双语·没有女人的男人们 第三篇 似白象一般的山峦
- Hills Like White Elephants
- 第三篇 似白象一般的山峦
THE hills across the valley of the Ebro were long and white.On this side there was no shade and no trees and the station was between two lines of rails in the sun.Close against the side of the station there was the warm shadow of the building and a curtain, made of strings of bamboo beads, hung across the open door into the bar, to keep out fies.The American and the girl with him sat at a table in the shade, outside the building.It was very hot and the express from Barcelona would come in forty minutes.It stopped at this junction for two minutes and went on to Madrid.
“What should we drink?”the girl asked.She had taken off her hat and put it on the table.
“It's pretty hot，”the man said.
“Let's drink beer.”
“Dos cervezas，”the man said into the curtain.
“Big ones?”a woman asked from the doorway.
“Yes.Two big ones.”
The woman brought two glasses of beer and two felt pads.She put the felt pads and the beer glasses on the table and looked at the man and the girl.The girl was looking off at the line of hills.They were white in the sun and the country was brown and dry.
“They look like white elephants，”she said.
“I've never seen one.”The man drank his beer.
“No, you wouldn't have.”
“I might have，”the man said.“Just because you say I wouldn't have doesn't prove anything.”
The girl looked at the bead curtain.“They've painted something on it，”she said.“What does it say?”
“Anis del Toro.It's a drink.”
“Could we try it?”
The man called“Listen”through the curtain.The woman came out from the bar.
“Four reales.”
“We want two Anis del Toros.”
“With water?”
“Do you want it with water?”
“I don't know，”the girl said.“Is it good with water?”
“It's all right.”
“You want them with water?”asked the woman.
“Yes, with water.”
“It tastes like liquorice，”the girl said and put the glass down.
“That's the way with everything.”
“Yes，”said the girl.“Everything tastes of liquorice.Especially all the things you've waited so long for, like absinthe.”
“Oh, cut it out.”
“You started it，”the girl said.“I was being amused.I was having a fne time.”
“Well, let's try and have a fne time.”
“All right.I was trying.I said the mountains looked like white elephants.Wasn't that bright?”
“That was bright.”
“I wanted to try this new drink.That's all we do, isn't it—look at things and try new drinks?”
“I guess so.”
The girl looked across at the hills.
“They're lovely hills，”she said.“They don't really look like white elephants.I just meant the coloring of their skin through the trees.”
“Should we have another drink?”
“All right.”
The warm wind blew the bead curtain against the table.
“The beer's nice and cool，”the man said.
“It's lovely，”the girl said.
“It's really an awfully simple operation, Jig，”the man said.“It's not really an operation at all.”
The girl looked at the ground the table legs rested on.
“I know you wouldn't mind it, Jig.It's really not anything.It's just to let the air in.”
The girl did not say anything.
“I'll go with you and I'll stay with you all the time.They just let the air in and then it's all perfectly natural.”
“Then what will we do afterwards?”
“We'll be fne afterwards.Just like we were before.”
“What makes you think so?”
“That's the only thing that bothers us.It's the only thing that's made us unhappy.”
The girl looked at the bead curtain, put her hand out and took hold of two of the strings of beads.
“And you think then we'll be all right and be happy.”
“I know we will.You don't have to be afraid.I've known lots of people that have done it.”
“So have I，”said the girl.“And afterward they were all so happy.”
“Well，”the man said，“if you don't want to you don't have to.I wouldn't have you do it if you didn't want to.But I know it's perfectly simple.”
“And you really want to?”
“I think it's the best thing to do.But I don't want you to do it if you don't really want to.”
“And if I do it you'll be happy and things will be like they were and you'll love me?”
“I love you now.You know I love you.”
“I know.But if I do it, then it will be nice again if I say things are like white elephants, and you'll like it?”
“I'll love it.I love it now but I just can't think about it.You know how I get when I worry.”
“If I do it you won't ever worry?”
“I won't worry about that because it's perfectly simple.”
“Then I'll do it.Because I don't care about me.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don't care about me.”
“Well, I care about you.”
“Oh, yes.But I don't care about me.And I'll do it and then everything will be fne.”
“I don't want you to do it if you feel that way.”
The girl stood up and walked to the end of the station.Across, on the other side, were felds of grain and trees along the banks of the Ebro.Far away, beyond the river, were mountains.The shadow of a cloud moved across the feld of grain and she saw the river through the trees.
“And we could have all this，”she said.“And we could have everything and every day we make it more impossible.”
“What did you say?”
“I said we could have everything.”
“We can have everything.”
“No, we can't.”
“We can have the whole world.”
“No, we can't.”
“We can go everywhere.”
“No, we can't.It isn't ours any more.”
“It's ours.”
“No, it isn't.And once they take it away, you never get it back.”
“But they haven't taken it away.”
“We'll wait and see.”
“Come on back in the shade，”he said.“You mustn't feel that way.”
“I don't feel any way，”the girl said.“I just know things.”
“I don't want you to do anything that you don't want to do—”
“Nor that isn't good for me，”she said.“I know.Could we haveanother beer?”
