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听美剧学英语-摩登家庭第三季 第9集:感恩节的pk

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2018年08月28日

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00:03.06, Oh, my goodness, those hands are cold. 天啊 那双手冰凉刺骨啊
00:06.40, At least, buy me dinner first. 至少让我做个饱死鬼啊
00:10.25, Tell my wife and kids I love them. 告诉我的妻子孩子我爱它们
00:13.22, Oh, my god. 天啊
00:14.66, That's kind of dark, mom. 你瞬间把故事变黑暗了 妈
00:16.68, What 什么啊
00:17.82, Wait, what's my favourite hospital food? 等等 我最爱的医院食物是什么
00:20.20, Jell-o! 哈露[哈啰+吉露果冻
00:22.46, Hi, buddy. 好啊 哥们儿
00:23.50, No, today is still good. 不 今天可以的
00:24.57, Good for what? Who's buddy? 可以干什么 哪个哥们儿
00:25.82, Yeah, just head over on to the house. 好啊 直接来屋子里见面吧
00:27.64, Whose house? Who's buddy? 谁家屋子 哥们儿又是谁
00:29.05, OK, see you in a couple. 行 一会儿见
00:30.47, Couple of what? Who's buddy? 一对什么 哥们儿是谁
00:31.94, Kenneth. 肯尼斯
00:32.70, - Kenneth? - Kenneth! 肯尼斯-肯尼斯
00:34.99, If I had a son, I'd want him to be like Kenneth Ploufe. 如果我有儿子 我希望他能和肯尼斯·普洛弗一样
00:37.26, You do have a son. 你确实是有儿子的
00:38.03, When we first moved in here, 我们刚搬来这里时
00:38.95, He was the sweet kid who lived next door. 他还是个可爱的小孩 住在我们隔壁
00:40.62, Mm, the weird kid who lived next door, 是住在我们隔壁的古怪小孩吧
00:41.68, But Phil always had a soft spot for him 但菲尔对他很亲
00:43.66, Because Kenneth sort of looked up to him. 因为肯尼斯有点敬仰他
00:45.23, I wouldn't say hero. 我都不想说他视我如英雄
00:46.81, And yet you did. 但你还是说了
00:47.80, Well, you weren't going to. 因为你不打算说啊
00:50.16, Claire's always had some issues with Kenneth. 克莱尔对肯尼斯有些成见
00:52.21, He would stare at me a little too long. 他老是色迷迷地盯着我看
00:54.86, Can you blame him? 那能怪他吗
00:56.88, You used to dress sexy back then. 因为你当年穿得太性感了
01:07.50, Ten years. Can you believe it? 一晃十年过去了 难以置信啊
01:10.43, I feel like we ended that last hug too soon. 我觉得刚刚的拥抱过于仓促
01:12.21, I-- come on again! 再来一个吧
01:14.88, Oh, wow, that's a lot of hugging. 哦 抱的多了点吧
01:16.51, Oh! She's right. Why hug when you can... 她说得对 为什么要拥抱 明明可以直接...
01:19.22, Man-shake.-Man-shake. 爷们握手-爷们握手
01:25.63, I'm gonna get the coffee. 我去弄咖啡
01:28.18, Man-shake. 爷们握手
01:29.87, Are we sure? 没搞错吧
01:33.52, Roll up the curtain. 拉起"门帘"
01:50.25, I don't know what's worse-- 我都不知道哪样才更糟
01:51.12, That he competes every Thanksgiving in a pie-eating contest, 是他每年感恩节都会参加吃派比赛
01:54.13, or that he's 9-time runner-up. 还是他已经9次屈居第二了
01:56.39, It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without the contest. 没有比赛 就不是感恩节了
01:58.39, Yes, it would. 当然也是啊
02:00.17, I think I have to tell my pumpkin chunkin story. 我好想说说我的射南瓜故事
02:01.96, Oh, no, no, you don't have to. 不不不 你不需要说的
02:03.30, No, I kind of think I have to. 不 我觉得我必须说
02:05.66, Once, Cam and his friends 有次 小卡和他的朋友们
02:06.64, tried to slingshot a pumpkin across a football field. 试着将南瓜从足球场的一端射到另一端的
02:10.60, Three seconds. 3秒钟
02:11.23, That's all he needs to tell that story. 3秒种就可以讲完那个故事
02:12.65, So the fog was rolling in over the mountains 山间大雾弥漫
02:15.02, Like an ominous blanket 像是覆盖了一条不祥的毯子
02:16.66, As we readied the giant slingshot. 正当我们准备好弹弓时
02:18.95, You know, Lorna, the pastor's daughter, 牧师的女儿 洛娜
02:20.46, She was nervous because like I said, it was after curfew. 她很紧张 因为当时已经是宵禁后了
02:23.64, She was a goody two-shoe. 她是个"冒牌天使"
02:25.02, Only pastor's daughter I ever met that was. 我遇见的牧师女儿里就她是那样的
02:31.44, So we finally launch the pumpkin, 最终我们将南瓜发射出去
02:32.93, And it sails through the air, goalpost to goalpost... 南瓜在空中飞过 穿越一个个门柱
02:36.28, Past the end zone, into the parking lot, 穿过球门区 直飞停车场
02:39.02, Through the open roof of Lorna's dad's car. 又穿过洛娜父亲车子的露顶
02:41.59, I turn to Cody and I say, 我转身对科迪说
02:43.73, Now what are the chances of that landing there? 射到那里的几率有多大
02:46.63, He says, "Where?" 他说 哪里
02:48.06, And I say... 然后我说
02:50.12, The sunroof of a preacher man. 牧师的汽车天窗
02:54.59, Wah-wah 哇哇
03:02.28, Okay, come on in! 好了 进来吧
03:04.63, Voila! 瞧啊
03:06.42, Ah! Okay, what are we looking at? 好吧 眼前是什么玩意儿呢
03:07.41, My centerpiece for Thanksgiving. 我为感恩节制作的餐桌中央的摆饰
03:09.18, It is wonderful. You're so talented. 真是太棒了 你真有才
03:11.43, I can't believe that you did this. 我真不敢相信你做了这个
03:13.30, Yeah, my juices were really flowing on this one. 是吧 我自己欣赏的时候 也口水直流
03:15.86, I actually shot a making-of video. 我还拍了制作过程的视频
03:17.60, Hey, maybe we can watch it later at the party. 我们可以在派对结束后观看
03:19.52, Well, yeah, that or football. 或者看橄榄球赛吧
03:22.43, Mi amor, I'm so proud of you. 小宝贝 我真为你骄傲
03:24.72, Is there nothing in the world that you can't do? 世界上还有什么是你做不到的吗
03:27.72, Centerpieces, for starters. 餐桌中央摆饰 就算第一件了
03:29.55, Why do you say everything of his is great, 你为什么说他做的一切都很棒
03:31.29, Even if it isn't? 即便实际上很烂
03:32.11, Because I'm building him up. 因为我在给他树立信心
03:34.39, That's what parents do. 那是父母的任务之一
03:35.53, Too much, if you ask me. 要我说的话 你做的太过了
03:36.64, Kids cross the street nowadays, they get a ribbon. 现在的孩子会过马路 就能得到朵小红花
03:38.68, Manny's got plenty of confidence. 曼尼已经自信心爆棚了
03:40.05, He just needs a little reality check every now and then. 他需要的是对现实的偶尔清醒认识
03:42.85, And this thing is a horn of ugly. 这玩意儿简直丑伤了
03:45.01, Shh!
