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双语·月亮与六便士 第二十四章

所属教程:译林版·月亮与六便士

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2022年04月22日

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Shortly before Christmas Dirk Stroeve came to ask me to spend the holiday with him. He had a characteristic sentimentality about the day and wanted to pass it among his friends with suitable ceremonies.Neither of us had seen Strickland for two or three weeks-I because I had been busy with friends who were spending a little while in Paris, and Stroeve because, having quarrelled with him more violently than usual, he had made up his mind to have nothing more to do with him.Strickland was impossible, and he swore never to speak to him again.But the season touched him with gentle feeling, and he hated the thought of Strickland spending Christmas Day by himself;he ascribed his own emotions to him, and could not bear that on an occasion given up to good fellowship the lonely painter should be abandoned to his own melancholy.Stroeve had set up a Christmas-tree in his studio, and I suspected that we should both fnd absurd little presents hanging on its festive branches;but he was shy about seeing Strickland again;it was a little humiliating to forgive so easily insults so outrageous, and he wished me to be present at the reconciliation on which he was determined.

We walked together down the Avenue de Clichy, but Strickland was not in the café.It was too cold to sit outside, and we took our places on leather benches within.It was hot and stuffy, and the air was grey with smoke.Strickland did not come, but presently we saw the French painter who occasionally played chess with him.I had formed a casual acquaintance with him, and he sat down at our table.Stroeve asked him if he had seen Strickland.

“He's ill,”he said.“Didn't you know?”

“Seriously?”

“Very, I understand.”

Stroeve's face grew white.

“Why didn't he write and tell me?How stupid of me to quarrel with him!We must go to him at once. He can have no one to look after him.Where does he live?”

“I have no idea,”said the Frenchman.

We discovered that none of us knew how to fnd him. Stroeve grew more and more distressed.

“He might die, and not a soul would know anything about it. It's dreadful.I can't bear the thought.We must fnd him at once.”

I tried to make Stroeve understand that it was absurd to hunt vaguely about Paris. We must frst think of some plan.

“Yes;but all this time he may be dying, and when we get there it may be too late to do anything.”

“Sit still and let us think,”I said impatiently.

The only address I knew was the H?tel des Belges, but Strickland had long left that, and they would have no recollection of him.With that queer idea of his to keep his whereabouts secret, it was unlikely that, on leaving, he had said where he was going.Besides, it was more than fve years ago.I felt pretty sure that he had not moved far.If he continued to frequent the same café as when he had stayed at the hotel, it was probably because it was the most convenient.Suddenly I remembered that he had got his commission to paint a portrait through the baker from whom he bought his bread, and it struck me that there one might fnd his address.I called for a directory and looked out the bakers.There were fve in the immediate neighbourhood, and the only thing was to go to all of them.Stroeve accompanied me unwillingly.His own plan was to run up and down the streets that led out of the Avenue de Clichy and ask at every house if Strickland lived there.My commonplace scheme was, after all, effective, for in the second shop we asked at the woman behind the counter acknowledged that she knew him.She was not certain where he lived, but it was in one of the three houses opposite.Luck favoured us, and in the frst we tried the concierge told us that we should fnd him on the top foor.

“It appears that he's ill,”said Stroeve.

“It may be,”answered the concierge indifferently.“En effet, I have not seen him for several days.”

Stroeve ran up the stairs ahead of me, and when I reached the top floor I found him talking to a workman in his shirt sleeves who had opened a door at which Stroeve had knocked. He pointed to another door.He believed that the person who lived there was a painter.He had not seen him for a week.Stroeve made as though he were about to knock, and then turned to me with a gesture of helplessness.I saw that he was panic-stricken.

“Supposing he's dead?”

“Not he,”I said.

I knocked. There was no answer.I tried the handle, and found the door unlocked.I walked in, and Stroeve followed me.The room was in darkness.I could only see that it was an attic, with a sloping roof;and a faint glimmer, no more than a less profound obscurity, came from a skylight.

“Strickland,”I called.

There was no answer. It was really rather mysterious, and it seemed to me that Stroeve, standing just behind, was trembling in his shoes.For a moment I hesitated to strike a light.I dimly perceived a bed in the corner, and I wondered whether the light would disclose lying on it a dead body.

“Haven't you got a match, you fool?”

Strickland's voice, coming out of the darkness, harshly, made me start.

Stroeve cried out.

“Oh, my God, I thought you were dead.”

I struck a match, and looked about for a candle. I had a rapid glimpse of a tiny apartment, half room, half studio, in which was nothing but a bed, canvases with their faces to the wall, an easel, a table, and a chair.There was no carpet on the foor.There was no fre-place.On the table, crowded with paints, palette-knives, and litter of all kinds, was the end of a candle.I lit it.Strickland was lying in the bed, uncomfortably because it was too small for him, and he had put all his clothes over him for warmth.It was obvious at a glance that he was in a high fever.Stroeve, his voice cracking with emotion, went up to him.

