双语畅销书·怦然心动 Chapter 13 怦然心动
Chapter 13
怦然心动
那次晚餐之后，朱莉在学校对我很客气，这正是我所痛恨的。生气都比客气更好。
就连狂热都比……客气更好。对她来说，我就像个陌生人，上帝啊，这让我非常困扰。极其、极其的困扰。
然后轮到拍卖会的事情，我发现自己正在陷入更大的麻烦。
拍卖会是“推进者俱乐部”假装用来为学校筹款的方式。他们坚称被选中是一种荣誉，但鬼才相信呢！
基本情况是这样的，他们会强行扣留二十个男生，他们每人自带美妙的野餐食品，当着全校学生的面，由女生竞标与之共进午餐的权利。
猜猜今年谁是那二十人之一。
你以为妈妈们会说，嘿，你们不能把我儿子拿去拍卖，那你就错了。她们反而很骄傲自己的儿子被选为“午餐篮男孩”。
没错，朋友，那就是他们给你起的名字。一年一度的校庆活动上，你总能听到这样的话：“今天午餐时间，所有新入选的‘篮子男孩’请到多功能厅参加筹备会议。所有‘篮子男孩’必须参加。”
很快就没人叫你的真名了。别人只把你和其他十九个傻瓜看作“篮子男孩”。
当然，我妈妈非常投入，她给我的篮子里装满了各色食品，以确保我得到最高的出价。我解释说，自己根本不想进入梅菲尔德初级中学的“篮子男孩”名人堂，而且说真的，篮子放了什么根本不是重点。姑娘们才不是为了那个篮子竞标呢。你亲身经历过，就知道那是个人肉市场。
“你在学校吃顿午饭，这件事就结束了。那不是人肉市场，布莱斯。那是种荣誉！再说，也许真有好心的姑娘为你出价，你还能交到一个新朋友呢！”
妈妈们就这样出卖了我们。
然后是加利特，他悄悄地告诉我，雪莉·斯道尔斯已经和米奇·麦克森分手了，她、米兰达·休姆斯和珍妮·阿特金森之间为了竞投我展开了一场激烈的斗争。“哥们儿！”他告诉我说，“全校最热门的两个妞儿。我对天发誓，雪莉是因为你才抛弃了米奇。是夏丽尔亲口告诉我的，八卦女王夏丽尔。”他向我露出猥亵的笑容，“我嘛，我支持胖妞珍妮。做一个‘篮子男孩’，你活该得到这样的待遇。”
我让他闭嘴，不过他说得对。我的运气用完了，也许我是活该被胖妞珍妮缠上。我能想象得出来——身高一米八的胖姑娘吃完我带的全部午餐食品，然后跟着我到处跑。珍妮是全校唯一一个能扣篮的女孩。当她落地的时候，整个场地都在震动。要是她没有那些……你明白……女生的特征，她完全可以剃掉头发，加入NBA（美国男篮职业联赛）。
真的，没人怀疑过。
她的父母满足她的每一个要求。传说，为了她，他们把家里的车库改造成了一个全尺寸的篮球场。
这意味着，在“篮子男孩”的游戏中，她对我也是稳操胜券了。
除非，除非雪莉或者米兰达出了更高的价钱。但我怎么能保证呢？
我的大脑飞速运转，想制订一个计划，最后我发现，只有一个可行的方法。
同时讨好她们俩。
第一天实施我的计划，我觉得自己无比卑鄙。我并没有做什么太糟糕的事。我只是，嗯，表示了友好。虽然我不知道雪莉和米兰达是否看出了我的意图，但加利特看出来了。
“哥们儿！”星期四的时候，他对我说，“我能看穿你的小把戏，兄弟。”
“你在说什么？”
“别否认了，哥们儿。你在同时对付她们俩。”他凑过来，在我耳边说，“不管你是不是‘篮子男孩’，我都佩服你。”
“闭嘴，哥们儿。”
“真的！八卦女王说，今天的体育课上，她俩厮打起来了。”
我必须了解这件事：“那么……胖妞珍妮呢？”
他耸耸肩：“不清楚。不过我们明天就知道了，对不对，哥们儿？”
星期五，妈妈把我和我那傻乎乎的超大号野餐篮一起送到学校，由于所有“篮子男孩”都要盛装打扮，我系了一条让人窒息的领带，穿了西裤和礼服鞋，感觉自己是个十足的傻瓜。
当我走过甬道的时候，学生们吹着口哨，朝我喊：“哦，宝贝！”这时胖妞珍妮超过我，一步便迈上三个台阶。
“哦，布莱斯，”她回过头说，“你看起来……很美味。”
上帝啊！我跑步进入教室，那是全体“篮子男孩”集合的地方，进门的那一刻，我感觉好多了，我的身边围绕着其他傻瓜，他们似乎真心高兴看到我的出现。“嗨，罗斯基”；“哟，哥们儿”；“这样难道不是很蠢吗”；“你怎么不坐校车，兄弟”——这群同病相怜的人哪。
推进者俱乐部主席麦克卢尔夫人走进教室，就是她把我们圈到这里的。“哦，上帝啊！”她说，“你们看上去全都那么帅！”
没有一句话提到我们的篮子，也不想事先往里面看一眼。不，她唯一关心的是，那些小妞饿了。
人肉市场？
一点儿也没错！
“别紧张，孩子们，”麦克卢尔夫人说，“你们会度过美妙的一天！”她拿出一张名单，让我们排成一列。我们被编上号码，篮子也被编上号码。出于她的愚蠢要求，我们填写了一张卡片。等到她把我们整顿完毕，保证我们知道该做什么不该做什么，已经错过了第一堂课和第二堂课的一半多。“好了，先生们，”她说，“把你们的篮子留在原地，然后去……现在几点了？还在上第二堂课？”她看了看表，“是的，第二堂。”
“要是老师跟我们要假条怎么办？”某位聪明的“篮子男孩”问。