03:46.02, My mother used to criticize everything I did. 我妈妈以前总是批评我所做的一切
03:48.81, And look at me now. 瞧瞧现在的我
03:50.34, I am a jumble of insecurities. 就是个缺乏安全感的可怜虫
03:52.66, I'm not getting that. 我没觉得啊
03:53.68, Do not say a word to Manny. 绝对不许打击曼尼
03:55.87, Fine. But trust me, 好吧 不过相信我
03:57.80, If you told him the truth, he'd thank you later. 如果你告诉他实情 他以后会感激你的
04:01.07, Mm. Like Claire and Mitch? Did they thank you? 像克莱尔和米奇一样吗 他们感谢过你吗
04:03.58, Not yet. 暂时还没
04:05.20, But it's coming. 但很快就会的
04:10.41, Ah! So many memories in this place. Yeah. 这里充满了我的回忆啊
04:12.65, Do you guys still have, like, every cereal? 你们依然 每次吃麦片的时候都那个吗
04:14.20, We have a lot. 必须的
04:15.06, Yeah! Of course you do. Of course you do. 当然当然 那是肯定的啦
04:17.07, You only have the greatest dad in the world. 你们有世上最了不起的老爸
04:19.46, So what have you been up to? 你近些年在忙些什么啊
04:20.24, I haven't seen you since you went off to college. 你上大学后 我就没见过你了
04:21.88, Oh, you know, actually, that didn't work out so well. 事实上 我是被大学上了
04:24.03, I bounced around for a while. 我四处混了一段时间
04:25.49, Ended up washing dishes in New Mexico. 最后在新墨西哥州洗起了盘子
04:27.96, So without the benefit of a college degree, 看来没有大学文凭
04:30.32, I guess your options were kind of limited, huh? 可以选择的职业很有限啊
04:32.75, Ease up. It's a holiday. 别谈学习 今天过节呢
04:34.09, Yeah, it was--it was tough. Oh, no. no, thank you. 是啊 是很艰难 不 不 谢谢
04:36.33, - Thank you, though, sweetie. You're so sweet. - Oh. Okay. -谢谢你 甜心 你真好 -好吧
04:38.15, It was tough for a while... 一开始挺艰难的
04:39.08, But then a roommate and I started our own business. 后来我跟我室友自己创业了
04:41.53, Oh, was that also in the dish or cleaning industry? 也是餐饮业或清洁行业的吗
04:44.31, No. No, no, no. 不不
04:45.47, It was actually a small investment company. 其实是个小投资公司
04:47.09, Well, small at first. 最初规模很小
04:48.64, You know, we rode the tech wave for a while, 当了一阵科技的弄潮儿
04:50.72, then expanded into video games, 然后扩张到电子游戏
04:52.32, amusement parks, sports arenas. 游乐场 运动场什么的
04:54.45, Anything that seemed awesome, really. 什么牛逼就投资什么
04:56.43, I'm actually in town to buy a blimp. 我此次回乡是来买小飞艇的
04:58.10, Holy crow. 苍天大地啊
05:00.88, So if you--if you'd gone to college, 所以如果当初你上了大学
05:02.87, you would have done all that just four years later, 可能要4年之后才会做那些事
05:05.19, or--or never. 或者根本不会
05:06.68, Alex really needs to be picked up, 得有人去接艾丽克斯了
05:08.39, Sweetie. Why don't you go get her? 甜心 你去接下她吧
05:09.94, I wanna hear more of what he has to say about 我还想听听他的创业史呢
05:11.74, We're leaving. 快走吧
05:12.70, Kenneth, I am so proud of you. 肯尼斯 我太为你骄傲了
05:15.61, You really made it. 你真的很成功
05:17.02, Well, I did get one pretty lucky break. 确实 我运气好
05:20.19, Early on, I met a very special guy 早些年 我认识了个贵人
05:23.00, who taught me that what I thought and said had value. 他让我意识到我的所思所言都是有价值的
05:26.68, Oh, you mean like-- 你是说...
