英语修辞与写作·21.3　描写

21.3　描写

21.3A　描写体的特征和使用场合

1） 描写的目的是通过语言给读者或听者以生动、鲜明的形象。这些形象虽然是以文字描写出来的，但有时比具体色彩绘成的形象更有感染力，因为它们不但有人或物的形状，还会让读者或听者感到声响，思维变化以及颜料无法表达的一些韵味。

前面19.2B和21.2A都提到时空（Time & Space）概念，这在描写中更有集中体现；虽然同记叙相比，记叙更重时间，而描写更重空间，从而使被描写的对象形象鲜明和具有立体感。这里是法国女作家Francine du Plessix Gray笔下的一座小城堡：

The landscape out of Aunt Charlotte's window was as flat as any in my memory; there was not a hillock, not a rock, to disturb the monotonous platitude of its horizon. A serene, dead-straight alley of luxuriant chestnut trees stretched from the little castle to the country road. To the left, stood some dilapidated buildings that had once served as stables and servants' quarters. The old greenhouse to the right of the entrance had also been abandoned since the war, when the family fortune declined sharply. In the flower beds circling about the castle's entrance, only the simplest and most tenacious of flowers — hydrangeas, geraniums — fought their way nobly through tall clumps of weeds.

2） 描写文体常见于下述四种场合：

第一是在日常谈话或商业广告中对有关对象的某些主要特征加以简要描写，这种描写方法叫做 Popular method；

第二是在旅游胜地介绍和小说中对有关对象的多方面特征加以合理组织和富有技巧的描写，从而推出鲜明丰满的艺术形象，这种描写叫做Artistic method；

第三是在科技文章对有关对象的特性加以完整、准确的描写，如同摄影和复印一样，目的给人以真实的印象，这种描写叫做Scientific method;

第四是在诗歌和其他一些文艺作品中通过描写激发读者或听者的联想，并通过自己的想象得到艺术享受和启迪，这种描写叫做Suggestive method。

当然，这四种方法是指基本特征而言，不可将它们截然分开，因为在实际使用中也会相互渗透的。

21.3B　写好描写文的两个关键

1） 好的描写一定要抓住两个关键：突出的印象和丰实的细节。试比较下面两个描写主题句：

（a） The student lounge is a place where students congregate in a leisurely fashion and as a consequence it is not always attractive and neat.

（b） The student lounge is a messy room.

上述（a）句过于松散，主题被冲淡了，给读者的印象模糊，而（b）句简练有力，messy一词立刻抓住了读者的注意力：怎么样的一个messy room呢？

接下去就是要做好细节描写。如照上述（b）句进行描写，就要紧紧围绕messy着笔，不要写学生如何做功课，也不要写墙上有什么彩色画报，而要写诸如吐在地毯上的口香糖、肮脏的桌子上抛下的蛋壳、三明治包装纸、塞满烟灰和烟蒂的饮料盒，等等。

练习二十一　（Exercise Twenty-one）

I. Preview Questions:

1. What are the two types of argumentation?

2. Can you tell the difference between “proposition argument” and “problem-solution argument”?

3. How many basic tactics should you bear in mind in logical reasoning?

4. Which, between deduction and induction, is the approach of reasoning from a general idea or set of facts to a particular idea or facts?

5. Syllogism refers to a reasoned argument in which there are two statements leading to a third statement. Do you know how to call these statements?

6. What are the four basic structures in Syllogism?

7. Why is it important to make sure that the major premise must be correct?

8. What two basic orders can you follow in Narration?

9. How many basic elements does Narration consist of?

10. Are the four basic methods in Description separated from or integrated with each other?

11. Do you think it advisable to use as much details as possible in Description?

II. Read the following and discuss whether the principles are applicable to argument writing:

As in expository papers, argument papers consist of an introduction, a body, and a conclusion. The introduction gives background and stimulates the reader's interest in the problem or proposal. But in argument, you must also convince your readers that they can trust you and that they can benefit from your proposition, otherwise they are unlikely to be persuaded.

The body of the paper, too, must reflect your commitment to your readers. The ordering of your points, the kind of evidence you present, the appeals you make, all should reflect your concern for the needs of your readers. The organization of your paper should enhance your reasoning processes and your persuasive tactics. Supporting evidence can consist of statistics, authority, analogy, facts, case studies, historical or social background, or explanation of causes. These should be so presented that, along with the language you use and the way you order the material, they help you develop your argument as forcefully as possible.

The conclusion should summarize the argument and restate the proposition. In addition, to be most effective, it should make an appeal to the readers for whatever action may be appropriate. This appeal can be emotional, capitalizing on the sympathy or indignation that you have stirred in readers. Or you may appeal to the decency and fairness of your audience, or point out how your proposition can affect them.

III. Outline the following short argument.

Notes for reference: Your outline should focus on these points: What is the implicit proposition? The main arguments? Is the appeal emotional, logical, or a combination of the two? How is refutation handled? How effective is the conclusion? What kind of proofs does the writer rely on?