“你们的老师手里有个名单。如果他们有问题，告诉他们，你们的领结就是假条。当每个人都完成拍卖之后，我在这里等着你们。明白了吗？那就快行动吧！”
我们抱怨着，然后走回教室。我敢保证，整个上午，我们二十个人里没有一个人听进去了老师讲的内容。假如你的脖子上缠着套索、脚趾被挤得生疼，屋子里坐满了一群准备猎捕你的白痴，你怎么能听得进去？
任何一个提出这种傻瓜传统的人，都该被塞进篮子，扔进河里，连勺子都不准拿。
我是九号“篮子男孩”。这意味着我要在篮球馆的舞台上站很久，等待几乎一半的男孩被拍卖掉。最少十元起拍。如果没人竞标，私下里总有一个老师被安排好为你出价。
是的，朋友，你有无数种被羞辱的可能。
一些妈妈也出现了，她们站在一边，带着摄像机或照相机，坐立不安，向儿子挥手，基本上跟她们的儿子看上去一样蠢。我应该想到的。妈妈请了一个小时的假，也出现在人群中。
提姆·派罗是五号“篮子男孩”，他妈妈真的为他竞标了。没开玩笑。她上蹿下跳，喊着“二十！我给你二十元！”上帝，这真是终生难忘。幸运的是，凯莉·特洛特为他叫了二十二元五角，让他免于内疚地因为“妈妈的乖宝贝”而困扰——这是世上少有的比成为“篮子男孩”更糟的事。
凯莱布·休斯是下一个拍卖品，他为俱乐部拍得了十一元五角。然后是查得·奥蒙德，我敢说麦克卢尔夫人把他带上去的时候他都快尿裤子了。她宣读他的卡片，捏捏他的脸，然后迅速地拍出了十五元。
这时，我和拍卖台只隔着琼恩·楚洛克。我对他篮子装了什么东西、有什么爱好、喜欢什么运动不感兴趣。我忙着在人群中寻找胖妞珍妮，胳肢窝里湿了一片。
麦克卢尔夫人透过麦克风喊道：“有出十元的吗？”我等了一分钟，却没有人说出“十元！”谁也没有说话。“来啊，快上吧！这午餐很好吃呢。草莓挞，嗯……”麦克卢尔夫人走到后面，宣读琼恩·楚洛克那张卡片上写的菜单。
多么尴尬啊！这比成为“妈妈的宝贝”还要更糟。比跟胖妞珍妮共进午餐还要糟！如果没人想跟他共进午餐，为什么会选他当上“篮子男孩”呢？
人群右侧传来声音：“十元！”
“十元？有人出十元吗？”麦克卢尔夫人露出紧张的笑容。
“十二！”从同一片区域传出另一个声音。
第一个声音又喊道：“十五！”忽然，我认出那个声音的主人了。
朱莉安娜·贝克。
我扫视着人群，最后看到她高高地挥着手，兴奋之情溢于言表。
“十六！”另一个声音说。
安静片刻，朱莉的声音再次响起：“十八！”
“十八！”麦克卢尔夫人喊道，她看上去快要因为解脱而晕倒了。她顿了一下，然后说，“十八元一次……十八元两次……成交！十八元。”
卖给朱莉？我完全没想到她会参与午餐竞拍。任何一个人的午餐。
琼恩走回队伍当中。我知道是该我走上去的时候了，可我一步也挪不动。像是有人在我肚子上狠狠打了一拳。朱莉喜欢琼恩吗？这是不是她最近这么……这么……客气的原因？因为再也不在乎我了？她从来都在那里，等着被我躲开，而现在我甚至就像不存在一样。
“上前一步，布莱斯。来呀，别害羞！”
麦克·阿比尼多轻轻地推了我一把：“该你受罪了。上去吧！”
就像走向断头台一样。我站在前面，满身大汗，听俱乐部女王检查我的午餐，并逐条宣读我的兴趣爱好。她还没说完，雪莉·斯道尔斯就喊道：“十元！”
“什么？”麦克卢尔夫人说。
“我出十元！”
“哦，”她把字条放下，笑了，“好吧，我听到有人出价十元！”
“二十！”米兰达·休姆斯站在人群正中央喊道。
“二十五！”又是雪莉。
我搜索胖妞珍妮的身影，祈祷她生病回家了或是遇到别的问题，这时雪莉和米兰达正在五元五元地加价。“三十！”
“三十五！”
“四十！”
我找到她了。她站在米兰达身后二十码的地方，正在用牙齿清理她的指甲油。
“四十五！”
“五十！”
“五十二。”
“五十二？”俱乐部女王打断她们，“哇，竞争很激烈！看看篮子就知道，这很值得——”
“六十！”
“六十二！”雪莉喊。
米兰达慌忙向朋友借钱，这时麦克卢尔喊：“一次！”但珍妮站了起来，喘着粗气说：“一百元！”
一百元。只听观众们倒吸一口凉气，所有人都转过身，盯着珍妮。
“好！”麦克卢尔夫人笑了，“一百元！毫无疑问，这是有史以来的最高纪录。也是对推进者俱乐部的慷慨馈赠！”
我好想把她推下舞台。我已经被宣判了。这将是终生难忘的经历。
台下一片骚乱，忽然，雪莉和米兰达站在一起喊道：“一百二十二……块五！我们出一百二十二块五！”
“一百二十二元零五角？”我想俱乐部女王快要跳起波尔卡舞了，“你们合并了彼此的资源，想跟这位优秀的小伙子共进午餐？”
“是的！”她们叫道，然后把目光投向珍妮。人人都在看着珍妮。珍妮只是耸耸肩，然后继续抠她的指甲去了。
“好吧，就这样！一百二十二元零五角一次……一百二十二元零五角两次……成交，这两位美丽的年轻姑娘以一百二十二元零五角的价格创造了前所未有的纪录！”
“哥们儿！”我退回队列之后，麦克对我耳语，“雪莉和米兰达两个人？这让我怎么追得上？”
他甚至都没有接近这个数字。他被泰瑞·诺里斯以十六元成交，余下的大多数人都拍出了四十元。结束的时候，每个男生都跟我说：“哥们儿！你真厉害……创造纪录！”但我一点儿都不觉得自己厉害，我已经筋疲力尽了。
