2022年12月25日 VOA慢速英语：呸骗子！有史以来最糟糕的圣诞电影
Bah, Humbug! The Worst Christmas Movies of All-Time
呸骗子！有史以来最糟糕的圣诞电影
呸骗子！有史以来最糟糕的圣诞电影
Not every Christmas movie can deliver the holidays feels, with Last Christmas, Christmas With the Kranks and nine others making our naughty list.
并非每部圣诞电影都能带来节日的感觉，《去年圣诞节》、《克兰克斯的圣诞节》和其他九部都在我们的顽皮名单上。
From ho-ho-ho to no-no-no.
从 ho-ho-ho 到 no-no-no。
We here are E! News love the holidays. The time spent with family. The seasonal beverages. The twinkling lights. The food. And, of course, the movies. There's nothing we love more than a cozy Sunday evening spent watching Hallmark's latest cheesy but irresistible Countdown to Christmas movie with a steaming cup of hot cocoa. (We have the evidence: We ranked all of 2022's offerings. Yes, all of them.)
我们在这里是 E！新闻喜欢假期。与家人共度的时光。季节性饮料。闪烁的灯光。食物。当然，还有电影。没有什么比在一个舒适的周日晚上一边喝着热气腾腾的热可可一边观看 Hallmark 最新的俗气但令人无法抗拒的圣诞倒计时电影更让我们喜爱的了。（我们有证据：我们对 2022 年的所有产品进行了排名。是的，所有这些。）
But while we love us a cheery Christmas offering, that doesn't mean we don't have standards: We can spot the difference between a gift (think classics like Home Alone, Christmas Vacation and Elf) and a lump of coal that leaves us colder than the frigid temps outside.
但是，虽然我们喜欢愉快的圣诞礼物，但这并不意味着我们没有标准：我们可以辨别礼物（想想像《小鬼当家》、 《圣诞假期 》和《小精灵》这样的经典作品）和离开我们的煤块之间的区别比外面寒冷的温度还要冷。
Not every seasonal outing can go on to become annual event programming like Love Actually or The Santa Clause. Some destined to end up at the tail-end of Netflix's Christmas suggestions scroll.
并非每一次季节性郊游都能像Love Actually或The Santa Clause那样成为年度活动节目。有些注定会出现在 Netflix 圣诞节建议卷轴的末尾。
So which Christmas films over the years have failed to become classics, instead becoming go-to examples of the holidays gone very wrong?
那么这些年来有哪些圣诞电影未能成为经典，反而成为了节日大错特错的典范？
Last Christmas
上一个圣诞节
Lesson learned from this recent rom-com starring Emilia Clarke and Henry Golding, two human embodiments of warm and fuzzy feelings, and written by the equally-as-charming Emma Thompson? A lyric in a beloved Christmas song ("Last Christmas" by George Michael) does not a good Christmas movie make.
从最近这部由艾米莉亚克拉克和亨利戈尔丁主演的 rom-com 中吸取教训，这两个人类体现了温暖和模糊的感觉，由同样迷人的艾玛汤普森编写？一首心爱的圣诞歌曲（乔治迈克尔的“去年圣诞节” ）中的歌词并不是一部好的圣诞电影。
Choice Review: "It's the kind of bad that falls somewhere between finding a lump of coal in your stocking and discovering one painfully lodged in your rectum."
选择评论：“这是一种介于在你的袜子里发现一块煤和发现一个痛苦地卡在你的直肠之间的坏事。”
Deck the Halls
装饰大厅
If you like your Christmas movies with some cranky men and a lot of mean-spirited hijinks and very little charm, this comedy starring Matthew Broderick and Danny DeVito is for you, ya Grinch.
如果你喜欢你的圣诞电影中有一些脾气暴躁的男人和很多卑鄙的恶作剧而且很少有魅力，那么这部由马修布罗德里克和丹尼德维托主演的喜剧就是给你的，你是格林奇。
Choice Review: "You cannot believe how excruciatingly awful this movie is. It is bad in a way that will cause unfortunate viewers to huddle in the lobby afterward, hugging in small groups, consoling one another with the knowledge that it's over, it's over—thank God, it's over."
