给你知识 给你乐趣" [20:33.54]See,this man here is playing hackey-sack, and this girl's gonna be a paralegal. [20:37.51]看见没? 这男的在玩沙包球 那女的会成为律师助手 [20:39.10]Oh,I get it. [20:40.40]Because Dr. Leonard Hofstadter can't date a girl without a fancy college degree. [20:43.07]噢 我明白了 [20:45.63]Well,it's really not that fancy. Leonard Hofstadter博士没法和一个 没有名牌大学文凭的女孩子谈恋爱 [20:47.26]It's just a city college. [20:49.92]Right,but I have to have some sort of degree to date you? 嗯... 其实这也不是个名校 [20:52.65]That doesn't matter to me at all. 只是城市学院而已 [20:54.39]So it's fine with you if I'm not smart. 没错 不过要和你约会 总得有个学位什么的是吧? [20:57.07]Absolutely. 这对我而言一点都不重要 [20:58.36]所以如果我不聪明也没关系 [21:01.04]绝对没关系 [21:03.67]Okay,this time,I know where I went wrong. [21:07.64]好吧 这次我知道我错在哪儿了 [21:09.19]Bite me! [21:12.66]你能拿我怎么样啊?!

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