妈妈走过来给我一个拥吻，就像我得了金牌似的，低声说“我的小宝贝”，然后咔嗒咔嗒踩着高跟鞋回去上班了。
我又累又尴尬，然后就被雪莉和米兰达拽进了多功能厅。推进者俱乐部在多功能厅摆了一些供两人使用的小桌子，用明暗不同的粉色、蓝色和黄色装饰着，到处都是气球和飘带。我觉得自己就像只复活节的兔子，双手抓着愚蠢的“篮子男孩”的午餐，被米兰达拉住一只胳膊，雪莉抱紧另外一只。
他们把最大的一张桌子给了我们，又多拿来一把椅子，当我们都坐下后，麦克卢尔夫人说：“男孩和女孩们，我想我不需要提醒你们，接下来的课可以不用上了。享受你们的午餐，享受你们的友谊……慢慢吃，放松点儿，再次感谢你们对推进者俱乐部的支持。没有你们，就没有今天的我们！”
于是，我坐在那里，跟全校最抢手的两个姑娘一起共进午餐。我是那个遭到全校男生妒忌的人。
老兄，我都痛苦死了。
我是说，这两个姑娘也许很漂亮，但她们聊起胖妞珍妮的时候，那些话真是令人发指。米兰达说道：“她在想些什么？她还以为你盼着约她出去呢，是不是，布莱斯？”
好吧，没错，是这样。可是把它说出来本身就是错的。“听着，我们能不能聊点别的？”
“没问题，比如说？”
“无所谓，什么都行。你们这个暑假打算去哪儿玩？”
米兰达先开口：“我们要坐游轮去墨西哥的蔚蓝海岸，停靠在每一个好玩的港口，购物什么的，”她冲我眨了眨眼，“我可以给你带点礼物回来……”
雪莉挪了一下椅子，说：“我们要去湖边玩。我爸爸在那里有座小木屋，在那儿你能晒出一身最美丽的古铜色。你还记得我去年开学时的样子吗？那时候我，嗯，很黑。我想再来一次，不过这回我要制定一张时间表，这样就能把每一寸皮肤都晒到。”她咯咯笑着说，“别告诉我妈妈，好吗？否则她肯定会阻止我！”
从这时开始，她们为美黑的问题争执起来。米兰达告诉雪莉，去年开学的时候她根本没注意到她晒黑了，而晒太阳最好的地方是在游轮甲板上。雪莉告诉米兰达，任何一个长着雀斑的人都不可能真正晒黑，由于米兰达全身都有雀斑，坐游轮肯定是一种浪费。我吞下属于我那三分之一的午餐，环视着房间，试图让她们的对话从耳边流过。
然后，我看到了朱莉。她和我隔着两张桌子，正对着我的方向，可她并没有看我。她看着琼恩，她的眼睛闪闪发光，她在笑。
我的心跳慢了一拍。她在笑什么？他们在聊什么？她坐在那儿，怎么那么……美？
我觉得自己渐渐失去了控制。这感觉很奇怪，就像不能控制自己的肢体一样。我一直觉得琼恩很酷，但现在我只想走过去，把他扔出屋子。
雪莉抓住我的胳膊：“布莱斯，你还好吗？你看起来……我不知道……像着了魔似的。”
“什么？哦。”我试着做了个深呼吸。“你在看什么？”米兰达问。她俩都从我肩膀上面看过去，然后耸耸肩，继续挑拣着食物。
可我不能自已地再次看了过去。内心深处，我听见外公在对我说：“你现在作出的选择将会影响你的一生。作出正确的选择……”
作出正确的选择……
作出正确的选择……
作出正确的选择……
米兰达再一次摇晃我的胳膊，问道：“布莱斯？你听见我说话了吗？我问你今年暑假打算干点什么？”
“我不知道。”我坚持不住了。
“嘿，也许你可以跟我们在湖边住一段时间！”雪莉建议道。
这真是一种折磨。我想大声尖叫，闭嘴！让我一个人待一会儿！我想从这栋房子里跑出去，一直跑，一直跑，直到我没有知觉为止。
“午餐很美味，布莱斯。”米兰达的声音飘在我耳边，“布莱斯？你听见我说话了吗？这真是一顿丰盛的午餐。”
一句简单的谢谢就足够了。但我能用简单的谢谢来回答她吗？
不能。我转向她说：“除了食物、美黑和头发，我们能不能谈点别的？”
她朝我露出一个傲慢的微笑：“好吧，那么，你到底想聊点什么？”
我冲她眨眨眼，再冲雪莉眨眨眼：“永动机怎么样？知道永动机吗？”
“永……什么？”
米兰达笑了起来。
“怎么了？”我问她，“什么事这么高兴？”
她盯着我看了一分钟，然后吃吃地笑着：“我不敢相信自己竟然竞拍到一个知识分子。”
“嘿……我很聪明的！”
“真的吗？”米兰达笑着问，“你连‘知识分子’这个词都拼不出来吧？”
“他很聪明，米兰达。”
“哦，别再拍他马屁了，雪莉。你想说你是为了追求他的头脑？上帝，看你这样讨好他，我真想吐！”
“讨好？你再说一遍？”
“你听见我说了。反正他不会邀请你参加毕业舞会的，所以还是放弃吧，你说呢？”
这次午餐到此为止。妈妈做的一片苹果挞碾碎在米兰达的头发里，剩下的牧场风味酱涂在雪莉的头发上。
麦克卢尔夫人还来不及说“看在推进者的分儿上，你们在干吗”，她俩就在地上滚作一团，抓花了对方的脸。
趁这个机会，我离开座位，朝朱莉走去。我抓住她的手说：“我必须跟你谈谈。”
她从椅子上欠起身：“什么？怎么了，布莱斯？她们为什么打架？”
“抱歉，我们离开一会儿，好吗，琼恩？”我拉着她离开桌子，但是没有地方可去。拉着她的手，我根本无法思考。于是，我停在屋子的正中间，看着她。看着她的脸。我想摸摸她的脸颊，看看那是什么感觉。我想摸摸她的头发，它看起来难以置信地柔顺。
