书虫5级《理智与情感》10．返回巴顿

10. Return to Barton

Marianne recovered so well that within a week she was able to travel home, with her mother and Elinor, in Colonel Brandon's carriage. Elinor was pleased to see that Marianne showed a new firmness of mind and calmness of expression. Although she was clearly still upset when she thought of the past, she was now able to control her feelings, and show a cheerful face to her family. She started planning a new life for herself.

When I am stronger, Elinor, we will take long walks together every day. I shall never get up later than six, and I shall spend every morning practising my music or reading.'

Elinor smiled, doubting whether this plan would last very long, but happy to see Marianne enthusiastic again.

A couple of days later, the weather was so fine that Mrs Dashwood encouraged Elinor to take Marianne out for a gentle walk, and the sisters set out along the quiet country road.

There, exactly there,' said Marianne, pointing to the hill behind the house, 'is where I fell, and first saw Willoughby. I am thankful to find that I can see the place with so little pain! Can we talk on that subject now, do you think, Elinor?'

She was affectionately encouraged to speak openly.

I know how badly I have behaved! My illness has given me time to think. I should never have been so incautious in my behaviour with Willoughby, and so impolite to other people. I know now that my own uncontrolled feelings caused my suffering, and even my illness was all my own fault. I have been unkind and unfair to almost everybody I know!—but especially to you, dearest Elinor. Did I follow your example? No! Did I help or comfort you, when you were suffering? No! I only thought of my own sorrow and my own broken heart.'

Elinor, impatient to calm her, praised her honesty.

I can never forget Willoughby,' continued Marianne, 'but my memories no longer make me miserable. If I only knew that he did not always intend to deceive me, that he had some good in him, I would have much greater peace of mind.'

Elinor took a deep breath, and passed on to her sister what Willoughby had told her. Marianne said nothing, but tears ran down her face. They were now on their way back to the cottage, and as they reached the door, she kissed Elinor gratefully, whispered, 'Tell mama,' and went slowly upstairs.

When Mrs Dashwood heard the story, she expressed some pity for Willoughby. But for her, nothing could remove the guilt of his behaviour towards Eliza, and then Marianne.

In the evening, when they were all together, Marianne spoke again of Willoughby. 'I wish to tell you both,' she told her mother and Elinor, in a trembling voice, 'that what Elinor told me this morning was a great relief to me. I could never have been happy with him, after knowing all this.'

I know, I know!' cried her mother. 'My Marianne, happy with a scoundrel like that? No!'

Marianne, you consider the matter,' said Elinor, 'exactly as a sensible person should. And I expect you realize that marriage to him would have involved you in many troubles and disappointments. You would always have been poor, and perhaps your influence on his heart would have lessened, as he realized his selfish demands could not be met.'

Selfish? Do you think him selfish?' said Marianne. 'Yes, you are right, it is true. How foolish I was!'

I am more to blame than you, my child,' said Mrs Dashwood. 'I should have discovered his intentions earlier.'

During the next few days Marianne continued to get stronger, and life at Barton fell back into the old routines.

Elinor grew impatient for some news of Edward, but the news arrived in a rather unexpected way. Mrs Dashwood's manservant, Thomas, had been sent to Exeter one morning on business, and on his return finished his report with these words:

I suppose you know, madam, that Mr Ferrars is married.'

Marianne looked quickly at Elinor's white face, and burst into uncontrolled sobbing. Mrs Dashwood did not know which daughter to take care of first. She and Margaret led Marianne to another room, and then Mrs Dashwood hurried back to Elinor, who, although clearly upset, had been able to start questioning Thomas. At once Mrs Dashwood took that trouble upon herself.

Who told you that Mr Ferrars was married, Thomas?'

I saw him myself, madam, with his lady, Miss Steele, as her name was then. Miss Steele called to me from a carriage, and asked after the young ladies' health. Then she smiled and said she had changed her name since she was last in Devon.'

Was Mr Ferrars in the carriage with her?'

Yes, madam. He was sitting next to her, but I didn't see his face. And Mr Ferrars isn't a gentleman for talking much.'

Did Mrs Ferrars look well?'

Yes, madam, very well, and extremely happy.'

Thomas was then sent away, and Elinor and her mother sat in thoughtful silence. Mrs Dashwood now realized that Elinor had hidden her feelings for Edward, in order to spare her mother any unhappiness. She felt guilty that Marianne's suffering had taken up so much of her time, when her eldest daughter was probably just as much in need of her care and attention. Elinor herself was extremely miserable. She had always had a secret hope that something might happen to prevent his marrying Lucy. But now he really was married, and she could not bear the thought of it.

A few days later, a gentleman was seen riding up to their front door. At first Elinor thought it must be Colonel Brandon, but it was not him. In fact, it looked just like Edward. She looked again. It was Edward. She moved away from the window, and sat down. 'I will be calm. I will—must—be calm.'

Her mother and sisters had recognized Edward too, but not a word was spoken, and they all waited in silence for their visitor to appear. He entered, looking pale, agitated and afraid. Mrs Dashwood greeted him kindly, and wished him every happiness. He blushed, and said something no one could hear.

