他其实没那么喜欢你 第42期:背叛还羞辱女朋友

So, if he had his way, this lovely month ofdishonesty would have turned into two months,three months...forever.

因此，如果按照他的做法，这种可爱的不忠将会持续2个月，3个月......或是永远。

Do all his apologies count for something?

他所有的道歉有什么价值呢?

Well, you can choose to believe he is sorry.

你可以选择相信他很抱歉。

You can choose to believe he will change.

你可以选择相信他会改变。

But in my book, lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who'sreally into you.

但是在我的书中，撒谎，出轨，隐藏正是真正喜欢你的人决计不会有的行为。

Sad and disappointed, Greg

难过而又失望的格雷格

The "He Has a Stronger Sex Drive Than I" Excuse

“他比我性欲强烈”的借口

Dear Greg, I have been dating a guy for a year.

亲爱的格雷格，我和一个男人约会一年了。

I found out through a friend that he has beensleeping with someone I sort of know.

我从一个朋友处得知他跟一个我貌似认识的人睡了。

I confronted him, and he told me that I don't givehim enough sex and that's why he's been sleepingaround.

我跟他对质，他说我没能满足他的性欲，所以他出轨。

He's right. Sometimes I don't want to have sex when he wants to.

他是对的。有时他想做爱，但是我不想。

It's not all the time, but he definitely does want sex more often than I do.

不是一直都这样，但是他确实比我性欲更强烈。

So, in a way, he's right. Should I just forgive him and try to put out more?

所以，这方面来说他是对的。我应该原谅他然后加把劲么?

Signed Lorraine

洛伦

Dear Putting Out, The only thing you should be putting out is any of his clothes that are still inyour house.

亲爱的加把劲，唯一应该扔出去的是他所有在你家的衣服。

There is no excuse for him sleeping around. (Period! )

他的出轨没有任何借口可言。(句号!)

There are so many ways to deal with the truly common problem of differing sex drives within arelationship.

恋爱中不同的性欲是真实普遍的问题，有很多途径来解决。

Usually one would start with an adult conversation wherein a discussion ensues that hopefullyresolves with the two parties agreeing to work on it—not him jumping in the sack with someoneyou know!

通常人们以成人间的对话开始，其中接着通过双方都有意愿同意解决这个问题——而不是他跟一个你认识的人上床!

Not only does he not respect you or the relationship, he doesn't respect himself enough to be ina meaningful relationship.

他不仅不尊重你和这段恋情，而且在这段有意义的感情中对自己也不够尊重。

This isn't even a question of "he's just not that into you."

这甚至不是一个“他并没那么喜欢你”的问题。

In this situation, if you like yourself at all, you should definitely not be into him.

在这种情况下，如果你真的爱惜自己的话，你决计不该喜欢他。

Shouting from a closed room, Greg

在附近房间咆哮的格雷格

These last two guys are good. They've betrayed their relationships and humiliated theirgirlfriends.

最后两位哥们儿真行。他们背叛了自己的爱情，还羞辱了他们的女朋友。

Then they tell them that it's their fault, knowing that they have just done something that hasso demoralized them that they will be their most inclined to believe a load of horse crap.

然后他们告诉女友是对方的错，要知道他们做了些让他们感觉沮丧的事，以至于他们更倾向于相信一堆马粪。

If something is wrong in a relationship, here's a bright, mature idea: talk about it.

如果感情出现了问题，明智成熟的做法就是：谈谈。

Don't let any man blame you for their infidelity. Ever.

不要让任何男人把自己的不忠归咎于你，永远都不要。

The "But at Least He Knew Her" Excuse

“至少他知道她”的借口

Dear Greg, I've been going out with a guy for about a year.

亲爱的格雷格，我跟一个男人约会快一年了。

We are in love and get along great.

我们相爱并且处的不错。

Recently he met with his ex-wife who he hasn't seen in about a year. (She had left him becauseshe met someone else. )

最近他遇见了他快一年没见的前妻。(她因为别人离开了他。)

They have been divorced about two years. They slept together.

他们离婚快两年了，他们睡了。

I am very upset and want to break up with him.

我很生气，想跟他分手。

He wants me to forgive him because it wasn't like it was someone new; it was his ex-wife.

他想让我原谅他，因为毕竟不是其他陌生人，是他妻子。

Cheating is bad. Not knowing why you cheated is even worse.

出轨很糟糕。不知道你为何出轨更糟糕。

If one red flag isn't enough for you, how about two?

如果一面红旗不够的话，那两面红旗怎么样?

Don't date any man who doesn't know why he does things.

不要跟连自己为什么这么做都不清楚的人交往。

The "But I've Gotten Fat" Excuse

“我长胖了”的借口

Dear Greg, I had been dating a guy for about two years, and I thought things were going reallywell.

亲爱的格雷格，我和一个人在一起两年了，我觉得事情进展的很顺利。

After he came home from a family visit, he told me he slept with someone he met at a bar.

直到他探亲回来告诉我说他跟一个在酒吧遇见的人睡了。

I was devastated and asked him why he did it.

我很绝望，问他为何如此。

He told me I had put on some weight and therefore he wasn't that attracted to me anymore.

他说我增肥了，而且我对他不再那么有吸引力了。

I'm confused. He's right. I have put on about twenty pounds.

我很困惑，他是对的，我增肥了20磅。

Should I break up with him or start going to the gym?

我应该跟他分手还是开始去体育馆好呢?

Signed Beth

贝丝

Dear Twenty Pounds,

亲爱的20磅，

I definitely think you should lose 175 pounds—in the form of your loser boyfriend—not thetwenty that you're talking about.

我觉得你应该减去175磅——以你失败者男友的形式——而不是你说的那20磅。

He just cheated on you and called you fat.

他背着你偷吃，还说你胖。

How many low- self-esteem protein shakes can one person drink?

一个人可以喝多少低自尊蛋白奶昔?

Using your weight as an excuse for his cheating is not only mean, but simply not valid.

用自己体重的借口去解释他的出轨不仅卑劣，而且没有依据。

If he has a problem with anything in your relationship, he's supposed to talk to you about it,not put-his-penis-in-a-strange-vagina about it.

如果他跟你的恋情中出现了问题，他应该跟你谈谈，而不是把自己的jb插到陌生人的阴道里。

And by the way, how's he going to react if you ever get pregnant or grow older and get a fewwrinkles? Or wear a color he doesn't like?

顺便一说，等你怀孕，变老，长皱纹的时候他会如何表现?穿他不喜欢的颜色的衣服呢?

Get rid of this loser or I'm going to come to your house and get rid of him for you.

离开这个笨蛋，否则我会去你家里帮你摆脱他。