“布莱斯，”她轻声说，“出什么事了？”
我开口问她的时候，几乎要窒息了：“你喜欢他？”
“我……你是说琼恩？”
“是的！”
“哦，当然。他是个好人，而且——”
“不，你喜欢他吗？”我的心脏快要跳出胸膛了，我拉起她的另一只手，等待她的答案。
“嗯，不是。我是说，不是那种……”
不是！她说不是！我不管此刻我身在何处，也不管有谁在看。我想要，我不得不亲吻她。我倾身向前，闭上眼睛，然后……
她从我身边挣脱了。
突然间，屋子里死一般的沉寂。米兰达和雪莉透过她们湿滑的头发瞪着我，人人都在看着，就好像我是个短路的机器人，我只是站在那儿，试图闭上嘴巴，恢复平时的样子。
麦克卢尔夫人扶着我的肩膀，带我回到座位上，对我说：“你坐下，待在这儿！”然后她把米兰达和雪莉拖出去，教训了一顿，让她们在她找门卫来收拾这堆烂摊子之前各自找个浴室清理干净。
我一个人坐在那里，根本没考虑过掩饰自己。我只想和她在一起，和她说话，再一次拉着她的手。
吻她。
放学之前，我试着跟她说话，但每次不等我走近，她就躲开了。
最后一节课的下课铃响了起来，她消失了。
我到处找她，但她就是不见踪影。
不过，加利特还在。他追上我说：“哥们儿！告诉我这不是真的！”
我什么也没说。我朝自行车棚走去，希望能在那儿找到朱莉。
“哦，上帝……是真的！”
“别来烦我，加利特。”
“你有机会跟学校里最抢手的两个妞混在一起，却为了朱莉放弃了她俩？”
“你不明白。”
“你说得对，哥们儿。我一点儿也不明白。你真的试图去吻她？我不敢相信。我们说的是朱莉安娜·贝克吗？你噩梦般的邻居？那个讨厌的万事通？鸡屎宝贝？”
我冷冷地停下来，推了他一把。只是两只手掐住他，然后推了他一把：“那是很久以前的事，哥们儿。少来这一套！”
加利特举起双手投降，但朝我凑过来：“哥们儿，你对她动心了，你知道吗？”
“让开点，行不行？”
他拦住我的去路：“我不相信！两个小时以前，你还是那个独一无二的人！‘那个人’！全校学生都愿意跪拜你！现在，看看你自己吧。你就像，嗯，一个社会公害。”他轻哼一声，“还有，哥们儿，事实上，如果你还是这副德行，我不想继续跟你做朋友了。”
我指着他的鼻子说：“很好！你知道吗？我也不想！”
我把他推到一边，跑了。
我是走回家的。穿着挤脚的皮鞋，脏碟子在黏糊糊的野餐篮里叮当作响，“篮子男孩”一路跋涉回到了家。
而我的内心世界正进行着一场激烈的斗争。过去的布莱斯想要回到从前，想和加利特一起闲扯，想把朱莉安娜·贝克继续恨下去。
想成为“那个人”。
但在我的潜意识里，过去的布莱斯已经死了，我已经无法回头。对加利特、雪莉、米兰达，以及任何一个不了解我的人。朱莉和他们不一样，但这么多年过去了，我已经不在乎这些了。
我喜欢这样。
我喜欢她。
每次我看到她，她似乎都变得更漂亮，她仿佛散发着光彩。我指的不是像一百瓦的灯泡那样发光，她只是具有了同样的温暖。也许是因为爬树，也许是因为给小鸡唱歌，也许是因为敲着木桩，梦想着永动机，我不知道。我知道，和她相比，雪莉和米兰达都显得太……普通了。
我从来没有过这样的感觉，从来没有。承认它，而不是隐瞒它，让我感到自己充满力量与幸福。我脱掉鞋袜，把它们也放进篮子，光脚向家里跑去，领带搭在我的肩膀上，我忽然明白了加利特那天晚上说的一句话——我心动了。
彻彻底底地心动了。
走在我家那条街，我发现她的自行车靠在路旁。她在家！
我一直按着门铃，时间长得让我以为它坏掉了。
没有人开门。
我捶打着大门。
没有人开门。
我回到家，拨通了电话，很久很久以后，终于，她妈妈接了起来。“布莱斯？不，我很抱歉。她不想和你说话，”她轻声说，“给她一点儿时间，好吗？”
我给了她将近一个小时的时间。然后，我穿过马路：“求你了，贝克太太。我非要见到她不可！”
“她把自己锁在房间里不愿出来，亲爱的。你可以试试明天再给她打电话。”
明天？我等不到明天！于是，我在她家附近逡巡着，爬上围栏，敲着她房间的窗户：“朱莉！朱莉，拜托。我必须要见到你。”
她的窗帘紧闭，但后门打开了，贝克太太走出来，把我轰走了。
到家以后，外公已经等在门口：“布莱斯，怎么了？你在贝克家那里跑来跑去，还爬上人家的围栏……就像火烧屁股似的！”
我脱口而出：“我不相信！我就是不相信！她不愿意跟我说话！”
他把我领进门厅，说：“谁不愿意跟你说话？”
“朱莉！”
他沉吟着：“她是不是……生你的气？”
“我不知道！”
“她有没有对你生气的理由？”
“没有！有！我是说，我不知道！”
“好吧，发生什么事了？”
“我试着亲她来着！当着一屋子人的面，当时我正跟雪莉和米兰达在一起，作为那个傻乎乎的‘篮子男孩’陪她们吃午餐，然后我试着去亲她了！”
慢慢地，他的脸上浮出一个笑容：“你这么做了？”
“我就像着了魔似的。我控制不住！但是她把我推开了，还……”我透过窗户望着贝克家的房子，“现在她不肯跟我说话了！”