Choice 评论：“你无法相信这部电影有多么糟糕。它的糟糕程度会导致不幸的观众事后挤在大厅里，三五成群地拥抱，互相安慰，知道它结束了，它结束了——感谢上帝，一切都结束了。”
The Nutcracker and the Four Realms
胡桃夹子和四个王国
Um, at least Keira Knightley seemed to be having fun in this colorful, wild and wackadoodle reimagination of The Nutcracker? Despite (very) early hype, The Nutcracker and the Four Realms became one of the biggest box office bombs of 2018.
嗯，至少凯拉奈特莉似乎在胡桃夹子的这个多彩，狂野和怪诞的重新想象中很有趣？尽管（非常）早期炒作，胡桃夹子和四个王国成为 2018 年最大的票房炸弹之一。
Choice Review: "What in the cuckoo Christmas blasphemy is this?"
选择评论：“布谷鸟圣诞节的亵渎是什么？”
Four Christmases
四个圣诞节
On paper, this movie sounds great: America's sweetheart Reese Witherspoon and America's wise-ass Vince Vaughn as a couple having to visit four messy, complicated and inappropriate families on Christmas. But this rom-com-gone-wrong proved to be riddled with clichés and felt staler than your Aunt Karen's fruitcake.
从表面上看，这部电影听起来很棒：美国的甜心瑞茜·威瑟斯彭和美国的聪明人文斯·沃恩作为一对夫妇不得不在圣诞节拜访四个凌乱、复杂和不合适的家庭。但事实证明，这部 rom-com-gone-wrong 充满了陈词滥调，而且感觉比你凯伦阿姨的水果蛋糕还陈旧。
Choice Review: "It's Four Christmases in need of a wedding, or maybe a funeral."
选择评论：“这是四个圣诞节，需要一场婚礼，或者一场葬礼。
Fred Claus
弗雷德·克劳斯
And Vaughn is 0-for-2 when it comes to Christmas movies, with his 2007 comedy about Santa's cranky and bitter Scrooge of an older bro failing to earn many laughs...or money.
沃恩 (Vaughn) 在 2007 年的圣诞电影中是 0 比 2 的喜剧，讲述了圣诞老人脾气暴躁、苦涩的守财奴（Scrooge）和一个年长的兄弟未能赢得很多笑声……或金钱。
Choice Review: "The movie is less ho-ho-ho than uh-oh, or oh-no."
选择评论：“这部电影不像呃哦，或者哦不。”
Jack Frost
杰克弗罗斯特
Imagine a Christmas movie about a dead father (who died on Christmas Day, by the way, after always traveling for work and not really being present with his family) returning to his son as a snowman who came to life one day. Now imagine thinking that is not a horror movie. Alas, filmmakers believed this was the feel-good family film the world needed, with Michael Keaton starring as the dead-dad-turned-snowman. 1998, man, what a year.
想象一部关于一位死去的父亲（顺便说一下，他在圣诞节那天去世的圣诞电影，在他总是出差而不是真正与家人在一起之后）回到他的儿子身边，变成了有一天复活的雪人。现在想象一下，这不是一部恐怖电影。 las，电影制作人认为这是世界需要的感觉良好的家庭电影，迈克尔基顿主演了死去的父亲变成的雪人。 1998，伙计，多么美好的一年。
Christmas With the Kranks
与克兰克斯一起过圣诞节
While Tim Allen proved to have the holiday spirit with his blockbuster Santa Clause trilogy, the magic wore off for this 2004 family comedy. The concept was simple enough: The Home Improvement star and Jamie Lee Curtis play a couple frantically trying to put together a Christmas event in less than 24 hours after their adult daughter reveals she's going to be returning home after all. Alas, despite Allen and Curtis' comedic talents, there was no salvaging this hammy and clunky Christmas mess and it has the 5 percent Rotten Tomatoes rating to prove it.