“All right.But you've got to realize—”
“I realize，”the girl said.“Can't we maybe stop talking?”
They sat down at the table and the girl looked across at the hills on the dry side of the valley and the man looked at her and at the table.
“You've got to realize，”he said，“that I don't want you to do it if you don't want to.I'm perfectly willing to go through with it if it means anything to you.”
“Doesn't it mean anything to you?We could get along.”
“Of course it does.But I don't want anybody but you.I don't want anyone else.And I know it's perfectly simple.”
“Yes, you know it's perfectly simple.”
“It's all right for you to say that, but I do know it.”
“Would you do something for me now?”
“I'd do anything for you.”
“Would you please please please please please please please stop talking?”
He did not say anything but looked at the bags against the wall of the station.There were labels on them from all the hotels where they had spent nights.
“But I don't want you to，”he said，“I don't care anything about it.”
“I'll scream，”the girl said.
The woman came out through the curtains with two glasses of beer and put them down on the damp felt pads.“The train comes in fve minutes，”she said.
“What did she say?”asked the girl.
“That the train is coming in fve minutes.”
The girl smiled brightly at the woman, to thank her.
“I'd better take the bags over to the other side of the station，”the man said.She smiled at him.
“All right.Then come back and we'll fnish the beer.”
He picked up the two heavy bags and carried them around the station to the other tracks.Coming back, he walked through the bar-room, where people waiting for the train were drinking.He drank an Anis at the bar and looked at the people.They were all waiting reasonably for the train.He went out through the bead curtain.She was sitting at the table and smiled at him.
“Do you feel better?”he asked.
“I feel fne，”she said.“There's nothing wrong with me.I feel fne.”
埃布罗河[21]河谷对面的山脉连绵不断，泛着白色。河谷的这边没有树木，没有阴凉地，火车站夹在两条铁轨之间，暴露在阳光下。紧靠车站的这头，是投下温热阴影的建筑物。那儿的酒吧敞着门，门道挂着一扇门帘挡苍蝇，门帘上的珠子是用竹子制成的。一个美国人和一个女孩坐在外边建筑物阴影里的桌子旁。天气热得要命。从巴塞罗那来的快车四十分钟内到站，在本站停两分钟，然后开往马德里。
“喝点儿什么吧？”女孩问。她已经摘下帽子放在了桌子上。“这鬼天气可真热呀。”美国男子说。
“那就喝啤酒吧。”
“来两杯啤酒！[22]”男子冲着门帘里面喊道。
“大杯的吗？”一个女人站在门口问。
“是的，两大杯。”
女人送来了两杯啤酒和两个毛毡杯垫，将杯垫和酒放在桌上，看了一眼美国男子和女孩。女孩正在眺望远处的山脉。艳阳下，山脉泛着白光，而田野却一片干涸，呈棕褐色。
“那山脉看上去就似一群白象。”女孩说。
“我从没见过白象。”男子喝了口啤酒说。
“是啊，你不会见到的。”
“也许我见过。”男子说，“光凭你一句话，说明不了什么问题。”
女孩望了望珠帘，“帘子上画了什么东西。”她说，“上面写了什么？”