外公开口了，声音很轻很轻：“也许她以为这只是一时冲动？”
“可我不是一时冲动！”
“不是吗？”
“不，我是说……”我转向他，“都是从那篇该死的报道开始的。我不知道……从那时开始，我就变得很奇怪。她的样子变了，她的声音变了，对我来说她甚至变了一个人！”我盯着窗外，“她……她只是变得不一样了。”
外公站在我身后，和我一起望着对街。“不，布莱斯。”他轻声说。
“她跟原来一样，是你变了。”他拍拍我的肩膀，在我耳边说道，“还有，孩子，从现在开始，你再也不是过去的你了。”
也许外公为此感到高兴，可我就惨了。我吃不下饭，看不进电视，几乎什么事都做不成。
于是，我早早爬到床上，却也睡不着。我从窗户盯着她家的房子，已经看了好几个小时了。我看过天空，也数过羊。但是，我就是忍不住后悔自己这些年来竟然这么傻。
现在，我怎么才能让她听我说话呢？只要她愿意，我可以去丈量那棵巨大的无花果树，从树根到树梢；我可以喊她的名字，让声音飞过屋顶，让全世界都听到。
因为我对爬树是那么地一窍不通，所以我认定这说明我愿意做一切事情，换来她跟我说话；上帝，我愿意跟着她爬进沾满鸡屎的鸡笼，假如这能奏效；我愿意永远只骑自行车上学，穿过崎岖的道路，假如这能让我跟她在一起。
做点什么。我一定要做点什么，让她知道我变了。做点什么向她证明我觉悟了。
但是做什么呢？我怎么做才能让她知道，我不是她以为的那样？我怎么才能抹去我之前所做的一切，从头再来？
也许我做不到。也许这根本就不可能做到。不过，如果说我从朱莉安娜·贝克身上学到什么东西，那就是，我必须全心全意地去尝试。
不管结果如何，我知道外公说对了一件事。
我再也不是过去的我了。
Chapter 13
Flipped
BRYCE
After the dinner Juli was nice to me at school. Which I hated. Mad was better than nice. Gaga was better than ... nice. It was like I was a stranger to her, and man, it bugged me. Bugged me big-time.
Then the auction happened, and I found myself with even bigger problems.
The auction is this bogus way the Booster Club raises money for the school. They insist it's an honor to be chosen, but bull-stinkin'-loney to that! Bottom line is, twenty guys get shanghaied. They have to come up with fancy picnic lunches and then be humiliated in front of the whole school while girls bid to have lunch with them.
Guess who made this year's top twenty.
You'd think mothers would say, Hey, there's no way you're going to auction my son off to the highest bidder, but no. Instead, they're all flattered that their son's been elected a basket boy.
Yes, my friend, that's what they call you. Over the P.A. you hear stuff like, "There will be an organizational meeting of the newly elected basket boys in the MPR at lunch today. All basket boys must attend."
Pretty soon you've completely lost your name. You and nineteen other saps are known simply as Basket Boy.
