把他们一个人留在家里

把他们一个人留在家里

Parents’ busy schedules don’t always align with the demands of a new school year. With competing priorities inside and outside the home, some parents must decide whether their school-aged child can be left home alone for parts of the day. Whether parents are running a quick errand or working after school has let out, many factors should be considered before handing over the house key to a child.

家长们繁忙的时间表并不总是与新学年的要求相一致。由于家庭内部和外部的优先事项相互竞争，一些家长必须决定是否可以让学龄儿童独自在家呆上一段时间。无论父母是在跑腿还是放学后工作，在把房子钥匙交给孩子之前，都应该考虑很多因素。

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Child Welfare Information Gateway, only three states have laws regarding a minimum age for leaving a child unsupervised at home (Illinois, age 14; Maryland, age 8; Oregon, age 10), while other states offer guidelines. “Parents should be aware that if their state does not outline the legalities of leaving their children alone, the courts do recognize the child’s maturity level, the safety of the child, how long the child was left alone and the parents’ concern for the child’s overall welfare and steps taken to ensure their safety,” says Rolanda Mitchell, an education counselor at North Carolina State University.

根据美国卫生与公众服务部的儿童福利信息门户网站，只有三个州有法律规定将儿童置于无人看管的家中的最低年龄(伊利诺伊州，14岁;马里兰,8岁;俄勒冈州，10岁，而其他州提供指导方针。“父母应该意识到是否他们国家没有列出独自离开孩子的义务,法院决定孩子的成熟度级别,孩子的安全,孩子多长时间独处,父母关心孩子的总体福利和采取措施保护他们的安全,“Rolanda米切尔，北卡州立大学的一个教育顾问说。

What to Consider

要考虑哪些方面

“Parents should look for signs of responsibility when their children are with them before leaving them home alone. Are they able to follow directions without being told repeatedly? Do they only follow directions if you are there watching? If they only follow the rules when you’re watching, it’s unlikely that they will follow them when they are home alone,” Mitchell says. “School behavior can also be a good indicator because school is where children spend the most of their time without their parents watching. If they’re misbehaving or violating rules, they may do the same when they’re home alone.”

“当孩子独自在家之前，父母应该在孩子和他们在一起的时候寻找责任的迹象。他们能在不被反复告知的情况下遵循指示吗?只有在你在场的时候，他们才会遵循指示吗?如果他们只在你看的时候遵守规则，那么他们一个人在家的时候就不太可能遵守规则。“学校行为也是一个很好的指标，因为学校是孩子们大部分时间都呆在没有父母看管的地方。如果他们行为不端或违反规定，他们独自在家时可能也会这么做。”

Set Ground Rules

设定基本规则

Talk with your children to find out how they feel about shouldering the responsibility of staying home alone. Some children may be ready for it, while others may hesitate or be afraid. Parents should let their children know what’s expected of them, including setting a consequence and reward system. “The child should know what will happen if they don’t follow the rules. Additional television or computer time, or even getting to choose what’s for dinner can give them some incentive to do the right thing,” says Mitchell.

和你的孩子谈谈，看看他们如何看待独自在家的责任。一些孩子可能已经准备好了，而另一些孩子可能会犹豫或害怕。父母应该让他们的孩子知道对他们的期望，包括设定一个结果和奖励制度。“孩子应该知道如果他们不遵守规则会发生什么。额外的看电视或玩电脑的时间，甚至是选择晚餐吃什么都能给他们一些动力去做正确的事情，”米切尔说。

Safety First

安全第一

Safety is another major concern for parents. In case of an emergency, children need to know what to do and whom to contact. This information should be written in a way the child can understand and posted in a place they can readily see. Parents should also make sure their child has access to a phone. Creating a check-in system will put both the parent’s and child’s minds at ease about this new adventure.

安全是父母们关心的另一个主要问题。在紧急情况下，孩子们需要知道做什么和谁联系。这些信息应该以孩子能理解的方式写下来，并贴在他们能看到的地方。父母也应该确保他们的孩子有手机。创建一个签到系统将会让父母和孩子对这个新的冒险感到放心。

Keep Your Child Occupied

让孩子有事做

Tasks or completing educational activities are great ways to keep your child busy. “Give them chores to do that you have seen them complete successfully,” says Mitchell. “Start with giving them things assigned by the school such as homework, worksheets or assigned reading. It’s important to not only assign tasks, but to follow up to make sure it’s completed by asking to see it or asking for details about what they read.”

任务或完成教育活动是让孩子保持忙碌的好方法。米切尔说:“让他们做你已经看到他们成功完成的家务。”“首先给他们学校布置的任务，比如家庭作业、工作表或指定阅读材料。重要的是，不仅要分配任务，还要通过要求查看或询问他们阅读内容的细节来确保任务完成。”

If you decide to let your child stay at home alone, there are benefits, explains Mitchell. “It demonstrates a great deal of trust between a parent and child and can strengthen the relationship.”

如果你决定让你的孩子独自呆在家里，这是有好处的，米切尔解释说。“这表明父母和孩子之间有很大的信任，可以加强关系。”