Elinor, desperately, began to talk about the weather. When she had finished expressing her extreme delight in the dryness of the season, a very awful pause took place. It was ended by Mrs Dashwood, who felt it necessary to hope that Mrs Ferrars was well. Edward replied hurriedly that she was.

Another pause.

Is Mrs Ferrars in Plymouth?' asked Elinor, bravely.

Plymouth!' he said, surprised. 'No, my mother is in London.'

I meant,' said Elinor, taking up her sewing from the table, 'to ask about Mrs Edward Ferrars.'

He blushed, looked puzzled, hesitated, then said, 'Perhaps you mean—my brother—you mean Mrs Robert Ferrars.'

Mrs Robert Ferrars!' repeated Marianne and Mrs Dashwood in the greatest astonishment. Elinor could not speak.

Yes,' said Edward, hurriedly, 'you may not have heard that my brother is now married to—to—to Miss Lucy Steele.'

Elinor could sit there no longer. She ran out of the room, and as soon as the door was closed, burst into tears of happiness. Until then Edward had avoided looking at her; now he watched her hurry away, and seemed to fall into a dream. At last, without saying a word, he got up, left the room, and walked out of the house.

Great was the astonishment he left behind him. One thing, however, was certain. Edward was now free, and it was not hard to guess how he would use this freedom. Walking about in the fresh air made him feel brave enough to return, and when they all sat down to tea at four o'clock, Edward had won his lady, gained her mother's permission, and was the happiest man alive.

His heart was now open to Elinor, with his weaknesses and mistakes confessed, and his boyish attachment to Lucy discussed with all the wise experience of a man of twenty-four.

My engagement to Lucy certainly was foolish,' said he, 'but it would not have happened if my mother had allowed me to choose a profession. I had nothing to do, and no friends to advise me, so I imagined myself in love. When I met you, my dear Elinor, I realized at once how weak I had been.'

Elinor's mother and sisters were delighted; they could not love Edward enough, nor praise Elinor enough.

And Elinor—how can her feelings be described? From the moment of learning that Edward was free, to the moment of his asking her to marry him, her mind was in a storm. But when all doubt was past and she heard his voice expressing his deep love and affection for her, she knew her happiness was complete.

Edward stayed at the cottage for a week, and one of the first subjects of discussion was of course Lucy's marriage. It appeared that Robert had visited her several times, trying to persuade her to set Edward free. Lucy had realized that it was now Robert, not Edward, who would inherit his mother's fortune. Being of similarly selfish character, they were attracted to each other, and decided to get married with speed and secrecy.

Edward's mother was, naturally, horrified by Robert's marriage. She did not greatly approve of Edward's engagement to Elinor either, but in the end was persuaded to accept it, and even, rather unwillingly, gave Edward ten thousand pounds; she had given the same to Fanny on her marriage. This was much more than was expected by Edward and Elinor, who could now afford to marry very soon, and move into the vicar's house at Delaford.

There they were visited by all their friends and relations, who found them one of the happiest couples in the world. Even Mrs Ferrars came to visit them, although they were never favourites with her. That honour was reserved for Robert and Lucy, who, by endless attentions and respectful messages, finally regained their place in her heart. The whole of Lucy's behaviour in the matter may be seen as a most encouraging example of what self-interest can do to gain wealth and position. With Mrs Ferrars' generous help, Robert and Lucy lived in great comfort, often visiting John and Fanny Dashwood; only their frequent domestic disagreements spoiled their happiness.

Elinor's move to Delaford did not separate her from her family, as her mother and sisters spent half their time with her. Mrs Dashwood was anxious to bring Marianne and Colonel Brandon together, which was also Elinor's and Edward's wish. Knowing how good, how kind the colonel was, and how fondly he was attached to her, what could Marianne do?

At the age of seventeen she had believed that passionate feeling was the most important thing in life. She had had her heart broken, and learnt to recover from it. Then at nineteen, with feelings of only warm friendship and respect, she agreed to marry a man she had once considered dull, and far too old for marriage!

But so it was. Colonel Brandon was now as happy as all those who loved him believed he deserved to be, and Marianne, who could never love by halves, came in time to love her husband as much as she had loved Willoughby.

Willoughby himself was saddened to hear of her marriage, but he did not die of a broken heart. He even managed to get some enjoyment out of life, as his wife was not always unpleasant, and his home not always uncomfortable. But Marianne remained his idea of the perfect woman, and he often refused to admire a new young beauty as 'nothing to compare with Mrs Brandon'.

Mrs Dashwood stayed on at Barton Cottage, and as Margaret soon grew old enough for dancing and falling in love, Sir John and Mrs Jennings did not miss Elinor and Marianne as much as they had feared. Barton and Delaford were connected by strong family affection, and there was constant communication between the two places. Elinor and Marianne lived in great happiness, loved and respected by their husbands, and almost within sight of each other. The passing of the years only served to bring them all closer together.