蒂姆·艾伦 (Tim Allen) 凭借他的轰动一时的圣诞老人三部曲证明了自己的节日精神，但这部 2004 年的家庭喜剧的魔力逐渐消退。这个概念很简单：家装明星和杰米·李·柯蒂斯扮演一对夫妇，在他们成年的女儿透露她毕竟要回家后不到 24 小时内疯狂地试图组织一个圣诞节活动。唉，尽管艾伦和柯蒂斯有喜剧天赋，但还是没有挽救这个笨拙笨拙的圣诞节烂摊子，它有 5% 的烂番茄评级来证明这一点。
Choice Review: "Stinks like the unrefrigerated ham its studio sent me as a promotion several months ago."
Bad Santa 2
坏圣诞老人 2
Alternate title for this unnecessary and unfunny sequel to the surprise hit dark comedy starring Billy Bob Thornton? 2 Bad 4 Santa.
这部由比利·鲍伯·松顿主演的出人意料的热门黑色喜剧的续集的别名是什么？ 2坏4圣诞老人。
Choice Review: "We have long hoped that there might one day be a sequel. We need to be careful what we wish for."
选择评论：“我们一直希望有一天会有续集。我们需要小心我们的愿望。”
Love the Coopers
爱库珀
Nothing brings the family together during the holidays quite like divorce, right? Desperate for one last perfect Christmas as a fam, Diane Keaton and John Goodman play a couple planning to divorce just after their adult children visit for the holidays. We'll let you guess what happens. The movie wastes a majority of its stacked cast (Olivia Wilde, Anthony Mackie and Alan Arkin, oh my!) and just tries way too hard to hit you in your holiday feels. Example: A dog narrates the movie.
没有什么比离婚更能让家人在假期聚在一起了，对吧？黛安·基顿 (Diane Keaton) 和约翰·古德曼 (John Goodman) 扮演了一对夫妇，他们希望在成年子女来度假后就离婚，他们迫切希望一家人度过最后一个完美的圣诞节。我们会让你猜会发生什么。这部电影浪费了大部分演员阵容（奥利维亚·王尔德、安东尼·麦凯和艾伦·阿金，我的天哪！），而且太过努力地想在你的假期中打动你。示例：一只狗在讲述电影。
Miracle on 34th Street
第 34 街的奇迹
OK, here's the thing: the 1994 remake isn't a bad movie, it's just a completely unnecessary one. Starring Richard Attenborough, Dylan McDermott, Elizabeth Perkins and Mara Wilson, it doesn't really add anything new or special, which is obvious as the original 1947 still tends to get more airplay all these years later.
好吧，事情是这样的：1994 年的翻拍版并不是一部糟糕的电影，它只是一部完全没有必要的电影。由 Richard Attenborough、Dylan McDermott、Elizabeth Perkins 和 Mara Wilson 主演，它并没有真正添加任何新的或特别的东西，这是显而易见的，因为这些年之后，最初的 1947 年仍然有更多的播放机会。
Choice Review: "The movie's a slow-moving, overblown, never-better-than-competent rendition of the original."
选择评论：“这部电影是对原著的缓慢、夸张、再好不过的演绎。”
A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding
圣诞王子：皇家婚礼
Before you argue, let the record state that we thoroughly enjoyed the first film in the A Christmas Prince franchise (We cannot believe that is an actual thing, but here we are!) for how deliciously low-budget and unintentionally hilarious it was. There's a reason it became an unexpected meme-generator and developed a cult fanbase. HOWEVER, the 2018 sequel was so-bad-it's-bad, not so-bad-it's-good. The Netflix rom-com was lackluster, half-assed and, worst of all, BORING. Therefore we banished it from our queue..