“Oh, my poor friend, what is the matter with you?I had no idea you were ill. Why didn't you let me know?You must know I'd have done anything in the world for you.Were you thinking of what I said?I didn't mean it.I was wrong.It was stupid of me to take offence.”

“Go to hell,”said Strickland.

“Now, be reasonable. Let me make you comfortable.Haven't you anyone to look after you?”

He looked round the squalid attic in dismay. He tried to arrange the bedclothes.Strickland, breathing laboriously, kept an angry silence.He gave me a resentful glance.I stood quite quietly, looking at him.

“If you want to do something for me, you can get me some milk,”he said at last.“I haven't been able to get out for two days.”

There was an empty bottle by the side of the bed, which had contained milk, and in a piece of newspaper a few crumbs.

“What have you been having?”I asked.

“Nothing.”

“For how long?”cried Stroeve.“Do you mean to say you've had nothing to eat or drink for two days?It's horrible.”

“I've had water.”

His eyes dwelt for a moment on a large can within reach of an outstretched arm.

“I'll go immediately,”said Stroeve.“Is there anything you fancy?”

I suggested that he should get a thermometer, and a few grapes, and some bread. Stroeve, glad to make himself useful, clattered down the stairs.

“Damned fool,”muttered Strickland.

I felt his pulse. It was beating quickly and feebly.I asked him one or two questions, but he would not answer, and when I pressed him he turned his face irritably to the wall.The only thing was to wait in silence.In ten minutes Stroeve, panting, came back.Besides what I had suggested, he brought candles, and meat-juice, and a spirit-lamp.He was a practical little fellow, and without delay set about making bread-and-milk.I took Strickland's temperature.It was a hundred and four.He was obviously very ill.

就在圣诞节来临前,迪尔柯·斯特罗伊夫过来找我,邀请我和他一起过节。他对圣诞节有种挺有特点的多愁善感,想和朋友们一起用合适的仪式来度过。我们俩都有两三周没见过斯特里克兰了,我是因为有一些朋友来巴黎玩了一阵子,我忙于陪他们;而斯特罗伊夫是因为和他大吵了一架,这次架吵得比以往厉害得多,他已经下定决心和他一刀两断了。斯特里克兰太不可理喻了,斯特罗伊夫发誓绝不再和他说一句话。但是,这个季节又触动了他感情中柔软的地方,他实在不忍心让斯特里克兰独自一个人过圣诞节。斯特罗伊夫推己及人地把自己的感情也等同于他了,他不能忍受在圣诞节这样一个理应相互恩爱的节日里,让这位画家一个人孤零零地被抛弃,独自悲伤。斯特罗伊夫在他的画室里安放了一棵圣诞树,我猜想我们能在上面找到一些可笑的小礼物,它们悬挂在喜庆的树枝中间。但是他不好意思再去见斯特里克兰了,因为这么容易就原谅斯特里克兰带给他的侮辱,未免太低三下四了,所以他希望当他决定和斯特里克兰重归于好时,我能够在场。

我们一起走到了克里舍大街,但斯特里克兰没在咖啡馆里。天气已经太冷,不能坐在外面了,我们在里面找了一个皮长凳坐下来。咖啡馆里又热又闷,空气因烟雾缭绕而变得灰蒙蒙的。虽然我们没见着斯特里克兰,但很快看到了偶尔和他下棋的一位法国画家,我和这位画家多少还算认识,他坐到了我们的桌子前。斯特罗伊夫问他近来是否见到过斯特里克兰。

“他病了,”他说,“你不知道?”

“病得厉害吗?”

“很厉害,据我所知。”

斯特罗伊夫的脸色变得煞白。

“为什么他不写信告诉我呀?我还和他吵架,我真是太蠢了!我们必须马上去看看他,他身边肯定没人照顾。他住在哪儿呀?”

“我不知道。”那位法国人说道。

我们发现没人知道在哪儿能找到他。斯特罗伊夫变得越来越难过了。

“他可能死了,没人会知道一点消息的,太可怕了。我受不了这个念头,我们必须马上找到他。”

我试图让斯特罗伊夫明白,漫无目的地在巴黎瞎找一个人是很荒唐的,我们必须首先有一个计划。

“是的,但也许就在我们想办法的时候,他可能快咽气了,当我们到那儿时,一切都为时已晚了。”

“你安静地坐会儿,让我们想想办法。”我不耐烦地说道。

我唯一知道的地址就是比利时旅馆,但斯特里克兰已经离开那里很久了,那里的人估计记不得他了。而且他有着奇怪的想法,不想让人知道他的行踪。所以,在离开那家旅馆的时候,不太可能会告诉人家他搬到了何处。再说了,这都是五年多以前的事了。但是我敢肯定的是,如果他还继续光顾他住在那家旅馆时常去的咖啡馆的话,就不会搬得很远的,因为这家咖啡馆对他来说,可能是最方便去的。突然,我想到了通过他买面包的那家店主人,他揽到了一桩给人画肖像的活儿。我灵机一动:问问这家面包店的主人,可能会找到他的地址。我叫人拿来一本电话簿,开始查找面包店。在那个地区附近有五家面包店,唯一要做的就是挨家询问。斯特罗伊夫不太情愿地陪着我,他自己的计划是在与克里舍大街相连的大街上都跑跑,见到每家旅馆都进去问问斯特里克兰是否住在那里。不管怎么说,我的具有常识性的计划更有效。在第二家面包店,我们问到的一位在柜台后面的女人承认她认识斯特里克兰,虽然她不能确定他具体住在哪儿,但她能肯定就在面包店对面的三栋楼里的一栋。幸运再次垂青了我们,就在我们尝试的第一栋楼里,门房告诉我们,在楼的最顶层可以找到他。