Once people are liberated from the confines of automobiles, there will be a greatly increased interest in hiking, exploring, and backcountry packtrips. Fortunately the parks, by the mere elimination of motor traffic, will come to seem far bigger than they are now — there will be more room for more persons, an astonishing expansion of space. This follows from the interesting fact that a motorized vehicle, when not at rest, requires a volume of space far out of proportion to its size. To illustrate: imagine a lake approximately ten miles long and on the average one mile wide. A single motorboat could easily circumnavigate the lake in an hour; ten motorboats would begin to crowd it; twenty or thirty, all in operation, would dominate the lake to the exclusion of any other form of activity; and fifty would create the hazards, confusion, and turmoil that make pleasure impossible. Suppose we banned motorboats and allowed only canoes and rowboats; we would see at once that the lake seemed ten or perhaps a hundred times bigger. The same thing holds true, to an even greater degree, for the automobile. Distance and space are functions of speed and time. Without expending a single dollar from the United States Treasury we could, if we wanted to, multiply the area of our national parks tenfold or a hundredfold — simply by banning the private automobile. The next generation, all 250 million of them, would be grateful to us.

IV. Identify the topic sentence, the incidents, and the conclusion in the following paragraph.

Notes for reference: Narration is frequently used to tell about personal experiences. You have a variety of personal experiences every day, but they will not necessarily make an effective narrative except they can attract the reader's interest. Most often, the writer may have a goal to describe an experience that has some unusual meaning or significance both for the writer and for the reader. In the following sample paragraph, the writer uses narration to give a factual account of an event — the discovery of Wheaties. Notice that the writer has chosen to explain the different incidents in a simple chronological order.

Like gravity and penicillin, Wheaties was discovered by accident. In 1921, a health clinician named Minnenrode, in Minneapolis, was mixing up a batch of bran gruel for his patients when he spilled some on a hot stove. He heard it crackle and sizzle, and had a taste. Delicious, he thought. He took his cooled gruel to the Washburn Crosby Company, which in 1928 would merge with three mills to become General Mills. Favorably impressed, Washburn Crosby gave Minnenrode use of a laboratory. Alas, his flakes crumbled too easily and turned to dust in a box. Exit Minnenrode, enter George Cormack, Washburn Crosby's head miller. Cormack tested 36 varieties of wheat. He cracked them, he steamed them, he mixed them with syrup, he cooked them, he dried them, he rolled them. Finally he found the perfect flakes.

（Steve Walf）

V. Read the following passages and point out rhetorical features you have noticed in item:

1. The chair was the one piece of furniture I wanted to take with me when I closed up my parents' house for the final time. To look at it, sitting in the same kitchen corner where it had been fifty years, you'd wonder how it could be my favorite chair, its seat scratched here and there from the soles of a small boy's shoes. The only thing unusual about it was the intricate design carved into its back. But the carving was what made the chair meaningful to me. ...

2. Erethizon dorsatus, an antisocial character of the northern U. S. and Canadian forest, commonly called a porcupine, looks like an uncombed head, has a grumpy personality, fights with his tail, hides his head when he's in trouble, floats like a cork, attacks backing up, retreats going ahead, and eats toilet seats as if they were Post Toasties. It's a sad commentary on his personality that people are always trying to do him in.

3. On the outskirts of a little town upon a rise of land that swept back from the railway there was a tidy little cottage of white boards, trimmed vividly with green blinds. To one side of the house there was a garden neatly patterned with plots of growing vegetables, and an arbor for the grapes which ripened late in August. Before the house there were three mighty oaks which sheltered it in their clean and massive shade in summer, and to the other side there was a border of gay flowers. The whole place had an air of tidiness, thrift, and modest comfort.

参考答案

Ⅳ.　Topic sentence Like gravity and penicillin, Wheaties was discovered by accident.

Incident 1 In 1921, a health clinician named Minnenrode, in Minneapolis, was mixing up a batch of bran gruel for his patients when he spilled some on a hot stove. He heard it crackle and sizzle, and had a taste. Delicious, he thought.

Incident 2 He took his cooled gruel to the Washburn Crosby Company, which in 1928 would merge with three mills to become General Mills.

Incident 3 Favorably impressed, Washburn Grosby gave Minnenrode use of a laboratory. Alas, his flakes crumbled too easily and turned to dust in a box.

Incident 4 Exit Minnenrode, enter George Cormack, Washburn Crosby's head miller.

Incident 5 Cormack tested 36 varieties of wheat. He cracked them, he steamed them, he mixed them with syrup, he cooked them, he dried them, he rolled them.

Conclusion Finally he found the perfect flakes.

V. 1. This paragraph is a description consisting of details of location and appearance.

2. In this paragraph of description, simile and irony are used.

3. This paragraph by the novelist Thomas Wolfe draws a picture of idealized attractiveness in describing a modest home. The last sentence sums up the scene and constitutes a kind of direct statement of feeling, as do such modifiers as “neatly”, “clean”, “gay.” But on the whole it is the images that create the sense of middle-class fulfilment.