My mom, of course, was into it, coming up with all sorts of stuff to put in my basket so I'd get the highest bid. I tried to explain that I didn't want to be in Mayfield Junior High's Basket Boy Hall of Fame, and that really, what was in the basket didn't matter. It wasn't like girls were bidding on the basket. When you got right down to it, this was a meat market.
You eat lunch on campus and that's the end of it. It is hardly a meat market, Bryce. It's an honor! Besides, maybe someone really nice will bid on you and you'll make a new friend!
Mothers can be in such denial.
And then Garrett bends my ear with the news that Shelly Stalls is breaking up with Mitch Michaelson, and that she, Miranda Humes, and Jenny Atkinson are starting some bidding war over me. "Dude!" he tells me. "The two hottest chicks on campus. And I swear to god, man, Shelly's dumped Mitch because of you. I heard it direct from Shagreer, and dude, Shagreer the Ear knows all." He throws me this nasty grin and says, "Me, I'm rooting for Jumbo Jenny. It would serve you right for being such a basket boy."
I told him to shut up, but he was right. With the way my luck was running, I'd probably get stuck with Jumbo Jenny. I could just see it —six feet of beefy babe downing both halves of my lunch and then coming after me. Jenny's the only girl or guy on campus who can dunk a basketball. The whole gym shakes when she lands. And since she's got no, you know... female parabolas, the girl could shave her head and make it in the NBA. Seriously. No one would ever suspect.
Her parents give her anything she wants, too. Rumor has it they converted their garage into a full-on basketball court just for her.
Which meant that in the game of the basket boys, I was as good as slam-dunked.
Unless, unless Shelly or Miranda was high bidder. But how could I make sure that happened? My brain went into overdrive, constructing a plan, and in the end I decided that there was only one sensible course of action.
Kiss up to both of them.
Halfway through my first day of doing this, I felt like a skunk. Not that I was being gross about it or anything. I was just, you know, friendly. And even though Shelly and Miranda didn't seem to smell a thing, Garrett did.