在你争论之前，让记录表明我们非常享受圣诞王子系列中的第一部电影（我们不敢相信这是真实的，但我们就是这样！）因为它是多么美味的低预算和无意中的搞笑。它成为意想不到的模因生成器并发展出狂热的粉丝群是有原因的。然而，2018 年的续集太糟糕了，但还算不错。 Netflix rom-com 乏善可陈，半途而废，最糟糕的是，很无聊。因此我们将它从我们的队列中删除了..
从 ho-ho-ho 到 no-no-no。
We here are E! News love the holidays. The time spent with family. The seasonal beverages. The twinkling lights. The food. And, of course, the movies. There's nothing we love more than a cozy Sunday evening spent watching Hallmark's latest cheesy but irresistible Countdown to Christmas movie with a steaming cup of hot cocoa. (We have the evidence: We ranked all of 2022's offerings. Yes, all of them.)
我们在这里是 E！新闻喜欢假期。与家人共度的时光。季节性饮料。闪烁的灯光。食物。当然，还有电影。没有什么比在一个舒适的周日晚上一边喝着热气腾腾的热可可一边观看 Hallmark 最新的俗气但令人无法抗拒的圣诞倒计时电影更让我们喜爱的了。（我们有证据：我们对 2022 年的所有产品进行了排名。是的，所有这些。）
But while we love us a cheery Christmas offering, that doesn't mean we don't have standards: We can spot the difference between a gift (think classics like Home Alone, Christmas Vacation and Elf) and a lump of coal that leaves us colder than the frigid temps outside.
但是，虽然我们喜欢愉快的圣诞礼物，但这并不意味着我们没有标准：我们可以辨别礼物（想想像《小鬼当家》、 《圣诞假期 》和《小精灵》这样的经典作品）和离开我们的煤块之间的区别比外面寒冷的温度还要冷。
Not every seasonal outing can go on to become annual event programming like Love Actually or The Santa Clause. Some destined to end up at the tail-end of Netflix's Christmas suggestions scroll.
并非每一次季节性郊游都能像Love Actually或The Santa Clause那样成为年度活动节目。有些注定会出现在 Netflix 圣诞节建议卷轴的末尾。
So which Christmas films over the years have failed to become classics, instead becoming go-to examples of the holidays gone very wrong?
那么这些年来有哪些圣诞电影未能成为经典，反而成为了节日大错特错的典范？
Last Christmas
上一个圣诞节
Lesson learned from this recent rom-com starring Emilia Clarke and Henry Golding, two human embodiments of warm and fuzzy feelings, and written by the equally-as-charming Emma Thompson? A lyric in a beloved Christmas song ("Last Christmas" by George Michael) does not a good Christmas movie make.
从最近这部由艾米莉亚克拉克和亨利戈尔丁主演的 rom-com 中吸取教训，这两个人类体现了温暖和模糊的感觉，由同样迷人的艾玛汤普森编写？一首心爱的圣诞歌曲（乔治迈克尔的“去年圣诞节” ）中的歌词并不是一部好的圣诞电影。
Choice Review: "It's the kind of bad that falls somewhere between finding a lump of coal in your stocking and discovering one painfully lodged in your rectum."
选择评论：“这是一种介于在你的袜子里发现一块煤和发现一个痛苦地卡在你的直肠之间的坏事。”
Deck the Halls
装饰大厅
If you like your Christmas movies with some cranky men and a lot of mean-spirited hijinks and very little charm, this comedy starring Matthew Broderick and Danny DeVito is for you, ya Grinch.
如果你喜欢你的圣诞电影中有一些脾气暴躁的男人和很多卑鄙的恶作剧而且很少有魅力，那么这部由马修布罗德里克和丹尼德维托主演的喜剧就是给你的，你是格林奇。
Choice Review: "You cannot believe how excruciatingly awful this movie is. It is bad in a way that will cause unfortunate viewers to huddle in the lobby afterward, hugging in small groups, consoling one another with the knowledge that it's over, it's over—thank God, it's over."