05:27.58, Shh. Luke. Let the man talk. 卢克 听他说
05:29.69, He encouraged me to always find the fun 他鼓励我干什么都得找到乐趣
05:32.02, and follow this thing. 并且永远跟着这里走
05:33.68, - Your lung? - No, my heart. 你的肺吗-不 我的心
05:35.58, To this day, at every crossroad, 直到今天 每做一个决定前
05:37.39, I ask myself one question-- 我都会问自己
05:40.02, What would Phil Dunphy do? 菲尔·邓菲会怎么做
05:41.50, Record scratch! 至理名言啊
05:44.00, Oh, that's me buzzin'. 来电话了
05:45.76, Oh, it's Paris. 是帕丽斯打来的
05:47.71, She's my assistant in Tokyo. 她是我在东京的助理
05:49.87, You'd think they'd know how to demo 4-d gaming graphics without my help 他们没我连个4D游戏图都展示不了
05:53.54, They don't. Hey, luke, 完全搞不定 嘿 卢克
05:55.08, what instrument does Yo-Yo Ma play? 马友友拉什么乐器来着
05:57.32, Um... cello? 琴讲
05:59.52, He's me... 他就是翻版的我
06:01.19, And he's spectacular. 但却是豪华升级版的
06:04.56, Oh, my god. 天啊
06:05.77, Kenneth Ploufe is part owner of a resort in the Bahamas, 肯尼斯·普洛弗与人共有在巴哈马的度假村
06:09.18, some cruise line, 某条游轮巡航线
06:11.19, And Lacy Fair, that lingerie company. 以及"蕾丝娇女" 那家内衣公司
06:13.57, Oh! Ew! I'm wearing one of his bras! 恶心 我正穿着他家的胸罩呢
06:15.95, Look, he's got a model in his lap. 看这个 模特坐他腿上合照呢
06:17.62, - No way. - Look at her. 不是吧-看看她
06:25.17, This is your fault! 都是你的错
06:33.22, Are you seriously gonna stay in here all day? 你真想一天都躲在房间不出去吗
06:35.24, I can't face mom. 我无法面对妈妈
06:36.51, If I see her, I'm gonna have to confess. 我一看见她 就会忍不住坦白从宽的
06:38.37, Take a breather. It's just a dent. 淡定 不过就是有点小凹
06:41.17, And saying nothing is not lying, okay? 沉默不是撒谎 好吗
06:44.10, It's just letting the truth speak for itself. 只是让真相自己大白而已
06:46.55, This is not the time for moral equivocation. 现在不是模糊道义责任的时候
06:48.87, Okay, I don't know what that means, 我不知道那是什么意思
06:50.21, and also, don't tell me. 也不想知道
06:52.08, You're the one who's gonna lose her driving privileges. 你才是那个以后不能碰车的人
06:53.76, I don't know why you're so calm. 你怎么能这么冷静
06:55.31, All we have to do is keep it from mom 我们只要暂时瞒住妈妈
06:57.35, until she goes to the store. 一直瞒到她去商店就行了
06:58.85, Then, when she sees it, she'll assume that it happened there, 然后 她发现了的话 也会觉得是在商店撞的
07:02.17, which it did, so it's not really lying. 本来也就确实是 所以根本不算撒谎
07:05.36, Listen to you. 听听 你说谎都不打草稿
07:07.11, Are you gonna be a career criminal? 你是想成为职业罪犯吗
07:08.80, Ugh. You sound like mom. 你跟妈妈简直一模一样
07:09.94, I don't know what I'm gonna do after high school. 我高中毕业后可怎么办啊
07:13.66, It was a supportive "Wah-wah." 我那声"哇哇"是表达对你的支持
07:15.45, I was trying to save the moment. 不让你冷场
07:16.42, There's no such thing as a supportive "Wah-wah." 哇哇那种声音怎么可能表示支持
07:18.69, A "Wah-wah" By its very nature is vicious and undercutting. 那个声调就是讽刺和侮辱的代名词
07:20.96, Well, I was just trying to salvage that story, okay? 我只是为了替你的故事打圆场
07:22.95, I told you not to tell it, 我叫你别说
07:24.13, You told it, and it died. 你还是说了 结果场子砸了
07:25.64, It did not die. It's a thinker. 没砸 只是他们没反应过来
07:27.27, Cam, the only thing people were thinking was, 小卡 他们在想的唯一一件事就是
07:28.39, Thank god this story's over. 谢天谢地他总算说完了
07:30.50, Okay. I get it. 好吧 我明白了
07:31.40, So how long have I been embarrassing you with my stories? 我的故事让你觉得丢人有多久了
07:33.62, No, no, no, no. You don't embarrass me. 不不 你没有丢我的人
07:35.32, I love your stories, okay? 我爱你的故事
07:37.09, The tractor in the swimming hole? 水塘里的拖拉机
07:38.73, Aunt Betty's wiglet on the piglet? 把贝蒂婶的假发戴到猪崽头上
07:41.01, Uncle Carl said she couldn't tell 'em apart. 卡尔叔说她分不清那些小猪崽
07:42.87, See? Those are funny. You have so many great ones. 是吧 好好笑啊 多么五彩斑斓的童年趣事啊
07:45.72, Well, that's farm life. 农场生活就是如此
07:46.63, Rain or shine, there's always a bumper crop of stories. 无论下雨或天晴 精彩故事永不停
07:48.65, Yeah, I'm just saying maybe 是啊 我的意思是
07:49.66, you take punkin chunkin out of the rotation. 你该让那个射南瓜的故事退居二线了
07:52.03, I guess you're right. Maybe I could just-- 你说得也有理 或许我可以...
07:53.31, Yeah, stick to the ones that really happened, 是啊 就讲那些真实发生过的事
07:54.55, because people love those. 人们都喜欢真实的故事
07:56.67, Excuse me. What? 不好意思 你说什么
07:58.14, I'm--I'm just saying people laugh more at stories that are true. 我的意思是 真事才更有笑点
08:00.75, Punkin chunkin is a true story. 射南瓜是真人真事
08:02.50, True-ish? 有点真实?
08:03.70, No. True. 不 完全真实
08:05.83, Really? 是吗
08:07.37, The length of a football field, 橄榄球场那么大
08:08.81, Through the sunroof of a car that was open in late November in Missouri? 11月底的密苏里 车的天窗还是开着的?