“好像他生病了吧。”斯特罗伊夫说道。

“好像是的,”门房冷冰冰地回答,“事实上[50],我好几天都没看到他了。”

斯特罗伊夫在我前面跑上了楼梯,当我爬到顶层时,看见他正在和一个穿着衬衫的工人讲话。在我到之前,斯特罗伊夫敲了一扇门,开门的正是这个工人,他指了指旁边的一扇门,认为住在那间房里的是一位画家,他似乎有一周没见着他了。斯特罗伊夫刚要敲门,又转过身来对我做了一个无助的手势,我看得出他有些惊恐不安。

“要是他死了怎么办?”

“他不会死的。”我说道。

我敲了敲门,没人应声。我试着拧了拧门把手,发现门没锁。我走了进去,斯特罗伊夫紧跟着我。房间里漆黑一片,我只能分辨出这是间阁楼,屋顶是倾斜着的,从天窗上透过一丝微弱的亮光,并不比房间里的昏暗亮多少。

“斯特里克兰。”我叫道。

没人回答,气氛相当的神秘,我好像能感觉到斯特罗伊夫在我身后,双腿哆嗦成了筛糠。一时间,我犹豫是不是该划根火柴,我隐约感觉到在角落里有张床,我想知道在火柴光下,会不会发现床上躺着个死人。

“你没有火柴吗?你这傻瓜。”

从黑暗中传来斯特里克兰刺耳的呵斥声,吓了我一跳。

斯特罗伊夫吓得喊了出来。

“哦,我的上帝呀,我以为你已经死了。”

我划着了一根火柴,四下打量想找一根蜡烛,借助火柴短暂的微光,我看到这是间很小的公寓,半间卧室,半间画室,除了一张床以外,几乎没什么家具,画布对着墙壁,一个画架、一张桌子和一把椅子。地板上没有地毯,也没有壁炉。在桌子上乱七八糟地堆放着颜料盒、调色刀和各种杂物,好在还有一小截蜡烛。我点着了它,看见斯特里克兰正躺在床上,因为床对于他的个头来说太小了,他躺得很不舒服,为了取暖,他把所有衣服都盖在了身上。很显然,只要瞅一眼,就知道他在发着高烧。斯特罗伊夫走到床前,激动得嗓子都沙哑了。

“噢,我可怜的朋友,你怎么了?我真不知道你病了。你为什么不告诉我呀?你知道我会为你做任何事情的。你还在为争吵而生我的气吗?我真的不是想惹你生气,我错了,我说的那些冒犯你的话真是愚蠢透顶。”

“见你的鬼去吧。”斯特里克兰说道。

“现在,你先冷静点儿,我帮你躺得舒服点儿。没人照顾你吗?”

斯特罗伊夫惊愕地环顾着这间肮脏的阁楼,他想帮着整整被褥。斯特里克兰费劲地呼吸着,气呼呼地一声不吭。他恶狠狠地看了我一眼,我十分安静地站在那儿,端详着他。

“如果你想为我做点事,可以给我弄点牛奶去,”他终于开口道,“我已经有两天没有出门了。”

在床边,有一个盛牛奶的瓶子,现在已经空了,在一张报纸上还有一些面包屑。

“你吃过东西吗?”我问道。

“什么也没吃。”

“有多长时间了?”斯特罗伊夫嚷嚷道,“你的意思是你已经有两天都没吃没喝了?太可怕了。”

“我喝过一点水。”

他的目光停留在一个大水罐上,这个水罐他一伸手就能够到。

“我马上去买,”斯特罗伊夫说,“你还要别的什么东西吗?”

我建议他再买一个暖水瓶、一串葡萄和一些面包。斯特罗伊夫找到这么一个发挥作用的机会很开心,他噔噔地跑下了楼梯。

“他妈的傻瓜。”斯特里克兰嘟囔道。

我摸了摸他的脉搏,脉跳得很快而且很弱。我问了他一两个问题,他都不回答,当我继续追问时,他生气地把脸转向了墙壁。我唯一能做的就是静静地等待。大约过了十分钟,斯特罗伊夫气喘吁吁地回来了。除了我建议要买的那些东西,他还买了蜡烛、肉汁和酒精灯。他是一个很能干的人,没有片刻耽误他就把面包和牛奶准备好了。我又量了量斯特里克兰的体温,有一百零四度[51],他病得着实不轻。

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