Choice 评论：“你无法相信这部电影有多么糟糕。它的糟糕程度会导致不幸的观众事后挤在大厅里，三五成群地拥抱，互相安慰，知道它结束了，它结束了——感谢上帝，一切都结束了。”
The Nutcracker and the Four Realms
胡桃夹子和四个王国
Um, at least Keira Knightley seemed to be having fun in this colorful, wild and wackadoodle reimagination of The Nutcracker? Despite (very) early hype, The Nutcracker and the Four Realms became one of the biggest box office bombs of 2018.
嗯，至少凯拉奈特莉似乎在胡桃夹子的这个多彩，狂野和怪诞的重新想象中很有趣？尽管（非常）早期炒作，胡桃夹子和四个王国成为 2018 年最大的票房炸弹之一。
Choice Review: "What in the cuckoo Christmas blasphemy is this?"
选择评论：“布谷鸟圣诞节的亵渎是什么？”
Four Christmases
四个圣诞节
On paper, this movie sounds great: America's sweetheart Reese Witherspoon and America's wise-ass Vince Vaughn as a couple having to visit four messy, complicated and inappropriate families on Christmas. But this rom-com-gone-wrong proved to be riddled with clichés and felt staler than your Aunt Karen's fruitcake.
从表面上看，这部电影听起来很棒：美国的甜心瑞茜·威瑟斯彭和美国的聪明人文斯·沃恩作为一对夫妇不得不在圣诞节拜访四个凌乱、复杂和不合适的家庭。但事实证明，这部 rom-com-gone-wrong 充满了陈词滥调，而且感觉比你凯伦阿姨的水果蛋糕还陈旧。
Choice Review: "It's Four Christmases in need of a wedding, or maybe a funeral."
选择评论：“这是四个圣诞节，需要一场婚礼，或者一场葬礼。
Fred Claus
弗雷德·克劳斯
And Vaughn is 0-for-2 when it comes to Christmas movies, with his 2007 comedy about Santa's cranky and bitter Scrooge of an older bro failing to earn many laughs...or money.
沃恩 (Vaughn) 在 2007 年的圣诞电影中是 0 比 2 的喜剧，讲述了圣诞老人脾气暴躁、苦涩的守财奴（Scrooge）和一个年长的兄弟未能赢得很多笑声……或金钱。
Choice Review: "The movie is less ho-ho-ho than uh-oh, or oh-no."
选择评论：“这部电影不像呃哦，或者哦不。”
Jack Frost
杰克弗罗斯特
Imagine a Christmas movie about a dead father (who died on Christmas Day, by the way, after always traveling for work and not really being present with his family) returning to his son as a snowman who came to life one day. Now imagine thinking that is not a horror movie. Alas, filmmakers believed this was the feel-good family film the world needed, with Michael Keaton starring as the dead-dad-turned-snowman. 1998, man, what a year.
想象一部关于一位死去的父亲（顺便说一下，他在圣诞节那天去世的圣诞电影，在他总是出差而不是真正与家人在一起之后）回到他的儿子身边，变成了有一天复活的雪人。现在想象一下，这不是一部恐怖电影。 las，电影制作人认为这是世界需要的感觉良好的家庭电影，迈克尔基顿主演了死去的父亲变成的雪人。 1998，伙计，多么美好的一年。
Christmas With the Kranks
与克兰克斯一起过圣诞节
While Tim Allen proved to have the holiday spirit with his blockbuster Santa Clause trilogy, the magic wore off for this 2004 family comedy. The concept was simple enough: The Home Improvement star and Jamie Lee Curtis play a couple frantically trying to put together a Christmas event in less than 24 hours after their adult daughter reveals she's going to be returning home after all. Alas, despite Allen and Curtis' comedic talents, there was no salvaging this hammy and clunky Christmas mess and it has the 5 percent Rotten Tomatoes rating to prove it.