08:13.21, It was unseasonably warm. 那年秋老虎很猖狂
08:14.62, That explains the fog rolling over the hill. 所以山间雾气弥漫?
08:16.55, And who's Cody-- 还有科迪是谁
08:17.95, Who you're close enough to chunk with 你可以熟到跟他一起射南瓜
08:19.51, but mysteriously only appears in this story? 但除此之外却从来没提起过他
08:21.84, Cody was K.I.A. In desert storm. 科迪在沙漠风暴行动中不幸阵亡
08:23.55, He's a hero. 他是个英雄
08:27.80, You know, all this from someone 你根本没资格质疑
08:29.10, who's never even chunked a punkin. 因为你从来没有发射过南瓜
08:32.62, Well, I've never lunked a tunkin, either. 我可没丢人丢到家呢
08:34.04, You know, these aren't real things. 因为 那些都不是真事
08:37.00, This'll work, right? 这样可以吧
08:38.34, Totally, dad. 绝对行 老爸
08:39.29, Why have one long table 干嘛要用一张长桌呢
08:40.39, when you can use four little ones bistro style? 明明可以用4个酒馆小餐桌
08:43.52, I'll bet this is how the French do Thanksgiving. 法国人肯定就是这么过感恩节的
08:45.86, You don't mind sitting with your Uncle Mitch 你不介意跟你米奇舅舅
08:47.16, And, uh, grandpa, do you? 还有外公一起坐吧
08:48.63, Anything's better than watching Lily chew. 只要不用看莉莉吧唧嘴 坐哪儿都行
08:51.19, By the way, 顺便一提
08:52.18, this is the side of your old man that Kenneth was talking about. 这就是肯尼斯所说的你老爹的另一面
08:55.33, Original. 创意十足
08:57.02, Imaginative. 天马行空
09:00.93, Fearless. 无所畏惧
09:03.52, So Kenneth became a gajillionaire 肯尼斯成为亿万富翁是因为他
09:05.57, by asking himself, "What would Phil do?" 常常扪心自问 如果是菲尔会怎么做吗
09:08.43, He sure did. 是的没错
09:11.11, Where did that come from? Right? 真是神来之笔啊 对吧
09:13.69, But you're you. 可你是原版的菲尔
09:15.73, Why aren't we gojillionaires? 我们怎么没变亿万富翁
09:17.46, Why don't you do what Phil would do? 为什么你不按照菲尔的想法去做呢
09:20.18, Phil, why didn't you just put the extra leaves in the table? 菲尔 干嘛不把桌子都拼起来
09:24.26, Trying to have some fun, be creative. 我想试着来点好玩的 搞点创意
09:26.59, One long table, honey. 拼成一长桌子吧 亲爱的
09:28.23, If it was good enough for the last supper, 耶稣最后的晚餐用的就是长桌
09:29.93, it's good enough for us. 我们也该效仿
09:35.24, I'm having second thoughts about this centerpiece. 关于我做的餐桌摆饰 我有点犹豫了
09:37.53, - Ay, no. - Hear him out. 别想了-听他说下去
09:39.31, I just think if we bring it to Phil and Claire's, 要是我们带它去菲尔和克莱尔家
09:40.97, we'll never see it again, right? 就再也见不到它了是吧
09:42.38, That's the plan. 是的
09:43.32, Well, that would be sad. 那真让人伤心
09:45.49, Except maybe my sadness will inspire me 不过这份伤感或许能激发我
09:47.31, to create something even greater. 创造出更棒的作品
09:49.38, Remember that collage I made 记得我做的那副拼贴画吗
09:50.43, that helped us get through Katrina? 是它支撑我们度过了卡特里娜飓风危机
09:52.46, You did this. You know that. 都是你造成的 你明白吧
09:53.80, So... 难道
09:54.58, is this the legendary rice pilaf we've been hearing about? 那就是江湖上闻名已久的手抓饭吗
09:57.67, Try for yourself. 你自己尝尝
09:58.83, Used to make it every year, 以前我每年都做这个
09:59.62, but it, uh, started to upstage the turkey. 但后来它开始抢走了烤火鸡的风头
10:03.80, - Something wrong? - Not so much wrong as missing. 不好吃吗-不至于到难吃
10:07.57, It--it just tastes a little flat. 只是略显平淡无味
10:09.26, That a fact? 是吗
10:10.55, I just think with the earthiness of the rice, 我只是觉得可以加些辛香料
10:12.11, you might want something zesty to set it off. 来盖过米饭的土腥味
10:14.43, I think this might be a job for cumin. 估计加点孜然能管用
10:16.18, You know, since we're sharing 既然我们在相互交流
10:17.10, - helpful criticisms-- - no, no, no, no. 批评指正-停停停
10:18.24, nobody's sharing anything. Manny, go change for the party. 谁都别再说了 曼尼 去换衣服
10:21.07, No, no, no, but I appreciate helpful criticisms. 可是我愿意听取善意的批评
10:23.13, It, uh, it's important for me that I hear the truth. 我觉得知道真相十分重要
10:26.27, Makes me stronger, 能令我更坚强
10:27.77, less of a mama's boy. 而不只是个离不开妈的孩子
10:29.85, Yeah, mom, he can take it. 没错 妈 他承受得了
10:31.08, That's what he says, 他嘴巴上这么说
10:32.10, but you don't really know what he feels underneath. 可你不知道他内心实际的感受
10:35.91, Some people are so sensitive, 有些人太过敏感
10:37.79, that they hear one criticism, 一句批评
10:39.80, and it kills the spark that made them special. 就能毁掉他们的才华