“大茴香酒[23]。是一种饮品。”
“我们能尝一尝吗？”
男子冲着珠帘里面喊：“来人！”女人从酒吧里走出来。
“一共是四个雷阿尔[24]。”
“再来两杯大茴香酒。”
“加水吗？”
“你要加水吗？”
“我也不知道。”女孩说，“加了水好喝吗？”
“还可以吧。”
“两杯都要加水吗？”女人问。
“嗯，加水吧。”
“喝起来有股甘草味。”女孩说着放下酒杯。
“这儿所有的东西都有这种味道。”
“是啊，”女孩说，“样样东西都有甘草味。尤其你日思夜想的东西，比如苦艾酒。”
“罢了，这种话就不要再说了。”
“是你自己开的头，”女孩说，“刚才我还挺开心、挺享受的。”
“好吧，那咱们就试着开开心心享受吧。”
“好的。我正试着呢。我说那些山峦看上去好像白象。难道这样的话题不开心吗？”
“是挺叫人开心的。”
“我还想尝一尝这种新饮料。咱们就做了这些事，不就是——看看周围的东西，尝尝新饮料吗？”
“我想是的。”
女孩又眺望对面的山峦。
“多么美丽的大山啊！”她说，“看上去并不像白象。我刚才只是说透过树木看那些山的颜色是白的。”
“再来一杯怎么样？”
“好的。”
一阵热风把珠帘吹得蹭到了他们的桌子。
“啤酒味道真好，冰凉冰凉的。”男子说。
“是挺不错的。”女孩说。
“这种手术太简单了，吉格，”男人说，“其实算不上什么手术。”
女孩低头看了看桌子腿周围的地面。
“我知道你不会往心里去的，吉格。这只是小事一桩，只需吸点儿氧气就行了。”[25]
女孩没吱声。
“我会跟你去的，始终守在你身边。他们只是叫你吸点儿氧，这事再自然不过了。”
“那么，以后该怎么办呢？”
“以后一定会把日子过得顺风顺水的，一如以往。”
“你为何如此肯定？”
“因为咱们所苦恼的就这么一件事，正是这一件事弄得你我心情不畅。”
女孩看看珠帘，伸手抓起珠帘上的两串珠子。
“你觉得然后一定能平安无事，大家都开开心心的？”
“我知道一定会这样的，你不必担心。据我所知，许多人都做过这种手术。”
“这我也知道。”女孩说，“手术过后，男人们倒是挺开心的。”
“好吧，”男子说，“你要是不愿意做，就不做了。我绝不会强迫你干自己不愿意的事情。不过，话又说回来，这种手术的确简单极了。”
“这果真是你的意愿？”
“我觉得这是上上策。不过，假如你真的不想做，我也不愿勉强你。”
“如果我做这次手术，你就会高兴，一切都会跟以前一样，你还会爱我，对不对？”
“我现在就爱着你，这你心里清楚。”
“是的，我清楚。但如果我做了手术，一切恢复了正常，我要是说山峦像白象之类的话，你会喜欢吗？”
“会喜欢的，现在就很喜欢。只不过现在不能想那事。你知道我一旦心烦会怎么样。”
“我做手术，你就不心烦了。”
“我不为这个心烦，因为这种手术简单极了。”
“好吧，那我就做吧，因为我对自己是不在乎的。”
“你这是什么意思？”
“我是说我是不在乎自己的。”
“可是我在乎。”
“哦，是的。不过，我是不在乎我自己的。我去做就是了，那时就一好百好了。”
“假如这是你的感受，那我可不愿让你去做。”
女孩站起身，走到了车站的尽头。铁轨的另一侧可以看到埃布罗河的河岸上阡陌纵横、绿树成荫。河对岸的远处则是起伏的群山。云影在田野中穿行。她的目光透过树木瞥见了埃布罗河。
“你我原本是可以纵情享受这一切的，”她说道，“可以拥有一切美好的感受。而现在，这些一天天变得愈加不可能实现了。”
“你说什么来着？”
“我说你我原本是可以拥有一切美好感受的。”
“现在也可以呀。”
“现在不行了，一切都成了镜花水月。”
“你我可以拥有整个世界。”
“现在不行了，一切都成了镜花水月。”
“咱们可以到任何地方去，走遍天涯海角。”
“现在不行了，一切都成了镜花水月。这个世界不再是我们的了。”
“是我们的！”
“已经不是了。一旦失去，就不再拥有。”
“可是，还没有失去呀。”
“那就等着瞧吧。”
“快回来，到阴凉地来！”男子说，“你不该如此多愁善感。”
“我这不是多愁善感，”女孩说，“而是心中有数。”
“我可不想勉强你做自己不愿做的事情……”
“也不想勉强我做对我不利的事情。”女孩说，“这我清楚，再来杯啤酒怎么样？”
“好吧。你应该明白……”
“我明白。”女孩说，“这话能不能不说了？”
他们又在桌子旁坐下。女孩望着河谷对面那干涸土地上的山峦，而男子则看着她和桌面。
“你应该明白，”他说道，“如果你不想做，我是不愿意勉强你的。假如你觉得此事很重要，我十分情愿陪着你，一陪到底。”
“难道这对你不重要吗？我们是可以挺过这一关的。”
“当然重要。我心里没有别人，任何一个别的人都没有，只有你。我很清楚，这样的手术十分简单。”
“是呀，是呀，你很清楚这样的手术十分简单。”
“随你怎么说吧，反正我心里是有数的。”
“就眼下而言，你能不能为我做些事情？”
“我愿为你赴汤蹈火。”
“我一千遍一万遍地求求你不要再说了，好不好？”
他没再说什么，而是看了看靠在车站墙根的行李，上面有各家他们曾在那里度过了许多良宵的旅馆的标签。
“我是不会勉强你的，”他说道，“对此我是无所谓的。”
“我要大声喊叫了。”女孩说。
酒吧女子端着两杯酒从珠帘后走出来，把它们放在湿漉漉的毛毡杯垫上。“火车五分钟内就到。”她说。
“她说什么？”女孩问。
“火车五分钟内就到。”
女孩冲酒吧女子嫣然一笑以示谢意。
“我最好还是过去把行李拿到站台的另一边。”男子说。女孩对他笑了笑。
“好的。搬过行李你再回来，咱们把酒喝完。”
男子拎起两个沉甸甸的行李包，绕过站台，将它们放在了另一侧的铁轨旁。回来时穿过酒吧，见那儿有几位等火车的旅客在喝酒，他自己也在吧台要了杯茴香酒，边喝边打量着那几位旅客。他们都在心平气和地等待着列车的到来。喝完酒，他掀起珠帘走了出来。女孩在桌旁坐着，冲他莞尔一笑。
“现在感觉好些了吧？”他问。
“感觉很好。”女孩说，“我感觉很好，没有什么感觉不好的。”