蒂姆·艾伦 (Tim Allen) 凭借他的轰动一时的圣诞老人三部曲证明了自己的节日精神，但这部 2004 年的家庭喜剧的魔力逐渐消退。这个概念很简单：家装明星和杰米·李·柯蒂斯扮演一对夫妇，在他们成年的女儿透露她毕竟要回家后不到 24 小时内疯狂地试图组织一个圣诞节活动。唉，尽管艾伦和柯蒂斯有喜剧天赋，但还是没有挽救这个笨拙笨拙的圣诞节烂摊子，它有 5% 的烂番茄评级来证明这一点。
Choice Review: "Stinks like the unrefrigerated ham its studio sent me as a promotion several months ago."
Bad Santa 2
坏圣诞老人 2
Alternate title for this unnecessary and unfunny sequel to the surprise hit dark comedy starring Billy Bob Thornton? 2 Bad 4 Santa.
这部由比利·鲍伯·松顿主演的出人意料的热门黑色喜剧的续集的别名是什么？ 2坏4圣诞老人。
Choice Review: "We have long hoped that there might one day be a sequel. We need to be careful what we wish for."
选择评论：“我们一直希望有一天会有续集。我们需要小心我们的愿望。”
Love the Coopers
爱库珀
Nothing brings the family together during the holidays quite like divorce, right? Desperate for one last perfect Christmas as a fam, Diane Keaton and John Goodman play a couple planning to divorce just after their adult children visit for the holidays. We'll let you guess what happens. The movie wastes a majority of its stacked cast (Olivia Wilde, Anthony Mackie and Alan Arkin, oh my!) and just tries way too hard to hit you in your holiday feels. Example: A dog narrates the movie.
没有什么比离婚更能让家人在假期聚在一起了，对吧？黛安·基顿 (Diane Keaton) 和约翰·古德曼 (John Goodman) 扮演了一对夫妇，他们希望在成年子女来度假后就离婚，他们迫切希望一家人度过最后一个完美的圣诞节。我们会让你猜会发生什么。这部电影浪费了大部分演员阵容（奥利维亚·王尔德、安东尼·麦凯和艾伦·阿金，我的天哪！），而且太过努力地想在你的假期中打动你。示例：一只狗在讲述电影。
Miracle on 34th Street
第 34 街的奇迹
OK, here's the thing: the 1994 remake isn't a bad movie, it's just a completely unnecessary one. Starring Richard Attenborough, Dylan McDermott, Elizabeth Perkins and Mara Wilson, it doesn't really add anything new or special, which is obvious as the original 1947 still tends to get more airplay all these years later.
好吧，事情是这样的：1994 年的翻拍版并不是一部糟糕的电影，它只是一部完全没有必要的电影。由 Richard Attenborough、Dylan McDermott、Elizabeth Perkins 和 Mara Wilson 主演，它并没有真正添加任何新的或特别的东西，这是显而易见的，因为这些年之后，最初的 1947 年仍然有更多的播放机会。
Choice Review: "The movie's a slow-moving, overblown, never-better-than-competent rendition of the original."
选择评论：“这部电影是对原著的缓慢、夸张、再好不过的演绎。”
A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding
圣诞王子：皇家婚礼
Before you argue, let the record state that we thoroughly enjoyed the first film in the A Christmas Prince franchise (We cannot believe that is an actual thing, but here we are!) for how deliciously low-budget and unintentionally hilarious it was. There's a reason it became an unexpected meme-generator and developed a cult fanbase. HOWEVER, the 2018 sequel was so-bad-it's-bad, not so-bad-it's-good. The Netflix rom-com was lackluster, half-assed and, worst of all, BORING. Therefore we banished it from our queue..
在你争论之前，让记录表明我们非常享受圣诞王子系列中的第一部电影（我们不敢相信这是真实的，但我们就是这样！）因为它是多么美味的低预算和无意中的搞笑。它成为意想不到的模因生成器并发展出狂热的粉丝群是有原因的。然而，2018 年的续集太糟糕了，但还算不错。 Netflix rom-com 乏善可陈，半途而废，最糟糕的是，很无聊。因此我们将它从我们的队列中删除了..
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