10:43.59, I think I know what's going on here. 我明白是怎么回事了
10:45.16, Good. 太好了
10:45.97, This is about you and your mom, isn't it? 是有关你和你妈之间的纠葛 对吧
10:48.14, Yes, it is. 对 没错
10:48.85, No, it isn't. 不 不是的
10:49.54, Yes, it is! 就是那样
10:51.27, Manny, don't upset me anymore. 曼尼 别再让我心烦了
10:52.79, Go. Go change. 去 换衣服去吧
10:55.26, What--what should I wear? 我该穿什么啊
10:56.37, Ay, you look good in everything! 你穿啥都好看
11:03.92, Where you going, mom? 你去哪儿啊 妈妈
11:05.00, Mm, I gotta run to the store. 得去趟商店
11:06.99, Someone ate all the marshmallows. 有人把棉花糖都吃完了
11:09.06, Hey, can I tell you something? 能跟你商量点事吗
11:11.09, I was thinking that maybe after new year's break, 我在考虑寒假以后
11:13.86, we could visit a couple more colleges. 我们可以去其他的大学看一看
11:15.30, Seriously?-I was so hard on you before. 你说真的吗-我之前对你太凶了
11:18.20, I'm sorry. I know I'm no Kenneth. 抱歉 我明白我做不到肯尼斯那样
11:19.94, I'm gonna need all the help that I can get. 我得尽量取得别人的帮助
11:22.01, Honey, I am so proud of you. Oh. 亲爱的 我为你骄傲
11:25.31, Oh, thank you. 谢了
11:28.12, What's this? 什么呀
11:29.31, - Oh, okay. - What are you doing? 好吧-怎么了
11:30.75, Oh, uncle Mitch is picking up the marshmallows. 米奇舅舅已经在买棉花糖了
11:32.08, Then again, backpacking through Europe 话说回来 去欧洲背包游
11:33.28, could be educational in its own way. 也有其独特的教育意义吧
11:34.89, No! No, no! No, no, no! 别 别 别
11:36.59, Do you know what's illegal in Europe? 你知道在欧洲什么算违法吗
11:38.47, Nothing! 啥都不违法
11:39.41, You are going to college! 你上大学上定了
11:41.03, Okay, fine. 好吧 随你
11:42.43, Darn right it's fine. 当然是听我的
11:45.73, Piece of cake. 小菜一碟
11:48.94, My hair's coming out! 我头发都要吓掉了
11:52.38, Wow, honey. I-I think you could make these simpler. 亲爱的 我以为你会布置得简单点
11:54.96, Just, you know, sort of do 'em flat and on the side. 将一边平铺开就可以了
11:57.58, Hmm. Yeah. Seems like that's how you like me. 就像你希望我成为的那样
11:59.80, Flat and on the side. 平平淡淡 甘居下游
12:01.45, You know what? Sometimes I need to be puffed up and frilly. 有时我也需要膨胀一下 摆摆架子
12:04.15, All right, is this one of 要是以后人家问起
12:05.10, those moments I'm gonna have to remember later 咱俩婚姻破裂前的征兆之一
12:06.19, when they ask me if there were any signs? 我是否就该想到此时此刻呀
12:08.36, This is what Phil would do-- 这就是菲尔会做的事
12:09.83, Make fantastic napkin origami 把餐巾折得有模有样
12:11.53, that startles and delights his guests. 令客人们又惊又喜
12:13.58, I know, but, sweetie, 我知道 可亲爱的
12:14.64, they're just looking a little... 它们看起来有点...
12:17.15, Claire, you always do this. You squelch me. 克莱尔 你总是这样 你总打击我
12:20.05, You squelch me right when I'm about to soar. 每当我要展翅高飞时 你就打击我
12:22.42, Honey, you're folding napkins. 亲爱的 你只是折个餐巾而已
12:24.02, You're folding my dreams! 你在屈折我的梦想
12:26.30, You know what Kenneth told me? 你知道肯尼斯说了什么吗
12:27.91, The secret to his success-- 他事业成功的奥秘
12:29.53, his whole career, he's tried to emulate me. 是因为他试着模仿我
12:32.41, The only difference is, 唯一不同的是
12:33.38, he hasn't had someone constantly telling him what not to do. 没有人不停地要他别干这个 别干那个
12:36.62, So the only reason we don't have a-a blimp tethered to our mailbox 你意思是说我们家买不起小飞艇的唯一原因
12:40.16, is because I'm always shooting down your great ideas? 是因为我总是打击你的"奇思妙想"
12:43.19, Yeah. 没错
12:44.39, Let's review the squelch pile, Phil. 咱们回顾一下"打击史" 菲尔
12:46.33, Let's see-- the rice pudding franchise. 比如 米布丁的特许经销权
12:48.79, Works for all chewing abilities. 无齿之徒 也可享受
12:50.16, Adult tricycles. 成人三轮车
12:51.56, Just try to fall off. 有种你就摔摔看
12:52.63, The Aspirin gun. 阿司匹林喷射枪
12:53.80, Some people have a hard time swallowing! 有人就是吞药困难嘛
12:56.36, And you left one out. Hmm. 你还忘说了一个
12:57.80, And that, my dear Claire, is a real head-scratcher-- 亲爱的克莱尔 那才是挠破头皮才能想到的
13:00.62, Tm. 不求人
13:03.38, Action. 开演
13:07.04, Hey, friend. 朋友好啊
13:08.68, You look like you had a rough day at the office. 看上去你今天上班累惨了吧
13:11.02, The stress from my job at the robot assassin factory... 在"机器人暗杀工厂"的工作压力真是...