Dude! he says to me on Thursday. "I can see your game, man."
What are you talking about?
Don't deny it, dude. You're working them both. He comes up and whispers in my ear, "Basket boy or not, I'm in awe."
Shut up, man.
Seriously! The Ear says they were, like, clawing each other in P.E. today.
I had to know. "What about ... Jumbo Jenny?"
He shrugs. "Haven't heard. But we'll find out tomorrow, won't we, dude?"
My mother dropped me off at school on Friday with my stupid oversized picnic basket, and since all basket boys have to dress up, I was choking in a tie and feeling completely dweeb like in slacks and dress shoes.
Kids whistled and shouted, "Oooh, baby!"as I headed up the walkway, and then Jumbo Jenny passed me, taking the front steps three at a time. "Wow, Bryce," she said over her shoulder. "You look...delicious."
Oh, man! I practically ran to the classroom where all the basket boys were supposed to meet, and the minute I walked in, I felt better. I was surrounded by other dweebs, who seemed genuinely happy to see me. "Hey, Loski"; "Yo, dude"; "Doesn't this suck eggs?"; "Why didn't you take the bus, man?"
Misery loves company.
Then Mrs. McClure, the president of the Boosters, the lady who lassoed us all, hoofs it through the door. "Oh, my!" she says. "You all look so handsome!"
Not one word about our baskets. Not one little sneak peek inside. No, for all she cared, those puppies were empty.
Meat market?
You better believe it!
Don't be so nervous, boys, Mrs. McClure was saying. "You're going to have a wonderful day!" She pulls out a list of names and starts ordering us into line. We get numbers; our baskets get numbers; we fill out three-by-five cards to her insane specifications; and by the time she's got us all organized and is sure we know what to do and what not to do, we've missed all of first and most of second period. "Okay, gentlemen," she says. "Leave your baskets where they are and go to... where are we now? Still in second?" She looks at the clock. "Right. Second."
What about passes? some sensible basket boy asked.
Your teachers have a list. But if they say anything, tell them I say your neckties are your passes. I'll meet you back here when everyone's dismissed for the auction. Got it? Don't dawdle!
We grumbled, Yeah, yeah, and headed to class. And I can tell you this, not one of the twenty of us listened to a word any of our teachers said that morning. How can you listen with a noose around your neck, pinched toes, and a room full of idiots thinking it's open season on basket boys? Whoever started this stupid tradition ought to be crammed into a basket and tossed downstream without a serving spoon.
I was basket boy number nine. Which meant I had to stand there on the stage in the gym while nearly half the guys got auctioned off. Minimum bid, ten bucks. And if nobody bid, the secret was a teacher
was assigned to bid on you.
Yes, my friend, the possibilities for mortification were infinite.
Some of the moms showed up and stood off to the side with their camcorders and zoom lenses, fidgeting and waving and basically actingas dweeby as their sons looked. I should know. My mom took an hour off work to be one of them.
Tim Pello was basket boy number five, and his mom actually bid on him. No kidding. She jumped up and down, yelling, "Twenty! I'll give you twenty!" Man, that'll brand you for life. Lucky for Tim, Kelly Trott came up with twenty-two fifty and saved his sorry self from everlasting torture as a mama's boy — one of the few fates worse than basket boy.
Caleb Hughes was up next, and he fetched the Boosters all of eleven fifty. Then came Chad Ormonde, who I swear was ready to pee his pants when Mrs. McClure made him step forward. She read his card, pinched his cheeks, and raked in fifteen even.
At this point what stood between me and the auction block was Jon Trulock. And I wasn't exactly interested in what he had in his basket or what his hobbies and favorite sports were. I was too busy scanning the crowd for Jumbo Jenny, sweating my pitsoff.
Mrs. McClure calls into the microphone, "Do I hear ten?" and it took me a minute to tune in to the fact that no one said "Ten!" No one said anything. "Come on, out there! The lunch is delicious. Strawberry tarts, um ..." And Mrs. McClure goes back to reading off the three-by-five about Jon Trulock's lunch.
Talk about embarrassing! This was worse than being a mama's boy. Worse than lunch with Jumbo Jenny! How'd he get voted basket boy if nobody wanted to have lunch with him?
Then off to the right of the crowd I hear, "Ten!"
Ten? Did I hear ten? Mrs. McClure says with a fluttery smile. "Twelve!" came a different voice from the same area. The first voice came back with "Fifteen!" and all of a sudden I recognized whose voice it was.
Juli Baker's.
I searched through the crowd and found her, hand waving in the air, that look all over her face.
Sixteen! came the other voice.
There was a pause, but then Juli shoots back with "Eighteen!"
Eighteen! cries Mrs. McClure, who looks like she's about to collapse from relief. She pauses, then says, "Eighteen going once ... Eighteen going twice ... Sold! For eighteen dollars."
