人生不设限·信任他人，组成梦幻团队

NINE Trust Others, More or Less

11岁时，有一次爸爸、妈妈带我到澳大利亚的黄金海岸。他们沿着海岸走，离开一会儿，我则是在靠近水边的沙堆里凉快一下，一面看着海浪，一面享受微风。为了不被晒伤，我用一件特大号的T恤盖住自己。

When I was eleven years old, my parents took me to the beach on Australia's Gold Coast. My mum and dad walked down the coast a bit, and I was just chillin' in the sand near the edge of the water, watching the waves and basking in the breeze. I covered up with an oversize T-shirt so I wouldn't get sunburned.

一位年轻女性走了过来，边靠近我边笑着说：“哇，真厉害。”

A young woman came walking along the beach, and as she approached, she smiled and said, "That's quite impressive!"

“你是指?”我问道。我晓得她应该不是在说我硕大的二头肌。

"What do you mean?" I asked, knowing that she wasn't referring to my huge biceps.

“你把两条腿埋起来花了多长时间?”她问。

"How long did it take you to bury your legs like that?" she said.

我明白了，原来她以为我把双腿藏在沙里头了。我决定恶作剧一下，继续演下去。

I realized that she thought I'd hidden my legs in the sand somehow. Feeling mischievous, I played along.

“哦，我可是挖了很久呢。”我说。

"Oh, I had to dig such a long time," I said.

她大笑，然后就走开了，但我知道她一定忍不住要再看一眼，所以我等着看好戏。果然，当她转过头临别一瞥时，我马上弹起来跳向水里。

She laughed and strolled by, but I knew she could not resist a second look so I waited. Sure enough, just as her head swiveled for a parting glance, I popped up and hopped toward the water.

她什么也没说，不过当她急匆匆地沿着海滩跑走时，踉跄了一下。

She didn't say anything, though she stumbled a bit as she scurried down the beach.

年纪还小时，这种时刻总会惹毛我，但慢慢地，我对他人有了更多耐心与谅解。就像那位女士一样，我学到了，有时候人们有的东西比你一开始以为的多，有时则比较少。

Sometimes as a boy I resented such moments, but eventually I came to be more patient and understanding of others. Like that woman, I've learned that sometimes there is more to people than you first suspect, and sometimes there is less.

有识人之明、与人相处、跟人交往、体会他人的感受、知道谁可以信赖，以及如何让自己值得信赖，这些对成功和快乐都很重要。缺乏与他人在互相了解及信任的基础上建立关系的能力，却能够成功，这样的人实在很少。我们需要的不只是亲密爱人，也需要良师益友、人生典范，以及认同并帮助我们完成梦想的支持者。

The art of reading people, relating to them, engaging with them, and stepping into their shoes, knowing whom to trust and how to be trustworthy is critical to your success and happiness. Few people succeed without the ability to build relationships based on mutual understanding and trust. We all need not just someone to love but also friends, mentors, role models, and supporters who buy into our dreams and help us achieve them.

要建立由最为你着想的支持者所组成的梦幻团队，你必须先挺他们，来证明你是值得信赖的。你怎么对待你的伙伴，你的伙伴就会怎么待你。如果你支持他们，鼓励他们，给他们最真诚的回馈，那你可以期待这些人也会如此对你，假如他们做不到，你就该去寻找愿意加入你团队的人了。

To build your Dream Team of supporters who have your best interests at heart, you must first prove yourself trustworthy by standing up for them. Your mates will treat you the way you treat them. If you invest in their success, support them, encourage them, and give them your honest feedback, you can expect them to do the same for you. If they don't, you should move on and find someone who wants to be on your team.

人天生喜欢与他人交往，但如果有些关系不符合你的期待，那可能是你对于如何与人互动，以及你在这些关系中投入和拿走些什么想得不够。你最可能犯的错误之一是在交朋友时，只谈论你自己——谈你的恐惧、你的挫败和让你开心的事。要赢得别人的友谊，你必须要深入了解他们，寻找共同的兴趣，以建立对彼此都有帮助的联结。

We are social by nature, but if your relationships aren't what you'd like them to be, you may not be giving enough thought to how you interact with others and what you put in and take out of your relationships. One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to try and win friends only by telling them about yourself: your fears, frustrations, and pleasures. The truth is that you win friends by learning about them and finding shared interests to build bonds that provide mutual benefi ts.

建立人际关系就像建立存款账户，如果你什么也没存进去，怎么能期望从里面领取出东西来!我们必须借此评估并检视怎样做才有效，怎样做没有用，来时时调整自己经营人际关系的技巧。

Building a relationship is like building a savings account; you can't expect to take anything out of it if you haven't put something into it. We all need to tune up our relationship skills from time to time by evaluating our approach to them and looking at what is working and what is not.