13:14.78, Is too much to take. 生命中不能承受之重
13:16.86, Aw, shoot me an aspirin, pal. 给我来一枪阿司匹林吧 亲
13:19.33, Maybe someday. 日后再议
13:20.83, But until then, try this on for size. 不过先来试试这个合不合适
13:24.27, The real head-scratcher features 32 patent-pending "Nogginizers" 即将拥有32项专利的脑神经导体按摩仪
13:27.36, That gently massage your scalp 轻柔按摩您的头部
13:28.94, In a soothing purr of motorized delight. 在安宁的声音中给您以享受
13:33.44, Ahh. It feels great, 哇塞 真舒服
13:35.08, And it looks good, too. 外形也很帅气哦
13:37.34, It's a real lifesaver. 真是居家旅行必备良器
13:38.98, You mean a real head-scratcher? 您是说真正的头部按摩仪吧
13:44.83, Tm. 不求人
13:46.65, I love you, Phil, 我爱你 菲尔
13:48.36, - But you-- - Stop. 但是呢-别说了
13:49.74, I love your "I love you." 我就爱听你说爱我
13:51.39, I'm getting awful tired of your "But." 但我就怕温柔背后的一刀
13:53.76, I heard it. 我经历过的
14:11.47, Welcome, welcome, welcome! 欢迎欢迎 热烈欢迎
14:12.91, Happy turkey day! 欢度火鸡节哦
14:14.50, Hey, is that a new car? 哇 你们买了辆新车啊
14:15.69, Yep! It's the best, isn't it? 没错 是不是特棒
14:17.17, I can't take my eyes off it. 我的目光简直被钉在上面了
14:18.97, You shouldn't, either. 您也别往别处看了
14:20.94, Are you okay, mami? 你还好吧 闺女
14:22.11, I'm... I'm... 我 我
14:23.59, Hey, guys! Now the party's started. Come on! 大家好啊 派对开始了 快进去吧
14:27.04, - How are you? - Good. 最近好吗-很好
14:28.21, You disgust me. 恶心死姐了
14:29.39, Are you hungry? 饿坏了吧
14:30.85, Oh, good. It's still in one piece. 还好没散架
14:32.55, You hit those potholes pretty hard. 你都快把我建的洞穴弄塌方了
14:34.40, It's like you didn't see 'em. 你难道没看见吗
14:35.34, No, I saw 'em. 不 我看见了
14:37.09, Can I be honest with you, Jay? 我能跟你说句实话吗 杰
14:38.55, I'm getting the sense 我觉得
14:39.41, that you're not the biggest fan of "Allegria"? 你好像不那么喜欢我做的"阿雷古丽娜"
14:41.38, You got a name for it now? Great. 你还给它起了个名字 真棒
14:43.15, All right. Cards on the table? 好吧 要我说实话
14:44.37, This is not your best work. 你可以做得更好的
14:46.36, Now look, don't get me wrong. 听着 别会错意
14:48.16, You're a talented kid. 你挺有才的
14:49.46, You're gonna be a big success in the world. 终有一天你会展翅翱翔
14:50.70, But this... this is a swing and a miss. 但这个 纯粹是瞎胡闹嘛
14:53.29, - Well, but my mom said it was-- - It's great, yeah, I know. 不过妈说-你妈说很好 我知道
14:55.91, But how did she say it? 不过你注意到她的语气了吗
14:57.61, What do you mean? 什么意思
14:58.14, There's a big difference between "It's great," and "It's great." 很好和"还好"简直是天壤之别
15:01.88, You hear that? 你听出来了吗
15:02.39, It's great, And "It's great." 很好和"还好"
15:05.34, All I hear is a bunch of people telling me I'm great. 我只知道很多人都说我很有才
15:07.38, And that's a problem, because a lot of times 这就是问题所在了 因为很多时候
15:09.18, people will lie to you to protect your feelings, 人们怕你伤不起 故意说谎骗你
15:11.02, And that's not doing you any favors. 那对你完全没好处的
15:12.38, You get a lot farther in life 如果想走得更远
15:13.89, if you know what you're good at and what you're not. 就必须明白自己的优势和劣势所在
15:16.52, Now you can handle that, right? 现在能接受了吗
15:19.09, Yeah.-Of course you can. 恩-就知道你可以的
15:21.85, How you doing, honey? 你还好吧 亲爱的
15:23.05, I'm great. 还好啦
15:26.32, Okay, everybody, come on! 好了 大伙儿 动起来
15:28.09, Two minutes till dinner! Get ready! 还有两分钟开伙 准备好哟
15:29.48, Good! All right! 好啊 真棒
15:30.23, Oh, wow, Manny. What have you got there? 哇塞 曼尼 手上端的什么啊
15:32.23, He made a centerpiece! 他亲手做的餐桌装饰哦
15:33.66, - Oh, that's fantastic. - It's stunning. 真了不起-令人震惊
15:36.02, It's garbage. 就是个垃圾
15:37.44, No, no, no! 别别别啊
15:38.77, What are you doing? It's so beautiful! 你干什么呀 多漂亮啊
15:40.57, Stop the lies. 别骗我了
15:41.84, Jay told me the truth. 杰跟我说实话了
15:42.67, What did you say? 你胡说些什么了
15:44.04, I mentioned it wasn't his best effort. 我就说他可以做得更好啊
15:45.54, He said it was a swing and a miss. 他说我那是瞎胡闹
15:46.91, Why?! Why do you say these things, jay?! 为什么 为什么你要泼冷水啊 杰
15:49.05, It's like I married my mother! 你简直跟我老妈一模一样
15:50.48, Jay, why would you do that? 杰 你为何那样啊
15:51.90, Because he's a Pritchett. 他们家人都这德行
15:52.77, But don't let these negative nellies drag you down, Manny, 不过别被那些小人打击到 曼尼
15:55.52, Because one day you could have a trillion-dollar idea 总有一天 你会想出个点石成金的创意
15:57.77, -that the people who supposedly love you most-- - Okay, Phil! 那些理应最爱你的人-够了菲尔
16:00.96, That's it. Go get the head-scratcher. 别说了 去拿你的头部按摩仪吧
16:03.23, The real head-scratcher, "Tm"? 真正的挠头仪 "不求人"吗
16:04.93, Go get it, and let everybody else decide 去拿过来 让大伙儿瞧瞧
16:06.84, how many trillions I've cost you. 我耽误了你挣多少金子
16:08.82, Way ahead of you. 多到你想都不敢想
16:10.27, What's going on here? 什么状况啊
16:11.30, We are about to make hat history. 我们要书写帽子的新历史了
16:14.07, Or as I like to call it, "Hatstory." 我更愿意称之为"帽史"
16:17.33, Early man had hours and hours to scratch his weary head. 先民们无所事事 终日可以自挠头皮
16:20.87, But what about today's busy times? 而今快节奏社会 哪来时间挠
16:25.68, Thank you, squire. 谢谢你 小卢子
16:27.04, Great thing about this? 这项伟大的发明妙在何处
16:28.98, You can wear it anywhere. 你可以随时随地都戴上
16:32.39, Hit it, buddy. 开秀吧 伙计
16:34.00, Oh! 我靠
16:35.35, It's like a thousand tiny angels 就像成千上万的小天使
16:37.42, are line dancing on my sca-- 在我的头皮上开舞林大会...