To Juli? She was the last person I expected to bid on a lunch. Anybody's lunch.
Jon staggered back into line. And I knew I was supposed to step forward, but I couldn't budge. I felt like I'd been slugged in the stomach. Did Juli like Jon? Is that why she'd been so... so... nice lately? Because she didn't care about me anymore? All my life she'd been there, waiting to be avoided, and now it was like I didn't even exist.
Step up, Bryce. Come on, don't be shy!
Mike Abenido shoved me a little and said, "Your turn for torture. Get up there!"
It felt like walking the plank. I just stood up fronts weating bullets while the Booster queen dissected my lunch and started running through my list of favorites. Before she's even finished, though, Shelly Stalls calls out, "Ten!"
What's that? says Mrs. McClure.
I'll give you ten!
Oh, she laughs as she puts down her notes. "Well, I guess I hear ten!"
Twenty! calls Miranda Humes from dead center.
Twenty-five! It's Shelly again.
I'm looking around for Jumbo Jenny, praying she's gone home sick or something, while Shelly and Miranda go up by fives. "Thirty!"
Thirty-five!
Forty!
Then I spot her. She's about twenty feet behind Miranda, cleaning her fingernails with her teeth.
Forty-five!
Fifty!
Fifty-two.
Fifty-two? interrupts the Booster queen. "Well, this has been lively! And from the looks of this basket, well worth the —"
Sixty!
Sixty-two! calls Shelly.
Miranda scrambles around trying to beg money off her friends as Mrs. McClure calls, "Going once!" But then Jenny stands up and bellows, "A hundred!"
A hundred. There's a collective gasp, and then the entire student body turns and stares at Jenny.
Well! laughs Mrs. McClure. "We have a hundred! That is certainly an all-time record. And such agenerous donation to the Boosters!"
I wanted to boost her, right off the stage. I was doomed. This was something I would never live down.
Then there's this big commotion, and all of a sudden Shelly and Miranda are standing right next to each other calling, "One-twenty-two... fifty! We'll give you one-twenty-two fifty!"
One hundred twenty-two dollars and fifty cents? I thought the Booster queen was gonna polka. "You're pooling your resources to have lunch with this fine young man?"
Yeah! they call, then look over Jenny's way. Everybody looks over Jenny's way.
Jenny just shrugs and goes back to cleaning a nail.
Well, then! One hundred twenty-two dollars and fifty cents going once... One hundred twenty-two dollars and fifty cents going twice...Sold to those two beautiful young ladies for an all-time record of one hundred twenty-two dollars and fifty cents!
Dude! Mike whispered when I got back in line. "Shelly and Miranda? How am I supposed to follow that?"
He didn't even come close. He got Terry Norris for sixteen bucks, and the most anyone else got was forty. And when it was over, all the guys told me, "Dude! You are, like, the man... Score!" but I didn't feel like the man. I felt wiped out.
My mom came up and gave me a hug and a kiss like I'd won a gold medal or something, then whispered, "My little baby," and clickity-clicked off in her high heels, back to work.
So I was wiped out, embarrassed, and then practically dragged to the multi-purpose room by Shelly and Miranda.
The Boosters had outfitted the MPR with little tables for two, all decorated in shades of pink and blue and yellow, with balloons and streamers everywhere. I felt like the Easter bunny with my stupid basket boy lunch clutched in both hands while Miranda held on to one arm and Shelly latched on to the other.
They gave us the biggest table and whisked in an extra chair, and when everyone was seated, Mrs. McClure said, "Boys and girls? I don't think I need to remind you that you are excused from class for the rest of the day. Enjoy your lunches, enjoy your friendships... Take your time, relax, and thanks again for supporting your Boosters. We wouldn't be us without you!"
So there I was, with the two hottest girls on campus, having lunch.I was "the man," the envy of every other guy in school.
Buddy, I was miserable.
I mean, these two girls may be gorgeous, but what was coming out of their mouths about Jumbo Jenny was embarrassingly ugly. Miranda works herself up to, "What was she thinking? Like you would ever want to go out with her, right, Bryce?"
Well, yeah. That was right. But it seemed really wrong to say so. "Look, can we talk about something else?"
Sure. Like what?
I don't care. Anything else. You guys going anywhere this summer?
Miranda shoots off first. "We're taking a cruise to the Mexican Riviera. We're supposed to stop in all these cool ports and shop and stuff." She flutters her eyelids at me and says, "I could bring you something back..."
Shelly scoots her chair in a little and says, "We're going up to the lake. My dad has a cabin there, and you can get the most outrageous tan.
Do you remember what I looked like at the beginning of this year? I was, like, black. I'm going to do that again, only this time I've got a schedule all worked out so that it's even every where." She giggles and says, "Don't tell my mom, okay? She would have a ka-nip!"
And this, my friend, i