16:40.26, I... it looks like we got a slight malfunction in a rear nogginizer. 我去 似乎头部按摩仪出了点小故障
16:44.60, Oh! Shut her down! Shut her down, buddy! 不要啊 快关了 快关了啊伙计
16:47.20, - It's not working! - My hair! It's got my hair! 停不了啊-一剪没啊 发如血啊
16:49.93, Okay! Fine. 好吧 算了
16:51.70, That--I'm fine. 我没事
16:53.24, Forgot about that feature. It's an exfoliating... scrub. 去他妈的神奇功能吧 简直是剥头皮
16:55.85, Buddy, can you grab the safety shears? 儿子 给老爸把安全剪拿来
16:57.66, You know what, Phil? Keep it up. 我告诉你 菲尔 坚持就是胜利
16:59.43, And I admire you and Manny. 同是天涯沦落人
17:01.30, I know what it's like to stare down skepticism from a loved one. 我明白被心爱的人质疑的滋味
17:04.21, Cam, not now. 小卡 现在不是时候
17:05.17, Why not now? It's Thanksgiving. 有什么不行 感恩节良辰吉日啊
17:06.41, Families gather. Issues come up. 家人团聚 问题爆发
17:08.17, Only if you bring them up. 问题也是你提出来才有的啊
17:09.50, It's healthy to get things out in the open. 打开天窗说亮话对谁都好
17:11.62, Y'all know my punkin chunkin story, 你们都听过我的射南瓜轶事吧
17:13.19, or do you need a refresher? 要不要我再帮你们复习一下
17:14.52, - We've heard it. -Oh, several times. 我们听过-好几遍呢
17:15.69, I love it. 我喜欢那个故事
17:16.70, With Cody and the friends? 是和科迪还有别的朋友一起的那个吗
17:18.76, Yes. So you know how it ends. 没错 所以你们知道故事结局吧
17:20.20, But the question is, who here thinks I made that up? 但问题是 觉得我瞎编的举手
17:24.90, Oh. Well, doesn't that tell the whole story right there? 看吧 简直是泾渭分明 清清楚楚啊
17:28.74, Here we have the skeptics, the dream-squashers... 这边是我们的怀疑派 打压别人梦想的人
17:31.99, the Pritchetts. 普里契特一家
17:33.28, And here we have the dreamers, the artists, the visionaries. 而这边是梦想家 艺术家和有远见的人
17:37.37, Sweet Caroline! 苍天大地啊
17:38.83, So we're supposed to believe that 难道要让我们相信
17:40.58, you make a-a pumpkin fly across a football field. 你让一个南瓜飞过了整个足球场
17:43.88, Yeah. I can prove it to you right now. 对 我现在就能证明给你们看
17:44.84, Let's go to the football field. 我们去足球场
17:45.68, Yes! Let's do this. I'd love to end this. 行 去就去 我希望争议就此结束
17:47.52, Yeah! Let's settle this! 就是 我们去比试一场吧
17:48.50, Dreamers versus Pritchetts! 梦想家对普里契特一家
17:49.67, Bravo! Bravo! When I say "Punkin," You say "Chunkin"! 太棒了 我说南瓜你说射
17:52.10, - Punkin! Punkin! - No, no, no! -南瓜 南瓜 -不 停下来
17:53.97, Hold it! I did not just cook for eight hours 站住 我做了8个小时的饭菜
17:57.81, so you people could run off to prove some asinine point 不是为了让你们跑出去证明些愚蠢的观点
18:00.92, that's only gonna make half of us feel bad! 输掉的那一方会很难过的
18:03.11, Come on! Show a little respect. 拜托 尊重下我的劳动成果好吗
18:09.73, Turkey smells great, sweetheart. 火鸡闻起来很香 亲爱的
18:11.36, Is that turkey? 那是火鸡吗
18:12.73, Because something smells like chicken. 我怎么觉得闻起来像鸡味[胆小鬼
18:14.67, - Okay, let's settle this. - Yeah. -好吧 我们一决胜负吧 -太好了
18:16.53, Vamos, vamos! Jay, I drive! 大家来吧 杰 我开车
18:17.60, When I say "Punkin," You say "Chunkin"! 我说南瓜你说射
18:18.77, Punkin! Chunkin! 南瓜 射
18:20.67, This is the coolest thing ever. 简直是我经历过最酷的事儿
18:22.76, Okay, I want to film. 我要录下来
18:24.36, Ay, no, wait, I want to be in it. 不 等一下 我也要露个脸
18:25.93, Hey, Cam, are you sure this is going to work? 小卡 你确定这样可以吗
18:27.54, Oh, god, you sound just like Cody. 天呐 你说话的语气和科迪一模一样
18:30.09, Do you think this could launch a human? 你觉得这个可不可以用来发射一个人
18:31.77, Luke... 卢克
18:33.51, - Let's do the pumpkin first. - Okay. 我们还是先发射南瓜吧-好
18:36.54, They're having fun over there, 他们在那儿玩的真开心
18:37.38, but you know it's gonna end in tears. 但最后肯定是悲剧结尾
18:38.85, Yeah, always does. 对 向来都是
18:39.80, Knock-knock. Who's there? 敲门敲门 谁啊
18:41.30, Physics. 物理学
18:42.09, - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 谢谢-不用
18:43.22, Who's gonna be able to launch it? 谁应该来发射它
18:44.39, I think it should be Cam! 我觉得是小卡
18:45.69, Oh, no! I think it should be all of us! 哦不 我觉得应该是我们所有人一起
18:46.97, All of us! All of us! 所有人 所有人
18:47.86, Just get right here. Whoo! 到这儿来 哇
18:50.12, For the record, I don't squash all of Phil's dreams. 我必须声明 我没有打压菲尔所有的梦想
18:53.27, Just the ones that are, you know, potentially fatal. 只是那些 可能会 注定悲剧的
18:55.35, I'm just trying to get the kid ready for life. 我只是想让那孩子准备好来面对现实生活
18:57.28, Yeah. Yes, I-if we didn't do this to them, 对 如果我们不对他们狠一点
18:59.03, the world would. 在社会上也会撞得鼻青脸肿
19:00.50, Okay, everybody, in final launching positions? 好 大家各就各位准备好要发射了吗
19:02.50, Get ready to eat some crow! 准备接受羞"乳"吧
19:04.34, It is not as delicious as it sounds. 羞"乳"的味道可不怎么美味哦
19:07.38, Okay...
19:08.39, Uno!
19:09.29, Dos! Tres! Three! 二 三
19:15.01, What happened, Cam? 怎么回事 小卡
19:16.64, I don't know. I-I don't know. 我不知道 我 我不知道
19:18.40, Can we do it again? 我们再试一次行吗
19:19.44, No, we only had one pumpkin, 不 我们只有一个南瓜
19:21.23, and we just chunk it. 而我们刚刚发射掉了
19:24.21, - Well, we were right. - Aw, yeah. -就说嘛 我们是对的 -哈 是的
19:27.61, I'm sorry, guys. 对不起
19:29.88, This usually feels a little better, doesn't it? 通常我们赢了应该更开心才对啊 对吧
19:31.43, Yeah.-Huh? Mm. 是的-是吧
19:33.45, All right. I-I hate to admit it, 好吧 虽然我不愿意承认这点
19:34.51, but when they put the pumpkin in, 但是当他们把南瓜放进去的时候
19:36.35, I was kind of hoping it would work. 我有一点希望他们能成功
19:37.62, Yeah.-me,too. 是的-我也是
19:40.45, All right! Let the gloating begin. 好吧 开始幸灾乐祸吧
19:42.72, You know, it was a pretty good try. 你知道吗 其实是一次好的尝试
19:44.43, We don't need your pity. 我们不需要你们的同情
19:46.00, Let's just get this stuff cleaned up. 我们清理一下球场吧
19:47.90, Well--or if--if maybe we, um... 或者 或者我们可以
19:52.68, - We launch it from a steeper angle? - Yeah. 试一下用更大的倾斜角发射-是的
19:54.66, Then...maybe if you had somebody else, 然后 如果你们能有多一些人
19:56.30, you know, helping you pull the thing. 一起帮你们拉它
19:57.80, But we don't have any more pumpkins. 但是我们没有多余的南瓜了
19:59.16, That's the easy part! 那很简单
20:00.50, They're on every porch up and down the block. 街坊邻居家家户户门前都有
20:02.98, - Oh, we can handle that. Come on, kid! - Yeah. -我们可以搞定 来吧 -是的
20:04.47, Come on. Let's try one. 来吧 让我们再试一次
20:05.73, Okay! All right! Let's do it! 好吧 我们再试一次
20:07.09, I say "Punkin," Gang says "Chunkin"! 我说南瓜大家说射
20:09.45, There are dreamers and there are realists in this world. 这个世界上有梦想家 也有现实主义者
20:13.26, You'd think the dreamers would find the dreamers 你可能会觉得梦想家们喜欢聚在一起
20:15.33, and the realists would find the realists, 现实主义者又聚成另外的小集体
20:17.00, but more often than not, the opposite is true. 但是往往 二者喜欢混搭在一起
20:20.44, Maybe if this works, 如果这个成功了
20:21.50, we should launch my centerpiece next. 我们下一个应该发射我做的餐桌装饰
20:22.84, It wasn't that bad. 它没有那么糟糕啦
20:24.13, Your rice pilaf was. 你做的手抓饭倒是挺糟糕的
20:27.48, Jay, be careful! 杰 小心点儿
20:29.38, Okay. All right. 好的 准备
20:30.95, Oh! Oh! Keep going, keep going! Keep going! 好 好 继续用力 继续用力
20:36.59, You see, the dreamers need the realists 其实 梦想家需要现实主义者
20:38.19, to keep them from soaring too close to the sun. 提醒他们 不要把梦想放飞得过高
20:40.34, And the realists... 而现实主义者
20:42.96, Well, without the dreamers, 如果没有梦想家的话
20:45.18, they might not ever get off the ground. 可能永远无法将梦想放飞
20:50.16, Okay! Next one's going through the--the goal thingy, 好 下一个一定会穿过球门
20:53.73, I can feel it! 我能感觉到
20:59.03, Now when Lorna, Cody, and I did this, it was-- 当洛娜 科迪和我做这件事的时候
21:01.18, less talkin', more chunkin. 少说话 多用力
21:02.46, Mom, I need to tell you something. 妈妈 我要告诉你一件事
21:03.41, What is it, honey? 是什么 宝贝
21:04.28, Ready! 准备
21:05.20, I distracted Haley while she was driving, 海莉开车的时候 我让她分心了
21:06.77, And we dented your car. 我们把你的车撞出了一个凹痕
21:07.82, Fire! 发射
21:15.97, Well, girls... 姑娘们
21:18.07, Three more seconds, and you would have gotten away with it. 再忍三秒 就追究不到你们头上了
21:22.38, Now a human? 现在射人了吧
21:23.75, Come here, Lily. 过来吧 莉莉
21:25.11, Luke, no. 卢克 别犯二

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